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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Has anyone managed to get a 13week old to take a complete feed from a cup?

32 replies

suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 08:52

Hi!

I posted a little while ago about my DS (13 weeks) who has started to refuse a bottle (he is EBF). He had a bottle of expressed milk daily since about 9 days old, but has now decided to refuse it!

I am getting very stressed out by this, and feeling slightly claustrophobic as he feeds every 2-3 hrs during the day so I feel like a prisoner.

I have had some success with a Tomme Tippee sippy cup (with a closed spout that requires sucking) and he will take about 2oz from that. But I wouldnt dare leave him with DH and just a cup.

Does anyone have any ideas/advice/ experience to share with me?

Thanks!

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Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 09:16

Forgot to say, I have a "doidy" cup also but no idea what to do with it!

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sophielouise · 10/05/2011 09:39

can't help you I'm afraid but bumping you as we are going through exactly the same problem! DD is 11 weeks and just started refusing - we've bought all the different bottle types but she's wise to it... I have even started to feel a bit annoyed with myself that I persevered so much with the breastfeeding.. because it's like I've made a rod for my own back.. don't get me wrong I do love breastfeeding - but wouldn't it be nice if someone else could put them to bed once in a while? xx good luck you're not alone! xx

Albrecht · 10/05/2011 10:19

Ok, please don't roll your eyes at me but... its much easier to change your attitude to your current situation than to change the behaviour of a tiny person who is intent on getting what they want / need.

I have been there (ds is 10 months and only just using doidy with me holding it) and honestly it is a lot of energy, time and expense and they might never take milk from elsewhere. I totally appreciate if you are returning to work it is a pressing problem. But otherwise, from my experience it was less stressful just to go with the flow.

And you can still get away. Get everything (keys, bag, shoes, every little thing) sorted. Feed baby, hand to whoever for winding, changing and gallop out of the door for 2 hours. Around 4 months they can be distracted by someone very fun for a bit longer between feeds.

Hope this doesn't sound TOO patronising but this stage will pass.

Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 10:20

That is EXACTLY how I feel! Nobody told me that by breastfeeding I could be 'trapping' myself like this. I never realised that I might not be able to stop when I wanted.

Like I said, I have had some success with the tommee tippee cup< and I intend to give that everyday at one feed, increasing the amount each time, so that maybe that could be a bottle alternative. I will keep you posted!

For what its worth my HV advised me to have a 'bottle break' as DS has started getting upset by it, so we are going to leave it a week and then have DH try again. Again, I will let u know how it goes.

Would LOVE to hear from anyone with experience of giving an entire feed with a cup!

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Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 10:21

I appreciate the advice albrecht but I am returning to work in 10 weeks time, and I woulod like to know that DS will not starve while I am away! This is really stressing me out, so much that Im finding it hard to eat and sleep :-(

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cobweb1979 · 10/05/2011 10:39

I'd like to think (I don't have the same problem, but I have to stop expressing and DS isn't very enthusiastic about drinking formula so I'm a bit worried) that if a babe was REALLY hungry they will feed. But I may just be kidding myself...

Albrecht · 10/05/2011 10:52

I'm sorry to hear you are so stressed. Sad

I know it sounds trite but 10 weeks is still a long time and he will be so different by then.

Hope you can use the week off trying to relax. I'm sure I have read on here of people who had similar situations that worked out so hopefully someone with some positive experience will be along soon.

flowerfairy · 10/05/2011 12:21

also in a similar position suzym. 11 wko won't feed from a bottle and am returning to work in approximately 8-9 weeks. Trying not to stress. DH is trying to persevere at giving abottle. Ds did it straight away from about 6 weeks but dd is far more fussy and am looking at cups that would be suitable to try. would also like to hear some positive stories about cup feeding.

Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 13:03

flowerfairy how many times is your DH offering bottles? I would really like to hear a success story!

MY DS took a bottle every day for the first 2 1/2 mnths, I am so frustrated!

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flowerfairy · 10/05/2011 14:12

Just trying once a day atm. Although no success as yet, she was giggling and smiling the last time he tried which was some improvement from the full scale screaming that went on before. He has also banished me from the room completely which i find hard when she starts screaming. Our big problem is that she cluster feeds from about 4-5pm til 8pm and then sleeps all night so we find it harder to time it right in the week than at the weekends.

anonMum2 · 10/05/2011 15:25

Suzy - We don't have any issues with bottlefeeding, but thought I'd share about which cup worked best for DS1. Born Free trainer cups worked a treat for DS1. At 4 months, DS1 couldn't drink from any other cups claiming to be for 4+ months, but he drank 8oz no problem from the born free trainer cup(it's advertised for 6+ months). by 6 months, he was completely weaned off his dr brown bottles and only using trainer cups, 12months and he was using open top cups. Thumbs up for Born Free but we'll see how it goes with DS2. :)

Maybe give that a go in a couple of weeks time when your DS is closer to 4 months old?

TittyBojangles · 10/05/2011 16:57

And remember the quantities your LO will need for each feed is not as much as they'd need if they were ff (probably stating the obvious here). But if your DS takes 2 oz from a cup that sounds great, you won't be needing to get him to take LOADS more than that, there is a calculator thingumy on kellymom to work out roughly how much for each feed, but don't stress about getting 8oz into him, that would be a LOT for a bf baby. I know how worrying this all is, but try your best to enjoy your DS for the time you have left on mat leave, it really will all work out in the end and you'll look back on this time wondering why you worried so much. I'm not trying to belittle your worries at all, I really do know where you are coming from.

PenguinArmy · 10/05/2011 17:03

DD had a sippy cup from 4 months as she went through a fussy stage with bottles ( I was back at work at this point). From 6 months, if your up for some short term reverse cycling they can do without milk during the day if needs be.

Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 17:32

anonmum thank you that is so reassuring, will have a look online for one of those cups! Its just a relief to know that I can give a full feed in a cup if need be.

I know that 10 weeks is still a long time, but for some reason I feel like the longer I leave it the harder it will be. It is also turing into an unhealthy obsession and I have to stop myself from shoving the bottle in his mouth at every opportunity!

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anonMum2 · 10/05/2011 18:59

suzy - Should've said if your DS is as greedy as my DS1 and you want to try born free, you might need to purchase the 9oz trainer cup and use the soft spouts on them as they are interchangeable. If that fails(fingers crossed it doesn't), tommee tippee first cups are pretty good too. I've got a video of DS1 drinking 5oz of milk from it during one of his meals at 6 months so that's pretty good I guess.

PenguinArmy · 10/05/2011 19:11

I would also like to point out that they often need less than we think. 3oz is a meal if going 2-3 hourly. It's also normal for babies once they get a bit older to take enough just to satiate themselves as they would prefer mum.

When I went back to work I got in a right state the weeks before stressing about it. I was planning from the moment the baby was born, going back at 4 months felt like I had be sure. At 2-3 months DD turned into an incredibly fussy eater (we had the nursing strikes as well), but honestly 10 weeks is LOADS of time and they do change so much. DD was a different baby when I went back and actually fed better once I returned. I wish I had enjoyed the mat leave more instead of planning for things that didn't require that much thinking about.

I hope some of this helps

Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 19:17

Brilliant, thank you so much! I am deffo going to continue with the cup so that at least there is an alternative if the bottle plan doesnt work. Surely as he gets older, more will go down his throat and less down his front!

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Original poster
suzym1984 · 10/05/2011 19:20

Yes penguinarmy thats does help, thank you! I knwo what you mean about wasting my maternity leave worrying, but at the same time I cant relax until I know that he will be ok. Also, I would love the option of leaving him with someone for the day (sorry if that sounds selfish) :-)

Did your DD take all milk feeds from a sippy cup when you went back to work, or did you eventually get her on a bottle?

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PenguinArmy · 10/05/2011 19:43

She mixed (alternated I think) and then at 7 months she only had 1 3oz meal which at the end was a bottle. She over the fussy bottle stage.

We never moved up from the newborn sized teat for milk. Have you looked up the 'how to bottle feed the BF baby' on kellymom. Might be some little things in there that might help.

anonMum2 · 11/05/2011 09:14

Just had time to read the other posts, yes, I also think 8oz in a cup or bottle, is extravagant so please don't have that expectation because I'm like this, I expect the same thing to happen with my children if someone else says so. DS1 was a FF baby and extremely greedy so I'm talking about a very unusual baby that I had. My BF DS2 is completely different, still on size1 teat and usually only has around 5oz per feed. So I'm guessing your DS would probably take a lot less to start off with. I do hope you get a nice day out before you get back to work, and nothing worse than worrying about how your baby would be when you're nearly back at work so wishing you all the best. :)

Original poster
suzym1984 · 11/05/2011 12:03

penguinarmy thank you, I had a look on Kellymom and it was very useful, especially the videos about cup feeding.

anonmum thank you for your support. I suppose that I might be having high expectations of how much DS will take, and I suppose that if he gets enough from a cup to take the edge off til I get back, then thats progress!

If anyone is interested my new tactic for bottles is to let DS play with an empty bottle (as everything he plays with goes in his mouth). He has been chewing and sucking a bottle teat this morning without getting distressed at all, in fact he seems to enjoy it! Maybe one day he will suddenly accept a bottle again (fingers crossed!)

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cocoachannel · 11/05/2011 16:46

I'm another one with a bottle refuser, who needs to get back to work soon.

I thought I'd cracked it with the NUK bottle, but DD (10 weeks) then started projectile vomiting anything she took from it. The flow is soooo fast.

As a last (expensive) throw of the dice I have just ordered the Medela Special Needs bottle. It should arrive tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes!

Suzy- great idea re. playing with the bottle. Will try it when DD is a bit older if still no joy.

Original poster
suzym1984 · 13/05/2011 11:32

Well, tonight's the night that we are trying the bottle again. He has spent a few days playing with it, and will happily suck away with no milk inside.

Wish me luck!

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cocoachannel · 13/05/2011 13:26

Good luck Suzy!!

Definite progress with the Medela. She didn't actually take much milk, but she didn't scream...

Original poster
suzym1984 · 13/05/2011 13:49

Thanks! and no screaming is deffo progress!

I am determined to get him to take a bottle, but hate the thought that it might mean leaving him to cry :-(

I will let you know how we get on tonight.

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