Yesterday I was in the same room as several mothers who nurse their school aged children

[Babieseverywhere]

This was the annual LLL social coffee morning for nursing mothers of children over 4 years old !
It was so nice to discuss the good and bad points about nursing older children. :D

Roll on next year :)

Activate, it is true that in traditional (pre-industrial or even agricultural) human cultures where children are breastfed for several years and carried by their mothers the "natural" gap between children is more like 3/4/5 years. Breastfeeding is less likely to be effective as a long term contraceptive in our culture as we are less likely to carry our babies and toddlers most of the time with constant access to the breast, sleeping with them and feeding throughout the night.

My periods returned when I stopped breastfeeding during the night when my ds was 6 months old - something I worked on rather than him doing naturally to be honest

I haven't set an upper age limit because I trust them to self-wean.They lose the ability to suckle at about 7 or so anyway.
If DS2 weaned ttomorrow I'd be perfectly happy. DD too but she still nurses all day and through the night too so don't think that will be happening soon

yes tiktok (should I include a FFS too - not sure what makes people revered around here)

I am happy that you have clarified that amenorrhea is an important part of the contraception of breastfeeding in the early post-natal months

I still do not care how long anyone chooses to breastfeed for - purely a personal decision as far as I can see - why you chose to call me ignorant for that is beyond me - but you obviously know best in all things

At some point the child won't want to breastfeed anymore anyway, and I think once they have adult teeth it's almost impossible to suckle.

Any family history expert will tell you, that children start appearing just before or after a couple's wedding and you would expect births every two years until the mother died or entered the menopause.

As I breastfeed on request, my period only come back after 16 months. Which is why my children are two years apart. But I agree in thr western world it wouldn't be sensible to depends on just breastfeeding as protection, we have much better birth control.

that's an interesting point. None of my DC are that age yet but DS1 who is still regards breasts as there for feeding babies. Mummies have big ones Daddies have small ones.
It will be interesting to see. However we are a) a very open, wander around naked 1 bathroom type family and b) we haven't got TV so not sure if the lack of outside influence from that will affect it.

and 'admitting' to school mates - it would proably just be such a normal unthinking thing that they would think to mention iyswim

I read an interesting article a while ago by a British (or American?) woman who went to live in Mongolia, which has a very strong breastfeeding culture. I think she said children tended to self-wean when they started school at 5 or 6 (iirc) as it was seen as something for little kids and there was some teasing from other children. One girl she mentioned lived very rurally and only stopped when she started school at 9 and realised other kids had stopped a couple of years ago.

Sure. And there are lots of 6/7/8 year olds who are not dry at night ... there are lots of 6/7/8 year olds boys who demand hugs and kisses from Mum ... there are lots of 6/7/8 year olds who love their stuffed toys. All things they don't admit to schoolmates. And?

Breastfeeding in the Land of Genghis Khan

solooovely, Ironically I went to the group yesterday, as I am working on my own attitude about nursing older children and I'm doing it.

I found the other women satisfied with their decision to let their children self wean. Then there was me, worrying that my DD1 would never wean.

I think for other people, nursing their own child at any age the parent and child agreed is acceptable.

However when it comes to my own family, I am still trying to find our best feeding path and the honest answer is I'm not sure what my upper limit is. But those ladies yesterday were very supportive and non judgemental and I'm very lucky to have met them.

activate surely you can't be insulting MNers intelligence by suggesting people use BF as a 100% tool for contraception.

OP was posting about something that made her happy, not in the AIBU and you and others feel the need to come on here and try to make her bad about it and a freak.

Please just go away. If you have nothing nice to say...

Oh, and although my DS1 (9) is grossed out by sexual stuff in movies/tv (e.g. snogging), he doesn't really say anything about casual parental nudity. I'm not sure he sees nudity as sexual, iyswim.

It's strange, isn't it, in that I am totally pro BF-ing (exclusively BF both my DDs until they were 7 months but then stopped when I went back to work), and would be really upset if I couldn't breastfeed, and know all the benefits, and get my boobs out to feed DD(s) whenever, where ever (rugby pitch sidelines, TopShop, christening, park, PIL living room, really, ANYwhere as I think it is totally normal and natural and the Right Thing to do (if you want to) and shouldn't be judged by anyone because that's what boobs are for and it's ridiculous that people are funny about it because they are not just used for sex (and is not their primary function...)

But....

7? Really? When they self wean? That's just too far IMO. I really don't know why I feel that way, based on the above, but I can't get my head around it. TBH I kind of feel a bit funny seeing a toddler that can talk BF-ing.

I realise I am the weird one, not the extended BF-ers, because based on my feelings of BF in general, I shouldn't be so silly about them being older.

But I am.

Hmmm.

RitaMorgan-she was Canadian .

The contraceptive effect of breastfeeding freely on request day and night is described here: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lactational_amenorrhea_method, ecological breast feeding is the most effective. As tiktok stated further up, if women are not overnourished, menses return later, around 3 years postpartum, resulting in a four year gap.

I'm clearly overnourished as my period returned 16 weeks postpartum .

Which cultures? I need specifics.

I have worked a little in other countries and have never seen children being breastfed (rather than babies or toddlers)- there are too many other factors, the amount of work a mother must do (preparing food, washing clothes etc) to BF more than just the youngest as well as the physical toll where nutrition isn't great.

Just wondering

Look, if this really isn't meant to be a debate, then I'll get my coat, and as I have already said, I know I am the weird one, not the other way around... but.

Would you (extended BF-ers) BF a 15 year old? Let's assume adult teeth don't get in the way, and they can still suckle, and they want to do it... would you think it was ok and "normal" for you, the kid and your family to continue BF-ing at 15? And if not, why not?

Boobz - you feel that way because breastfeeding/weaning are cultural constructs and you live in a culture that sees breastfeeding beyond infancy as abnormal.

leroymerlin - there's an interesting article about breastfeeding in Mongolia a few posts up.

Boobz - I just don't believe my children will be BF at that point, same as they won't be in my bed at that point. All the evidence points towards them being unable to BF beyond a certain age (interestingly around the age that the human immune system matures) soo I think it's probably a moot point. To many ifs.

Maryz, sorry, I didn't mean to be aggressive, I more meant 'And?' in a shrugging, "hey, kids have things they hide from their friends" sort of way.

There's some evidence, in the fact that most humans (i.e. everyone but Western Europeans) become less good at digesting lactose around the age of 7. Of course, these days, very few people bf to 7.

Yeah, I see that. I guess I know we're all conditioned, at the bottom of things.

But would you feel weird BF-ing a 15 year old?