It's amazing how quickly we go from trying to convince ourselves it's real and that we are really pregnant to planning the birth! Brilliant.
I am definitely having a hospital birth this time as I had to have a c-section last time due to failure to progress and fetal distress. I was in labour under the care of the natural birth unit attached to my local hospital for 29 hours before they moved me next door, I went from no painkillers whatsoever to an epidural!
I have to say the birthing pool was a disappointment for me. It certainly eased the contraction pains, especially in my back, and helped me go into a very pleasant out-of-it stupor/daze/trance, but when I look at my notes it is really clear that my contractions slowed, spaced out and dilation halted from the minute I got in the pool (12 hours after contractions began and 20 hours before my baby was eventually deivered).
I read a really interesting book by a French surgeon, a caesarean specialist, in the months after the birth and he claims that in almost 100% of cases where a labouring woman experiences that labour slows up when she goes into the pool, she will end up having a c-section delivery and usually a long time later. He advocated using the pool as a test and argued he was so convinced on this that he wanted women to be sent for a section immediately if that happened. It would have saved me a lot of hours of discomfort anyway!
So watch out for that one all you water birth ladies. Don't panic or be put off though as I think most women do find it both soothes and speeds along the labour. The mother of my goddaughter had both her children in a birthing pool with no other pain relief and she is normally a total wimp and extremely squeamish. She raved about using the pool. But if you get in the pool and everything slows down, flag it up with the midwife and ask if you can try alternatives instead.
I live in Scandinavia and the c-section rate is 10% here so they are really reluctant to grant them and they want me to try for a vaginal birth this time. I'm quite anxious about it but will give it a go. I have been watching videos of normal deliveries on YouTube and then compared it to a video (could only watch one) of a caesarean. Oh my god I had never imagined how gory the surgery was, I was hiding behind my hands peeping through my fingers for most of it. So glad I didn't have to see any of that when they did mine!
I was in hospital for five days last time and DH was with me for the last two nights in a family room in the "patient hotel" (!) they kept telling me I could stay as long as I liked and didn't have to go home until I was ready and confident with breastfeeding. They didn't know what they were saying, I think I could quite happily have moved in for good, I was scared to come home!
This time I am going with an open mind and I have no preconceptions about how the birth will be. I've got over it now but at the time I was so disappointed the way my planned natural birth happened in the end. I don't care how the baby comes out this time, just want it to come out safe and well. I also am much more pro painkillers than I was with my first pregnancy. Every woman experiences labour differently and each labour can be different for the same woman. With no concept of the sensations of labour it's very tricky to make any plans or decisions, I think women are unreasonably expected to make choices in advance when they can't really know how it's going to affect them.
Sorry that ended up being a bit of a ramble. I clearly have lots of thoughts about that still locked up in my head, I thought it was all ironed out and behind me...!