I have seen this comment many times from mnetters feeling that they have been made to feel guilty by midwives when they choose to bottlefeed for any reason.
I would just like to say that it can be really difficult to support women through any difficulties that they might be encountering without seeming to say 'breast is the best' way to feed a baby.
When a woman has made the decision to breastfeed, the absolutely worst thing the mum can do with a full term healthy baby is introduce a bottle of formula within the first week. Formula does not correct feeding problems, it compounds them especially if given via a teat.
Babies suck the breast differently than a teat which works in a different way. Mothers need to know how to latch babies properly and know when they are feeding effectively. Babies that are constatly at the breast are usually not latched on properly (causing sore/cracked nipples) or may actually be at the breast but sucking infrequently. Babies are often rooting to get on, then once they are there falling asleep. These babies are best to be stimulated to stay awake during a feed by gently stroking them, blowing gently on their cheek etc. All babies feed better when they are 'skin-to-skin'.
Because there are solutions to breastfeeding problems, midwives will try and dissuade mothers from giving formula. Yes you can express when a feed has been missed because a baby's stomach is full of formula, but a pump is not as effective as a baby at stimulating milk production. It is also the last thing that a tired mum wants to have to do. Also mothers feel undermined when a baby glugs milk out a bottle when they have faffed around at the breast. A baby full on breastmilk will always suck formula from a teat because it is something different. The amount of formula that a baby takes does not equate to how much EBM they need. Mothers then feel they are not producing enough. Confidence is then shattered.
When trying to support a woman through this time, midwives can come across as trying to make women feel guilty when they say they want to give a bottle. The woman needs know the downsides of giving a bottle at this stage. If she wants to still do that, then that is her choice. She should not feel guilty about it. It may make establishing breastfeeding harder in the longrun, but some women find they are still able to do that.
Unfortunately a number of women feel sad that they haven't been able to continue and often that is as a result of poor support from professionals. Sometimes women do not realise that the 'lovely midwife who told me my baby was starving and to give her a bottle' is the one who has encouraged her to fail in her attempt to breastfeed her baby.
Some women try breastfeeding and find that the experience is not one they enjoy. I personally think it great when women say clearly 'I hate this and want to bottle feed'. No problem I say, which formula do you want to give.
No-one should have the ability to make anyone else feel guilty. Women need information to make the right choice for them. Some women will decide that they cannot cope with the demands where breastfeeding has got off to a poor start. They have no need to feel guilty. They are making a choice that is right for them.
Breastfeeding going well is a wonderful experience. Women can get breastfeeding off to a good start by learning as much as they can before delivery and also by having professionals around who can advise them well. Unfortunately that does not always happen