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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

please tell me this will get better....

32 replies

NeedSomeSun142 · 06/06/2013 21:26

I had my little boy on sunday, been breast feeding really wanting to give it my best shot, but I really don't know how much longer I can carry on. I am so sore, cracked and bleeding.

I can't see how it will ever get better seen as they have no chance to heal. I am crying every feed dreading it.

Sometimes he latches on really well then pulls away and goes to the end of the nipple.

I've tried lanolin cream got some special heat packs and cool packs.

Any advice how to get past this stage I am really on the edge on giving up but I don't want to let him or myself down

OP posts:

NoodieRoodie · 06/06/2013 21:31

First things first, this isn't a stage you have to get through, you need help and you need it now.

It sounds that your attachment needs work, have you talked to your MW about this? Do you have a bf group near you? (MW should be able to tell you this) How was your feeding after you had DS, was it going ok when you were in hospital?

Mycatistoosexy · 06/06/2013 21:35

It does get better.

I remember the first week or two almost screaming in pain because it hurt soo much to feed. I just kept up the cream on my poor cracked nipples and kept going plus was very thankful for my post c-section painkillers

Ask your HV when they come round to observe your latch and see if they can help at all, ask for lots of help and support. There's lots out there.

In the end I think my nipples just toughened up

melonribena · 06/06/2013 21:36

This was me 10 months ago. It's so hard and no one tells you! It does get easier but will take time. It will be so worth all your hard work and you are doing so well!

If you continue to get pain please see a lactation consultant about your latch and get your little one checked for tongue tie.

I understand.

Original poster

NeedSomeSun142 · 06/06/2013 21:49

I thought I was doing really well but there was no pain then. midwife said the damage could of been done from one feed. Basic damage been done now nipples have to toughen up. but how can they toughen up or heal when they are being used again?
is there anything else, any tips to soothe the nipples?

I've got midwives coming tomorrow and going to ask what I am doing wrong. I just feel like I am putting myself through so much pain crying everytime it must be stressing him aswell.

I think there is a baby cafe near me but not sure what they do? I will ask tomorrow.

how long did the soreness last for you? I don't think I can cope for another 2 week's

OP posts:

peeohayess · 06/06/2013 21:49

Definitely speak to your HV or NCT bf counsellor or get a lactation consultant to come and help you out. But also, it does get better. And what melonribena said about tongue tie. Just for a quick check you can do yourself, look at the shape of your nipple when LO comes off - if it's shaped like a new lipstick the latch isn't right.

Lansinoh cream is brilliant, as are MAM compresses. Hope you can get something sorted out. I sympathise completely.

HumphreyCobbler · 06/06/2013 21:54

don't let your cracks dry out - this will mean that each time the baby latches on the cracks will re-break from the bottom and they do not heal. This happened very badly to me after being given well meant but incorrect advice to air dry - my lactation consultant said to keep jelonet covering the nipples between feeds. This really helped healing. You can get jelonet from most chemists. I found it less painful than rubbing cream in.

elvislives2012 · 06/06/2013 21:58

It gets so much better but it does take time. Try not to think of weeks, but just the next feed. That helped me. I also thought it was too hard to give up due to engorgement and risk of mastitis.
Go to a bfing group, there'll be one near by and go every week. Even if its just to chat. They don't just sit around talking boobs and I found it really supportive. Am still friends with someone I met thru my local one.
Also ring the nct helpline and check out kellymom
Religiously apply lansinoh (get the brand, nothing else is as good) after every feed.
And realise that you're doing brilliantly- your baby is getting just what he needs and it gets brilliant. So much so that I'm dreading when DD fully weans

Mycatistoosexy · 06/06/2013 21:59

The pain didn't last that long. It started up about a week in and lasted about a week. I agree with melonribena that no one tells you how hard/painful it is in the beginning and I got really really stressed out worrying about the latch and if I was doing it wrong.

Fast forward 11 months and now I have problems getting him off them!

Cream and cold compresses. Rub breastmilk into nipples just before and after feeds helps too from memory.

NoodieRoodie · 06/06/2013 22:01

When your MW comes ask her to observe a feed and help you adjust your positioning and attachment - she shouldn't be touching you she should be explaining so that you can do it yourself.

Ask her what other support there is close to you, breastfeeding cafe, peer supporters, etc.. get details and phone numbers.

Above all keep asking for help if you continue to struggle, breastfeeding should not be painful and you should definitely not have to put up with being in agony.

Wishiwasanheiress · 06/06/2013 22:01

Yup it will. Contrary to every other cut u ever have keep nips moist with lasinoah cream. Seriously. Heals better quicker.

Secondly badger every mw u have numbers for. Don't stop. It clicks randomly with one person. Thirdly, it's a skill like any other. All this it's natural will just happen is total bs. Slow down. It's just the next feed you need to think of. No further.

Fourthly, congratulations you lovely lucky lady! Give babe a cuddle for me! :)

Original poster

NeedSomeSun142 · 06/06/2013 22:08

thank you for your advice I keep telling myself it must get better. I will ask what help there is, I really don't want to give up.

I can't see a time there won't be pain. after the nipples have healed it doesn't hurt at all?

OP posts:

NoodieRoodie · 06/06/2013 22:12

Honestly once you get sorted it doesn't hurt at all!!

HumphreyCobbler · 06/06/2013 22:21

honestly, I had such a large crack on one side I still have the scar but I went on to feed my ds for three and a half years (you don't have to do it for this long ). I remember the early days of bf as more painful than labour tbh, I know how grim you feel right now.

I would see if you can be referred to a lactation consultant, midwives can tend to give a try this, try that kind of advice but proper help will look at your shape, and your baby doing a feed and give you specific advice pertaining to you. This is valuable.

HumphreyCobbler · 06/06/2013 22:25

This could be a useful thread. I know lots of people swear by lansinoh but I found it was agony to apply as the pain was so bad.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/breast_and_bottle_feeding/13366-jelonet/AllOnOnePage

HumphreyCobbler · 06/06/2013 22:26

sorry, me again. Has your baby been checked for tongue tie?

Original poster

NeedSomeSun142 · 06/06/2013 22:50

yes he hasn't got tongue tie. I've just fed him now, he seems to latch on really well then wants to pull away and suck just nipple?

is this something I am doing wrong? I will definitely ask about lactation specialist thank you again for replying

OP posts:

elvislives2012 · 07/06/2013 06:19

Am no expert but I think it needs to be a deeper latch but u need it checking. The closer to you you hold him the easier it is. Make sure his tummy is on yours as he's lying across you (if you're doing cradle hold) nice and tight. However, don't hold his head as he will want to move about.
It does stop hurting, I never thought it would. I remember that advert for follow on milk and the woman bfing her baby with an inane smile on her face and clearly in no pain at all. I used to shout at her cos it hurt so much! Fast forward to 8 months and I generally have a smile on my face when feeding except at 3 in the bloody morning

leniwhite · 07/06/2013 06:54

He might be pulling away because your milk lets down strongly? What happens if you take him off and try again by using your fingers to squeeze the nipple so he takes more in? Definitely see a lactation consultant - La Leche League really helped me and I struggled for 6 weeks without even being able to get my DS to latch, so you're doing great

fruitpastille · 07/06/2013 07:00

Nipple shields really helped me. Also expressing for a day when really bad to give nipples a chance to heal. I gave the milk in a bottle and didn't have any problems with nipple confusion. Also having a goal of getting to the end of the week can help.

FishfingersAreOK · 07/06/2013 09:28

Also make sure you are not doing what Idid when I started - used to get a great latch and then think brilliant, now I can shuffle around a bit so I am more comfy - and without realising I would shuffle baby too - and move my nipple to chin height rather than nose height (I think that was it) IYSWIM - and this meant that then milk flow wasn't as good, nipple rubbed on something...all very ouch. Got some advice and the expert realised immediately what I was doing. Got a more comfy starting position/supportive cushion and the shuffling stopped. Also seriously try lying sideways in bed to get things working.

carovioletfizz · 07/06/2013 14:10

NeedSomeSun, sorry to hear you are having problems and congratulations on your baby!

The Breastfeeding Network have a brilliant helpline that is staffed from 9.30 till 9.30, if you call them they are trained in talking you problems over the phone and may even have someone in your area that can come out and help.It's 0300 100 0212. Can you tell us what part of the country you are in? PM me if you like.

It doesn't just get better - BFing becomes a really enjoyable, lovely thing that you will be able to do with no pain or fuss once you get the technique just right. Have you tried watching any videos on youtube on how to latch baby on as often it is the latch that is not quite right if you are experiencing pain and cracked nipples. Try this one.

Here are some tips -

Remember, baby should have a wide, open mouth - imagine your mouth if you were about to take a bite out of an apple. Like that.

Take your time to latch him on - tease him with a bit of expressed milk on his bottom lip to get his mouth nice and open.

Make sure his body is in a nice straight line and he isn't having to twist his head to feed.

Do call the supporter line number above, they will really help you,and keep talking - you will get it right, it absolutely does get better, I promise - I was you once! Now BFing 18 month old DC4!x

Original poster

NeedSomeSun142 · 07/06/2013 17:55

thank you for taking time to reply midwife is putting me in touch with lactation specialist. I have nipple shields but midwife said baby will get used to them and it will be like starting again when I decide not to use them. just have to get past this weekend and hopefully will see someone
thanks again

OP posts:

HumphreyCobbler · 07/06/2013 18:40

keep posting through the weekend if it helps you though.

melonribena · 08/06/2013 09:40

Are you sure it isn't tongue tie? I got told countless times my ds didn't have one but a lactation consultant found a well hidden posterior tongue tie after 6 weeks of painful feeding.

Check your little one for a lip tie. If they have that they might have a posterior tongue tie that hasn't been spotted.

Google images for lip tie to see what it looks like.

I had an open wound on one nipple for about two months, was horrendous. But gradually healed after the tongue tie snip and feeding became much more bearable.

I agree with a previous poster. Don't set grand targets of eg 6 mths. Take it a feed at a time and be so proud of what you have achieved so far.

It won't seem like it now, but it will get better

ladypop · 08/06/2013 21:42

Def get second opinion on tongue tie and get some specialist advice. I agree that mw advice can be a bit generic, you need someone whose specifically trained and really knows their stuff. Well done - I know how this feels, bit when the latch is right it doesn't hurt and things will start to improve massively for you both x

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