2 week old still not back to birth weight- sleepy baby

[Needsomewine]

I'm feeling a bit sad tonight. Dd is 2 weeks old and is still not quite back to birthweight of 6lb 3oz. She is very sleepy and only feeds every 4 hours. Please don't tell me I need to feed her more often as some of her 4 hourly feeds are very hard work in terms of keeping her awake. I often have to take her off the breast as she has fallen into a deep sleep. She feeds naked and I wake her up up to 8 times during a feed. However, she can feed really well, I hear her glugging milk down and she has very wet nappies throughout the day. She only poos once every 5 days so god knows what weight she'd be if she poo'd more often. I topped her up for the first week or so as she was tongue tied but she then started settling between feeds just on my milk so I stopped top-ups. When she has a good feed, she will posset so I don't think she would tolerate top-ups anyway. I keep her on each boob for at least half an hour (in total), longer if I feel there is still milk there. What am I doing wrong. She only lost about 5oz as I topped up in the first week so why isn't she gaining well? Any thoughts would be really appreciated:).

[Needsomewine]

Ok thanks tiktok:). I think she is doing better. She did sleep til 9pm last night and then fed , didn't settle so fed again at 10.30. I then woke her at 1, 4 and 8 (too lazy to make it 7:/) and has fed well each time. I will aim for 3 hourly today. I really hope her weight has gone up on wednesday though as I'll be quite demoralised I think!

[Zimm]

Glad you doing better OP. I also second switch feeding - I used to switch DD every 5 minutes if necessary as she would just nod off otherwise! It's fine to do especially if you always then switch back - so offering at least 4 sides per feed. Urrrgh waking a baby to feed at night sucks doesn't it. It might help you to know we were able to stop doing this by 3 weeks and then we were the envy of our NCT friends as DD would do 6-7 hours sleep at the start of the night but just feed loads in the day. So sometimes the sleepy babies turn into dream babies once they are over the initial hump!

[Needsomewine]

Thank you zimm, yes dd1 turned into a good sleeper once she got going too. I am here expressing at 4am again as too upset to feed dd2:(. We have baby scales from dd1 and stupidly weighed dd2 last night. She had only gained about 40g from we'd. I know that won't be enough for HV. I just wish my hard work would pay ogff but instead will prob end up giving up. Why isn't she gaining weight:( :( :(????

[InvaderZim]

I had a baby who would only feed every 4 hours! We had serious sleepiness issues combined with no latch, so had to pump and toP up for several weeks. Kiddo absolutely refused to feed more often so we just had to feed More volume!

Also, a gain is still a gain!

[LoveBeingAMummyAgain]

Op my ds is almost 2weeks old and quite a sleepy chappie. He does have jaundice though. I'm assuming yours doesn't cause you've moved to hv now?

Ds always falls asleep during feed, as did dd, so I try a few things to wake him up. Once he has crashed out I change his nappy and then feed again. Striking/tickling his feet also works.

I'm not allowed to let ds go more than 4 hours cause of jaundice so do understand how tired you are at the moment.

I would also say stop weighing him. It's not actually helping and just making you more stressed.

[RitaMorgan]

Agree that a gain is a gain - at least she isn't losing any weight - and you have only just started to feed more often so it's bound to take a little while to have an effect.

[Zimm]

A gain is a gain OP - I wouldn't recommend using your own scales though - they are not accurate enough. You have only recently started to feed more often so it will take time to take effect. Hang in there OP - you WILL get through this, it's such a common scenario.

[peggyblackett]

Are you sure that jaundice isn't playing a part in all of this? A friends baby was very similar, it turned out that she needed some UV treatment to clear the jaundice - she was then as right as rain. Just a thought.

Hope it continues to get better :) - a gain is a gain.

[Needsomewine]

Oh yes, she was jaundiced. I and the m/w picked it up in hospital on day 2. It never really got any none of the midwives who visited were worried. However, the HV on day 13 commented that she had a tinge of jaundice. I think it has gone though...they seem to really respect your opinion on your baby's jaundice (perhaps more if dc2 or more) and she asked me what I thought...what impact will this have on her weight gain if she is jaundice?

God I am so desperate for this bf to work. In-between my 2 stressy days I have really been enjoying feeding her believe it or not!! Also when she has a bottle of formula, or expressed milk she is very sicky and hiccupy so I would like to avoid bottles if I can. She also took ages to settle last night after dh gave her a bottle. I'm really not afraid of the tiredness factor of bf but I won't be able to bear it if she continues to gain so slowly. Feel so stuck between a rock and a hard place at the moment!

[Needsomewine]

3rd sentence- it never really got any worse and none of the m/w's who visited were worried.

[LoveBeingAMummyAgain]

So has the jaundice completely gone? The fact is it makes babies sleepy. That's why ice been told not to let her go any longer than 4 hours between feeds. The mw is coming again tomorrow to check ds and if it's not gone enough he'll be having a blood test to check what's going on.

[Needsomewine]

Sorry, I went into a ramble instead then!! In my opinion the jaundice is gone but will ask the hv's opinion on wed. My dd1 was sleepy after the jaundice had gone so hence I'm not counting it as much of a factor. All the hcp's have not been worried and asked if I thought it was getting better/ worse etc. So I will ask her, maybe I will just request a blood test? Tbh, I feel like I am getting enough quantity of milk into dd most of the time but I'm just upset at the lack of weight gain. She is obviously just getting the watery c**p as the feeds are too far spaced out:(. I am going to try and feed her every 1.5 hrs today for 20-30 mins. I'm not trying to micro manage by saying the time but I obviously can't keep her going for 1 hr + if trying to feed her so often.

[tiktok]

I think it may be you are fixing on the weight more than it deserves - you are feeding responsively, not restricting feeds, and trying to ensure she feeds often and stays close to you. That's great. She is gaining, and a sensible thing would be to have her weighed by the midwife/HV in a few days to see that your change of feeding freq. is having the right effect.

Thereafter, all should be fine :)

[tiktok]

All milk is good and nourishing - the more watery stuff is also good and nourishing! Volume of milk is what drives weight gain and milk production - don't be sucked into the totally erroneous 'understanding' of fore/hindmilk that deems it essential that babies 'get to the hindmilk' and must feed for X minutes to ensure it.

[Needsomewine]

Ok thanks tiktok :). Have had a reasonable day with dd though have just had to give her a bottle for the last feed as I couldn't get my milk to flow at all, cue screaming dd:( :(. This is what happened on the 2 nights I had to express for 1 feed and give her a bottle. This is because of me being stressed or something,right? Horrible. Think I need some sleep!

[Zimm]

How did your night go OP? Your goal of 1.5 hourly feeds sounds great.

[RitaMorgan]

I've never been able to express, not in over a year of breastfeeding! I think it just doesn't work for some women.

[OutnumberedSal]

Hi
My baby is now 4 months. He didn't regain his birthweight until he was 4 weeks, and would sleep up to 8 hours a night. I was advised to wake him (though he really wasn't interested) was feeding every 2 hours then expressing for 20 minutes after each feed (this then gave me mastitis) He is my third baby and the first was very similar. My boys are all perfectly healthy. The oldest is now 8 & has never had a day off school ill, and is now the average size of a 10 year old! The baby is happily cruising between 9th & 25th centile. With hindsight, it was when I relaxed, had a Health visitor who didn't weight him every 2 minutes (or so it seemed) and focussed on the fact that he was healthy, everything came together. Also, he would go up to a week without pooing, with no other side effects, and again, is fine. I feel that so long as he starts to poo a bit more regularly when he's on solids (and the signs are good so far), this is fine - he just takes what he needs and not much extra. My health visitor agrees. Really hope this reassures you. x

[Needsomewine]

Rita sorry iwasnt clear there. I have no trouble expressing lol. I was bf at 9 ish last night but couldn't get my milk to letdown after lots of attempts. Had had a stressful day with dd1 and another family member(!) which was probably the reason but in the end dd2 was getting so cross that I had to give her a bottle. I expressed again at midnight and gave her another bottle as I couldn't bear the thought of failing to letdown and being knackered in the middle of the night too. Things have been better today but I really can't afford to get stressed like that if bf is going to work. Its just one thing after another at the moment!!

Thank you for asking zimm. did manage 1.5 to 2 hrs til my 9pm disastrous feed yesterday! Had busier day today so have done every 2 to 2.5 hrs, tbh I think this is more realistic for dd, even though it's not optimal for bf. And at night, I really can't face doing anymore than 3 hourly!! Would be different if she was waking for feeds.

[tiktok]

2 to 2.5 hourly and 3 hrly at night should be ok - fighting and struggling is not :)

[Zimm]

Yes as tiktok says 2-2.5 hours is prob about average for a newborn - sounds really good. You are doing so well. Don't stress over the evening feeds - they are harder as your milk is slower - I used to have to feed DD for hours to get her full at that time. And there was loads of screaming. look at the whole day - not just the individual feeds.

You could try a hot bath in the early evening - the relaxation and break used to really help through the evening feeds and I got better let-down. Even if only 10 mins.

[RitaMorgan]

2-3 hourly is loads more than 4 hourly over a day though, so you've made huge strides in the last couple of days.

[Needsomewine]

I don't know whether to start a new thread, just so frustrated... I again failed to feed dd last night. She just wouldn't latch on properly and when she did, she didn't suck and then was screaming. This happened the night before too but I was perfectly relaxed last night so I don't think the factor was me this time. I am paranoid about my milk supply when she doesn't feed so dh had to give her a bottle (she had 3oz) and I went to express- got 4oz. This was at 3.30am. At 6.30 I woke her and brought her downstairs to feed, different setting etc etc. She again failed to feed, latched on well to start with but then I could feel her just chomping on my nipple so took her off. I didn't feel like there was that much milk there. Did I express too much in the night? Anyway, I again got dh to feed her- she didn't seem that hungry. She had 2oz and I then expressed 2oz.

Am so frustrated now, we had such a fab day yesterday. She fed regularly and well and I approached the failed feed confident, relaxed and had a hungry baby. Just so hard:(

[tiktok]

:( :( needsomewine you are getting into a knot :(

Your baby is making progress and you have changed the way you feed - you're now worrying about every feed and every interaction with her and judging if it was ok or if it 'failed' and expressing in the middle of the night and looking at precise amounts.....and it is not helping, because it's the bigger picture that counts.

If you have her weighed in a couple of days, she'll be three weeks and if she is at birthweight and a bit beyond this will show you are on the right lines generally. Things are not so 'knife edge' that you need to be concerned about what happens every feed, or even every night and day, honestly.

[Needsomewine]

And I obviously had the milk there.