Due Dec 08 -- Getting Ready for final push (in every sense!)

[Beans33]

Here's a new thread for us all lovely Dec Mums!

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

Hi CatDean, I think a couple of people have read it, and I think someone's even been to a talk of hers. Apart from hearing about her calling fannies 'gates of life' or somesuch I don't know anything about her. Where are you having your baby?

LT - I had a section last time so have some experience which may or may not help...although it was done as an emergency at 30 weeks so I guess it's not the usual experience!
I don't remember the spinal being particularly painful - I had to sit on the trolley, bent over, while they did it, and then they tested with an ice cube to see how much of me was numb!
The op itself was done behind a screen and DH stayed my side with me and the anaesthetist, but he was invited to go round and watch and even cut the cord.
I assume the catheter went in under anaesthetic because I have no recollection of it going in! I also discovered that I'd been given PR pain relief (up the bum!) without knowing it too!
All stitching etc is done in theatre before you go to recovery...then after that I imagine my experience is far from typical so I don't know what happens next - for me it was a trip to ICU and a blur...!
Things that I wasn't expecting (but if I'd had half a brain could have guessed!) were:
*you have to take your knickers off!
*a midwife comes a shaves your bits!
*After the op there's loads of bleeding - I thought that only happened if the baby came out via the usual route but that's not the case!!! Very much blood - midwives cleaning you up and changing big surf board style pads!
*You can't move your own legs for ages and that's weird

• I puked post-op but I think people respond differently to meds etc so that might not be your experience
• Pain didn't really seem to be an issue - either what they gave me was very effective, or I was so out of it that I didn't care/ blocked it out...no idea...I just don't remember being in much pain.
• my first shower was sitting down on a chair in the shower with a MW offering to help me... Hope that hasn't put you off...I'm fretting the other way now because I've opted for a vaginal birth and know NOTHING about it, so in a way would be happier with a section, but I want to at least try. Although the docs won't let me labour for long, won't induce me, won't let me go over and are likey to do an early section anyway so it might be beyond my control. Sorry if that was TMI. Hope some of it was useful!

Good morning Ladies!

Welcome cat!! I haven't read the Ina May book, however I would like to. My MW suggested that I read it... just haven't gotten around to it yet. Guess I'd better hurry up!!

pix Sorry to hear that the moving isn't going as smoothly as you'd hoped. Also sorry to hear about your belongings. Did they get stolen or ruined in storage??

So sorry to hear about all you ladies not getting any sleep. I guess we are being prepared for what is to come.

LadyT I had to stop reading all childbirth related books before bed. I kept having nightmares about poo covered babies and other such silly things.
As for your DH... hopefully it won't be so bad for him. I think they normally put a big sheet up in front of you so you can't really see what is going on until they deliver the baby... or at least that's how they do it in the States. So he shouldn't have to see any of that stuff. Maybe that will help to keep him calm.

I'm thinking of going ahead and getting some formula incase I can't BF... just as a back-up. What do you guys recommend for formula?

goodmorning all, sorry some are feeling a little icky and tres sleepy, woke up feeling mildly refreshed this morning despite the usually night wakings for loo trips and heartburn. but of course a little time on my feet sorting the house out has made me a little tired so am having a sit down now thinking of having a cuppa.

LT- sorry can't help much with the c-section stuff, i have looked after a few women who have had c-sections when i was in my 1st year out of uni and well all i can say is as much as you may want to swear and curse at the physio do what they say as it def helps later with reduced pain and early recovery.

Hi cat welcome, your due on my little sisters birthday. I have read the Ina May Gaskin book my MW lent it to me, i loved it really helped put me in a positive frame of mind for the birth. This will be my 2nd so a bit easier to be less apprehensive, but i thought the birth stories part at the start was quite good. Where do you live Cat? there is a list somewhere a few pages back with all our names etc and someone is doing an email list for birth announcements.

I am also very sad about the little babys death, esp when the health system has really robust measures in place to help these poor little things. The fact that it happened in Harringay again is esp sad. Also a 15 year old boy was shot here in Derby last night not something we are used to here (i wouldn't have been that surprised when i lived in Tower Hamlets) so very sad for that family.

Message withdrawn

I'm having a homebirth too Cat but with an independant midwife. I think as long as they can access you in an emergency and can get you out easy enough (a lift should be fine). If they say no and really want to push the issue, check the homebirth website i think it is connected to the independent midwives website. But really they will do all they can to get you your homebirth. If not though i've had a couple of friends have babies at the homerton and it was fine. There are a few girls on here from Stokey.

Hey if you want to live somewhere with it's own entrance we are renting out our place in London it is over near Canary Wharf and has three bedrooms and a back garden. sorry a bit cheeky i'm just getting a bit nervous about getting it rented out.

Morning everyone and welcome to cat pixsix sorry to hear your move isn't going to plan, I hope the storage people get their act together and quickly.

Today a lot of us seem to be in better moods, long may that last!

ladyt a friend of mine has had 2 c-sections, one emergency and one planned. Both were behind a screen, but for one she had to ask the drs to re-angle the big light overhead as she could see what they were doing reflected in it! Watch out for that if you're squeamish. Her DH fainted, but because of the heat in surgery, not because of the procedure, he said that was surprisingly easy to handle - so hopefully your DP will find the same.

Time for a bit more self indulgent moaning now, I think my cold has turned into an ear infection as I can hardly hear anything today. On a positive note, I slept better last night, but I can't get an appt with the Doc until tomorrow and I want some anti-biotics to clear it fast. And I just realised that this will be my last chance for selfish sleeping and moaning and when DC arrives I'll still have to put their needs first, when all I want to do today is lie in bed with a book. How do you cope with a child when you're ill? Not looking forward to that. However, lets be positive, it's a gorgeous autumn day here, so if I can motivate myself to get outside and enjoy it I might perk up a bit.

Have a good day all xx

zj Do you have a walk-in clinic nearby?? I wonder if you couldn't get seen faster by going to one of those rather than waiting until tomorrow.

Cat, a couple of people here are at the Homerton, I'm sure they'll be on later. But if you want a homebirth, stick to your guns, lady.

Trace, that was actually REALLY useful. Not bothered about shaving as I have a Hollywood (bet your lives have really been enhanced for knowing that - sorry!) though it's not very good at the moment as I have been doing it myself recently. But a midwife cleans you up and changes your pads??? Oh God, I won't like that! [dismayed emoticon] I'd rather DP did it (though I am sure he will have other ideas ). The whole idea of being washed and showered by nurses doesn't sit all that well with me. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination but I just don't fancy it, same as I wouldn't like to be fed by someone else either! I suppose they peer up your fanny and do internals just as they would if you have a vaginal birth. Great. The things we have to put up with!

Veggie, I am sure you are dead right about the physio and I will try to be a good girl. It has been drummed into me that women who get up on their feet and try to walk asap do better than those who don't.

Hi all, welcome Cat I've read Ina May as we're planning a home birth and I'm trying to surround myself with as many positive birth stories as possible. In terms of hormones that make labour successful, it all seems to make sense and her low-intervention approach seems to work. We'll just have to see!

pix really sorry to hear about your stressful move, hope the stuff turns up. How can they lose a sofa?!

LadyT - can't help at all on the CS front, I've been rather trying to ignore the possibility which is daft as the rate at my local hospital (if we end up there) is about 35%. It's a tertiary specialist hospital which takes all the mums from the region with any difficulties which obviously raises the figures, but they do have quite an interventionist attitude.

SL fire excitement! What warehouse was it?

verso I like your fish and chips plan, stroke of genius!

(rant warning) Our windows epic carries on, the initial work was done on the two bedroom window frames that were leaking cold air and rotten. Chap said "Oooh these bricks are a bit wobbly, might need repointing". Phone builders, girl on the phone says "sounds like about 2-3 hours work, should be about £100-150 all in". OK, not ideal but needs doing so the house doesn't fall in round our ears. We get a guy round to repoint, take out the dodgy plaster on the inside and replaster the walls round the window frame - quoted still at 3 hours max. He puts in an invoice for 10 hours work which strikes me as really quite excessive (first day, he claimed 3.5 hours to clear away the crumbly plaster on the inside? I could have done that if I'd know that's all he was going to do...) and says "I can't do those exterior bricks after all, you'll need to get a quote from the buildings dept to take a look". Next bloke came round yesterday, ummed and ahhed about the 10 hours to do total of 1 square metre of plastering and cut that down to 8 hours which is a start. Looked at the window that needs repointing, said they'll need to put up scaffolding (it's above a sloped roof so slightly hard to get to). Calls back later in the day with a quote to get scaffolding, take out dodgy bricks, make a new template, repoint, and probably redo the plaster on the inside that's likely to get damaged "cos you've got a 9 inch wall luv" - so not sure why first bloke bothered charging us for it if he knew it was likely to get damaged anyway .

Anyone care to hazard a guess...?

£1600 Of which £500 is for the scaffolding, which will be needed for a grand total of 2 days. It's that expensive "because it's quite hard to get the the back of your house". We live in a terrace, it's 10m down the side alley, 10m along the back alley and then you're in our garden. I offered to carry the poles myself if it would cut the cost, the poor little darlings having to go all that distance... And they can't do it before the end of next week/week after at the earliest - which is week 38 so the nipper could be with us while they tear the back of the house apart and we can't put curtains up because the poles will need to come down when they replaster.

We've decided to put it off til the spring when baby's safely arrived and get some other quotes which aren't SO BLOODY RIDICULOUS. Meanwhile, back window bricks are held up with a wooden prop and we're searching under the sofa for spare pennies. £1600 flipping quid for a job they estimated at £150. this house is a money pit, I tell you.

LadyT I did exactly the same last night and am now questioning my opted C-section. However, from my last experience (VB with epidural) I can tell you that you can hardly feel a thing when they do spinal epidural and cathetar goes in after you are numb. As for the rest of it, you know as much as I do.
My DH is also expressing concerns, although he was very impressive when DS was born, he faints at the sight of me injecting myself with insulin, so think I will be asking for a screen and banning him from looking south. I asked him last night if he wanted to cut the umbilical cord and he went green and asked to be allowed to think about it .
Trace, the nurse shaves you??? Oh well, suppose it gets DH off the hook as there is no way that I can see down there anymore and would be a little dangerous to attempt any delapidation (sp?) without full sight.
Welcome Cat.

Message withdrawn

Zoe You distract your children with cbeebies toys, games and crafty stuff.

Welcome Cat Hope you get your homebirth.

Pix Sorry about your move not going well. I've moved twice whil being 8 months pg and its not nice at all.

LadyT My DH was looking over my shoulder at this the other day and he thinks that LadyT would be a great name for a Bond girl.

Oh, and Kimberley, I have bought Aptamil because it called itself Breastmilk substitute and it has something called Immunofortis in. But that may all be rubbish. I reckon they are much of a muchness.

ZJ, your poor ears!

Quick question for the Stoke Newington girls - is there still a bar there called Blush? I think it's on Church street or something like that. It was (maybe still is!) run by the elder sister of an ex of mine and her girlfriend, I only went once but they did excellent cocktails!

LT waters are burst as part of the op and suctioned out. I had the spinal put in during labour last time so can't guess the pain this time - but, as I'm nervous too, I started a thread in pregnancy called elective c-section stories. There are some lovely ones amongst that lot. And the catheter should go in after the spinal - I'm going to be insisting on it! I'm also going to shave myself beforehand (still hate memory of the MW hovering with a bic razor from last time) this should, given sheer size, provide me with hours of fun. Failing that DH is being drafted in to sort it out . I don't remember any pain during or aterwards and I healed very quickly. I was in recovery for about an hour after the op whilst they monitored BP. I'm going to have skin to skin this time whilst in recovery, as last time DD stayed in her cot the entire time and it was a couple of hours before I held her.
I don't think anyone's DP looks forward to witnessing a section; but if he keeps his head low next to yours and stays behind the screen, he'll be fine. It's also really quick for the delivery - the stitching afterwards takes up the time. When DD was born, her dad spent my op carrying her around, completely in love, and helping the MWs to clean her and dress her. (He's scared of blood and his mum kept telling me how lucky I was that he agreed to go in with me .) I've read so many positive setion stories now that I'm actually feeling a lot happier, though I know I'll be nervous on the day. But, I keep telling myself an hour or so of the op for a lifetime of my little boy. I cannot wait!

I hope this helps . Good luck with it.

Kimberly, Iused Aptimil for DS as it is supposed to be the closest thing to breast milk. That may be bollocks, but he is now a strapping 3.5 year old so obviously didn't do him any harm!

Well then your DH is a poppet, Kayz. And I'd better change my MN name before I get done under the Trade Description ACt!

Oh, JJ...that is such a pig! Absolutely shocking! If you CAN put it off until Spring, that sounds v much the best.

Speaking of house trouble, what a bad time Twiga has had. I'm going to pop to her thread in the hope that there's been some positive progress for her. Then a shower and off back to London for me, I need to pop into the office...

Morning all,

I'm not sleeping well but certainly not suffering as much as some of you others. I feel for you all.

I am waking up every morning with a sore tummy though, is anyone else suffering? I think it might be trapped wind or something.

ladyT I have had a catheter put in for an op when I was awake and honestly didn't feel a thing. I expected it to be painful and was really tense but it was fine.

pixsix Sorry to hear about your stuff going missing. You must be so exhausted moving at this stage.

My neighbour is blasting an album of love songs through the wall, we've had Wet Wet Wet and now it's Brian Adams. Sometimes working from home has its downnsides.

Message withdrawn

Thanks Abbymeg. I'll have a read of your thread. Obviously a section is a small sacrifice for a beautiful babe, you are quite right, and I don't want to make a fuss really; I am just getting a bit

oh JJ thats all so annoying you poor thing, can't you crash something into it and claim it on insurance, in fact does your building insurance cover it? Still so for you that this was not picked up at the survey. Good idea to wait until spring though one for savings and 2 because if this goes on any longer would not be good for homebirth or just stress levels in general. Also is it worth getting some other quotes?

As far as the hormones (we did them in active birth class before yoga yesterday) i def think my anxiety levels slowed things down a bit as i think i released some adrenalin due to it. Sounds like a good idea to do the most you can to keep calm and not inhibit all those lovely endorphins. I think this time will be better as not so anxious and know what i'm doing this time. Oh and MW says she will bring 4 bottles of gas & air, i love gas & air.

Hello girls. Just checking in. So much to reply to

Pixsix - I am sorry that the move was such a pain. What stuff have you lost? Is there anything I can lend / donate to you? I seem to recall that you were coming over my way (SE london - I am in Dulwich) so if there is anything I can help with, please let me know. I am awash with all things baby (both boy and girl flavoured) so if there is anything at all I can help with, just let me know. I can even drive it over, as my lovely motor passed its MOT yesterday without needing anything done at all ! Hurray!

Talking of things, LadyT, if you don't make it to the meet up, do you want me to post the steriliser to you? If so, can you email me your address and I'll pop it it? You have my email address from the wonderful chart that Effie has worked so hard on.

Welcome Cat, good to have you on board. Whereabouts in the country are you?

Gay men - I must confess to fancying rather a lot of them myself. I had a HUGE crush on my BF at university. Even though he never had a girlfriend and we never did more than drunken snogging, I didn't want to let myself believe that we wouldn't end up together so I closed my mind to the possibility he was gay. Then he came out and I was a bit gutted but it's fabulous to have him as my Graham Norton equivalent. Camp as a row of camp tents in gold stilettos of course, but great fun. I also have a huge thing for Matthew Cutler from Strictly, even though he is clearly a friend of Dorothy's. And I wouldn't kick old John Barrowman out, though I might have to gag him as he is rather full of himself.

Sorry you are knackered Kayz. You have finished work now, haven't you? Can you get some rest in today?

Verso, good luck for the dentist and the MIL. I am not sure which is more painful. In response to somethign earlier on, my gums are awful and bleed a lot, but it's just increased blood supply and hormones acc the dentist.

Veggie, I agree that you should read up about BF if you want to try it, and not get put off. It can be really hard at first, but there is lots of good advice around (and much of it not from MWs/ HVs sadly). Second the recommendation for bestfeeding - it's a great book, but a bit wholemeal (lots of the people in it are a bit like the joy of sex people from the 70s. Except in photographs rather than drawings). I am quite wholemeal myself, but they make me look very contemporary . Your DS sounds lovely, by the way.

Sections - what Trace says is basically the same for a planned section (or even an emergency one at term). If it's planned, you might like to ask the MW looking after you to ensure that the tray of instruments if out of sight when you walk in as that is a little offputting. Some places let your DH come in for the spinal, many don't. It doesn't hurt, just feels a bit odd. You get the sharp scratch of the local, then a feeling of pressure as the other drug goes into the epidural space. Then your legs go warm and you discover you can't lift them. All the time though, you have at least one anaesthetist chatting to you, assuring you everything is OK etc. It is more unusual than painful, honestly.

He can watch the actual op or not, and if he sits behind the screen he will just be chatting to you and the anaesthetist about rubbish. It's like being at the hairdressers - "been on your holidays yet?" "What are your plans for christmas?" If you have any pain or whatever, it gets sorted immediately. The catheter goes in after the block starts to work. For your fluid, they get a sort of dyson out and suck it away - no hooks needed.

After the op (as you are being stitched up), it is usual to get the shakes and / or feel very itchy(reaction to the spinal). You will have a drip in your hand, so some lovely anti histamine will go in if you are itching. The shakes don't last long.

Back in recovery, they take your BP every 15 minutes and monitor your bleeding. You start to get your legs back after a couple of hours, from the toes first oddly. The wound is sore, but not agony. With DD1 I got out of bed in the evening (to see what was in my bounty bag - don't bother) and could walk well but tenderly after 24 hours. With DD2 I was up walking in 12 hours. You won't come apart. Afterpains with my first were barely noticeable. Morphine for post op pain great. Wind awful, but drink peppermint tea and thank the lord for a private room so you can make free . There's only one way for it to come out.

Hope that helps. If you want to have a chat about it, email me and we can talk over the phone. But DON'T WORRY. It really is going to be OK.

Love to everyone. Off to do some work now.