Late December - Early January Thread 2!

[Bella1985]

Hi! We're on to our 2nd thread for babies due at the end of December/Early January. 3rd trimester is in sight...!

With 2 you realise it's a smidgen easier the first time with only one however it's easier with 2 in that you have already been through it once so experience is on your side.

Bella, Iv felt bad taking food deliveries from family & friends but I think sometimes they like being useful & helping by doing something. If she wants to help then rest up & take it. Sounds like he's sleeping better than my DD.

Lastnight was bad sleep wise. She has fed on & off all day. Just woken for another feed so hoping she'll now sleep for s good chunk of time so I can sleep. Feeling pretty wiped out now.

I feel that with 2 it's harder and easier in equal measure. Do you find that emz serial? I find it is hard because there's the older one to run after - I had a particularly bad night with baby screaming his head off at the boob (I think he's having a growth spurt and frustrated when milk slows towards the end) and DD sobbing because she got woken by baby. Argh. But it's easier because the older one is living proof that there's light at the end of this, albeit very long, tunnel.
bella I would just accept the help. i think people in general would like to help, otherwise they wouldn't have offered. I've not cooked or cleaned or done the preschool run over the last 2 weeks, my in laws have very kindly taken those tasks off me. They have visited before and I've done everything for them so I think they know that I'm really tired at the moment. Since having DD I definitely believe in outsourcing... so have kept some childcare for DD so the in laws get a break too and my cleaner still comes in once a week. Despite all the help I still feel beat so I don't know how you managed to clean as well...

My biggest concern at the moment is meeting everyone's emotional needs. I get very introverted when pregnant, and the past month with being overdue and having had the baby I've struggled to pay attention to anyone but me. It's understandable in a way, but life doesn't stand still and I had to apologise to my teenaged DD last night for not listening and being there for her as much as I'd like. I was all weepy about it, then I later went out for a bit to take the baby to a social gathering and one of the ladies there called me "supermum" and said she really admired me, and I burst I to tears again! Because I don't feel super at all, just scrabbling about trying to get by and feeling like it's not quite working right. Lucky for me my teenager is a sweetheart and we smoothed things over, and I'm not so weepy after a nice long nap this morning. Having dh home this week has been wonderful, but next week he's back to work. Too soon!

Sorry, I'm rambling. I'm not trying to be all woe is me or compare my life to someone else's. I'm generally happy and content, but sometimes things get on top of me!

Let it out serial - we need a good woe is me moan every now and then and if there's anyone who understands, its others going through the same things. You're lucky to have an understanding DD, I'm sure they can see that you're doing your best and that it will pass and you'll be able to spread your attention a bit more evenly soon.

I've just hit a new personal low - I cried on the phone to the midwife. She asked me how I'm doing, we've had a particularly bad night with no sleep, lots of wind, a mucus choke/cough thing, and a couple of sick episodes and so I just cried when she asked me. I hate being so emotional. I come from a 'deal with it' sort of background and don't normally crack so easily so this is really annoying me.

Thanks for the encouragment everybody - it's one good night, 2-3 bad ones at the moment, so I'm trying to focus on the good ones and remind myself that more of them will come soon!

Better nights will come! Can't promise a timeline, unfortunately. :). and all around, I think.

I find myself really snappy after the bad nights. Night before last was really bad, couple of snatched 45 mins. Felt so rough. Just managed to snatch a bath, followed midwives advice on some lavender oil in some milk & pour under hot water. It's helped my stitches. They were really tight yesterday & today I can barely feel them. Feel bit better today but had more sleep. This part is really hard but I do know it gets easier & the cuddles are lovely.

DD has jaundice. I noticed it quite quickly (DS suffered terribly in Nicu & was always having light treatment), midwife is coming back this afternoon to check it's getting better & not worse. DH just changed her pooey nappy, mid change she started being sick, then she weed & then she farted & pooed. His face was hilarious Gotta love the funny moments.

Haha emz the triple threat!

We were debating this morning if DS had made the stains on the wall above the changing table but DH was saying no way can he pee that far...and just to prove me right DS goes ahead and pees mid nappy change and hits a very high mark on the wall, much to DHs surprise!!

The cuddles are lovely indeed, and am treasuring every one of them, even though my eyes might be stinging with want of sleep!

Hope the jaundice isn't too bad. DS was yellow in hospital but when tested it wasn't high enough to require treatment, he's back to normal now.

The midwife thinks it's clearing up & I think so too. The cuddles do make it hard not to fall asleep at 4am. Iv been playing games & shopping for new clothes to keep myself awake. Parcels keep arriving & DH hasn't said much after I just pointed out it was that or I fall asleep. I feel so tired & still got the night shift

Good night lastnight & I feel amazing. We both slept 9.45-1.30 & then 3-7. She's had a feed & gone back to sleep. Registering her birth today & got her baby hearing test. Hoping the snow & ice isn't too bad. Feel a bit weird about registering today with it being Friday 13th. Stupid superstition!

Oh emz that sounds like a lovely long sleep (oh how our benchmark has changed pre and post pregnancy). So far the longest DS is managing is 4.5h (last night), so I got about 3.5h sleep after his feed. But more often than not he's doing max 4h in the night.
Our registration appointment is on 24th. We haven't narrowed down our long list yet although I have a gut feeling about the "right" name. Such a weight of responsibility this naming business. But maybe that's bc my parents gave me an unusual name, I would not inflict that on my children.

We haven't yet managed more than an hour it two through the night yet. Hoping it's the start of it settling but experience tells me not to expect it again. I'll take it as it helps keep you going. Well when DS was born I had an instinct & announced his name (we had a shortlist of 2) within minutes, DH agreed (due to me having just given birth). This time we had 3 girls names. I announced I disliked my choice on the list, DH chose her name out of the last 2. I wasn't as convinced but he was keen. It's a family name that's classic & has options. Iv got a very classic name so I think it's a good choice. It is really hard. I had fallen in love with DS' name before he was born & still love it. It's a bit different this time but it's growing on me.

I refuse to look at a clock in the middle of the night. It drives me crazy to know how many times I've woken, for how long, etc. We are cosleeping, so at least I don't have to get out of bed for feeds.

My 3yo dd was nameless for a few days after birth - so stressful! We settled on a nice name in the end but ugh. Naming another human is hard.

We're registering DS on Monday. We had 2 names we shortlisted after my waters broke and decided to test them both out once he arrived. My fave was the first one we tested and that's the one we've gone for! So glad he was a boy as I wasn't sure about our final girl names!

It would be so nice if I could forget about my want/need for sleep. I feel like I'm not fully appreciating every second with DS as I'm fixating on time and how many hours I've slept!

Anyone else with a windy baby? DS has started to suffer quite badly with trapped wind and our burping efforts don't seem to be very effective...poor baby...

Bella, have you tried infacol? We used it with DS & it worked wonders. Haven't needed it with DD as she winds so easily. Names are really difficult. Iv had a lot of compliments about it though, it's starting to stick. We are having some photos taken on Monday which will go with the bump photos we had done. Really hoping they come out ok. Will be nice to get DS involved, he loves his sister so much. He tells me when she's crying & tells me to pick her up. He also likes to hold her hand.

I think it's fairly normal to get obsessed over sleep. We certainly are. DD has just woken having been asleep since 9.30. Hoping after a big feed she will go back to sleep for a few hours.

That's so sweet of your DS emz! Thanks for the tip on infacol, I think I'll look in to it. I had a look yesterday at gripe juice and that's not suitable for babies under 1 month.

DS didn't sleep last night at all from 9pm until 5am. And only had broken sleep 5am-7am and 7.30-9am. He was then awake until midday being grisly and hungry and he's finally asleep now. Thankfully we haven't got anyone calling in to see us today but boy this is tiring! He's having dirty and wet nappies and isn't displaying any obvious signs of illness so I think we just have a very fussy baby who may have colic

Have you considered a sling? DS has been fussy and unsettled today, not wanting to sleep unless held. We managed to get him through a family photo session, and now he's flat out in a sling, snuggled right up with me. I can do most things (toileting is tricky but doable, eating means crumbs on baby's head sometimes...) and DS stays happy. I'm a big believer in 4th trimester theory.

I think you can use infacol from birth. Most parents I know have used it & I think all pharmacies & supermarkets stock it. It really helps them with wind. DD is a bit gripey when she has trapped wind. Iv laid her down before and stretched her legs out before pushing them back towards her tummy. It helps release wind & it's worked in her. I don't think they recommend gripe water anymore but I don't know why. We have had 1 night like that it's really hard. Hope you get some rest today.

Slingy baby.

I used infacol from 3wks with DD. I think it's suitable from birth. It helped with her wind somewhat. I have friends who swear by colief - it breaks down the lactose in milk to make it more easily digestible so less tummy trouble.
I sling DD a lot btw 3-12weeks so she could catch up on sleep and be less overtired, but I had one of those structured slings which didn't sit very well on my small frame. This time I have the close Caboo and it's way more comfy. I would thoroughly recommend. One of the mw advised that I go out for fresh air once a day so I try to sling DS and go for a walk during one of his nap. Apparently the closeness should help bonding - I'll do anything to reduce fussiness in the evening!

Thanks for the advice. There's a sling meet in my city so I think I'll go to that next week as you can try various slings. I have no idea what might work for me.

Whenever I hold him to try and soothe him to sleep he just starts rooting for milk, he won't settle to sleep on me unless he's had a lot of milk first.

Hopefully infacol and a sling might help.

I love my close caboo too. We got it for DS as he had severe reflux & also it was the only sling we could safely use with him as he was prem & tiny. Iv also got the ergobaby 360 for when DD gets a bit bigger. I found the caboo not as comfy as DS got heavier.

I think DD has reflux too. She wasn't sick at all first few days but it's got progressively worse. We have just been through 3 sets of clothes where she was violently sick an hour after her feed. It was lumpy & acidic plus it came out with so much power it squirted out her nose causing us both alarm! I'm hoping it's nothing more serious. She's sleeping soundly on me but I am shattered!

Hi everyone! Hope you're all surviving. I think my DS has reflux too - possibly silent reflux? He seems to bring fluid up but isn't actually being sick much - he swallows it back down. He's suddenly developed a dislike of being on his back, poor thing. I'm using infacol and also I've put a blanket under the mattress at he head end of his Moses basket, both of which have helped a little. And I've got a lactation consultant coming tomorrow to see if there's something I can do about the way he's guzzling at the boob to help him suck in less air, but if that doesn't work I guess it's straight to the doctor. Sigh.

bella I have the baby k'tan sling which is he one that's really easy to put on . DS loves it! We also have an ergobaby but I haven't used that much yet. Definitely recommend the k'tan, DS loves snuggling up and I love having him there.

Hope the consultant helped Stealth. We had to stop using infacol with DS as it made his reflux so much worse. Glad it's been working for you. I'm seeing the HV tomorrow & MW on Wednesday. Hoping that DDs weight has crept up. If I can keep her weight up then I won't worry about reflux medication. Her reflux was much worse the other night after I drank half a glass of champers. Wondered if that affected my milk & upset her. I did notice diet affecting DS before.

We had a busy day today - school run, shopping, registrar appointment, nursery collection, quick lunch, out to a party, back in time to meet the midwife, school run again, and collapse.

Poor DS was utterly fed up with all to to-ing and fro-ing. On the plus side he is a Real Boy now (birth certificate and everything!) and his weight looks good.

That's incredibly busy serial! I'm finding this whole thing really hard, managing to get to our Registrar appointment on time and back was all we could do. Spent the rest of the day asleep, feeding and washing baby clothes!

How are things stealth? DS is also suffering from reflux. He's currently asleep in my arms but so far tonight, everytime I've put him down on his back in his crib he vomits within 15-30 mins. He seems really tired but lying on his back (the head end of the chicco crib is raised) just isn't working for him

'Surviving' is definitely the word for this period in time..!