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May 2017 #9 3rd trimester!

959 replies

Rustler74 · 27/02/2017 10:10

Hello all! Now to find a way to guide you to the new thread...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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savagehk · 28/02/2017 08:41

Hi sanity - ask away :)

Rustler74 · 28/02/2017 08:53

Hello and welcome SanitysSake!
Seriously have you read last 2 threads??? The rants aren't getting better and us stuffing our faces on all sorts won't get better surely.

Baby show coming up this weekend. I'm going on Sunday and have asked OH to sort us a picnic which I'm quite looking forward to! We tend to do that when going to the Zoo as well, and how could this be any different?
Now we have dismissed the idea of buying a pram secondhand we are possibly putting way too much hope into doing that deal at the baby show.

I'm definitely more hormonal again these days, getting terribly annoyed with insensitive remarks on social media etc. About any subject really! And yesterday was a terrible day as I was very short of breath again until after a short afternoon nap. My back still hurts so going to attempt another swim today. I wish I had the ability to swim slowly but last time I was swimming breast stroke at double the pace of another lady in my lane, although taking up half the space of her doing (very) freestyle! I wish she had the practical mind to at least wait until I'd done my turning before setting off again! See, can't be good for my blood pressure.

OP posts:
KLane · 28/02/2017 09:15

Rustler We've got the same hope pinned on a discounted Kiddy Evo-Luna car seat at the baby show. Hopefully going on the Sunday means they'll be more inclined to give a bit?

I'm starting a hospital bag list on my phone but am a bit perplexed as to how much to pack. The birthing centre says that in some cases, families are sent home just 6 hours after birth. I have to think that's a bit optimistic, but maybe it's not far off the norm? Experienced mums, is one night a reasonable average expectation, knowing that it could be longer should everything not go smoothly?

savagehk · 28/02/2017 09:16

Bought the car seat online on Sunday evening (after checking the colour with OH). I really liked the colour we had last time, but they don't do it any more (part black, part red) and the all red one didn't do it for me. So we have purple! It's due to be delivered today. Just need a few more clothes for baby and to check the pile of nappies from last time (reusable) and we're set!
(and to pack my birth bag - as hoping for home birth we won't call it a hospital bag, and a few bits / bobs for labour. Still on the fence re birthing pool - largely as I'm not sure in which house I'll be birthing!)

savagehk · 28/02/2017 09:21

klane yes, that's normal. If you had a 'normal' birth (no theatre), baby is feeding, there's been a wet nappy and there's someone there to sign the discharge forms, that's the expected wait.

I had my first in theatre just before 3am, we were on the ward by 6am, I wasn't discharged until about mid afternoon the next day. Most of the delay was finding someone to discharge me/baby (they wanted a paediatric check before discharge but no paeds on duty on Sunday). I think with a c-sec they only like keeping you in 2 days or so max if everything OK.

Depending on your hospital OH may well not be permitted to stay with you continually post birth (or it may just not be set up for it even if he is - nowhere to sleep for instance) so you could pack a smaller bag and leave it at home with more spare clothes / food in case you need a longer stay, he can then just come and fetch that bag if needed when he goes home for a nap!

peasandquiet · 28/02/2017 09:34

Morning all. Please no talk of food until 11am I'm bloody starving mid way through GTT, enjoying a good bit of people watching in the waiting room 😂 There is a teeny baby here, just want to go squish him!!
Welcome sanity, I was like that first time around, I didn't buy anything I would later go on to actually need but the baby had a brill teddy collection and plenty of books !
Also looking forward to the baby show this weekend. Time for my husband to engage a bit more with the fact or family is expanding.
Hope it's sunny for all of you this morning.

EsmesBees · 28/02/2017 09:39

Klane I was sent home 24 hrs after going in. We had to wait longer as they needed her blood group in case I needed another anti-d. They were like a well oiled machine with all the newborn checks so we could have gone home much earlier.

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 09:43

Hello savagehk. Hello Rustler!

Yes, I did indeed read the last two threads. I know, call me crazy. Grin

It cemented in my mind that I do indeed have no bloody idea what I'm doing. No idea in what order things should be done/organised/purchased. No idea what core items I really need. Am just bumbling about, winging it, probably not reading the 'baby books' I should do. If there are indeed 'bible like' baby books out there? Haven't even booked the antenatal course yet. Just generally being rubbish.

Just wondered, has anyone ever come across a concise list (timeline) of what things need to happen/be purchased and in what order? I guess i've taken my foot off the gas with all this as the information is so disparate and all over the bloomin' place. I find it incredibly frustrating (boring/overwhelming).

So far, I have purchased:

Pushchair
Carrycot
Carseat and Isofix base
Co-sleepeing bedside crib thing. (no sheets or blankets or anything yet)
Feeding bottle set with microwave steriliser and other scrubbing bits.
Electronic bottle maker
Electric bottle warmer
Electric bottle steriliser
One pack (3) of long sleeve sleepsuits
One pack (3) of short sleeve vest type things
One 0-3 month outfit
One 3-6 month outfit
One 6-9 month outfit.
2 packs of small muslin squares
2 packs of large muslin squares.

And a partridge in a pear tree.....

If anyone could help me more effectively populate this list, I would greatly appreciate it.

As of this morning, I've turned my attention (after reading the previous threads) to my hospital bag. Enough to give me a coronary! Confused

Adventuregame · 28/02/2017 09:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

vanilla8 · 28/02/2017 09:55

Hi sanity and welcome to the most busiest thread ever Grin

You are not the only one feeling like that. I have Amazon prime and will probably use that to buy anything I've forgotten once baby is here!

We have not got the car seat yet, still so unsure as I have a little fiat 500 and the husband has a bigger car. Will probably just get the one isofix base but not sure which one!

Looking forward to the baby show to help decide, will make sure phone is charged so we can google and compare prices before making the purchase. I have seen some 2015 uppababy vista and car seat deals for 799 online so will see if they can beat that.

Had a sleepless night , insomnia back again Confused

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 09:56

Hey peasandquiet - that's good to hear! Glad I'm not alone!

And thank you Adventuregame for the list. Good place to start!

Adventuregame · 28/02/2017 10:03

Reposting photo as previous had a personal letter underneath ! Doh !

May 2017 #9 3rd trimester!
savagehk · 28/02/2017 10:16

To be honest, some 'essentials' are 'essential' for some people and a complete waste of time for others.

For a newborn:

You need
(1) some means of transporting baby.

(a) If you drive or are driven by friends you need a car seat. If you only ever taxi or public transport you do not, although it would be safer to use a car seat in a taxi, and infant seats are easy to strap in with just a seatbelt.
(b) if you walk a lot, a pushchair or a sling. IMHO a sling is invaluable anyway as most newborns don't like being put down and a sling means you can carry/calm them while still having hands and not worrying about dropping them.

(2) somewhere for them to sleep

SIDS guidelines have them in a crib/moses basket in your room. You need a new mattress if you buy second hand.
If you are able to cosleep safely (no one smokes, no drugs, see other things online...), that's also an option. A cosleeper cot is useful in such cases, but not necessary, and you can bodge a normal cot to work instead, taking care there are no gaps or differences in height between the two.

If your house is big or on two levels, consider something for them to sleep in downstairs too, perhaps a second moses basket or move the existing one downstairs daily.

You'll need a blanket of some description (breathable and not too warm) or a baby sleeping bag (nnb, suitable from birth) to keep them warm.

(3) clothes for them to wear

Babies come out in all sorts of different sizes and shapes. Clothes are equally stupidly sized, different brands are wildly different. Don't buy too much smaller stuff as you may not use it and if you can resist don't wash / depackage too many things so you can return for a bigger size if you don't use it. Friends / family may also give you loads, especially if you know others who've had babies. Sicky babies can go through lots of clothes, non-sicky babies less so.

The 'rule of thumb' is 1 extra layer than you, but our first sweated if we tried that (and he was a December baby!) so that lasted less than a week. We weren't particularly fond of vests either as they were more of a faff than necessary.

Don't forget hats (although hopefully our babies are born in warmer weather :) ) and socks or footed sleepsuits/trousers. If socks, Trumpette (seem to be a shortage, hope they haven't gone insolvent!) don't fall off, or use sock-ons.

(4) things to catch the poo / wee

Nappies, reusable or otherwise. Don't buy too many of one type until you know they work for you otherwise you'll end up with loads of nappies that leak. A bin/wetbag to put them in.

Wipes, but at first cotton wool. Reusable wipes are fabulous IMO.

We didn't need any sudocreme or anything like that.

(5) feeding

(a) If you're intending to breastfeed, you need nothing extra for baby at first. Later you can consider expressing. If you're worried you may not be able to feed from the start but would still like baby to have breastmilk, you can get a pump, but most hospitals will help you out with pump hire if that's the case, and their kit is often more impressive / robust anyway.
(b) If you're intending to formula feed, you're outside my area of expertise....
(c) muslins to wipe up sick / drool / spillage. Again some babies are tidier than others. Ours was tidy.

(6) things for you

(a) Bigger, comfier underwear for post birth. It needs to accommodate the massive maternity pads, and not be too tight if you are sore/stiches. (also said maternity pads)
(b) Earth Mama Angel Baby 'bottom spray' (redundant if you have a c-sec) - this is expensive but I loved it and buy it for all pregnant friends (weird I know)
(c) Lansinoh nipple cream if you're intending to bf (although I bought two tubes last time and never even opened them, so perhaps just prep OH with where to get it from at any hour of day or night if you do need it rather than buy, as it was about £10 a tube last time I bought!)
(d) breast pads

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 10:48

savagehk Thank you so much - that was brilliant!!!

I am so glad to have it written down by a mum so I can read the particular bit about newborn items and them sometimes not fitting. We've already been told our baby is a long/big one.. So I have been 'debating' with the other half that buying anything of that size would be ridiculous for us, as our bean is likely to be bigger than the maximum newborn weight and most definitely longer. He's 6ft 3/4 and I'm over 5ft 10.

And as they say... 'you don't get mice from rats' Grin

Seriously though, thank you. That was incredibly helpful. x

RasperryInAMelon · 28/02/2017 10:50

Massively over sensitive pregnant hormonal woman over here today! 🙋🏼

Share an office with a colleague who has no tact about anything and is generally just rude, feeling like I have no patience for her today 🙈

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 10:54

Awww, RasperryInAMelon - take a break from being around the grotbags. Bit of fresh air? Maybe a chocolate or three? :)

And a bit of an edit. My partner is 6ft 3-4 Not, as I wrote it, 6ft and 3/4 inches. Which wouldn't make him particularly tall!

teainbed · 28/02/2017 11:05

The stuff and lists are so variable. You're either a planner and want everything just in case or not, in which case you'll be happy to get things as you need them and it's pretty easy these days with Amazon/Boots/supermarkets.

Few random things that I thought of recently were low watt lightbulb for lamp in bedroom for all the night feeds, second changing mat or towel with small amount of changing stuff right by the bed, mug style thermos cup for hot drinks and tray set up with tea, biscuits in kitchen so all the visitors can help themselves and wash up after!

Hospital antenatal clinic this afternoon for me so I'll be catching up properly later when I'm bored and in the waiting room. Grin

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 11:28

Thanks teainbed - makes a lot of sense.

Couple of random questions to the floor... If I've got a co-sleeper, would I drag the baby over and change them on the bed, or try and do it IN the co-sleeper?

Second, as far as 'changing bags' go - what makes a good one? What do you normally stock in one?

Autumnsweater · 28/02/2017 11:45

Hi Sanity!

Don't panic too much - you've already bought more than me!

I have so far a car seat, Moses basket, some muslins and cellular blankets, a pack of newborn nappies and the size up, a pack of 0-3 onesies, breast pads, nipple cream and sanitary towels. A friend has promised me a big bag of newborn clothes that she hardly used as bought too much so I'm wary of doing the same, she's also going to lend me some bottle/pump/steriliser stuff so I can see if I use/like it. I'm not stressing, shops are still open when baby is here and as I haven't a clue what I'm doing really I'm sure my purchases will make more sense once baby arrives Grin. That's my philosophy anyway.

savagehk · 28/02/2017 11:47

We bought a changing table, largely because I was worried if I had a c-section I wouldn't be able to bend much. I know others have said they are a waste of time but we got good use out of ours and will be using one again -it's also a good place to store the nappies etc. As it was, I didn't have a c-section but bending was an issue anyway as your stomach muscles haven't knitted back together yet so you have no core strength and it's easy to put your back out. Follow the 'make sure you're sitting comfortably, well supported' advice everyone trots out, I nearly did my back in!

Changing bags - at first, mat, nappies, wipes, sudocreme etc if needed, place to put the dirty nappies (you may need to change on the run where there are no bins, or if you're reusable obvs you want to take it back with you!). A full change of clothes is a good idea in case of poonami. Later, also snacks/water for baby. A dedicated change bag is useful as it means whoever is going out with baby grabs it on the way out, alternately there are the bag-inserts that you can use instead.

I liked the look of the pacapod but concluded it was too small. I got a baby mule as I wanted a backpack style (two shoulders better than one!) plus big enough to put other things of my own into it (I don't usually have a handbag). If you already have a suitable bag, this is a good idea to use inside www.babymule.co.uk/View-the-Range/essentials-kit-red

Badgerbird · 28/02/2017 11:49

bean I Love Ezra Daniel :)
We've got 2 names at the mo. One is more relaxed than the other iykwim so will prob use both but wait till she's born to see what suits her most.

Thanks teaspoon grow jw, it was stressful but funny Grin

lullaby, shit! 11 wknds!!!! My face is also like Shock I'm gonna count my wknds now.....

Great to meet you sanity!! And big congratulations!! It is a bit crazy overwhelming isn't it but bloody brilliant all at the same time Smile Oh just read your second post, you sound super organised to me!!!!

Ooh I love the lists savage and adventure! Bookmarked.

savage I like the name birth bag, good idea! I've still got to look into birthing pools. Anyone used one at home before??

Badgerbird · 28/02/2017 11:52

So I just counted and we have 13 wknds till edd. We are however working every wknd in March ShockShock

SanitysSake · 28/02/2017 11:54

Thanks, Autumnsweater!

Yes, I am panicking a bit. One thing from your list that is jumping out and hitting me in the head like a Homer Simpson 'D'oh!' is nappies! I haven't got any?!!

As for getting things when you need them.. Yes, is does make sense. I guess I'm panicking about whether I have the absolute basic necessities to life!

One thing that did stop me in my tracks recently, was someone in a shop saying 'No, you shouldn't have bumpers around your cot or anything else in it, as it linked to causing SIDS'.. Then I looked around the shop and all i could see were bumper sets and mobiles and all that? Why are people selling them, if they're not considered very good for a young child?

savagehk · 28/02/2017 12:04

I had one last labour and did use it for a few hours before they made me go to hospital! In hindsight I probably got in it too soon. We hired it, but the place we hired from doesn't seem to exist any more, although there are others. Ours was a 'birth pool in a box'. I did feel much better in the water, and got in the pool at the MLU when we got there.

lullaby23 · 28/02/2017 12:19

Welcome sanity. Sounds like you're doing well so far. Agree with the bumpers etc I guess they are pretty but seems a bit daft if you can't use them until a year! DS has made up for lost time now and has at least 10 toys and a pillow in his cot now Grin

I only bought 0-3 clothes last time which were a bit big to begin with. I am going to buy a few up to 1 month bits this time as DC is tracking smaller and will come out at about 38 weeks so likely to be lighter.

Glad I'm not the only one counting down the weekends! Just trying to think of jobs I need DH to do and it's not that much time to get things out of storage and sorted out if we do a bit each week.

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