Anyone else think feeding protests are freakshows??

[booomy]

I was at my local breastfeeding group last week, when this was bought up in discussion:

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2168820/Gang-lactivists-cafe-protest-waitress-told-breastfeeding-mother-Don-t-come-t--again.html

My initial reaction was good for her, can't believe someone would say that to a mother bf her baby. (Still BF my 11mo DS). When I got home and read the article and saw the photos, I was actually angry. In my opinion, these women have made bf a freakshow. The total opposite of all the work going towards making breastfeeding as a normal thing to do.

There is no way that the cafe owner should of got away with what happened. However, when 200 people turn up with signs that say 'mother suckers', I don't think anyone that saw them/read the article went home and said to their friends "oh I saw a wonderful thing earlier, loads of women protesting against ill treatment of their bf friend". What they probably said was "ewwww 200 people with their boobs out!!!"

Surely if the woman had said to the owner/waitress, a response such as i'll finish feeding then leave since i;m legally allowed to. Then contacted the local press, all the people in the cafe would of seen the owners as being the unreasonable rude ones, while an innocent mother fed her baby. The press attention may not of been as big, however it would of been the positive publicity bf needs. The situation was resolved, the cafe owner now has a sign saying 'bf welcome here'. He gave out coffee and cake to everyone there so obviously was sorry for what happened and so I don't see what the point was!

As a 'normal' mum, I had preconceptions about people that bf before I was pregnant. I'm a young mum and none of my friends breastfed. I try to encourage others to bf by just acting as though it's no big deal - which it isn't. I'm not going to go to a mass protest, or reply to everyone on twitter (like other mums and my bf group do). Sorry for the rant, but I want to just be normal and by drawing uncessary attention like this is making it seem as though bf is an issue, it's not!

I'd be interested in what others think of this issue!

It is NOT time limited! BIG MYTH - please stop it!

Several years ago there was a clause in the equality bill (IIRC) which mentioned 6 mths. It was withdrawn before it got to law.

There are no laws 'protecting' bf in England (cf Scotland) because it is not illegal to bf anywhere a mother and her baby happen to be. Just as there are no laws 'protecting' your right to, um, walk barefoot in the street, or wear a woollie hat on Fridays, or take sugar in your tea.....or whatever. None of these things are illegal and so they don't need 'protecting'.

In Scotland, it is illegal to harrass a woman or ask her to move if she is bf.

That is not the case in England, so there is no actual legal redress for a woman who has been asked/harrassed/ - but she can breastfeed whenever and wherever she likes no matter what the age of her child :) :)

Just had a look and the law has made treating a woman differently due to bf sex discrimination so no age limit phew

Was about to buff up my placard

:)

No, it's not time limited - but there is extra protection in the first six months which covers various other scenarios, not just BFing in public.

Say a cafe owner tries to stop you BFing your older baby, the Equalities Act 2010 still gives you the grounds to sue the bastard seek legal redress.

my sincere apologies!

i was told this by a Breastfeeding Counsellor and an NHS Peer Supporter Trainer then confirmed it again. I'll go back to them with the link above, so thanks so much for posting it!

X post TikTok

But women do have redress under the sex discrimination laws!

Sod it I need something to march against now, hhhmmmm save the whales anyone?

I wasn't going to post here because my opinion would be in the minority. But here goes! I don't think the mass protests done in this way are a good idea for this reason. People who don't agree with breastfeeding in public are just going to be even more anti breastfeeding because of the way these protests are carried out. (That's my opinion anyway.) And that's hardly the outcome we want. I don't know what the answer is. But it isn't this one.

What about La Leche league. I nearly joined once but didn't get round to it. I don't think I've ever seen it mentioned on MN.

BTW there is legal redress in England, though it's not as good as in Scotland - the Equalities Act gives women the right to take their complaint to civil law ie sue for damages.

I'd love to see the law tested in other areas, e.g. new mums who have to give up studying because their college/university won't accommodate their BF. This too is covered by the 2010 Act but few seem to know about it ..

I think the protest was a great idea. The pictures are lovely.

The best response to prejudice in society isn't to be quiet and accommodating so as not to provoke the prejudiced people. That's just letting them win - we need to take a stand against them.

Further clarification that there is NO age limit for the protection of BF mothers BF in public

Those pics are gorgeous very jealous of Emily Sinclair's lovelyness

What an interesting thread I can really see the points raised on both sides, there are some horrible stereotypes about militant bf mums and whilst this protest really raises the profile of bf which is great, it also can reinforce some of these views to narrow minded people who chose to make crass jokes or comments. Also thanks for clarifying the legal issues can bf my 7 mo without fear!!!!

All those happy little babies getting fed in the cafe at once, and none of them (or cared) knew they were being used as little feminist pawns! Good for the mothers, shame on the cafe.

Agree with you OP and think your point has been totally misunderstood by some in this thread.

I hated seeing those pictures too, its just the wrong wrong image, it will put so many off. Aggressive dreadlock woman with board saying Mother Suckers huge cringe They do damage to the cause of getting more woman to BF. No one wants to be associated with that stereotype. It's an image thing, don't they get that?

That is why environment campains failed to hit large numbers in the early days because of the association with Hippy, pot smoking, dreadlocks. IT was a huge problem at first but they have really smarted up, that is why now you see most environmental group reps wearing suits and having a much smater more scientist image than hippy. You look next time you see one talking on the news.

I guess we can't tell these woman that they actually do more harm for the campain just by being themselves. So your attitude is the best way forward, just get on and BF if more people see more "normal looking" everyday people BF and being respectful and mature about it then maybe it will gradually filter through.

I wish celebrities would feed more in public this is the sort of image needed for young people especially.

Well, you've only got to look on this thread to see some good of it. Some posters who didn't previously realise it now know their right to breastfeed wherever they want publicly is protected.

I'm not sure why some posters seem obsessed with the fact that one/some women in the protest had dreadlocks.... Astaril, the Mum with the dreadlock sis not the one carrying the 'Mother Suckers' board at all and none of them look 'aggressive', especially the lady with dreadlocks, she is smiling in the pictures. In one, she is feeding her baby and it's a wonderful photo IMO.

The part that bothers me the most is the fact that they see the manager putting up a 'breastfeeding allowed' sign as positive! I appreciate these signs (the blue stickers on doors etc) are designed to make women feel more comfortable, however I feel they send out a message to newbies and people with no bf experience that unless there is a sign it's not ok! As an example, I was out with MIL when DS was quite new and when considering where to go for lunch, she said of my suggestion "do they they have the sign that allows it?" MIL has no issue with me bf (that I'm aware of) yet saw it as the norm to seek out one of these pre-approved venues. she was immediately corrected!

i did a ring round of all the local pubs, cafes, play centres and visitor centres for a breastfeeding group about whether they were BF friendly.

some of the answers were quite shocking really. alot of them said, it was "at the discretion of the management", or that if someone complained about a bf mum in their venue then they would find it very hard to uphold the mother's rights.

i'm really glad to have been proved wrong about the time limit for bf and quite perplexed as to why people are being told that by professionals.

mysterycat that is ! So basically these people were telling you that they were quite happy to break the law!!! Just shows the problem is basic awareness - too many people in positions of authority just don't realise the law has changed.

Astaril - imagine if it had been a disabled person rather than a BF mum who had been treated this way. You would undoubtedly get the same sort of protests, the protesters would be carrying placards with strident slogans on them, some - shock horror - might even have dreadlocks. Would they be 'doing damage to the cause' of disabled people? Would others say they shouldn't protest?

I had a small amount of sympathy for the OP's point about not wanting to make breastfeeding a spectacle, but wanting to normalise it instead - then I looked at the article. Not a spectacle and I saw no 'freakshow'. (or bared breasts, for that matter) I agree with a post further up that said that we need to bang on all doors in order to get breastfeeding rights recognised.

Every time I get a bit uneasy about these sorts of 'feed in' protests, I ask myself - would I feel uneasy if the sit-in protests had been about someone who'd been barred from a venue because of their skin colour? or their sexuality? or because they were disabled? or because of their politics?

and I stop feeling uneasy.

.... Although, what's with the red bandanas? Is that what the lactivist on the street is wearing these days?

Nice to see all those slings, too.

[imagine if it had been a disabled person rather than a BF mum who had been treated this way. You would undoubtedly get the same sort of protests, the protesters would be carrying placards with strident slogans on them, some - shock horror - might even have dreadlocks. Would they be 'doing damage to the cause' of disabled people? Would others say they shouldn't protest?]

I don't mean that dreadlocks are bad, and I know them woman mean well, but inadvertently they are not doing the campain to normalise BF any favours. People make strong unconcious associations and some of these can lead to either a positive or negative trend and we don't want the BF stereotype to be thought of as something that only the hairy leg brigade do if you will excuse the expression. We want people to be able to identify with the woman they see BF not see it as a minority thing. so for people to get a positive association they need to see more everyday looking people BF, even better would be well respected people and icons like celebrities.

Well yes, Astaril, and that's an argument I've often felt sympathy with - but looking at the history of protest, change has come about because of protest across the board. I think it would be hard to point, in most cases, to the protests that finally caused things to change, but surely this will happen sooner if protest comes from everyone - sling-users, dreadlock wearers, Boden-clad and average? I don't want to apologise for breastfeeding my 18 mo and sometimes I do it wearing decidedly hippy clothes, sometimes wearing White Stuff. I don't think that women who happen to favour clothing and hair that some people would associate with counter-culture should be excluded from protesting and exercising their rights, just because this might reinforce certain stereotypes in a minority of onlookers.