5 things I wish I'd known before I started breastfeeding

[twinklegreen]

just reflecting really.

What things do you wish you'd known before you had your baby?

Mine are;

1. the tingling sensation when you get a let down, as it describes in the books, can actually be quite toe-curling, and is completely normal.

2. It can take up to 7 days for your milk to come in.

3. the REAL experts in breastfeeding hold IBCLC or Breastfeeding counsellor training. Midwives and HV's often have very little training (Even sometimes if they are an infant feeding co-ordinator) and often give out incorrect or out of date information and advice. :(

4. You should try to feed your baby as soon as possible after birth, not wait until someone gives you permission. :)

5. The smell of EBF baby's poo is actually quite addictive

Anyone else?

That I would only breast feed mine for 8 and 6 weeks respectively because I got sick of:

having to wear a bra with 4 breast pads in each side all the time and never leave the house without spares
having to change my pjs and entire bedding every day as leaked milk into anything touching me every night to the extent that it was all sodden (more washing to add to the work of having a new born, great)
not being able to move faster than a quick walk, as boobs were so full all the time they hurt
being unable to hug anyone as boobs were so full of milk and tender

Mind you knowing all that before hand might have stopped me breastfeeding at all, so it's probably just as well i didn't.

1. That knowing my milk was exclusively responsible (well, along with the help of many dozens of NICU doctors and nurses ) for my 2lb 2oz 26 weeker now weighing over 12 lbs would make me prouder than anything else in my whole life.

2. That I would be ridiculously sad once starting solids knowing I had smelled my last ever exclusive BM poo .

3. That I'm another one whose milk does not freeze (which was galling since we had gallons upon gallons in the freezer).

4. That combining expressing with returning to work would be eminently manageable. Thereby enabling me to continue BF and eating like it was going out of fashion. Not necessarily in that order.

5. That not all babies feed for hours. From the day he came home from NICU mine has fed for 5 minutes tops, every 2 hours or so. No, letting him get really hungry doesn't help. No, I don't think a bottle of formula to make him last longer would help .

6. That co-sleeping was not the preserve of mad middle class hippies who call their children Tarquin and Rainbow but is in fact eminently sensible. And indeed wonderful .

7. That seeing the side eye my son throws me as he chomps away happily would make me want to burst with love

Couldn't stop at 5!

That going away for a weekend five weeks ago would fuck it all up

1. that although I could hardly eat when pg I would eat everthibg in sight when bf

2. that you can never have too many washable breastpads

3. that it gives you boobs lie you've got breast implants when engorged

4. that also when you have very full boobs and baby comes off the milk can still be shooting out

5. that although you feel ready to stop and don't want dd to be upset, when she seems to hardly notice it makes you wonder why you bothered

6. that I would able to tell the time by the let down tingle in my boobs!

1. how fiercely proud and defensive of breastfeeding I would become - I knew I wanted to breastfeed but wasn't prepared to feel so strongly about it, and that it would affect how much maternity leave I wanted to take
2. how when they are a bit bigger and suddenly pull away from your boob, scrunch their faces up and grin then pop back on it makes all the exhaustion worthwhile and you burst into floods of happy tears. In the middle of Costa...
3. how everyone pats you on the back for doing such an amazing thing at first, and how quickly that changes to thinking you're a bit weird and it's time to start bottles/solids/cramming for SATS. And my little one isn't even 5 months yet!
4. that button up shirts really aren't that practical, and that tops that fit at 6 months pregnant won't do up over my boobs now.
5. that feeding to sleep, comfort sucking, using me as a dummy (!), etc. are all natural and normal and are not danger signs of an evil manipulative baby who is trying to take advantage!

1. it doesn't always hurt, even at first. If it does, get help.
2. feeding lying down can be a lot more comfortable if you've just had a CSection
3. cluster feeding is normal
4. feeding for just 5 mins is also normal and don't necessarily mean your baby is 'snacking', just that they've become very efficient feeders.
5. if you want your baby to ever accept a bottle than introduce one asap, and give one every day, otherwise it can become a battle that you may NEVER win!!!

I would also add - when your pregnant read up on tips on how to breastfeed discreetly, and bear in mind that you may need to buy new clothes that are easy to breastfeed in. For some reason I hadn't considered this and thought I'd be back in my dresses the summer after DD was born, but it's impossible to breastfed discreetly in most dresses

Also find out where all the feeding rooms, changing rooms and breastfeeding friendly places are in your area, so you feel confident when you go out and about with your baby for the first few times.

That if you have any kind of deep crack in the nipple it is not a good idea to let it air dry. You need to cover in jelonet and keep it moist or it will just keep on cracking further every time you latch on.

everything else has already been covered

I'd say: don't listen to anyone's 'advice' or opinion who hasn't breastfed themselves! I lost count of the number of times a family friend advised me to get my baby used to a bottle because 'it's so much easier when out in public' because she was embarrassed about me bf'ing in public. grrr. Also, loads of people got a 'concerned' look when learning my ds didn't sleep through the night at 7/8/9/10 months, and said 'he's obviously not getting enough goodness from you' - again advising bottle feeds. And I hate it so much when people say 'the thing about bfing is, you don't know how much goodness they're getting'... to which I replied, in the end, 'the thing about bottle feeding is, you don't know how good formula is for them... probably not very good' - tbh my feelings aren't that strong against formula, but it just wound me up, the amount of times people said the last comment!

Only one thing really. I knew nothing about babies when DD1 was born and so was delighted when she slept through for her first two nights. Well, you hear a lot about how wonderful it is when they sleep through don't you?!

We ended up in hospital with a non-latching baby who had lost 25% of her body weight. If only someone had told me that you have to wake them up if they go to long between feeds. Still, our rough start meant I got very determined and went on to breastfeed her for 5 years.

ps haha, love your point (5) SnarkHunt - I found it funny in the end that people hint that baby's who use you as a dummy are doing it to be evil! also re feeding to sleep: I didn't admit to this for ages - I felt so pressured that I was doing something 'weak' by 'allowing' my baby to fall asleep on the boob - what are you supposed to do? pull him off when he starts to look sleepy!?!?

1: That nipple shields are amazing & probably saved my breast feeding experience in the early weeks.

2: That health professionals should know how to diagnose tongue tie & offer a quick referral to sort it but sadly many don't.

3: that you can not compare BF babies to a FF baby. Yes the rest of my antenatal groups babies were all sleeping through by 12 weeks, but they were FF.

4: that let down can be quite an unpleasant sensation.

5: that watching your baby breastfeed is the most wonderful thing ever.

• That my DD would take to BFing so easily, and so would I !

• That just because you can BF in front of others/ anywhere doesn't mean you have to. I think I might have preferred to retire to room with new baby rather than feed in front of FIL and his wife. Especially when she kept trying to encourage me to leave longer between feeds Arghh ! - Especially when it was a completely new thing for me and DD. She should have said ^ Bloody well done !
  Isn't it all going well ! ^

• Little, and especially often, seems to work well and fend off many problems

• If things go well, It might go on for a long time !

1. That once DS grew a bigger mouth, things would be sooo much easier & less painful!
2. That seeing him form little fat rolls on his arms, legs, chin & seeing his belly grow as well as finding out how much he has put on would fill me with such a fantastic sense of achievement (he was born 5lb 8oz & very skinny!)
3. That 'old-schoolers' (including my DNana) can be quite negative about bf'ing "he's using you as a dummy, you'll spoil him" .etc
4. That feeding in public would become so easy so quickly & (most) people don't look at your with complete horror, some even smile at you in a sort of admirable type of way?
5. That DS would sometimes not want to feed but lick / play / nuzzle / mess with my nipple - his new favourite trick is shaking his head from side to side rubbing my nippled with his lips before letting out a big smile (almost 7w) & this would melt my heart everytime!

That breast size has no effect on milk production. I couldn't find nursing bras small enough and yet I had enough milk for triplets (not that I had triplets).
The leaking. I would have to lean over the bath and just..spray.
That it's BF babies don't always like to use a bottle or a cup or anything else. I gave up trying and saved all the hassle of expressing.
I loved the let down sensation.
That weeks after you have BF for the last time you will be in a meeting and think about the baby and you will let down and leak into your cream silk blouse.

1. That I could go back to exclusive breastfeeding even though I supplemented with FF for the first 4 weeks.

1. That fenugreek seeds work like a miracle for a dwindled milk supply.

1. That not everyone experiences a tingling let down sensation

1. That the fact that my breast milk was coming out in drops instead of shooting out, did not mean that I am not producing enough milk.

1. That some babies need to be fed every half an hour or so for the first few weeks and that does not mean that it's time to supplement with FF (as long as the baby is gaining weight).

1. That inspite of feeling numbingly difficult and painful in the beginning, BF would soon become a second nature to me and the baby

1. That BF may not feel like the most natural thing. For most, it's an acquired skill.

That despite how hard I found it at the beginning (chanting just one more feed before I give up each feed!) i would still be feeding him now at 11.5 months old.
It got easier(less painfull) at about 8 weeks and felt natural by about 12 and though he had supplementary bottles from 2 weeks I think overall all things considered we did ok

I wish I'd known that your milk 'coming in' can mean that you will drench your clothing, baby, bedding, furniture, husband and anyone else in the vicinity every time you move for weeks on end. That was quite a shock to me. And to DH.

That it will get better.

That when it gets better, it is veeeerrry relaxing.

To ignore just about everybody's 'advice' on breastfeeding, including those helpful souls who told me I was too small to breastfeed (Well, if I'm big enough to get pregnant...)

I wish I'd bought nicer nursing bras and clothes. I felt very unattractive for many months.

You don't always lose weight breastfeeding. I saw on another thread that you're either a lucky cow, who loses all their weight through feeding, or a dairy cow, who either keeps the weight on or puts on weight to make milk. Unfortunately, I am the latter, and utterly depressed about my body :( it's bloody hard work to lose even a pound. I didn't know this was also normal, so I hope this helps someone else know they're not a freak!

when your milk first comes in you can feel quite feverish and flu like symptoms and this does not mean you need anti biotics!

Don't be afraid to kick up a fuss to get the help you need. I wish I had before it was too late :(

However much you can express bears no relation to how much milk the baby is getting.

If you don't leak or get rock-hard breasts, it doesn't mean you are not making enough milk.

(Have never leaked, EBF until 6 mths, still going at 1 year)

I wish I'd known that something supposedly as natural as breastfeeding, is actually, quite tricky and a bit of a skill to master.

And that tongue tie should be checked for at birth by someone who knows what they're doing. [We went through 12 weeks of difficult bf before a IBCLC discovered DD's 60% tongue tie].

And that sniping a tied tongue is a very simple, easy procedure, contrary to what a consultant paediatric surgeon says. [Ours was done by the lovely Ann Dobson, who I would thoroughly recommend].

H&M do the best and cheap nursing tops - buy them when you see them!

DD does not need feeding all the time, and that she doesn't particulary like to comfort nurse (although that may be because for the first 12 weeks she was tongue tied!).

And lastly, its simply amazing when its going well.

1. To put Kamillosan on my nipples as a preventative measure before they got cracked.

1. That it can hurt for ages even when your baby's latching on fine - anybody else have sore breasts for the first 8 weeks?

1. That using nipple shields doesn't necessarily mean your baby will forget how to suckle at the breast and they might be all that stands between you and insanity, especially if you haven't followed point 1 (you've just got to do maybe one feed in every 24 or 48 hours without them).

P.S. Kamillosan is great coz you don't have to wash it off before you breastfeed, and it's good for nappy rash too.