Breastfed baby dropping centiles

[CommanderShepard]

I swear I am never going to catch a break with this.

Had my 13 week old daughter weighed on Tuesday and the lady (who I now know is a family support worker, whatever that may be) started having a bit of a go because my daughter has gone from being above the 75th line to just below it (the dozy mare didn't write down the weight in the red book despite my reminding her to, so I don't know exactly how much she weighs but I think it's just over 6kgs). I know I shouldn't be too worried but she really, really upset me and said basically that the Commanderling can't be getting enough hindmilk. This is compounded by the recent spate of green, mucousy poos which I know can be a sign.

I went to the local hospital's breastfeeding clinic today where I found out that the latch is just completely wrong, I've been holding her wrong... everything. Everything I've been worried about recently has been down to the latch, it seems. They got me to try a new way of positioning her, so that I have my legs apart and she sort of lies across them so that her bottom touches the seat (so she's almost folded up in a way) and then comes at my breast from underneath. We sort of got the hang of it on the right side but apparently when I'm feeding her on the left (I'm left-handed, if that helps) I lift her up rather than in and I'm not supposed to. They keep showing me with a doll and it's just making no sense because I swear I'm doing what I'm told and they say I'm not.

But now we're home I can't seem to do it right and it's really uncomfortable for me and she clearly doesn't like it. I don't have a long torso and they didn't have me using a pillow but at home even lifting my feet doesn't seem to get her high enough for me to feel comfortable.

I feel wretched that she's three months old and I'm still screwing it all up and if I'd done something sooner maybe we wouldn't be having this problem. It's all my fault that she's not gaining weight properly and apparently I'm too stupid to take instruction from BCs because as soon as they're not there I can't do it. I'm dreading taking her to her next weigh-in in case she falls even further down the chart.

Where the hell do I go from here?

Ok, first things first, what you've described as the centile drop sounds like a minor weight fluctuation. DD wiggled all around her centile line, its going to happen. Could be anything, time of day, fullish bladder, building up to a poo, anything.

Can you get a BFC to do a home visit rather than go to the clinic? Then you can get comfy and in the right position on your own furniture in your own home? You are doing a fab job, your baby is still growing well :) try not to get too worried about the scales xxx

The 'family support worker ' sounds anything but. Before you saw these people did you have any concerns about your baby? If not I would stop taking her to be weighed so often, disregard positioning advice and go back to what you were doing before.

The green mucousy poo could be entirely normal. Bf baby poo comes in all shades from chartreuse to korma.

Seriously, a drop from just above to just below 75th centile is not a cause for concern.

Especially at 13 weeks - unless bf is painful, it sounds like you are doing a brilliant job.

I agree with AnitaBlake; get a visit if you can if you are still concerned.

(ebf DS dropped from 10th to below the 0.2nd centile and then bumbled along there for 3 months and my HV was not concerned. He is now a hale and hearty 3 yr old on 80th centile for weight and height)

I was only worried about the mucousy poo and how often she's sick but I didn't think there was any problem with weight gain.

I've been trying to feed her all night in this new position but I can't get it to work at home in bed. I can't get her to take enough of the breast in. And she's gone from sleeping 3 or 4 hours at a time overnight to 2 to 2 and a half. I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong - I feel like I am too stupid to get this right.

Local BC appears to be on holiday.

Really as long as baby is attached right on the nipple latch is good. It doesn't matter which easy you hold her. We teach mums the cross cradle hold mainly as its the esait to teach. but there is no rule saying you have to hold your baby that way.

All you need is a nice straight neck, nose to nipple, wait for a big open gape. Them pull baby onto the nipple.

As for the weight gain it sounds fine, no baby ever stays put on the lines they are averages and will go up and down a bit. They shouldn't be worried unless they drop m more then 2 centile.

So all in all sounds like your doing a good job. Maybe try finding some better support if you still feel you need some help.

The 'new position' sounds terribly prescriptive. What basis did the bfing supporter have for changing how you held your baby during feeding? I've never seen a baby feed like that but I have seen/fed toddlers like that but that's because they are too big to hold in your arms so you use all of your lap to fit them on

If you were feeding your baby previously with their tummy facing yours, pulled close in so you touched along the tummy (not a big gap between you and baby), their head not twisted to the side or with their chin touching their chest then (head straight and either looking straight ahead or head tilted back slightly is fine) - (a bit like this) then why change it because of a tiny blip in her weight?

I'd second the suggestion to find some more supportive bfing groups or people as it doesn't sound like you have actually had any support from the people you have seen up until now

Can you try the LLL helpline? (sorry I haven't got the number to hand) they might be able to give you some support? Sounds like you need some 1-on-1 help love xxx

Going from just above a line to slightly below is NOT a percentile drop. Babies usually wiggle across lines. In fact, when I took my DD for her review recently, they said that she was unusual as she's stuck extremely closely to her line.

And if your hold was working for you, then stick with it. As DD has got older, the holds have slowly changed due to what's comfortable and what works for us. Saying there's only one hold is silly!

She's not dropped a percentile, she's still gaining, just a little less. Try not to stress about it. The family support worker sounds nuts.

Can you get to another drop in or group nearby? It might be worth having another one-on-one meeting with someone to go over things. Is the new position they've suggested you try comfortable for you? I can't imagine a still young and relatively small baby being able to latch like you're describing without you having to lean over slightly, which will give you back ache.

Sorry it all seems so confusing right now, you're doing fab.

Thanks everyone. I was a bit skeptical but it was Sally Inch and Chloe Fisher I saw so I figured they must know what they're talking about!

Husband has pointed out that the green mucous nappies have coincided with her starting to dribble and stick her hands in her mouth so it may be teething nappies and not anything to with my feeding. I've been trying to make sure she gapes and comes up to the breast from underneath and hopefully that will help. She's still possetty and a bit windy but I'm not sure how much a better latch would help with that.

On Monday the clinic is open again so I'll try again and the Baby Cafe reopens then too so I'll speak to the lovely BC I saw when the Commanderling was about 5 weeks and feeding was hurting.

That's the thing - feeding never hurts, so I can't be going that far wrong, can I?

Has she ever been checked for tongue tie? This is a useful article and if you suspect a TT, they can help you find someone in your area.

Breast feeding is such a personal thing, the midwives and HV's can give all the advice they want, but only you know your body and your baby. As others have said, baby weight fluctuates and is normal. Unless your baby becomes suddenly lethargic and takes a massive deviance from her normal personality, then you're both doing fine.

You should be proud of yourself for 1-actually BF, so many women don't & 2-doing it well.

I BF for 4 months and every feed was excrutiating and more like torture, my nipples bled and cracked, and no matter what advice I took it never changed. I carried on for my daughters health, but I wish it had been a nicer experience for us both.

I did ask about tongue tie but they dismissed it as very unlikely. Maybe I'm just being really oversensitive but it felt like they were more interested in the tiny newborns than my daughter. It was really busy to be fair.

I just fed her and she's screaming away and brought up a load of curdled milk all over my husband. She's been in a gritty mood all day following injections but she's never settled after a feed unless it's the middle of the night and I just can't understand what I'm doing wrong.

I'm going to ask and pay for one-to-one help but in the meantime I don't know how to carry on - it's making her miserable and me miserable and yet I can't bear the thought of formula.

If the position you have been shown in the clinic does not work well for you, then you must tell them - the people you mention are massively experienced and because of this, know they cannot have all the answers for everyone all the time.

The weight issue - I can't see anything at all problematic. This is a normal weight pattern.

Why did you go to the bf clinic? Because of the weight? Or was there some other issue?

If your baby is fine and happy, then green poo is not a problem either.

If you think everything is actually ok, and no one has convinced you that things are not ok, then of course you have an option of not doing anything - your baby is not ill and appears well, so maybe just stay in touch with the baby clinic and your HV rather than actually trying to 'fix' something that does not need fixing. I stress that this is only if everything is ok, and I'm not missing something or you have not missed something in your post.

Thanks so much, tiktok (my husband has just read your post and said "See! Listen to the sensible lady who lives in the internet!"). Truthfully I'm not worried about her weight - she has lovely rolls of chub on her legs and arms - but the being unhappy and unsettled after a feed and vomiting does worry me a bit.

Should I redouble my efforts to block feed to counteract any fore/hindmilk imbalance? I do have a hell of a lot of milk (I can shoot it a long way too!) and she refuses to feed more than every 3 hours or so normally - if I offer more often she screams the house down. Often that means I'm leaking excess milk until she decides she's hungry.

One more thing - she does have a dummy because she does love to suck but often doesn't want to feed and I only have two little fingers. Should I get rid of it? She's by no means dependent on it and I don't think she has nipple confusion but I figure it's a good idea to mention it.

You sound like you are feeling better, Commander

My DTs both had dummies; as I have said above, one bumbled along below 0.2nd centile, one was on 75th from birth right through to 6 months. Both had dummies and were ebf.

I wouldn't worry about the dummies - use them if they help!

It sounds like you're doing a great job. Breast feeding is a leap of faith because you can't see what's going in, so you have to trust yourself that you're doing the right thing.

My DS was born on the 92nd centile, then at around the same age as your baby he started dropping centiles and landed on the 50th, where he still is now. If your baby was losing weight, it would be a cause for concern, but some babies are born big and then start to adjust by not gaining weight as quickly as they were.

Green poo used to stress me out. I spent many hours on google stressing over it, but breast fed poo can change colour for all kinds of reasons. It doesn't sound like anything to worry about to me.

I used to feed DS in a laid back position. I had issues with him being sick 2 or 3 times a day and it was recommended that I tried the laid back position. I had a very fast let down and over supply, and the poor boy was taking in too much and bringing up what he didn't need. Try leaning back at a 45degree angle to feed. The baby can lie on your body rather than you struggling with a comfortable hold.

You're doing well, your baby is growing and thriving. Well done!

Hi Commander, just want to add that I think you are doing really well. I am certainly no expert, but it sound to me that weight gain is not a problem at all. I have been reassured that my 10wo DS who was born on the 50th centile is absolutely fine, he dipped to the 2nd centile and is on his way back up to the 25th. The BF midwife at the hospital told me that as long as he seems healthy and 'happy', not to worry about his weight and only weigh once a month. No-one - HV/Gps etc has ever told me they were concerned about his weight. I think you said she is not content after feeds but doesn't want to take more milk. Perhaps it is wind? Feeding naturally stimulates intestinal activity and I find my DS often cries for a little while after a feed and farts a bit. Sorry I don't have any advice on the vomiting though.

Commander, sorry, this is something you need to speak to someone in real life about. I don't know all your situation or its history - one option would be to speak to the bf clinic again and to take the chance to speak to a bfc on one of the bf helplines.

I was feeling better but now we seem to be back to square one and she won't latch on any further back than the base of
my nipple. If I try to make her take more in she screams and every feed turns into a battle ending with both of us in tears.

I can't find anyone in real life to talk to at the weekend and I'm scared to go back tothe clinic because I'm sure they'll think I'm not trying hard enough.

I want to give up but I don't, all at the same time.