Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

For every BF mum who was told " if you are doing it right it won't hurt"

44 replies

KristinaM · 14/09/2005 14:43

LIke so many of you i was told this, even though no one could tell me what the mysterious thing was that I was doing wrong. The pain eventually went about 14 weeks afer the baby was born.

I was still BF this "baby" until a few weeks ago but have stopped as it was getting extremely painful again. This time I've been told its perfectly normal as i'm 30 weeks pregnant and its "just hormonal". I wonder if hormones could be the reason why so many women find Bf painful after the birth???? No one even suggested this last time - it was "my fault"

Just a thought.......

OP posts:
alux · 14/09/2005 15:16

talk to a trained bf counsellor - ask yr midwife / hospital if they have one you can talk to or contact the nct.

kama · 14/09/2005 15:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Eaney · 14/09/2005 15:24

A BF counsellor at the hospital where I was admitted that she had had three children and the first two were fine but the third was a nightmare. SHe admitted that it was unfair of her profession to always lay the blame at the mothers feet as sometimes it was nobody's fault.

I had large nipples and baby had small mouth. Counsellor agreed this was causing a lot of the problem. I think she was so honest with me because I had already BFed one child for 8 mts and it didn'd stop hurting until about 8 weeks in. She knew I intended to keep going so there was no need in tryign to convince me that I only needed to change the position.

Original poster
KristinaM · 14/09/2005 15:56

Alux - I suspect the NCT will say the same thing.Its on the La Leche website too.Seems standard advice at this stage in pregnancy.

TBH I am happy with stopping now, though suspect my toddler would still like to feed during the night!!! He will have his chance again in 10 weeks or so.....

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 14/09/2005 15:59

KM, DS stopped feeding a couple of weeks ago now too - I'd been finding it uncomfortable for a couple of months (am 23 weeks pg now), but was happy to continue as long as he wanted - he just didn't want!

I found it painful for about the first six weeks when DS was born (he's 17mo now) and I'll be interested to see what it's like next time. Still, not that long to wait to find out!

Caligula · 14/09/2005 16:00

Eany I had the same problem as you. I wish I'd been given the same advice.

Original poster
KristinaM · 14/09/2005 16:26

HM - what a brave mummy you are!!! I found it started to get sore about 20 weeks and Ds seemed to be going off it, so i thought " oh this is it". Apparently the taste of the milk changes in pregnancy which can put off some children.

Then DS came down with chicken pox about week 25 and he started all over again. But it was really really painful by week 28 so I'm glad to have stopped now . But I suspect DS will want to give it a go again when he sees me feeding the new baby.

OP posts:
spidermama · 14/09/2005 16:41

No matter how often health professionals tell me otherwise, I really believe your nipples have to toughen up to being sucked on hard several times a day. Of course they would, surely. I've bf'ed 4 babies now and I've always had a painful period of adjustment.

berolina · 14/09/2005 18:16

I had all sorts of bf problems but ds is 4mo now and it never hurt (don't all kill me!) - nipples went only slightly sore on really mammoth feeding days.
I've since wondered whether it might be because I hardly ever wear bras and my nipples were toughened by my clothes rubbing against them.
Completely unproven and unscientific but maybe worth a try in pregnancy???

PeachyClair · 14/09/2005 19:11

I fed until fifteen months with ds3, and at times it hurt like anything! At first, then when he was teething and biting...

Well it would wouldn't it? Biting would hurt.

Original poster
KristinaM · 14/09/2005 20:02

Ouch Berolina - the thought of going bra less in pregnancy hurts more that the memory of biting / teething

OP posts:
morningpaper · 14/09/2005 20:09

I completely agree with you Kristina. When my friends have been pregnant I've warned them that whatever they do, BREASTFEEDING WILL HURT AT FIRST. It's so unfair for new mums to be crying in pain and still be told that it's because they aren't 'doing it right'. I think that's bollocks. I think that as well as nipples 'toughening up'/mother getting used to the sensation (which I found VERY unpleasant/uncomfortable) the baby also takes a while to learn the most efficient way to feed.

After breastfeeding for 18 months you could probably wrap my nipples around a tree and I wouldn't feel a thing...

Original poster
KristinaM · 14/09/2005 20:20

It just makes me angry. As far as I can tell, quite a few mums find Bf very painful for quite a while. The "experts" dont knwo why this is so they blame the mum, while offering no solution. I'm not disputing that poor positioning / latch can cause pain, just that its unfair to blame the mum if you dont know whats causing the problem.Goodness knows, we mums dont need any more blame/guilt!!!!!

I am hoping to be like Berolina next time - not bra less - pain free

OP posts:
antibes · 14/09/2005 20:23

had cabbage leave in situ after each of my babies whe feeding. toe curls r us!

Original poster
KristinaM · 14/09/2005 21:03

Oh Mp what a nice image..........

OP posts:
moondog · 14/09/2005 21:07

I don't know if the mother is 'blamed'...probably more a case of not being able to provide a solution.

I too had painful periods of adjustment with my two (other problems notwithstanding) and like spidermama says,wasn't too surprised. Newborns are bloody strong!!!

Berolina,so glad to hear the b/feeding is going well! Four months already??! Hard to believe,eh?

Rhubarb · 14/09/2005 21:11

Thank you for starting this thread! I too went through months of agony. How come the midwives and breastfeeding experts cannot agree that sometimes it just hurts? If they can't figure out why then it must be psychological - obviously!

Monstersmum · 14/09/2005 21:13

An Aussie friend of mine who had her children about 20 yrs ago said that in Oz they were told to toughen up their nipples by going topless indoors and letting the sunlight on - even indoors by a window (not necessarily to be seen by neighbours etc!) and rubbing with a SOFT baby toothbrush. In some ways it makes sense!

Roxswood · 14/09/2005 21:17

I was sore and blistered for about the first two weeks and I know it was just that the area really wasn't used to that incredibly strong sucking!
I think its right to tell Mum's to seek help if its hurting though, because often there are things you can do to help.

hunkermunker · 14/09/2005 21:18

If I went braless during pregnancy (or at any time!), I'd only be able to feed a baby using some kind of hoist, or lying the child across my feet

And KM - not brave, just wanted a bit of an extra lie down in the mornings That was the last feed DS dropped.

moondog · 14/09/2005 21:19

But iwant to know if women in less urbanised communities suffer similarly??
Do you think that they don't orif they do that they simply grin and bear it??

Roxswood · 14/09/2005 21:34

I think women in less urbanised countries generally have lots of relatives around who have all breastfed and will probably be able to offer help much like our bfing counsellors, but I'm sure they must go through the same adjustment pain that most of us have.

Eaney · 15/09/2005 13:23

Have you ever experienced a kind of depressing feeling when they first latch on that goes away as the feed continues. This happened to me, still does a little.
A friend of mine had it really bad. Like a complete mood change as soon as the let down reflex took hold.

Original poster
KristinaM · 15/09/2005 17:49

No, but I've heard some women feel anxious, sort of panicy. Maybe its these bloody hormones again!!!

OP posts:
Roxswood · 15/09/2005 19:32

I always wanted to go to sleep as soon as letdown kicked in. Now my little one is older I just find it really relaxing. Its wonderful stress relief for both of us. Days of dealing with toddler issues fade away with the lovely bfing during the night.

Swipe left for the next trending thread