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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

How do you feel about how you were fed as a baby?

143 replies

LoisLame · 15/02/2011 12:36

As the title says really.

When I was trying to get bf going with DD, we had a pretty bad time of it. She was crying for a feed. I was crying in anticipation of the pain when she would latch on. DH was crying because everyone else was crying. And he would always say to me "DD will appreciate you going through all this to give her the best start you can". DD is 6mths old now and still breastfeeding (mix fed with Infatrini) and I keep thinking about what he used to say.

So if you were breastfed, do you appreciate what your mum did for you? Are you grateful? If you were formula fed, do you resent it? Or does it really not make a blind bit of difference now you're all grown up?

I was formula fed in the early 80s. I'm thankful my mum fed me full stop - no matter what method she used. The only gripe I have about it is that she doesn't understand why I've gone through so much to carry on breastfeeding. I don't know what the bf/ff debate situation was like back then. I just really wish she could see it through my eyes.

OP posts:

MoonUnitAlpha · 15/02/2011 23:12

I think FF has been shown to be linked to a propensity towards obesity later though? Something to do with the way fat cells are laid down in infancy.

KaraStarbuckThrace · 15/02/2011 23:15

Funny - it is not always that simple.
FF babies are more likely to be obese because they tends to be fed to a schedule, and it is easier to overfeed a ff baby as you can override their natural instinct to know when they are full.
I don't think this is completely to blame for my weight problem, I have other pyschologcial issues going on which was to do with the fact I was never allowed to leave the table until I cleared my plate and it is something now that I struggle to overcome, plus my nan used to overfeed me and my cousin and we both have weight issues.
I do take full responsibility for what I eat but I also recognise that I need to get some help with regards to the compulsive eating issues I have.
And strangely enough I don't blame my mum, in those days when people had to watch every penny, nobody wanted to see food wasted.

LilQueenie · 15/02/2011 23:17

I was FF and find it difficult to put on weight. My sister was Bf at first then FF later on. She cant put on weight easily either but she did come down with a lot of illness whearas I didnt! I have no problems with the way I was fed and to be honest any adult holding resentment agaisnt a parent for thier feeding choice needs to look at other areas of thier life to see they put it all down to that one thing.

sleepywombat · 15/02/2011 23:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MummyBerryJuice · 16/02/2011 08:29

I was born in 1980 and was bf for 11 months when I self-weaned. Although my mum was about 12 weeks pregnant with my brother at the time nap that would probably be the reason why.

I am glad the bf me as ithas been shown that women who were bf are more likely to succeed in bfing their own DC.

Quenelle · 16/02/2011 14:41

I was FF in 1969. I have no view on it.

Quenelle · 16/02/2011 14:42

And I BF my son for 15 months so no correlation there.

Original poster

LoisLame · 16/02/2011 15:51

It's been very interesting reading all these replies. It's just made me think that yes, my DD probably won't give a chuff how I've fed her but if she goes on to bf a child of her own, I'll be right behind her with all the support I can offer. It would be the same if she chooses to ff too though. Now I want to round up all the mums who feel guilty and like they have failed by not bf, show them this thread and remind them that it might seem like the most significant thing in the world now, but in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't matter!

It's also reminded me that the most important things I can give to my DD are unconditional love and confidence and that every day I must tell her how much I love her and how she is beautiful and perfect just as she is like I wish my mum would have said to me just once

OP posts:

HettyAmaretti · 16/02/2011 15:55

I was BF for 2 1/2 years and am eternally grateful.

reallytired · 16/02/2011 16:07

I was formula fed in 1975. My mother was desperate to breastfeed, but given no help in hospital. She managed to breastfeed my brother for 13 months.

I have no view on my mother choosing to formula feed. She is a loving mother who did her best for me. You can only do your best in life.

My brother had better health as a child, but threw away all the health benefits of breastfeeding by smoking.

I have breastfeed both my children to 33 months and 21 months respectively. I don't expect them to show gratitude to me. They will have their own children one day.

Reesie · 16/02/2011 21:26

My mum ff me from birth (1970's) but I apparently was a 'hungry baby' so went straight to gold top cows milk at 3 weeks

My mum truly believes that formula/cows milk is equal to breastmilk so would not have considered that she would have done anything that may have been a disadvantage to me. She said that she didn't bf as she couldn't bear the thought of a baby feeding from her breasts!

I bf dd1 for 14 months and dd2 is still bf at 22months - I think she feels that breastfeeding is a 'faff' but wouldn't dare say so to me!

I'm quite interested in nutrition and follow a very healthy diet so from that perspective I would have liked to have been breastfed but I wouldn't have said that to my lovely mum who is has been truly wonderful to me all through my life and is an amazing grandmother to my dd's.

petisa · 16/02/2011 21:34

I was ff and don't care, but I wish I could have eaten more fresh fruit and veg and less stuff out of a tin.

petisa · 16/02/2011 21:36

My mum also smoked while pregnant with me, and I actually don't have any strong feelings about that either. I just think she didn't know about the harmful effects and it was what all her friends were doing.

petisa · 16/02/2011 21:39

Sorry I keep posting but I have ff dd1 and bf dd2 and I wouldn't really expect them to have much of an opinion on that when they are older. Both are healthy. I suppose it will be nice to be able to offer some outdated, unwanted advice to them if they become mums, no matter which feeding method they choose

Ripeberry · 16/02/2011 21:42

I mum was not allowed to breastfeed as she was taking lots of medication for bi-polar disorder and epilepsy.
And anyway, she had to go away for a year and I was brought up by my granny in my first year of life and then after my brother was born 3yrs later, off she went again for a year and he went to live with the other grandparents.
I think it was not until I was 3yrs old that we had a 'proper' familly.

Anyway, I digress, my parents could not afford formula, so we were both fed on watered down evaporated milk! And weaned as soon as possible (4 months old).

We were both very skinny as children, but now we've hit middle age, we've put on the weight a bit.

Indith · 16/02/2011 21:45

I don't have feelings about it regarding myself but I do feel for my mother. She had terrible advice and too many people all trying to support her and telling her different things. My sister was pretty much starved for a few weeks as she was desperately trying to bf on a strict timetable and of course her milk dwindled and she ff. With me her confidence was so low that the instant I showed signs of wanting feeding when it hadn't been that long since my last feed she reached for the bottles.

I feel for the young woman that she was, trying to feed us but feeling as though she couldn't. I have seen her come to realise how bf works as I have fed my children and realise that she could probably have fed us had she been free to feed on demand. But while I might feel sorry for that young woman I have no particular feelings for myself at being ff, I was fed, I was taken care of and I was loved and that is the most important thing.

Teapot13 · 17/02/2011 08:41

My mother BF me in the 70's for 19 months. I'm proud of that -- of her, I guess.

My grandmother was very against BF. She had absolutely no money whatsoever but she cornered my mother and said, "If it's the money, let me see what I can do." I always knew this but didn't appreciate how hard it must have been for my mom until I struggled to BF. She helped me so much. Not only did her mother not help her, but she actively discouraged her. Ironically, my mother held back on advice because she thought that what she did was probably "old-fashioned," and I carried on doing what the BF counsellor told me. I now realize that what she said was daft (not feeding more than every 3 hours because of foremilk -- and this was last year!). But everything my mother said was right.

I guess this is more than what the OP was asking -- but it's why I'm proud of my mother for BFing me.

Metalhead · 17/02/2011 16:02

I always assumed I was bf, though don't ask me why I made that assumption... apparently my mum gave up and switched to ff after 2 weeks!

I really don't give a monkey's, I don't feel like I missed out or was disadvantaged in any way, alyhough my mum now says she's very proud of me for bfing my 8 month old DC.

I'd be very surprised if any child actually resents their parents for choosing to either bf or ff!

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