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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

HV just told me to night wean 8 mo

44 replies

QueenKong · 14/02/2012 16:14

I'm so bloody annoyed. I only went to get DS weighed, I didn't need a lecture about his sleeping habits. She said at 8 months old, most babies are sleeping through and that by continuing to feed him at night I am preventing him from becoming independent. I didn't even tell her we were co-sleeping!

I got all ballsy (unusual for me) and said that feeding him at night wasn't bothering me so I'm going to continue. Now I'm home, I'm
starting to doubt myself.

Argh. It's not true is it? Poor little one is cutting his top 2 teeth at the moment and
looking for comfort (boob) fairly frequently.

OP posts:
Nevercan · 14/02/2012 16:18

My 8 month old is still having one feed during the night and has not shown any signs of not wanting it yet. Ignore her and stick to your instincts Smile

shesparkles · 14/02/2012 16:21

My dd still had a night feed at 8months. Can't remember when she dropped it, but it was before she was a year. She's now a gorgeous 14 year old with a size 8 figure and legs up to her armpits.
I've clearly scarred her for lifeHmm

TruthSweet · 14/02/2012 16:21

Why would parenting as you do in daytime, at nighttime cause issues with your baby not being independent?

Not that you really expect an 8m to need to be independent at night unless you didn't respond to them during the night.....

Sounds like you are parenting as your baby needs you too so why go changing?

HappyCamel · 14/02/2012 16:22

Well ive just night weaned my co-sleeping 10 month old and used the Solihull Method to get her to sleep in her own cot. In all honesty she is sleeping better and is happier for it, her day naps are more regular and she is less grumpy. In retrospect I could have done it sooner and she would probably have been better for it. We are doing BLW and she is eating better too, now she isn't so full of milk, which is important for nutrients as she heads towards a year. I'm bfing and am generally baby led but I'd say your HV is pointing you in a direction it would be good to start to think about.

QueenKong · 14/02/2012 16:26

Happy Camel - can I ask what the Solihull method is or where I can find out about it? Thanks.

OP posts:
worldgonecrazy · 14/02/2012 16:39

If night feeding isn't bothering you then why should it bother anyone else? My DD naturally stopped feeding during the night around 11-12 months.

Happy Camel until 12 months most of your baby's nutrition should still be coming from milk, not from solids. Two months may not seem a long time to an adult, but it's quite a long time in terms of baby development and growth.

QueenKong well done for being ballsy. You are right to do exactly what you are doing, especially when spurts and teething are taking place. Don't let some ill-informed HV make you doubt yourself. Of course you're not preventing your baby from being independent - quite the opposite in fact! By giving him comfort and security when needed, in no time at all he will be a happy, confident and secure toddler off exploring the world, knowing that you are there for him when needed.

puds11 · 14/02/2012 16:42

QueenKong i co-slept, and continued to night feed until my daughter was 15months. I dont know where shes found these babies that sleep through, but me and most of the parents i know havnt had a full night sleep in a while! Shes spouting nonsense stick to your guns and do what you think is best for your child (which you are)

Haziedoll · 14/02/2012 16:45

Well if it's not bothering you thats fine but a lot of people having to feed in the night would probably want to start reducing this by 8 months so maybe she got the wrong end of the stick.

QueenKong · 14/02/2012 16:45

Thanks worldgonecrazy, you are right. We have a super king bed, so plenty of room and both DH and I love having him in with us. He doesn't even feed that much in the night, just little nibbles here and there. Hate the fact I second guess myself so much!

OP posts:
OneLittleBabyGirl · 14/02/2012 16:45

My 10mo still has a night feed and she's not one to feed to sleep! She has the balls to want a bf and then cuddles at night. What would your HV say?

And DD was in her cot until 7mo. Then she went through a phase of not wanting to go into her cot so I just responded by cosleeping. What I try was just put her in her cot first and if she screams she comes to the big bed. No need to force them and she went back in when she's ready last week. She's now sleeping in her cot again but still wakes up once for a feed.

TheRealMBJ · 14/02/2012 16:45

HV have no place in telling parents how to parent their children unless there is concern for the child. Sounds to me you are doing a great job responding to your baby's needs. No need to let some interfering busibody's ill-founded, unresearched and frankly incorrect opinion doubt yourself

YuleingFanjo · 14/02/2012 16:48

DS is almost 14 months and still feeding at night. I do wonder if I should feed less so he eats more as he doesn't eat many solids. No way can I do any kind of Controlled crying though.

TruthSweet · 14/02/2012 16:48

Looking into the Solihull method it seems it just another CIO/CC sleep training method but with extra parental support so they don't crack hearing their baby cry and go and comfort them before the proscribed time Sad

DD1 was night weaned at 12m (regretted it later), DD2 stopped waking in the night at 16m* and DD3 still has occasional night feeds at 2.4y BUT she has nasty eczema and bfing her calms her down enough to sleep.

  • I also happily gave DD2 night feeds when she was 3 and had arthritis as nursing gave her pain relief over and above what the drugs were doing and it had the added benefit of not making her feel sick or vomit.
worldgonecrazy · 14/02/2012 16:49

The "Solihull method" is controlled crying, but supporting the mother to ignore her instincts child's crying.

lisaro · 14/02/2012 16:50

HV's are at best a waste of space. Ignore her, you sound like you're doing fine.

YuleingFanjo · 14/02/2012 16:51

A quick google tells me the Solihul method is controlled crying?

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 14/02/2012 16:52

I'm still cosleeping and loads-of-nightfeeding my very nearly two yearold. Ignore the hv.

juneau · 14/02/2012 16:58

Well ultimately it's up to you what you do - your baby, your sleep (or lack of it). But nutritionally he doesn't need to feed at night at 8 months old and continuing to do so will encourage him to keep waking. Now if you're okay with that the only person who has to shoulder that burden is you, but I've just night-weaned my 9-month-old and I have to say it's bloody marvelous to have a full night's sleep again.

Tmesis · 14/02/2012 17:02
YuleingFanjo · 14/02/2012 17:14

may I ask - is there any way to night wean without doing CC? I really won't do it but would love a full night's sleep.

TruthSweet · 14/02/2012 17:17

Elizabeth Pantly's No Cry Sleep Solution or that old stand by 'Time'

QueenKong · 14/02/2012 17:27

Ah, that's the Solihull Method out then. I absolutely cannot do CC. And if I did I would be hampered by DH, who turns into a blubbering wreck if DS so much as whimpers! Hmm

Time it is then!

OP posts:
TheRealMBJ · 14/02/2012 17:28

I night weaned using Dr Jay Gordon's (google it) method when DS was 18 months old. He did cry but never alone. It was a few nights of hell but I was with him the whole time

TheRealMBJ · 14/02/2012 17:29

Oh, and Dr Jay doesn't recommend it before 12 months

juneau · 14/02/2012 17:47

Yes, you can night-wean without CC as long as you've already got your child used to falling asleep on their own. With DS1 I rocked and BF him to sleep every night and had a complete nightmare getting him to sleep on his own, so this time I made sure to put DS2 down awake from day one so he'd learn to self-soothe.

For the night weaning I followed Dr Michel Cohen's advice for an 8-month-old, which is to verbally reassure when the baby wakes, but not to pick up. It took two nights and he barely cried at all (a minute or two at most).