Looking for some advice on breast v bottle

[ScMacBt]

I'm currently 25 weeks pregnant with 2nd dc and bottle fed first time round due to not having breastfeeding as an option. However would really like to beastfeed this time round, but all i hear is horror stories and people telling me not to do it. Does anyone want to share there experiences just to help me see both sides of the story?

I can give the opposite story, bfing has been a really wonderful thing for me. Sure it's difficult at times being the only one who can feed the baby, but those are minor inconveniences and the advantages outweigh everything.

I have this urge this time round that i need to do this and it feels right, obviously it could change closer to the time but id really like to do this.

Did you find it hard with night feeds etc?

Hi,

My DD is now 28 weeks and we are still breastfeeding. As the only person in my family to have breastfed for any length of time, I was not really encouraged to feed for so long. Don't listen to other people, do what you want to do and what is right for you and your baby.

I have a very positive breastfeeding story. I have had absolutely no problems feeding at all. No cracked nipples, no pain, no severe engorgement, no mastitus, no thrush...no issue at all. Any problems we have had have been in my head - for example, I used to keep thinking my supply was low when it was fine . No horror stories here

Breastfeeding is so convenient - you don't have to sterilise bottles and worry about making up formula. Once you get used to feeding outside, it becomes so natural and not an issue at all. I have only ever had postive experiences feeding when out and about.

I would say that the only downside to breastfeeding is that you are the only person who can feed your baby initially. In the early days your newborn may literally feed all day every day and that can be really tiring. BUT, I think that if you are aware of this and mentally prepared for it, it is fine.

Some people chose not to use bottles at all, however, I chose to introduce a bottle of expressed breastmilk to my DD when she was 6 weeks old to allow me to go out occasionally. She does not get a regular bottle, but will take an expressed bottle no problem when I am not there.

The advantages of breastfeeding outweigh the fact that you are the "main feeder" - breastmilk is the only natural food designed for your baby and it has so many health benefits. Plus, feeding your baby is the most amazing feeling in the world. I still can't believe that my DD's chubby legs are due to my milk!

My advice if your unsure...give it a go. Also, find a local bf support group and go now whilst you are pregnant. This will let you meet breastfeeding mums and you can build up a support network for when your baby is born.

Have a look here and here.

Good luck!

I'm slightly different in that my DD was prem and came home from hospital taking bottles of EBM as she couldn't yet BF. I know EBM is probably different to formula but we had to take the bottle out of the fridge and warm it before feeding DD. I found that especially at night it is so much easier to just pick up baby and BF rather than faff with bottles.
I am also a lucky lady who hasn't had any problems w cracked nipples etc. Maybe because I had a lot of help to get DD feeding, but I would say give BF a chance and if you are having issues w latch etc shout loudly for help. It really is worth it.
All the best with your baby, however you decide to feed them

Night feeds are miles easier. YOu just pick them up from where they are lying in a moses basket next to you, feed and pop back without turning the light on, or, if cosleeping (the safest way if done correctly) you just wake when they stir a bit, shuffle to where they can latch on and go back to sleep with them falling off when they fall asleep themselves.

No changing bag. You can just stick a nappy a few wipes in your handbag when you go out too.

People will always tell you horror stories, be it about breastfeeding ("My nipple was bitten off"), labour ("I was in labour for three months"), childbirth ("I had a 20th degree tear and they still needed to cut me"), the newborn time ("My baby never slept, ever"), the toddlers ("She ate the whole cat. All of it!")... You get my drift. Don't let that put you off.

Breastfeeding is best for you and best for your baby. Aside from the huge health benefits, its free, its already prepared, and breastfeeding mothers get more sleep (approx. 45mins per night).

It can have its difficulties right at the start, but then having a new baby is difficult regardless of how you're feeding!

Just make sure you ask for the support you need, get to know where the local support groups are around you, speak to your midwife and to anyone you know who is positive - avoid the negative.

I've been feeding DS for 11.5 months now. The first few weeks were knackering, but thinking about it now, I'm sure that was more to do with looking after a newborn than sorting out breastfeeding. Now, the feeding is a breeze. When he is hungry, I just undo my top and volia. When he feeds at night, I can either put him back in his bed, or I can put him in with me and sleep through the feeding. When he's been ill and off his food, its been a great way of knowing he is still getting plenty of fluid, calories and comfort, all in one go.

Good on you for deciding. This is nice.

Another zero horror story here - breast feeding just works, and I echoing Stark co-sleeping makes night feeding a complete doddle.

Stark's handbag comment also shouldn't be forgotten - no lugging round a chiller bag/bottles and thermoses/getting hot water in cafes. I just have a couple of nappies and some wipes in my bag all the time, so I can just pick the baby up and go. If he gets hungry or cranky, then just find a seat and give him a feed - it's so easy.

Slightly different story here. I have breastfed both DCs to a greater or lesser degree and have not found it easy. DS was fully bottle fed by 4 months. I found DD almost as hard as DS to begin with - she hurt me, I was exhausted, etc. etc. Many times I was forced to make the choice between continuing or going onto bottles. Every time I reached a crossroads I chose to continue, and we are still going strong at 4+ months. After my experience of mix feeding and then bottle feeding DS, even the difficulties I have experienced with b/f DD were not enough to make me want to bottle feed again.

I won't lie, the first few weeks, even months, can be very very hard. But it's so worth it in the end. Aside from the obvious health benefits for both of you, with breastfeeding:

• there is no making up feeds while baby screams
• no wastage when you misread hunger cues
• no military planning needed for a trip out
• a ready source of comfort on tap whenever it's required

The bottom line is that there is no reason whatsover not to give it a try. Expect some difficulties, even some pain, to begin with but arm yourself with the information and support to get over them. And if you find it isn't for you, you can switch or mix - and you've lost nothing by trying. And you might be lucky and find it really really quite easy.

Laughing at "she ate the whole cat ... all of it!"

Breastfeeding has been (to my surprise) fun - I feel relaxed and bonded with DD2, and it's been brilliant being 'meals on heels' i.e. knowing that however long we stayed out of the house, I had enough food whenever it was needed, at the right temperature and without it ever running out. I was reluctant to introduce solids even at 6 months because I couldn't be bothered with the faff of having to plan meals all of a sudden.

The night feeds, although sometimes frequent, have been soooooooo much better than having to get out of bed to sort out a bottle (with DD1 was frequently getting out of bed to find bottles of EBM, and I know formula - with the new guidelines about water having to be at least at 70 degrees when powder is added - takes even more time and effort to prepare than that). DD2 sleeps in a cot right next to my bed (or sometimes in bed with us) and I just latch her on and nod off again. I feel more rested, and I know that whenever DD2 needs comfort, a snack, a drink, reassurance, whatever, I can provide it within seconds.

I initially worried about comments when out and about feeding in public (hardly did it at all last time as DD1's reflux made it a nightmare) but it's been far easier than I ever imagined and I've only ever had lovely positive comments and stories from women about their time nursing their own babies.

I think the positive, trouble-free breastfeeding stories are actually really frequent but they don't get much airtime because they're not particularly dramatic or long, and often people don't want to sound like they're boasting in some way by telling them.

(I also like to spend the money that we're nominally saving on buying formula on the extra 500 calories per day of chocolate that I've convinced DH is vital to my milk supply)

I did have to spend the first 6 weeks feeding the baby pretty much nonstop. I think for most people it's more like 4, but my DS is a bit of a keen feeder. Something clicked, though, and by 8 weeks he was spacing his feeds out, and now (13 wks) he feeds maybe every 3 to 4 hours for 20 minutes.

I had some "argh I just want some time to myself!" moments, but because he's my first baby I don't know if they were breastfeeding related, or just me being in total shock about having a baby and not being able to be by myself any more (at least, not without having got someone else to hold the baby!). I think the phrase is 'babyshock'!

Now BFing is easy, and rather snuggly and nice. I love knowing that wherever we go, I can feed him/comfort him/get him to sleep. I will second (third? fourth?) the bit about night feeds - although you have to do it all, you don't have to get out of bed (or far out of bed) to do it - and that's a joy. Once I learned how to feed lying down there was no looking back!

Also, I introduced the odd bottle of expressed breast milk when DS was 4 weeks old (because I was going to have to go back to work part time at 6 weeks) and so that means that when I'm totally knackered, I can give DH a bottle and he'll do half the night feeds, while I get some solid kip in the other room - then we switch and he gets the other half of the night in the spare bed and I breastfeed DS if he wakes. That's been extra handy recently as DS has had a cold and been coughing to wake himself up, poor mite.

Sorry, rambly - but don't let 'oooh you don't want to breastfeed, you'll have to do it all yourself!' put you off. You don't have to do it all yourself after the first month and a half.

I got lots and lots of help and advice from here, I also got lots of phone numbers and groups etc ready beforehand, that helped me a lot. I think it's handy to know about things like evening clusterfeeds (when the baby wants to feed and feed for 3ish hours every night) - because if I hadn't had DH ready to walk the dog and make dinner every night for a month, it would have been harder on us all. A supportive partner is a real godsend.

Frankly, one of the nicest things ever said to me about breastfeeding was 'every breastfeed counts. Every breastfeed is great for your baby.' So yeah - even if you're not sure if you'll do more than 2 weeks (or whatever) - it's a lovely thing to have done for your little one.
:)

Yet another that had no issues.

Give it a go, some great advice on here.
Definatly read up on cluster feeding and growth spurts just so you aren't worried by long feeds.

Ask questions on here. Find support through nct/lll.

Get your older dc a box of little bits they are only allowed to play with when you are feeding the baby.

If you do decide to ff check out the guidelines for making it up incase they have changed since your older dc.

Hope it works out for you.

I bf both my children until 13 months. Had major problems with the first as she wouldn't latch on properly (I didn't put her straight on for a feed till about 2 hours after the birth, think that was the problem) so it was very painful for the first 6 weeks, saw a lactation specialist and spoke to lots of people and just stuck at it cos I was very determined to do and didn't want it to beat me! eventually at 6 weeks it stopped hurting and became a pleasure.

Second baby, I had him feeding literally within 15 minutes of coming out and had no problems at all, no pain, completely pleasurable.

Yes it is tiring cos you are the only one who can feed them, but I also found it very special that it was only me doing it (I never expressed) There is no faffing with bottles, you can stick them on to comfort them, you can do it anywhere (once you are comfortable with it)...I would highly recommend it :)

I breastfed both DDs for a year each - despite a few issues (cracked nipples with DD1, mastitis twice with DD2, toe-curling pain in the first few seconds of each feed for the first few weeks) I am definitely planning on breastfeeding DC3 (due in Jan) for all the reasons mentioned above.

Lots of the other (NCT) mums switched to the bottle quite early on for their own reasons, but one time that sticks in my mind massively was when I was out with the mums for a lunch with our babies, one mum's baby was screaming blue murder as she was hungry, so mum had to get the formula ready - wasn't hot so had to wait to get boiling water from the waitress to warm the feed, then she spilled her formula mix all over the table and had no spare, baby still screaming, nobody had any spare feed with them as they were all needed or used so she had to go home, screaming, hungry baby in tow. Not meaning to sound smug at all, but it certainly reassured me that I could provide for my DD without any of that hassle.

I hope for your sake you are able to feed your DC2 yourself, but don't beat yourself up if you can't.

I'm ebf at the moment (baby is nearly 6 wks). I use 1 expressed feed a day to buy me some "me" time to go to the gym or whatever but do the nightfeeds myself. I was the other way round to some people as found it a doddle to start with but now son has reflux so it's pretty stressful- however, that's not a breast v bottle point as reflux would likely be worse with formula.

Ad/Disad for me

Ad: pretty much as others have mentioned: convenience, bonding, no sterlising except for expressing stuff, weight loss and uterine contraction are quicker, protects against illnesses in the baby, less bad wind and reflux vs formula, less smelly poo!

Disadv: Night feeds depress the shit out of me if I'm honest, but that is mainly because the reflux is worse and it can take me ages to settle him, ridiculously large breasts, limited wardrobe- so basically all my reasons against are shallow and vain!

Oh yeah- one more thing. I know that they always say "dont think that using formula will make your baby sleep through/ sleep longer" BUT FF babies do seem to go longer between feeds. Pre 6 weeks, I dont know any ff babies who were/are a 2 hr cycle, and conversely no bf babies on a 4 hr cycle.

Anyway, not trying to put you off, as for me, the adv still outweight the disadv and doing one more night feed from bed (bf) might well suit better than doing fewer feeds but having to faff around heating up bottles.

I think breastfeeding for the first 6 to 8 weeks is very very difficult. It can be relentless and I found my DD was feeding every 1.5 to 2 hours for up to 1 hour at a time so a lot of the time she was going less than half and hour between feeds. There were times in the early days when its not an exageration to say that I spent whole days unable to move from the sofa. There were a lot of tears of frustration in this time. You need to be prepared for this but also to know that this stage doesn't last forever.

Once you get past the initial weeks breast feeding is much more convenient than bottle feeding and it allows much greater freedom because you don't need to plan your feeds in advance if you want to go out and about. It also means that you have a guaranteed means of comfort for your baby. There are times when only the boob can calm my DD if shes poorly or distressed.

Night feeds even in the early weeks are much easier than FF even if you are feeding from cartons IMO. This is especially true if you can learn to feed lying down. I've taken to popping DD in bed with me when she wakes up so she can feed while I doze.

Unlike some of the other posters my DD (15 weeks) is still feeding every 1.5-2 hours but she feeds for shorter amounts of time now. This may be because she is still very small (2nd centile) and hopefully the feeds will space as she gets bigger.

As a side point I have recently introduced a bottle of FF at night to see if DD slept better. She did for the first night but for the subsequent nights she has slept the same as she did on BF.

It's great when he's fretful or been upset by something I can just pop him on the boob for a couple of minutes and it settles him straight away. Not sure you could always have a bottle of formula on the go for that.
The first few weeks can be tough but I have definitely found it worth persevering.

No issues here either. Loved it, and stopped at just over a year - only because I need my periods to come back so we can try for another!

That's another thing - no periods!

Love feeding DS, 15 mths. Apart from being a very hungry boy for about 7 months, it's been a breeze. Have also only ever has positive experiences of feeding in public.
Second the advice about going to your support groups when pregnant, that way, if you do have any questions / issues you have some friendly faces to go to for support.

Good luck!

no issues here either :) I have found it lovely tbh. I think one thing I found really helpful was reading this board all the time when I was pregnant, so I knew what to expect, and could reassure myself that things were normal - so I didn't worry that him feeding all the time initially was becuase he wasn't getting enough, that it was just because he was a week old! I do know a fair few people irl who have stopped bfing pretty early on because they thought exactly that. Now at 7 weeks he is suddenly feeding much more efficiently so feeds aren't taking all day any more ;) Now we just need to work on them not taking all night either lol. But as others have said, the beauty is you don't have to get out of bed and you can just latch them on and doze off again!

Good luck with it :)

I had no problems either, and the benefits just in terms of convenience have been huge. Brilliant for things like going out for the day, going on holiday, spontaneously deciding to stay the night at my mum's - no bottles, sterilising, water temperature issues, worrying about bacteria etc. Night feeds have been relatively painless I think as I don't need to actually get out of bed!

I do use occasional bottles of formula - maybe once/twice a week so I can go out and leave him with his dad or a babysitter.

I did have problems with breastfeeding at first (quite significant ones for the first 6-10 weeks tbh) but I am now expecting No. 2 and fully intend to try to breastfeed again as, overall (I bf for 16 months), it was a wonderful experience and I also found it more convenient than I think I would have found preparing bottles etc (not to mention the health benefits to DS and to me) especially at night.

Do make sure you have/get good support though. In the early days DH was the only one that could get DS to latch on at all and seeing a bf counsellor helped me correct the latch and have the confidence to persevere at the point when I felt ready to give up. Great advice on MN too of course.

I expressed some feeds to enable me to go out from time to time (but DS did refuse a bottle after three months but it didn't really matter by then as he wasn't feeding so frequently by then anyway so I could go out for a meal with friends and be back in time for the 11 p.m. feed for example).

Wishing you all the best

I'm another that's never had any problems! It's gone so well that I'm still BF DD and she just turned 2. I've heard that it can be tough to start with, it is a skill that you and your DC will have to learn but once you pick it up then it's plain sailing (and I say that as possibly the world's laziest parent )

I second joining a BF support group, it's nice to chat to other mums and a BF counsellor. Some HCPs can give shocking advice about BF so talking to an expert can really help. LLL or NCT have groups in most areas and you can go along before DC2 arrives so you can get more advice on how to prepare for BF. Best of luck! :)

I know that some people have medical or psychological reasons for FFing and I respect that.

But I'll never understand how anyone can describe BFing as being more difficult or inconvenient than FFing in the absence of these kinds of problems.

I found it brilliant - an instant supply of sterile, nutritious milk at exactly the right temperature. BFing enables me to travel v. light (I prefer not to use prams or carry big bags) and be more flexible in taking DD out and about. No cleaning bottles or enduring hungry crying while you prepare feeds.

If you co-sleep as well, night-feeding can be extremely easy. Often neither me nor DD will even wake when she feeds in the night.

One more side benefit is the easy weight-loss. I'm pretty happy as I am but have had to eat like a horse just to avoid losing weight since DD was born. It would be a great way to lose pregnancy weight if that's something you're aiming to do.

I hear all the BF horror stories IRL too but can't relate to any of them. I also get sick of the "poor you" comments from some people when they learn that DD is still BFing at 20 months.

Yeah, right. DD is happy and healthy, we've had no sleep problems, I never had to lug round a great bag full of feeding paraphernalia or deal with the cleaning up afterwards. Poor me indeed...