Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Birth clubs

Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

June-ior middleweights - fighting on through the second trimester (Due June 2010)

1000 replies

CantSleepWontSleep · 21/01/2010 15:12

Here we go ladies - I'll C&P the stats in a tick. Don't forget to add the gender on if you find out at your scan

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
GibberingGinger · 09/02/2010 20:00

Gina, my thoughts are with you. Such a difficult and sad time . Like with Cadmum, I hope the future holds better things for you. It really puts things in perspective.

I'm currently hooked up to a ECG (heart) monitor, as I've been experiencing some heart palpations and my pulse is generally much faster than usual. Probably just due to the extra strain my body is under growing these two, but the consultant wanted a 24 hour trace. Means I have various electrodes stuck to my chest (one annoyingly sticking out above my Vnecked top - so people have been staring at it all day) and a personal stereo (for those who remember them) sized box clipped to my belt. However my maternity trousers are over the bump ones so the box is kind of wedged under my armpit

Anyone watching the channel 4 programme "one born every minute" tonight? Is about a labour ward/maternity unit. I probably shouldn't watch it cause they will show all the dramatic( traumatic) labours but it's too compelling, I'll get drawn in I'm sure.

gaelicsheep · 09/02/2010 20:25

Oh Gina I am so so sorry to hear your news. I have a friend who went through the same thing. You have both come to a very brave decision and I wish you all the very best for the future. xx

MonkeyMargot · 09/02/2010 20:38

Yikes *Gibbering". Sounds frightening. I hadn't given much thought to the fact that twins put so much strain on your body, until I started reading a book about multiple births last night which a friend bought for me. No wonder your poor heart is racing!! Have you got to sleep with the electrodes in you? You must feel like metal mickey...

LittleRobbo · 09/02/2010 20:49

gibberingginger i had a 24 hour ecg with DS2 because of racing heart/palpitations,its very common apparently. The tests came back totally fine,and the palps eased off when i reached 3rd trimester. Bloody uncomfortable to sleep in though!

CantSleepWontSleep · 09/02/2010 20:53

I've had those 24 hour things twice gibbering (unrelated to pregnancy). The worst thing for me was the not being able to shower whilst wearing them!

Hadn't heard of that programme, but have just set it to record now that you've mentioned it, so will pop it on once I've caught up with Eastenders. I always find Tuesdays a quiet TV night.

OP posts:
CantSleepWontSleep · 09/02/2010 20:56

Oh, I've been meaning to ask for ages as I know that someone mentioned something about it (maybe filly or gizmo?) a while back, but is anyone getting any help in after the baby is born, and if so, what sort, and do you mind sharing if you have some idea of how much it will cost? If dh is working abroad again then I'm tempted to get a maternity nurse/mothers help/whatever in, but I don't really know who does what, and how much it would cost, to be able to work out if it's realistic or not.

OP posts:
MonkeyMargot · 09/02/2010 21:08

CSWS I'd also be interested to understand the difference between mother's help/mat nurse/nanny etc. We will be looking for some help after I return to work, and not necessarily a nanny.

Hope everyone is having a good Tuesday. I must say I am starting to feel woefully tired when I come home from work at the moment. And the heartburn this time around is horrendous. I'd forgotten about heartburn. It really sucks.

I am going to have to go to bed now as I am sick of having to watch flaming football. Harumph...

LittleRobbo · 09/02/2010 21:17

Oh dear lord is anyone else watching One Born Every Minute? I would have stabbed the hubby with the blown up glove who thinks hes hilarious,not! Not sure if its a good idea watching this actually but i cant stop now i've started.....

MillyMollyMoo · 09/02/2010 21:23

I'm not watching they never show the straight forward births, I've no interest in frightening the life out of myself by watching things that'll never happen.

Can I tell you all about a great car seat I saw today, it's called the be safe izi sleep, it lies flat so can be used as a travel system with iCandy bugaboo stokke for 4 hours instead of two. There's an isofix option too.

CantSleepWontSleep · 09/02/2010 21:58

Is that the one that Which? ripped to pieces millymolly, or a diff one?

OP posts:
gaelicsheep · 09/02/2010 22:03

Ooh, that woman's delivery (the one with the twat husband) reminded me so much of how DS's birth ended up. Although I don't think she was pushing for 3.5 hours!

MillyMollyMoo · 09/02/2010 22:03

I haven't seen the which report, maybe it is but they ripped the jane matrix and mamas and papas navetta to shreds, maybe they just don't like lie flat car seats.

If anyone has the report I'd be grateful if they could post it.

GibberingGinger · 09/02/2010 22:07

I watched "one born every minute". That Steve bloke was a . I would have murdered him. Stroking her with a blown up glove whilst she pleaded to be left alone

I'm not too bothered/worried by the ECG monitor. Its the consultants idea more than mine. I'm just annoyed that I spend the whole summer running 3 times a week to try and get fitter/lower heart rate, and just 8 weeks after my last run my pulse is stupidly high. In fact I'm probably only aware of it cause I was obsessed with trying to lower it over the summer!

Still haven't made any purchases or thought too much about stuff. Have booked a weeks holiday in March though .

GibberingGinger · 09/02/2010 22:08

that was supposed to be tw**

CantSleepWontSleep · 09/02/2010 22:12

Ah no, those ones you mention are prob the ones that I'm thinking of milly - it was a while ago, when I was choosing one for dd (now 4) I think.

He was an utter knob wasn't he ginger.

I've booked a holiday too, for April. Only in UK, but it looks like a great place for kids - see here.

OP posts:
MillyMollyMoo · 09/02/2010 22:22

Have just signed up to which, phew it's a best buy with isofix and scored 68/ with the seat belt, so I'm happy with that I know we'll be out and about for more than 2 hours a day most days so that's a huge plus.

MillyMollyMoo · 09/02/2010 22:26

We had our holiday in eygpt in January to make sure I got my sunshine dose this year. Am considering a week I'm Cornwall over 250 miles for us with an 8 week old in August which may be slightly bonkers haven't decided yet.

fillybuster · 10/02/2010 10:06

Gina, only just saw your post I was so sorry to hear your news, and hope you are getting all the support and love you need in RL to help you through.

CSWS I'm going to keep my 4-day-a-week nanny (but get her to do 5 days) for the first 3 months or so, and hang the expense. Yes, it will wipe out most of my maternity pay, but it will preserve my sanity and ensure that DD and DS don't suddenly feel abandoned. Once we get past the first 10/12 weeks then I'll see if she will go down to reduced hours (last time she went down to 50% and just did nursery/school collection onwards and then went down again to 3 afternoons a week at around 6 months, which gave me some breathing space). Although dh thinks we should get an au pair for 6 months, to give us some help from the 6-12 month bit before I go back to work instead of paying nanny. Will have to see how it works out...I need to find a balance between cost and sanity!!

Still pondering the baby carrier options. Def don't want a sling, but a decent carrier would be a bonus. Only other thing I really need is a decent baby-chair for around the house. For some reason we only got a really crap cheap one for ds, never got around to getting a better one for dd, and I know how useful it is to have a chair the lo is happy in, esp when there are 2 other dcs to look after too! Recommendations welcome...it doesn't need to do too many clever things (def not play music!)

Milly - I may get shouted down for this but I think you can over-worry about the car seat thing (I know we did ) and the whole thing feels more like a marketing ploy playing on new parents' worry than anything 'real'. Truth is, that even the 'normal' car seats are fine for more than 2 hours, just not all the time, iyswim. So unless you're planning to spend huuuuuge amounts of time doing distance driving in your car, it may not be worth getting that worried about. Given the average length of most babies feed/sleep/nappy change cycles, you'll generally be lucky to get more than a 2 hour period where they're going to be sitting still without needing to get them out for something...

playftseforme · 10/02/2010 11:36

CSWS I've got an odd au-pair arrangement at the moment - she lives with a neighbour helping with a 14yo, and has time on her hands so has been helping me with drop offs and pick ups and the odd evening when I'm stuck at work. 14yo is off to boarding school at the end of April, and AP is going home for 2 weeks in May. So I'm going to see if she can do nearer to full time with us after that. She will only be around to Sept so after that I will play it by ear but maybe go for a more typical AP/AP+ arrangement. I'm going to keep dd at pre-school for 4/5 sessions as well and maybe at her CM for 1 day (instead of 2 currently) cos she loves her CM. Am going to attempt to have a 'conversation' with dd to see if I can work out whether she might like this or would feel pushed out - don't hold out much hope! Need to try though cos everyone needs 4 wks notice so I need to do some advance planning. When dh next graces us with his presence one of our combined tasks will be to come up with a basic job spec and budget.
There was a thread a little while ago where the consensus was that getting some help was a brilliant idea and not self-indulgent and I've taken that to heart

gizmo · 10/02/2010 12:58

Hello all. Mad few days at work so coming on here and reflecting about life after birth is really therapeutic.

Although it's obviously not working that well for Gibbering! When do you get rid of your wires, GG? Will you get some feedback quickly? I have occasional palpitations and racing heart and I imagine having a prolonged attack must be very unpleasant, particularly if nothing you do will slow it down.

For all those thinking about roping in extra pairs of hands I think PlayFTSE and Filly are definitely onto something. It may not kill you to have to go it alone, but it certainly puts a lot of extra strain on! Particularly if things don't go totally to plan - I learnt my lesson with DS1, when stress (he had to go back to NICU because we failed to establish feeding), isolation and exhaustion left me begging the health visitor to send me back to hospital. Luckily my family has enough resources to chip in and help me hire a mother's help for 3 months and it just gave me enough precious space to pull out of the PND.

To answer CSWS/MonkeyMargot's questions about different types of support available, my experience there is a degree of overlap. The principal difference is whether their focus is on mother or baby/other children: so for example a nanny will probably be most help with the older children - many will not be that experienced with tiny newborns, although it's always worth asking. A maternity nurse is specifically trained and experienced with newborns - a sort of highly targeted nanny, if you will. Useful for advice for new mums, giving you a break (even at night! Many maternity nurses stay over and help out on the night shift), perhaps helping you get baby in a routine if you're that way inclined.

Focussing more on you, a doula 'mothers the mother.' Making sure you don't have to worry about anything except the baby by doing housework, cooking, perhaps minding older children, general advice, breastfeeding support, bringing you tea and cake etc etc. A mother's help is similar, but perhaps tends to focus more on housework and childcare and less on advice and moral support.

On cost front I tend to think of a sliding scale which goes Maternity Nurse-Nanny-Doula- Mother's help but obviously there's a lot of overlap depending on competence and experience.

This time around I've saved some money specifically to have the luxury of keeping my nanny on for two days a week and I might see if I can persuade DH to take a regular day off each week for the first 6 weeks . I'll try the 'lots of long weekends' argument - it can't fail .

meggymegmegs · 10/02/2010 13:03

I saw the One Born Every minute programme too, I was screaming at that idiot Steve, what a selfish prick. Dh was watching it too and made me laugh by being completely at the squelching noise when one of the babies was born in the clip at the end. Thinking he'll be at real-life labour - I think we need some antenatal classes fast .

On that note, can anyone give me advice on antenatal classes? I've been trying to sort out NCT classes but unfortunately they're struggling to get a teacher in our area so that's a no go. What did you all do when you were pg with your first?

goodname · 10/02/2010 13:15

Man, still not managing to keep up with this thread. Just had my 24 week check up and it was very quick, all is well and apparently I have a stocky little baby in there which sounds a little worrying actually . He is certainly good at kicking, have felt him since about 16 weeks and now its very strong. Had a good swim afterwards, am swimming at least twice a week now and it really makes me feel much better (would go every day if I had the time).

Sorry to hear your news Gina. Nice to see you on again Cadmum, how are you doing?

With regards to getting help, I am in a very luckuy position of having a massive family around to help out (I have 4 sisters). My mum lives a 2 minute walk away and my sister works as a nanny just around the corner from me. I think I would find the thought of having kids much harder without so much family nearby.

Ginger, hope you have got on okay with your heart monitor?

Still buying loads of things, bought a close carrier sling from here yesterday and my real nappies arrived today (pop in dream dri). They look pretty good, anyone else using / used these or have other reccomendations (only bought a half sized pack of 10 so I could try others as well.)
Sadly my washing machine died yesterday so will have to get a new one asap. Seems like so much stuff to buy just now.

We are hoping to get away for a weekend (prob to Lake district in March sometime. Might as well make the most of our freedom just now I guess. That place in Cornwall looks really good CSWS. I love Cornwall but it is a 10 hour drive for us so may avoid that for the near future!

Sorry for the very long post

dinosaurinmybelly · 10/02/2010 13:24

Hello meggymegmegs I too missed out on the NCT classes because they were oversubscribed in all my surrounding areas when I got in touch at 12 weeks! I went to the classes at my hospital and they were very good, but they were scheduled during the day, and my midwife didn't get me registered until just before the birth, so I spent 3 days at the hospital at various classes during my one week of maternity leave which wasn't ideal. The classes were very good and of course it is always a good idea to get a feel for the hospital you are going to have your baby in anyway.

For me, I have to say that the Marie Mongan book gave me an insight into the softening of the pelvis and opening of the cervix bit which was all new to me - so the hospital just added the bits about what to do if your waters break but no contractions etc. I remember reading a great Miriam Stoppard book too which was a great preparation looking back - it even had a page on what to do if you don't make it to the hospital (which many of the books don't!)

I think if your hospital doesn't offer a course, there may be private options available. Certainly in London I know that couples can go off for a weekend of birth preparation classes - but I think they cost around 250 quid.

LaTrucha · 10/02/2010 13:38

Just a quick one on reusable nappies. I've tried quite a few and I'm very happy using mainly Motherease birth to potty nappies. They wouldn't do for a newborn though, unless it's huge, so I've bought some Motherease Sandys off here too. I use Motherease airflow wraps because I don't like applix / velcro but I think the velcro ones are probably the way to go with a newborn. Prefolds or a muslin in a wrap work well with a newborn too.

I'm not much good at pocket nappies because DD is very slim and for a toddler you need to be able to bulk them out with lots of stuffing and she walks like John Wayne with them on.

I also like popolini but I'm the only one I know who does. In fact, I've inherited lots that other mums couldn't use. It's because DD is very slim. I'd like some big size ones too but I'm always reluctant to spend money so am waiting for second hands to come up on here.

I also tried Totsbots, which are fine but I prefer poppers to the nappy nipper so they're all a draw at the moment.

If some motherease come up on here, why don't you give them a whirl. They're a good staple.

On that front, I don't think we'll be able to afford any help, though I may stretch to a couple of hours of a cleaner's time. It will mean cut backs in other areas though. Being a SAHM is wonderful, but the finances have to learn to stretch!

CantSleepWontSleep · 10/02/2010 13:49

meggymegs - is there another nct area nearby that you could go to? I didn't go to my 'nearest' group, but to another one that ran on better days for me (dh was abroad mon-thurs every week, so found some on a thurs night rather than the mon night that was offered initially). I also did the NHS ones that were offered, where it was good to meet new people some of whom were also on my later post natal course.

Lucky you having all that helpful family around goodname. Unfortunately we don't really have any family support (in-laws 40 mins away, but they won't change nappies, fuss a lot, like to give the baby back when it cries, don't have the energy to play with the older dc for long (they are mid 70's) don't seem to approve of our parenting style much, and don't really offer to help with housework or anything whilst they are here, so not a lot of use really!).

A mothers help sounds like it would be enough for me tbh, as long as the older dc like her and she will do some cooking/stuff round the house - I don't need the advice part and will want the baby in with me at night anyway, so I suppose in some ways it would be silly to pay more for a maternity nurse. But I do know of a very good one who could be available for 3 weeks for me. I am actually quite tempted to speak to dd's fave teacher from nursery school and see if she wants/is allowed to work during the school holiday, and would come during the day during August. Otherwise, how does one go about finding a really good mothers help?

OP posts:
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread