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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Feeling terrible about mixed feeding - wanting to go back to bfing?

57 replies

planner26 · 12/12/2010 20:34

Hi, DD is now 12 days old. We started off bfing, which I was really keen on from the off. We left hospital after a day, with the midwives telling me she was feeding fine only to end up with severely cracked and bleeding nipples 4 days later - the pain was excruciating.

The midwives at the hospital never actually watched the latch, just my position. My midwife visited me at home for day 5 visit and watched the latch, confirming she wasn't latching on properly (just right onto my nipple). She told me how to do it, but by that point I was so exhausted (bad latch = feeding lasting about 50mins and having to go again 30 mins later) and still hadn't properly recovered from a 30 hour labour so I started to use my electric pump to express.

DP was not massively supportive of my bfing, and when I had problems he was very quick to go out and buy formula (also I guess all he saw was me so tired and in pain). I have been so upset since, crying every day (I kno hormones all over the place) at feeling like I've let down DD and disappointed/ like a bad mother.

I have been expressing about 8 times a day since, my nipples have nearly healed and I am thinking I would like to give bfing another go. Do you think this would be possible? I am expressing about 3 oz each time. Does anyone have any advice for me?

Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
planner26 · 14/12/2010 21:02

Thank you again - encouraging about mixing during the same day (I'll try combining and not wasting).

Disappointed today - the Coordinator could not make it out in the end, so I kept DD1 hungry and awake all morning for nothing. She encouraged me to have a go myself, but I'm so wary about it after last time I want to make sure I get it right. She's coming tomorrow lunch time instead so fingers crossed it will go well.

I will keep you updated!

OP posts:
marzipananimal · 15/12/2010 07:08

That's a shame, really hope it goes well today :)

lowrib · 15/12/2010 09:20

Keeping my fingers crossed for you Smile
Let us know how it goes.

Original poster
planner26 · 16/12/2010 09:16

Just a quick one - she is due a feed! The Coordinator came out yesterday and was so helpful and supportive. We got her latch right and I've been feeding her every 2.5 hours since, so think my milk production had not been affected too much. I feel so much calmer and happier - am hoping it lasts! She seems a lot more contented too.

Only problem is that the latch is far better on one breast than the other. The one that got into a right mess is still 'pinching' with pain a little - but nothing like it was. Do you think this is the start of the problem again, or just normal because still recovering from cracks/ bleeding?

Many thanks

OP posts:
marzipananimal · 16/12/2010 12:48

That's great :)
It's quite normal to find one side easier than the other - does the pain last through the whole feed or is it just there at the start? May well just be that you're healing but make sure you take her off if you think the latch isn't quite right and keep trying until you've got the best latch you can

Original poster
planner26 · 16/12/2010 20:50

Yes, the pain lasts through the whole feed. I am getting really disheartened again after a really good day and night. She is wanting to go on every half hour and pain is back in both nipples. Am seeing HV tomorrow so hopefully she will be able to help.

OP posts:
PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 17/12/2010 00:55

Planner, you have done sooooo well! You have clearly maintained a good supply and will be able to continue doing so while you get the issues with the latch sorted.

It does sound like it's an issue with the latch. Please don't fret. This can be resolved and will make such a difference to you.

I hope your HV is well-trained in breastfeeding support. Unfortunately, this is one of thesubjects that HVs aren't always too good at.

I would say to revert back to bottle-feeding expressed bm, and get yourself to a baby cafe or breastfeeding group as soon as possible. Please also phone one of he helplines that marzipanimal listed.

One more thing: is there any possibility that you may have thrush? Nothing particular may be visible on your nipples, but dd may have white on her tongue and/or on the insides of her cheeks, which lookslike milk but won't wipe off.

You really have done so well. It's hard enough work looking after a newborn, but to pump 8 x a day as well as bottlefeed, is an achievement.

Engels · 17/12/2010 01:06

Just wanted to add my support and say well done! It took me about 9 weeks to properly get the hang of breastfeeding but I did it. Ds had some formula too but mainly breastfed and exclusively bf from 5.5 months-9 months when weaning. It is totally possible and you're doing it!

Good luck :)

TruthSweet · 17/12/2010 21:28

How are things going planner26? Was the HV able to help?

AllSheepareWhite · 17/12/2010 21:39

I had this with DD and she still prefers one side now (produces more milk). MW said if latch is funny on one side you can try feeding rugby ball still by having baby lying under your arm on that side see here. Worked for me when DD was tiny until her latch got stronger and her mouth got bigger. Still bfing 18 months later.

Original poster
planner26 · 18/12/2010 14:11

Hi everyone, am still hanging in there! Nipples are a little cracked now, but not half as bad as last time. Still having a bit of pain (HV was crap - she sat at the other end of the room and said it looked fine!) but trying to concentrate on getting a good latch and smothering on the Lasinoh!

Hopefully I can keep it up til Monday morning, when there is a LaLeche support group at my local baby centre thank God!

Thank you for all your support, it means a lot esp. when don't neccessarily get it off DP (I have to play down the pain so he doesn't get annoyed!).

One question - finding it hard for DD to take much when I offer second breast, though she takes the first for around 25 mins so assuming she is having a good feed. She then goes around 2.5 hrs. Is it ok for her to just alternate breasts? Thanks

OP posts:
RubyBuckleberry · 18/12/2010 14:57

Hi Planner, great advice on here so don't need to add much. You've done so so well - really well done Grin!

Absolutely fine if DD only takes a bit of the second breast. Just start on that one next time. Going around 2.5 hours and drinking well from one and a bit breasts is just great Grin. Always offer the second, but if she doesn't want it or just has a little bit that is absolutely fine.

It sounds like you are really on the right tracks and you don't need to worry - it all sounds great Grin.

With the latch. If you shift her down towards her feet an inch or two this can help her tip her head back which can help the pinching and enable her to get a deeper latch. It is also easier for her to drink like this (imagine you are drinking from a coke can with your head tipped back). Might work. The LaLeche support group should help you here anyway. They were a huge source of genuinely helpful support when I had a cracked nipple with DS.

Well done again Smile.

Engels · 18/12/2010 17:27

Have you tried nipple shields? I did for a bit when nipples were still toughening up. Made a world of difference but I was delighted to ditch them once nipples not too painful as they are fiddly.

Some great advice on here Smile

theidsalright · 18/12/2010 19:41

going 2.5 hours between feeds is fantastic! she sounds like a contented baby!

HereMeRoar · 18/12/2010 20:53

Has anyone checked to see if your baby might have a tongue tie?

On the expressed milk, I'm not sure if you're still expressing, but maybe one way round any storage issues is simply to pool any milk expressed at one sitting and then decant it into separate bottlesor containers in 1 or 2oz lots stored separately?

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 18/12/2010 21:41

Excellent news!

2.5h between feeds is fine at this age, and an indication that she is taking as much as she needs at each feed. So 1-and-a-bit breasts at a feed is also fine. Make sure you start the next feed on the breast she fed least from at the previous feed.

If you want to - and only if you want to - you could express from the second breast and freeze the extra milk. It may be useful later, when your supply is established, if you want someone else to feed your dd for any reason.

Original poster
planner26 · 19/12/2010 10:55

Thanks - no, I am no longer expressing (actually, once later at night as I've been getting sore boobs and it helps).

Could there any reason other than the latch why nipples are still sore? Mwife says latch is fine but they are still cracked and sore. Could it just be nipples 'toughening up'? (Engels - will try the nipple shields idea, did you have sore nipples just getting used to the bfing?)

LaLeche group is not on tomorrow as there is a break for the holidays of a few weeks :( HV is coming back (hopefully we will get a bit better advice this time if I really push it!).

Thanks again.

OP posts:
pinkyp · 19/12/2010 11:44

hi planner,my baby is now 12days old and were bf. I find that one side is more painful than he other. Also ifind it painful for the first min but after that it should ease off, if it doesnt then try taking baby off and latching on again thats what i do. My nipples are a liitle sore, i was then every morning in warm water then apply avent nipple cream (the one you dont have to was off) and it seems to work. Good luck x

pinkyp · 19/12/2010 11:44

wash* not was

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 19/12/2010 11:56

The most likely reason is the latch. Do your nipples appear blanched when dd comes off? Or flattened or otherwise different-shaped to normal?

Has any HCP looked in dd's mouth to check for tongue-tie or thrush?

Do you have pain elsewhere in your breast, other than the nipple? Do you have pain between feeds?

Original poster
planner26 · 19/12/2010 12:32

Hi my nipple seems a little pointy to one side and stuck out than normal. Noone has checked dd's mouth they said they check as a 'last resort'! I will ask them tomorrow though.

I have pain in breast in between feeds very tender and sore. HV said just to use anti-inflamatories.

Bought some nipple shields on a Boots dash this am so will give them a go.

One thing I have found is sitting upright on sofa bfing doesn't hurt as much as 'upright' in bed during the night.

OP posts:
marzipananimal · 19/12/2010 12:37

That's a shame about the LLL group. Maybe someone could come round to see you to help with the latch (try NCT or Breastfeeding Network as well as LLL)? Tricky at this time of year!
Does she open her mouth nice and wide to take in more than just the nipple? That was my problem and I just had to wait until ds would open wide before putting him on even though he would get very upset and impatient (in fact he would open his mouth wide to scream and i'd put him on and that sometimes worked)
I think if the latch was right the cracks would heal although you might be a bit sore for a while as nipples can be very sensitive before they toughen up.
Well done for persevering and I hope you get the help you need :)

marzipananimal · 19/12/2010 12:44

x posts
you can check for tongue tie yourself - see here for info

Breast soreness can be normal (IME) in the first few weeks but have a look at this from kellymom about mastitis in case it's that and you need treatment

MoonUnitAlpha · 19/12/2010 14:20

Cracks that won't heal and pain between feeds can be a sign of thrush. The misshapen nipple is a latch problem though - bit slack of the HV/midwives not to check for tongue tie, that is something so fundamental! Though maybe they haven't had much breastfeeding training and aren't sure what they're looking for.

Babymithel · 19/12/2010 16:09

Congrats on your new baby, it is tricky in the beginning. Not all babies are natural breast feeders. They need lots of practise. If you want to drop the bottles, then do it. It's not down to your Hubby to dictate either way. Do what feels right for you. The baby won't starve whichever way you feed it. Bottle feeding is actually easier for babies than BF. BF takes a bit of effort on their part. Good luck with it whichever way you go. :)