Due in June thread 6

[charleypops]

All I can say right now is AAAARRRGGGHHHH!!!!!

Lua - Gina Ford does a 'contented baby to contented todler' book too...never read it myself but that may have some pearls of wisdom re getting your dd to sleep through again??

Happy Birthday Lippy! x (and Trib?s step-father)

Uwila ? I think this will have to be an official competition. Whoever posts the most first time in the morning? OMG, I?ve just read that you get up at 5.30AM!!! That?s plain crazy. I get up at 6am, but I only have a house rabbit to wake and feed! And a 40 hour week ? these guys you work for are M-O-N-S-T-E-R-S!

Uki ? Where do you live in Oz then? Must be odd having us lot saying good morning when you?re off to bed!

Welsmum- Those slippers sound like an absolute dream!! Where did he get them from?

MrsW ? Glad your scan went well. x

Charley ? Think we?re doing a mini-trip round to Bombay and along the coast, can?t remember the name of the place, but will let you know. I have a theory on keeping busy too. I am hoping that it will fully prepare me for the shock to come in June (along with DP?s snoring, which is preparing me to be woken several times a night and cope with being grouchy in the morning? grrrrr).

Lippy ? Elizabeth Arden do a fab night cream. Good Night?s Sleep I think it?s called. It?s a bit pricey, but smells lovely, helps you drift off and really does get rid of ANY kind of line!

Cornflake ? well, that?s nice. My DP calls me Pookie after Garfield?s teddy bear, which I find a bit odd. Even odder is that there was a bear called Nookie in the 70s and my mum has a mug of mine from when I was little saying I [heart] Nookie and a grinning teddy bear ? oh how it makes me laugh!!

Mirage ? Yippee!! Another home birther!

Tessie ? That sounds sooooo painful! I can just about have my bikini-line done without screaming the place down. If they tried to remove anything more ?intimate? I think I?d pass out!

JonahB ? Hope today?s a better day for you. No chocolate in the house? my good God, that is a true sin!

I?m going to use disposables from birth, as I?ve seen my friend?s child who I struggling to move about with this huge padded weight round her bum. Honestly, I felt so sorry for her, she obviously wanted to try to crawl but gets her leg stuck underneath her, so only manages a bum-shuffle. I think it?s just plain cruel, although I will admit that there?s some pretty funky ones in Boots that look as though they could be suitable substitutes?

With regards schooling, I think it entirely depends on the school, not on whether it is private or state. In Salisbury, where I am from, it is majority private education, and really hard to find a state school, but I wouldn?t say that was the BEST option. I ended up going to one of the grammar schools and totally loved it. My brother did go to one of the state schools and also totally loved it. The state school he went to was a specialist in technology and practical skills (like it was affiliated with the catering college, which my brother eventually went to, as he is now a chef). The one thing that both schools had in common, which I personally think is the key to educational success is that they were single sex classes. My brother?s school shared grounds with a girl?s school so they could mix out of lesson time and mine was pure single sex. Having been to a co-ed school, my preferences lie with single sex education.

I bought the GF contented baby and the contented baby to confident child book. There is a chapter in sleep, but it applies more to the less than one year old. From what I've heard from parents of truly horrid sleepers, the true sleep God is Richard Ferber. I think his philosophy is much like GF in that you have to go through a period of being pretty strict, and then you will have happy child sleeping peacefully on your schedule (i.e. during the night). But, I have heard stories of a week or two of pure Hell. So, you have to be prepared to endure that first. Good luck!

re the travel cot, I think it is advised that they are not intended for long term use. Perhaps not great for baby's back? We bought one to use as a playpen when DD learned to crawl. DH would work away during the week, and I would have no way of confining her to a safe space when I needed to get in the shower. We started using it as a playpen before she could crawl so that she could get used to the space and be happy in it before it was used as a prison. The only other alternative would have been to put her in her cot, but I am firm believer that cots are for sleeping, and sleeping alone. If you put a baby into the cot sometimes for sleep, and sometimes for play, baby will not know when he/she goes in there if he/she is supposed to sleep or play. And I want my children always to be clear that the cot is for sleeping and there are no other options on offer. I'm a mean strict mummy I am.

Oh Scraggy, for the most part I like you. But it's over for you now. You challenged me to a competition and I have a wee little competitive streak in me. So, how early are you willing to get up to beat me to the post? Note that I don't usually post until I've been up for hours. So, if I change that routine a tad, I've got you beat every time. And, I could always start getting up at 5 (although DH might come and hunt you down if I have to do that). This could even get to the point where we will have to start defining where night ends and morning begins.

I'm sure you all think I am a raging lunatic now. Really, I'm not. Well, maybe a little...

OMG Jonah, I was just reading back over the recent maternity leave benefit conversation (on the last thread), and read your bit about full pay for 26 weeks.

By the way, I actually work for and E&C contractor, not an oil company. So that may be part of the explanation, as we have much lower budgets for overheads. But I'm still insanely jealous. I'd just like 12 weeks... and youget bloody 26. Alright, fess up, who do you work for?

Morning Lippy HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Ooh, does your dp make cake? Mmm - not sure if that 's a good thing actually...[girn]

Tea NOOO Did you?? I did that once with a length of toilet paper on a first date

Hmm - travel cots - I wondered the other day while looking at them if they could be used as a permanent cot (as I didn't see any wooden ones I liked). I llike your idea of a cot being just somewhere to sleep though Uwila

Scraggy my doggie wakes me up at least a couple of times during the night flapping his ears or dreaming so hopefully that will have prepared me a little bit for baby. I might have to check out that EA night cream too!

Happy birthday Lippy!!! Sounds like you've got a lovely day planned. Lots of food too - good to see .

Pink - the travel cot I've got isn't particularly comfortable and DS doesn't sleep well in it, so I'd definitely try and find one with a decent mattress in it (mine hasn't). The one you mentioned sounds great Katzguk.

Teabelly - oh how awful! I'm blushing for you. Although I've just been walking around the office with the top bottom of my trousers undone and didn't realise.

Charleypops - I found that getting up in the night all the time to go for a wee during pregnancy did get me used to broken sleep when DS was born. DH didn't have any preparation for it and didn't cope too well (and he wasn't actually doing any feeding or anything). However, my DS liked to wake up in the night then refuse to go back to sleep after he'd been fed, changed etc, and NOTHING prepared me for that!

Mirage - forgot to say yesterday, that's great news about your homebirth.

Hi All,

Quick catch up before I have to go back to work.

Katz - good for you on mat leave!!!

Lipstick - your DP makes cakes for you!!!! Wow!!!! That is impressive.

Uwila, if you're a contractor, that will explain why you get such measly mat terms. How it works with our company is that the 2nd 3 months wages are regarded as a loan. They "loan" me money for 3 months, on the proviso that I come back to work for 9 months. Its a way to stop their top workers (heh heh) leaving them. So, if I return to work for 3 months after mat leave, I will work off 1 month's "loan". I have to go back for 9 months to work off the 3 month loan. If I decided to go on mat leave fully paid, and didnt go back, I would owe them the money. Its a good system as I have every intention of going back and it means I wont be panicking about money.

However, a 40 hour week sounds good to me. I end up working much longer hours than that . I probably do on avarage 11 hour days. I was e-mailing my boss at 9pm last night. Swings and roundabouts. That's what happens when you care too much about your job. My own fault really. However, cos I work at home, if I want to pop to the shops, or live in my trackie bottoms, I can, which I think is an absolute luxury.

Just to clarify, I am not a contractor. The company I work for is a contractor to the big oil companies (we build offshore platforms for the likes of BP, Agip, CevronTexaco, etc.) The company (if you haven't guessed already) is Halliburton/KBR. I really am curious though. Aren't you in Manchester? What oil company is in Manchester?

Yes, I too know the concept of 11+ hour days. I'm now sitting on overhead waiting for my next fun and exciting project. So just do the normal full time schedule. But, if I do work overtime, I get paid for it, so that's always nice. Don't mind working extra for extra pay.

Congratulations Mirage on being given the go ahead for a home birth!

Never fancied it myself, I'm with you Tea on all the 'clearing up' afterwards!! Plus, dp would never allow it, having done a years hospital stint in Obs and Gynae and seeing things go wrong very, very quickly.

I totally agree with you Uwila about the cot being for sleep only. I'm like that about all bedrooms really, in a feng shui kind of way. Bedrooms are for relaxing, sleeping and a wee bit of nookie from time to time I wont allow dp to read medical journals in bed, especially those with colour pictures And the other rule we have is, if you can't sleep, get out of bed !!! As soon as it becomes a place not associated with sleep it's not a good thing.

I also don't think travel cots are intended for long term use. If you do want to use one, get a proper cat standard matress for it. But really, they're not that attractive are they? Why would you want one to use permanently? We have one that we use for w/e's away etc. and it's great, easy to put up etc. but she is already almost too long for it. If you choose a cot bed it will last from, hypothetically, birth, to well into toddler-dom, 2.5 yrs. Well worth the money. Our travel cot I think is a Graco and cost about £50 from new, we've also got our moneys worth with that 10 times over.

Lippy - I don't know, I think I was just having a panic at the time when I was looking at the wooden cots. I couldn't figure them out - the sides didn't seem to drop down on many of them, and of the couple that did, the bed was so high up I thought the baby could fall out - and to such a distance! I had a brief look at the moses baskets on stands, and they seemed so unstabel and wobbled around all over the place. I could understand the travel cots though, they just looked soft and safe.

Happy Birthday Lippy Did you get anything nice?? Are you an aquarius then? I think so though I am not sure. I must confess the first thing I did on finding out baby due date was check the star sign. Hope you have a good day.

I got a Hauck travel cot in a sale cos it was so cheap and pooh bear - it comes with a mattress and is cot sized. I dunno though - I do want a cotbed but I am debating it. I think I may order it after the birth - Cos I have the moses basket and the travel cot to tide me over before I make a decision. I might decide to not get a cotbed and filch a cot off a friend - I just don't want to waste money on an Italian cotbed that I might just go off - not to mention have to build myself.

By the way, anyone's dp/dh got the potential to be a real arse ??? I refused to get cross on my birthday, especially since dp has been so great (by the way, he always makes me our traditional, family birthday cake and a home made card with photos of dd!!).

But ! My dp seems incapable of taking off his work shirt at night without leaving; the sleeves rolled up, all the buttons done up, and the latest one today, leaving cufflinks on...
Said cufflinks (his deceased father's), went through the wash and ended up in the filter of the drier. When I pulled out the filter, one stayed caught in it, the other fell into filter-oblivion Anyway, I said a few Mtha F*ers and went about my daily business

Oh Charley - cots are giving me a headache too and all the easy breath matress, sprung matress, foam matress - if the bed is the right specification for fitted sheets - it is giving me a bloody headache. Do the sides drop - god damn I just want a baby bed that isn't too ugly doesn't cost a fortune - doesn't involve me putting it up. But then I want it to match the other furniture in the nursery (if you can call it a nursery) so I have been going around looking for birch and it doesn't seem very popular. Also I don't want to get into sitting around painting stain onto all the furniture to make it match.

Pink, if you get a second hand cot, I would still recommend a new mattress. It's true, you wont know your needs until baby's here, but sometimes if you wait too long, you miss a lot of usefulness i.e. if you decided your boy does need a cot bed after all when he is 10 months old, that's practically a whole year of it's usefulmess gone iykwim?? ANyway, don't fret too much, it's only a cot. By the way, you wont need to buy a cot until baby is born anyway and then you can put it up without straining yourself. We bought ours when dd was 3-4 months old.

Charley, our cot has 2 positions for the floor, neither of them too high so the baby could roll out, but I have seen those ones, saves bending down I guess. Have you looked at Mamas and Papas? I didn't bother looking too hard, just wanted plain beech wood type look, just got the M&P catalogue and ordered it.

on the travel cot front, we used the proper cot mattress in it when DD was sleeping in it at home permenatly, the flimsy thing that came with it is only really good for a few nights. The reason we did it is because DD was waking up because she was hitting her head on th wooden bars and the travel cot has nice soft mess sides.

Lua like me works at a uni and the extras packages are great, i though my maternity leave package was good 18 weeks fell 8 weeks SMP but lua is very lucky with her 26 weeks full pay

Okay Pink, first and foremost... STOP DOING DIY. That include putting cots together and staining them (anything not water based you shouldn't be breathing anyway).

My thought on cots...
1- The mattress should have at least two positions. While baby is very young he/she gets elevated so you can pick him up more easily, without damaging your back -- a must have feature immediately post caesarean. Then, when kiddie learns to sit youlower it all the way down until they learn to climb out. And then you put them into a bed. Or if you have another one sooner, you may banish the first one to a bed so new baby can have cot. DD is going to have this experience on Friday. Wish me luck!

2- Dropping sides are not essential, but handy.

3- As for mattresses, I NEVER understood the need for a really posh all natural or spring mattresses. I am certain the baby will not care. I would go for el cheapo foam variety.

4- Good point on making sure mattress is standard size. You want sheets to fit. Check the same thing if you buy a moses basket.

yeah new mattresses are essential - though no gaps down the edges. Honestly I can't keep up with the do's and don'ts. I'm sitting eating a ham sandwich which is a no no cos its lunch meat. Honestly they do make a bit of a fuss. I think I'll wait with the cot because of said headache. But I'll probably end up getting one delivered from ebay afterwards. Needless to say I am on the putor intending on working on an assignment though it isn't really happening. Anyhow take care all!

Ok Uwila I am stopping the diy I have basically finished now anyway. Besides the bump doesn't really like me beding down anymore.

For dd's cot we use Mothercare's... ummm not brushed cotton, more like flannel, although I don't think that's what they call them. They are lovely and never get cold in the Winter!

we used mothercare sheets for the cot, thats another plus for our travel cot the regular cot sheets fit it and we didn't have to spend more money on square ones for the travel cot

Oops Lippy - does he know yet? Are your sure you can't get it out? or better still, get dp to get it out? Maybe you (or he) could give the manufacturers a ring to find out? Mine is equally annoying - he always leaves tissues in his jeans pockets and sometimes I miss them - put them through a dark wash....

Pink I haven't got anywhere near mattresses yet! I can't bare it! If a cot doesn't have drop down sides I know for sure I won't be able to bend over far enough to do the bedding (old back injury and being a short ar*se). I cerainly don't envy those of you trying to get stuff to match - I think I'll try to get all mine together...

Are the multi-positional cots easy to lower/raise when baby's in it?

Definitely not, Charley. You have to take baby out, and basically take the bloody thing apart to drop the floor of the cot. For this reason, I can't understand the benefit of more than 2 levels. Just need a high and a low. Ours was put toggether high upp, and dropped down once. We have a M&P Amelia Cot. Perhaps other cots are different?

Charley, the lazy got can get the flipping cufflink himself when he comes home !!!

You will definitely need a drop-down side Charley, it's much more comfortable to lean in when it's down and at the mo I can't lean in unless it is. I'm not sure about the level of the floor, I have a sneaking suspicion you would have to dimantle the cot, although I can't be sure, we had ours on the lowest from the start. However, you'd only need to do it once.

Am thinking about my lunch....