Things I learned in the first 6 weeks of breastfeeding

[jessplussomeonenew]

I'd thought I was well prepared for breastfeeding (reading, classes, watching friends etc) but there were some things I never heard beforehand which would have been really useful to know. I claim no expertise beyond my own experience of getting through the first six weeks of feeding :) but thought I'd share - and encourage others to do likewise - practical hints that I wished I'd known:

That "nose to nipple" is a good way to work out how far across your body the baby should be, but the chin should actually be closer to the breast than the nose when latching on.

That a good latch involves a mouth that's open wider than looks physically possible for a tiny baby's mouth!

That trying to visually check the latch during a feed a) tends to pull the nipple out and make the latch worse and b) can miss problems; how it feels is a far better guide to how it's going.

That for cradle/cross-cradle it's good to hold the baby's tummy in tightly to my body to help them feel secure - it also helps to tuck the lower arm out of the way below the body before bringing the baby in.

How to do sandwich and flipple/extended latch techniques.

That getting the baby's body into the right position before attempting to latch is more than half the battle - having help from another pair of hands can really help as you work this out!

That once the baby's in position you need to wait for a good gape and then move quickly to get the nipple in before it closes again.

That you shouldn't hold the back of the head or press the head against the nipple but instead bring the head close by supporting the side of the head (cradle) or neck (cross-cradle).

Hope this is helpful to someone!

When my dd was born I think the best advice I was given was to hold her closer to my breast while feeding. I was holding her as far away as I physically could (whilst still allowing her to feed) as I thought if I held her too closely she wouldn't be able to breathe!

Once that was sorted I had no problems. Maybe I would have avoided that issue if I'd attended breastfeeding or antenatal classes but luckily it was picked up by a midwife in one of the first few days so it did not go on for too long.

It's really great to get so many different perspectives. Definitely agree with knowing when the baby is actually feeding and getting tongue tie checked.

I know the same thing doesn't work for everyone (eg. laid-back never seemed to work for us as his head always slid off the breast!) so hearing how different people made it work is very interesting.

On the points about help with positioning, I too quickly learned to hate having him shoved onto me by well-meaning midwives (which mostly got him in position but taught me nothing about doing it myself). However, training my husband to pass him to me so I could align him easily without straining (post-section) and support him a bit so I had a free hand to help latch him on was really helpful in the early days when I felt I needed at least 3 hands!

Another one here whose baby has never done that big gaping latch thing. But she's definitely feeding well - gaining weight steadily, 50th centile, sleeps through and has done since 2 weeks, now at 18 weeks. I can hear her gulping and see her cheeks puff out, that's more useful than obsessing over latch unless you're having a problem (like nipple damage) IMO.

Hubba that's the kind of thing that reassures me! :)

One thing which no one warned me about was "every 2 hours" may mean one day every hour, another every 3 hours, one day a 20 min feed - the next 40 min. I had to check with the mw I was neither over nor under feeding!

I asked one midwife how to get dd in a position where she could breathe and feed and she said to hold dd closer into my body like "a set of bagpipes". That age helped me a lot.
I think the one piece of info to give is re. Cluster feeding as pps said above. And frequency of feeds. 2-3 hrs between feeds is just so unlikely. Ppl need to know that breast feeding is a tangibly different experience to bottle feeding in terms of all aspects of feeding patterns.

I think a lot of people forget about themselves in the first few weeks, and I know that's probably normal when you've just had a baby, but it's so important to eat and drink absolutely loads, and to try and get as much sleep as possible, but also to make sure that you do have a shower every day and you do try and get out.

A good nursing bra is really really important too, even if it just makes you feel a little bit more yourself.

For me it was accepting that there were no rules, each baby is different. Some babies bf every hour initially, whilst others can go much longer between feeds. Neither is wrong.

I was still bf DS1 when DS2 was born and they were completely different. Obviously, DS2 was a newborn, but he favoured a very different position from DS1.

Overall, the biggest thing for me was learning to go with the flow and allow the baby to lead the way without worrying about it. The early days for me were all consuming with very frequent bf's, but that did calm down somewhat.

That you should trust your instinct.

My baby had a poor latch and would scream at the boob. Three hv/mw said tt was not severe and not to cut.

I thought differently. Got it done. Baby fed a billion times better.

Breastfeeding should not be a battle. I love it now but hated it to begin with.

I think I was very lucky. I just popped baby straight on the breast as soon as I came round from anaesthetic ( caesarean) .
Nurses explained " proper" milk wouldn't come in for a few days.
Babies " root" for the nipple when they are hungry and you get that sort of low " hum" in your breasts and off you go.
Babies are fine without any nourishment for a few days but they like a good old gnaw on your tit's all the same.
I'm small breasted and I think that makes feeding a lot easier.

Yes yes to cluster feeding. My DC fed from 6-10pm every night for the first 12 weeks. Almost to the day of 12 weeks. And no one tells you that they do still want feeding even though you have just fed them. It made things much easier once I worked that out. Also after four hours of cluster feeding, my DC slept from 10 to about 2/3am which was a god-send. Load 'em up!

Never heard of cluster feeding, Four hours of feeding?

I put baby in bed with me, I think that's frowned upon now by most people. Regret it really as I still have dc climb into bed with me most nights.

Co-sleeping isn't frowned upon, it's the opposite in my experience?

Lying down feeds, saved my sanity and helped my stitches.

Cluster feeding is normal, you'll need someone to get you drinks, pillows, snacks, the remote control and your phone. Or be organised and get them before you start feeding.

Go to the loo before you start a feed if you can or else you'll have a sleeping baby and a full bladder.

Er, yes, four hours feeding. Would come off, after 5/10 mins wanting feeding again. But, I just stayed in bed (was winter) with tea and the telly on!

No gentle hum. More like an electric shock for me! Whew!

squizita biggest congrats on your new arrival, very nice to hear. Joy to you both :)

...(and sleep)

I would like to have known that contrary to the info I was given antenatally, breastfed babies do get wind. And that that doesn't mean you have a bad latch. Would've saved a lot of worry if I'd known.

I'd like to have known that babies are different like people are different. I struggled every day of the 8 months I bf DS, and not a one of the 8 months I bf DD.

She "got" it, he never did.

Things I discovered:

• that it hurt like hell for the first 10 seconds for three weeks then magically got better overnight. The latch was fine, it was my let-down mechanism. And this is normal.

• that feeding lying down is brilliant because you can snooze.

• that feeding lying down is doubly brilliant because if the baby feeds to sleep, you can make a little cocoon for them so they won't fall off the bed (which they won't if they can't roll yet) and then sneak off for a cup of tea

• that feeding lying down is triply brilliant during a heatwave because you can minimalise body contact between you and baby, meaning you don't have to peel yourselves apart at the end of a feed (useful if baby feeds to sleep)

• that it's ok, and normal, and natural, to feed to sleep.

• that yes, they can be hungry again already.

• that if you feed them at the first stirrings during the night, and if they are swaddled, they don't really wake up properly, so you can feed them and they just doze off nicely (disclaimer: this worked for mine. YMMV.)

• that there will be times when you are so hungry you can eat a big meal and then want to eat the same again.

My ds never really gaped. He was TT and snipped at 3wks, but even after that he sucked my nipple into position rather than gaping open for it.

Two things that worked for us even in the first three TT weeks was

• lying down feeding. absolutely brilliant especially for the colstrum days before i got all engorged
• nursing holding him sitting upright straddling my thigh (the same side thigh as the breast he's feeding from). no idea what this is called but it was genius. i was taught it at the bf clinic who diagnosed the Tt.

That bottle feeding is better than persevering to the extent that she loses over 20% of her weight and ends up in intensive care.

I feel so lucky with this ds was born when I was 11 my auntie also had a baby that year.( both fed for 24 months)I witnessed thousands of breast feeds before I was 14. When ds came along I just KNEW what to do.

that let down can really hurt: absolute agony to start and still sometimes painful now (dd is 5 months). And that there can be more than one let down per feed.

Feeding lying down works really well as you can doze at the same time :)

yy to the wind, dd has amazing wind, worse than ff ds's ever was!

'Baby-led breastfeeding' (Gill Rapley) was a fab source of information and I still refer to it occasionally now- anyone expecting reading this, I would really recommend it (as well as this board).

Oh, and it is possible to establish bfing very quickly and easily after a c sec, even if you spend the first hour after birth being sick!

that it can be such an amazing experience... I hated it with DS1, only managed a feed or two, didn't even go there with DD1, DS2 was lovely, and DD2 was totally amazing - in a way I never believed it could be :)

It may make you slightly fierce about your baby - I became far more possessive about DD2 (still am actually) I was much more chilled with the first two letting people hold them etc.

Rugby ball is great for Big Boobs and Tiny Baby stage, across body is easier after about a month.

That you will get lovely comments from the most unlikely people you meet. (smiling thinking about some of the things said to me with my admittedly short experience feeding)

My BF fed much longer through the night than my FF babies, but I barely had to wake for it, I just latched them on and went to sleep with them, twas bliss.

That BF is such a great excuse to get out of things you don't want to do

Sitting doing naff all... also pretending you cant do anything because you are feeding the baby... (sorry DH putting up a ten man tent and looking after three kids and the dog - I am feeding the baby!!)

Im having no more babies!

1 more, The breast feeding crawl - it really happens, and its awesome! My DS2 was about 6 hours old, had already been FF in delivery. Very dark quiet ward just me and him, skin on skin on my chest, and he started moving up, and over, and virtually latched on himself! I think it was the first time (after a traumatic delivery) I and actually realised that I had just had a baby and we were both okay, (was a bit dicey for a while). I'll remember that moment forever.