Breastfeeding in public experience

[fallingandlaughing]

DD is nearly one year old.

So I have a year of breastfeeding in public (and private!) under my belt.

In all that time I have received a negative response... never! People rarely notice. If they do, they don't tend to comment, apart from older people who may say "Lovely" or "Well done". Once I was breastfeeding her on the bus and a very elderly man offered to hold her while I was eating. I explained she was eating too and he was amazed, and very impressed that we could multitask like that!

I just wanted anyone starting out BF to know about this. With all the controvery whipped up in the media lately you wwould think that there is a lot of negativeity amongst the general public. But that's not my experience.

When dd was much smaller, i went to a pub for lunch with my mum and as i knew a lot of pensioners often had their lunch their during the week, I took a botlle of ebf with me. Of course as soon as we got there she started kicking up a stink (refluxy/collicky baby who did nowt but cry) so I attempted to give her the bottle but she wasn't having any of it, so eventually i just gave her the boob! One elderly lady on the next table turned and said "there, she's happy now she's got the proper stuff!" and smiled! I think they were far more relieved that she had stopped crying than they were bothered about the breastfeeding!

there not their! I am thoroughly ashamed of myself!

I've breastfed out and about every day now and have never had a negative reaction. I think I would be much more nervous about bottle-feeding actually, as I'd worry that people were judging me.

Just remembered that I actually had a nice incident recently when I dropped my phone while feeding DS in a cafe. The teenage boy at the next table saw that I was immobilised under a feeding baby and retrieved it for me without embarassment. I don't think I was expecting a 15yo boy to be that mature!

it's more important to a 15-yo that you've got your phone!

Eurgh Skillbo!!

I had a creepy guy repeatedly trying to peep at me feeding DS on a train. So I loudly remarked about it to DH. He didn't peep around the seat again, thankfully.

Aside from that I have had nothing but absolute indifference from the general public, and I have fed 2 babies (well, still feeding DC2).

I've fed DS1 and DS2, nearly 3 years combined and never had any negative comments. But to be fair, I never got any positive comments either.

FIL looked a bit uncomfortable when I fed, but that's all.

I'm a bit worried I've become one of those women who smile at breastfeeding mums in a wistful way though. I saw a woman the other day feeding and honestly, I welled up as it just reminded me of me feeding my own two. It just brought it all back. What the hell I'll be like in 30 years time!!

I was out today and expressed before we went which saddened me a bit. Has anyone got any tips for breastfeeding in public, how to build up confidence, Best tops to wear etc....

pudding at the start, when the baby needs more help getting started, you can get special feeding tips from places like m&p. They're very dowdy though.

Or get one of these - www.fayeandlou.co.uk/description-butterfly.html

Tips=tops

My best tip pudding is Just Do It. Lots and lots of practice, and then it becomes instinctive. Today I fed in a cafe, a restaurant, a library and at a bus stop. If I had actually thought each time about it, who was looking etc. I'd have felt paralysed. Seriously, the more you do it the less you think about it and the better you'll feel and the more you'll realise that complaining/ smartarse tossers are few and far between

Maybe not the weather for it as we head into the summer, but tbh who knows with our summers(!), but I wear a vest with spaghetti stretchy straps under my tshirt or jumper. I then reach up between the two, undo my bf bra and pull bra and vest down. Basically my bra and vest under my boob and my tshirt or jumper is above. The vest isn't necessary but i didn't want to scare fellow diners in the cafe with my postpreg jelly belly!!

I just wore a big t shirt (glamorous, eh?!). I could never work out how to do the strategic pashmina placement without faffing around and undermining the discreet purpose. After a while DS could latch on himself with me just popping his head up my top in the vague direction of my boob, so no fumbling around with nipples into mouth.

pudding I agree with the others about vests/top combo, whip one up and one down and nothing is on show.

Also practice. Start somewhere quiet - park bench; then move to somewhere a bit busier - coffee shop mid morning, then a bit more busy like out for lunch.

Have you got a bf support group/cafe? They're always great to attend, I went for 2 weeks before feeding outside of the group. You can just watch others, pick up tips and build your confidence in from of other nursing mums.

I found feeding in front of a mirror at home first helped. You can actually see what's exposed (which honestly isn't a lot).

I also would take someone with you, supportive DP, parent or friend who can sit in front of you initially, can be your 'mirror' (I'd ask DP if anything 'on show'), get your coffee etc .

If you're in stoke on Trent area I'd happily meet up with you

i just wear normal teeshirts (in the next size up)
normally with a cardi - when the top hoicked up, if you're sitting, you can't see anything.

Never any negative comments here either.

Remember, if anyone does comment negatively, it's because they have issues of their own, it's not your problem.

Always good to remember that sometimes people do look, but usually they are thinking nice things. I often notice women breastfeeding, and it makes me smile.

Me neither. I'm bf dd2 and fed dd1 too and never ever had a comment. Most people think i'm just cuddling the baby as i do the vest down, top up technique too. Because you cant see any skin no-one seems to notice.

I went to an agricultural show and sat away from crowds on a field, an old lady came over saying how awful it was that they didnt have enough seating to sit with my baby, i was waiting for dd2 to crane her neck round and give the woman an eyeful of nipple but she didnt. For once!

And i thought i was going to get into my first debate at a jubilee party when an old woman asked 'would you be better off sitting out the back somewhere?' i got all bristly saying 'no, i want to be part of the party, why are you offended?' she exclaimed no and she'd bf her son til 16 months! That'll teach me to get arsey.

I bf DD to 15 months and never had a negative comment either. I breastfed in NT properties (got offered a seat if halfway around the tour), walking around the supermarket, cafes, bars, very posh restaurants, on the motorway, in the back of the car (via contortion so safety wasn't compromised), on beaches, hillsides, in cathedrals and churches, can't think of anywhere I didn't feel able to breastfeed.

Thank you for the advice, going to go to my local baby cafe next week to try and gain a bit of confidence. I failed to bf my two other dc, and am determind not to give up this time.

in the choir stalls is amusing.
last sunday, she got ever so fretful during the service.
i ended up going to communion and singing the post-communion anthem with DD shoved up inside my surplice
I looked like i had had a very very bodged boob job!

i managed ok today, even though i sure picked my spot. i was in a supermarket cafe, which is right at the plate glass front of the store.

it was busy enough that i couldn't get a cosy corner, so i decided in my wisdom to face the window and have my back to most customers while i latched 7 wk old DS2 on. i failed to notice i was right at the trolley pick up bit so had loads of folk milling about at the window! DS2 behaved very well with no screaming and bobbing around though so it was quite chilled.

he was cooed over by the ladies at the next table too when he finally emerged from my shirt.

i am modelling the pregnancy bump band to hide wobbly tummy today, the vests I've got aren't big and stretchy enough so i need to get some more.

recommendations for good cheap vests please? :)

at facing the trolley park

You did fine.
I always struggle with the latching on and re-dressing afterwards. (especially now that DD gets distracted, pulls off and grins at me whilst her head is a good foot away from my boob ).

Second time round here, have fed on buses, tubes, coaches, trains and even in a sling while playing with DD1 in the park, and in all weathers all over U.K, never had a bad word said. I just tuck a muslin into my bra strap on feeding side and pull across for modesty.

Quite miffed actually, had all my best retorts ready and waiting

Primark for vests.

A close friend of our family who is mentally challenged had a baby girl when I was about 14. She was the fourth breastfeeding victim to be attacked by a pervert with a fetish when she was in a quiet breastfeeding room. Luckily she IDed him so she was his LAST victim!!

Scared me right off the concept though. :( Very glad you've all had positive experiences, as it should be!