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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Is my 4 1/2 month old feeding too often? (EBF)

91 replies

LittleWaveyLines · 08/11/2011 20:06

During the day she currently feeds every hour to hour and a half, except if we are out when it extends to 2 hours before she gets majorly grumpy.

At night I have one 3 hour stretch between feeds, then it reverts to 2 hourly to hourly feeds.

She has never gone longer than 2 hourly with one 3 hour stretch at night. NEVER. (I'm a but tired...)

Is this too frequent? Or is this normal? When can I expect it to stretch out a bit?

OP posts:
JoinTheDots · 08/11/2011 20:12

That's the exact pattern my DD was in at that age!

I cannot entirely remember when it improved but I know I was getting a 4 hour stretch at 6 months at the start of the night and then it was 3 hours and 2 hours until morning. Daytime was 2 to 4 hourly (depending on what we were doing) by 6 months too.

I know my DD was one of the more frequent feeders but still normal I think. It gets better I promise!

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 08/11/2011 21:25

Thank you JoinTheDots. 6 months... I suppose I can cope for another month and a half! Is your DD super alert during the day as well? My DD needs constant entertaining...

OP posts:
organiccarrotcake · 08/11/2011 22:02

Sounds like you have a classic "high needs" baby :) The theory is that by responding to their needs they will slowly subside, and in fact in my experience this really does seem to work (and makes sense really).

I find Dr Sears to be useful for support and tips on parenting high needs bubs. He's written some brilliant books, and he also has a website - www.askdrsears.com/

organiccarrotcake · 08/11/2011 22:04

BTW high needs bubs are exhausting, but amazing. They seem to just be jam packed with personality and the joy of life (which can also come out as - um - getting a bit cross, too!!). :)

Mampig · 08/11/2011 22:11

Well then, I got me one of those too!!! VERY similar pattern to my 19 wo, but I just thought he was hungry all the time!! Wink. Give me strenght, another feed pending!!!

Albrecht · 08/11/2011 22:12

Yes . You might want to work on ways of maximising your sleep as it might take a while before you get a really decent stretch. Going to bed at 7pm every so often or getting someone to take your dd first thing so you can get a lie in.

And you'll want to baby proof your entire house as they can be quite inquisitive. Even above their height... the number of dangerous objects ds has grabbed while being carried around...

organiccarrotcake · 08/11/2011 22:18

Yes. PMSL. My 16 month old has just worked out how to climb over the bedside guards (we co sleep) - from the floor side. They're a good foot taller than him.

He pushes the kitchen chairs around the place to be able to reach where he wants to reach.

Sleep is for wimps Grin.

On the positive side, he can now go a whole day without BFing, as long as I'm not there. It does, of course, eventually start to slow down! He even sleeps for up to 6 hours now. Sometimes.

Albrecht · 08/11/2011 22:26

Mine is also 16 months! Never done 6 hours though Envy - (sorry OP).

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 09/11/2011 09:17

Albrecht Grrrrrr [EvilEye]

Mampig I always seem to come across you on threads - it does seem to sound like we have VERY similar babies! Grin

organiccarrotcake High needs Hmmm. I had heard the phrase before. Shall see if I can get the book from the library. My Mother says this is retribution as I was the same and I shouldn't pick her up so often but let her be.... I can remember screaming in frustration from a VERY early age so I dearly hope she's not going to be like that!

My mother and other people have also said it's the mark of a bright child, but I think that's something they say to make you feel better......

Sleep, is indeed, for wimps. My bedtime is currently 9pm at the latest....I am a wimp! Grin

OP posts:
CharCharGabor · 09/11/2011 09:30

My dd1 was exactly like this, fed very frequently during the day right up to about 10 months ish (sorry!) Since then though she has become a bright, happy, laid back child who is extremely confident and sociable. She is 4 now and I can't get her near me :D I do honestly believe that meeting their needs at this stage, even though it can be hard, leads to them feeling secure that you will always be there when they need you and then they gradually lose the need to 'check' as much. It seems that this is the case for DD1 and DD2 is very similar.

Mampig · 09/11/2011 11:24

I know LittleWavyLines!! Feel like I know u!! I def seem to know your baby well!! Ha ha! Grin at least we are not alone!!

Mampig · 09/11/2011 13:08

Even started thinking about weaning- ds is extremely annoyed when we are eating, wanting our food. Holding off just yet tho to see if all this feeding settles down Smile

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 09/11/2011 13:22

Hmmm a HV suggested weaning to me... but my dd is really not interested - just wants boob! Grin

I'm sure I remember reading that you've got other children? Were they like this?

OP posts:
Mampig · 09/11/2011 14:33

They (3) were ff after failed at bf Sad. But they were all hungry monsters! I remember with dd1 I contemplated hungry baby formula at 6 weeks!! But held off. Eventually weaned at 17 weeks- ok at the time but couldn't come quick enough for me tbh! Was no time till she was on 3 meals a day! Plus she slept through early enough. Never had this before with all night feeds etc, and I know I can't blame bf, but sometimes I feel like I should Grin. Suppose I'm out of my comfort zone really, but so far trying to just go with flo as I'm just so happy that I got bf established thus time around!

RubyrooUK · 09/11/2011 14:54

My DS basically held a nipple in his mouth for every second of his first five months. At 4.5 mo, I could get out to the shops but often had to breastfeed in the supermarket cafe. No-one told DS that even two hours without feeding was possible.

At 15mo, he no longer feeds by day as I work full time but is still obsessed by night - he fed seven times between 7pm and 6am last night. I thought my nipples would fall off.

He would never take a bottle and if you try to give him one at night (even expressed, this isn't about formula), he acts like you are crazy. I've seen some of his friend's happily move to bottles but DS is firm in his belief that breastfeeding is ace. And should be done as often as possible.

(Actually one of his friends who is ff couldn't go more than 1.5hrs without milk, so some babies are just like that.)

So OP, your experience sounds entirely normal to me. Sorry you are so knackered (I'm still very tired!) but it sounds like you have a happy baby getting what they need.

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 09/11/2011 15:18

Mampig Smile nice to know there's someone going through the same thing even if this is your 4th (!)

RubyrooUK I have been known to have to feed her in the sling walking back from the corner shop, so it sounds very similar! Thanks for the reassurance... when everyone you know in real life is having a completely different experience - you start to wonder!

OP posts:
organiccarrotcake · 09/11/2011 16:02

Nope, you are Very Much Not Alone. Many people don't talk about it though, as high needs babies can be soooo tough, that it almost sounds like either you don't love them, or that you're doing something wrong (because everyone with lower needs babies has a suggestion about what you could do, not realising that there's very little you CAN do other than go with the flow).

Fortunately (in a way) DS1 was low needs, easy as pie. While DS2 was a real shock therefore, at least I knew for sure that I wasn't doing anything wrong.

I (and all, I'm sure, parents of HN babies) will have had the "you need to put them down and not spoil them" crap spouted at them. If you saw DS2 now at 15 months, Mr Independent, I'llbuggeroffatheslightestchancewithoutalookback, you would have to laugh at the threats of permanent apron-strings that I'd been warned about.

Your story is identical - my mother also says I was just the same. I, apparently, screamed for the first 6 months. My father, he tells me, stood at the top of the stairs and had to physically step backwards to stop himself from throwing me down them. I know that DS2 would have screamed for 6 months, too, had I not met his needs of feeding on demand (wish he hadn't had a tongue tie, as his constant feeding was really tough) and being held. I am very lucky to have an amazing, supportive DH.

JoinTheDots · 09/11/2011 20:19

Is my DD slurry all day oooooh yes! And currently pushing through 3 new back teeth so also cross and frustrated!

Organic is right, people will give you advice about how to force independence but I think it is something that comes with age, not training.

Keep posting if you need to let off steam, we are all in it together!

JoinTheDots · 09/11/2011 20:20

Slurry? That should be alert. Damn you auto correct!

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 09/11/2011 20:44

That's a GREAT autocorrect! Grin

Well I have a works Christmas meal to attend in less than a month - when I booked I thought "yeah, nearly 6 months old by then, I'll be able to leave her for a few hours".... HA HA HA HA

Ah well....

organiccarrotcake Tongue tie as well as high need, poor you! You did bloody well then!

OP posts:
Mampig · 09/11/2011 21:09

Ha Ha LittleWavey, my works night out is early December!! (you sure you're not me!!) Had same thoughts too, but I'm going - need the drink break!!
In fact I'm looking for an outfit tomorrow, ds in tow ofc!!!

Original poster
LittleWaveyLines · 09/11/2011 21:42

No I only have the one child so can't be you! Grin

Good luck outfit shopping!

OP posts:
organiccarrotcake · 09/11/2011 21:47

wavey and severe dairy intolerance too Grin. Ho hum.

I'm pregnant again, too. What was I thinking???!!!

crikeybadger · 09/11/2011 21:52

Oooh are you organic?

Hey congratulations!! Grin

organiccarrotcake · 09/11/2011 22:03

Grin yep. Thank you!! Sorry, had announced quietly on the BFing while pregnant thread but it's no longer something I'm keeping quiet. :)