I hope it is ok to post here - I need advice for hair

[CurlyBaby]

My dds hair lately has gone crispy. I’ve been using (what I thought) was a moisturising shampoo and conditioner (coconut one for dry hair). I don’t think it’s right though.
Im white and I have no idea. Her dad is a quarter jamaican and says he has no idea 🤷‍♀️

I have nobody in rl to ask and I’m totally confused by what I see online. I think her hair is 3b curls ??? But as I said it’s gone very crispy lately.

What can I use that will help. I looked at curly girl method but is this ok for her hair ? Sorry if this is not ok to ask here I can get this removed if its not ok

I'll think a moisturising shampoo and conditioner are good basics.
Youtube is a great source to find someone with her hair type and follow their regimen for a bit.

www.harpersbazaar.com/beauty/hair/g37210360/black-owned-hair-products/

Might be some ideas here. American but you can see whether Amazon have it.

For UK based, these guys are great 😃 afrocenchix.com/

I think I’ll do that thankyou.

i just don’t know what’s happened lately her hair just seems so crispy and I’m worried it’s damaged 🙁

Thankyou - just been having a look the moisturising spray looks really good I think that’s the sort of thing she needs as it’s like her hair just loses it’s moisture so quickly ? I’ll probably get one to try

Do you have Facebook? Search for Soaps For Little Suds Conditioner Group.

Their products have been a god send for my son's hair. I use their avocado conditioner bar. It's so nourishing.

I find anything with coconut is really drying on my son's hair.

I wash with Faith In Nature Blueberry conditioner, detangle with a Denman brush, rinse conditioner out, then apply the conditioner bar as a leave in.

Here's his curls slightly damp in one photo, and completely dry in the other.

I’ll have a look at Denman brushes , I’ve been using a tangle teezer in her hair when I’ve put conditioner on as I can’t actually brush it when it’s dry as it makes it more dry/crispy/tangled and unmanageable so I used the tangle teezer wet but not sure that’s correct.

The coconut shampoo and conditioner I have just don’t seem to actually be moisturising despite saying for dry hair the conditioner just seems to sit on the hair and didn’t absorb so isn’t actually doing any good.

Those curls are amazing his hair looks so hydrated and healthy, I definitely can see that a leave in product is probably the way to go for us I’ll look up that conditioner bar as well Thankyou

@CurlyBaby take a look at Instagram, YouTube etc. Avoid products like Mixed Chicks and Cantu, they are very drying. You could also try co-washing (washing with conditioner) for a few weeks as your shampoo may be too harsh.

Also avoid heavy butters with 3B hair. Also, your DD's hair may not like coconut.

www.instagram.com/beadsbraidsbeyond/

www.britishcurlies.co.uk/
www.naturallycurly.com/

The problem with coconut is that it mimics protein, and it's therefore a bit of a marmite ingredient in the curly world. Some curls love protein and get a great bounce from it, but others find it really drying, my son's included.

You're definitely doing the right thing by brushing when wet. Brushing when dry will cause some breakages in the hair which is what causes small bits to "frizz" (I hate that word, but I can't think of another way to describe it).

I find that not using shampoo helps my son's hair, too. I co-wash his hair, which is basically washing with conditioner. I use a scalp brush to really massage the conditioner into the scalp to get a deep clean. I then take the hair section by section and comb out with the Denman, then rinse.

From that page, I really love either the Avocado Bar, or the Jamaican Black Castor Oil liquid conditioner (some people don't like the idea of a bar), which both work great as a leave in.

The Mielle leave in conditioner is also beautifully nourishing too - https://www.amazon.co.uk/Mielle-Pomegranate-Honey-Leave-Conditioner/dp/B075PTHVKN/ref=mpssa111?crid=6PZ9LUDPDJKL&keywords=mielle+leave+in+conditioner&qid=1654554975&sprefix=mielle%2Caps%2C71&sr=8-1

Does it need cutting? Damaged ends can affect the look and feel of the entire length.

Are you overloading it with product and not washing it out properly?

perhaps you could post a picture of your child’s hair for reference.

I think you should try shea moisture. Currently it's great for dd's hair.

I find products with coconut scalp and hair drying.

OP, you can use leave in or moisturiser spray in the morning and on the days between washes to moisturise her hair further. My sister in law taught me to mix leave in conditioner with water in a spray bottle and then use that to moisturise the hair in the morning. Spray it in small sections so you really work the product into the hair thoroughly, then comb through. How old is your girl? Can she sleep with a bonnet? This helps with breakage too.

Your DSs curls are to die for 😍
I was going to ask how frequently you wash. My DS’s hair almost looks Caucasian but has got coarser as he has got older. It still only was once a week max.

@Turningawayfromthelight Thank you so much. I love his hair so much.

We wash once every 7-10 days. If he has swimming, then we wash weekly on swim day. Then I refresh every 2-3 days in between by spraying with warm water and adding some more leave in conditioner to keep it moisturised xx

@@TokenGinger Your son’s hair is beautiful. Does he sleep on a silk/satin pillow? His hair texture is like mine and I need some pointers! I’ve just bought the conditioning bar and conditioner you recommended so hoping for great things.

@Userengage Thank you so much. It's really important to me that as he grows, he's proud of his heritage and embraces everything that comes with that so I've spent a lot of time learning how best to care for his hair.

I really hope you love the bar and conditioner. Top tip for the bar, soak it in a jug of hot water whilst you're doing your wash routine as it softens it enough to apply. I take his hair section by section and run the bar from root to tip to make sure it's all covered. As he's getting a bit older and more restless with me doing his hair, I don't always manage to cover his whole hair with the bar so I will add in a small blob of the liquid and run that through with my fingers just to make sure it's covered, but 9/10, the bar alone is enough.

We had a transition period with his hair. We didn't get perfect results immediately, but that's because his hair was still recovering from the coconut products I'd been using. We started to see our best results after 2-3 weeks.

Once I've applied the bar, I use a diffuser on a low heat to help it soak in, as otherwise my son's hair just has it sit on top. It needs that heat to help penetrate.

There's a really helpful group that the owner set up where I go to for advice which you might find helpful. It's on Facebook and called Soaps For Little Suds Conditioner Group xx

Oops sorry, I missed the question about the pillowcase. Unfortunately he doesn't sleep on a satin case just yet, as he's a fidget and wriggles around the bed, but I do think we'd get longer lasting results if he did.

I find the key to managing his hair is moisture, so every 2-3 days, I spray with warm water and run some more of the liquid conditioner through his hair and it looks as good as when it's first washed again xx

@TokenGinger thanks for taking the time to write such a detailed reply. The bar has just arrived so I’ll be using it and the conditioner on my next wash day this week.

@Userengage You're very welcome. Good luck with it x

Just came to say how nice, supportive and informative this thread was. Lovely responses that were actually helpful 😊.

@TokenGinger @Soma thank you guys so much. The penny has finally dropped as to why two of my kids hair aren't great with coconut oil and only one is. The coconut oil is drying out their hair! Can anyone recommend good detangling brush for a 20 month old and combs? She has I'd say 4c hair, I've looked on suds insta page and sent a message as I'm not sure what products to get.
Apologies @CurlyBaby and thank you for this thread.

If you join this page, there's great advice on which products would be best. For 4C hair, I'd recommend the avocado range. The conditioner bar for wash days and the liquid version for refresh days.

Page: www.facebook.com/groups/328309048674284/?ref=share

Oh, also on the brush front, I love the Denman brushes for mine and my son's hair. We started off with this smaller one when he was younger and only recently moved to the larger version: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Denman-D3-Classic-Styling-Hairbrush/dp/B00197623M/ref=mpssa111sspa?crid=198GDHJFV6E7R&keywords=denman+hair+brush&qid=1675385677&sprefix=denm%2Caps%2C164&sr=8-1-spons&spp_csd=d2lkZ2V0TmFtZT1zcF9waG9uZV9zZWFyY2hfYXRm&psc=1

Oops sorry one last point - the lady who owns Soaps For Little Suds doesn't use Insta (somebody else set the page up for her) so she won't reply on there but she's very responsive on Facebook xx

@TokenGinger your son’s hair is utterly gorgeous.

@TokenGinger thank you so much. I will get the avocado range and the brushes. Will give her a call as I'm not on Facebook. I'm so excited I'm replying in the middle of the night 😂
I'm sure you're fed up of hearing this, your son's hair is fab.