October 14. Thread 12. Still no babies? Let the raspberry leaf tea drinking commence

[YellowWellies]

New Fred

Interesting reading about the breast feeding I've never been that successful with it and I remember sobbing whilst giving dd a bottle of formula I had all these crazy thoughts in my head about mad people may have tampered with the milk and what would I do if I couldn't get hold of formula the baby would starve!
I think breast feeding would be so so much easier to establish if you hadn't just had a baby, I know that sounds ridiculous but you are trying to do something new and sometimes a bit tricky while you are sore, sleep deprived,hormonal and trying to figure out what to do with this brand new tiny human being!!
Think Mother Nature is having a laugh I bet the breast feeding success rates would be a lot higher if you didn't have to master it till they were three!

My lovely midwife actually laughed out loud when she saw me today and said she didn't think her tape measure would be long enough to measure me.

Ha ha thanks for that :) she was right though I'm measuring 42cms and I'm 34+3 I actually look ridiculous now people are doing double takes when they see me. Will try and post a picture later :)

shire I also know three others like you who tried desperately hard to bf but still couldn't for various reasons (including low supply, too small nipples) I know I'm lucky that I could bf ds and I hope I am lucky again for it to work this time.

Anyone signed wanting to use reusable nappies, Emma's Diary are doing a discount code for a miosolo bambino for just p+p of £4.99. Not if it will work if I share, do you think it will be a different code per email address?

Yes please binky is it on the app? Or on an email?

Thank you for you BF post yellow, i don't think its explained enough to new mums just how hard it is but also that is gets easier!

Shire, we were very close to DS being admitted to hospital too which is why we switched to formula. I remember refusing to feed him his first bottle & getting DH to do it. i can remember actually being angry with DS for rejecting me & worrying he wouldn't know i was his mummy because he could get milk from anyone now. BF is such an emotional topic, i get upset about it still too. Just want to say all those thoughts were rubbish though, DS is a proper mummas boy now!

mrsb it was by email which is why I'm not sure if the code is unique or not?

Hmm.. all day running to the loo, but nothing else going on. To be honest, the running to the loo bit is actually a massive relief after the last few weeks. Baby is massively excited about the extra room it seems - shifting around all over the place.

Shire - sorry, didn't articulate very well there, was just musing on my own personal reactions, no judgement on how anyone else 'should' feel.

I actually have no idea how I'll react if I can't BF given how bonkers my hormones have been, but have been prepared by friends on both sides of the BF fence for judgement from other parents and HCPs and feel a bit bolshy; every intention of persevering but if I end up miserable with an unhappy baby and FF or mixed feeding solves that I hope I won't be too hard on myself. Though I'll be really pissed off if my boobs don't work as am a natural 36H and would have had a reduction years ago if it weren't for this.

I didn't mean to come across as annoyed or dismissive at your post, SlideIn - sorry if I did! It's just that I didn't contemplate ever not being able to bf; yes, I knew it was hard and likely to be uncomfortable/painful - but the guidance I got beforehand was that you would be able to if you wanted to and worked at it. And when it became apparent that things weren't quite as they should be, and the doctors had to intervene, I totally turned all that into my 'failure' and it took a lot to overcome that.

I understand much more now and am trying to make peace with what happened. Especially as there's a very high probability that I could experience similar issues again.

I too get very defensive over the whole BF / FF feeding thing, it's first DC so never tried but will give it a go. The way it can be rammed down your neck by some people makes me want to just FF feed!

I think a more balanced view needs to be given by MW and HV so if you can't BF that's fine. My entire family have been FF, most of us have great immune systems, brilliant bond with our mothers and are generally pretty clever, which is why the La Lèche book peed me off so much this morning.

Anyway, it's a subject that can get me on my high horse, so I will get down now and go back to whingeing .

Can't believe it has taken me all day to do 2 loads of washing and bake one cake. I think I need to relook at my to do list!

I'm quite 'lucky' in the judgemental department, in that lots of my friends haven't managed to breast feed, or in some cases haven't even tried. My mum spent ages telling my SIL that it wasn't her fault when things didn't work out for her too. Making the choice to formula feed if you're struggling with BF, or really find the thought uncomfortable, is doing the best for your child, which is what being a parent is about.

In fact, because I'm pretty much the last one to breed amongst friends and relations, there are no new judgements to be had.

Until of course we announce that we're planning on going to live in France for 2 years off, and the kid won't be in school for its reception year. HAHAAAA... no doubt that'll cause some raised eyebrows. Cross that bridge if we manage to make it happen.

shire sorry to hear about your experiences with bf, you're right feeding your child whatever way is a hugely emotive topic which is why it is so important not to judge. We are all mothers we need to support each other through this journey. (Not saying anyone on here is judging)

I was also lucky that Ds latched on well but had other issues about the emotional aspect of bf and Ds sleep tha means this time I will not beat myself up if things don't work out as I will introduce a bottle sooner so OH can help.

Just grabbed a bargain on amazon 74 pampers newborn for £5.64 (or near enough) so I bought 2 lots.

Ooh, where in France? I used to live near the Dordogne region, Perigord.

Sorry that post on BF was meant to help newbies not meant to bring up sad memories. It was only there to help those who want to give BF a go by providing a few tips that the BF antenatal information from the NHS just doesn't tell you. I think if you look at Norway where the support for BF is just AMAZING and where over 90+% of women are still BF at six months and compare it to us where it's less than 10% at 6 months you can see that there will always be some folk for whom it just won't work for medical reasons (undiagnosed tongue tie, baby rejecting the breast often related to food intolerance, nipple issues, supply issues), but equally the 80% difference in BF rates also reflects what a difference in support network can achieve. The UK is very good at telling women how great it is to BF (and creating a real guilt complex as a result if it fails) before they have their babies but not so good at actually helping women learn how to BF, and the higher our FF rates get - the fewer women are able to pass these skills on first hand either in a professional capacity or to their daughters, so there is a cultural element too.

Pregnant you are exactly right. It would be so much easier if you didn't have to learn at the exact moment in your life when you feel utterly run over by a bus (emotionally and physically!). Hence the importance of reading about it in advance as you really struggle to take new information in in the days after labour. I think the attitudes of Binky and Goats are really healthy - there are always going to be 10% of women who will physiologically be unable to BF, historically those babies would have died, how lucky we are to have a great alternative to feed and nurture them today.

I completely agree with Yellow's post about breastfeeding. I think it's really important for new mums to be aware that breastfeeding can be really hard for the first while, but can get better if you can ride it out (with the right help). Like Shire I still feel upset when I think about how hard it was. I felt torn between health professionals pushing me to use formula to get dd's weight up, and bf counsellors (and my own feelings of failure) encouraging me to continue bf. I think it would be helpful for breastfeeding lessons to focus on how to overcome problems rather than preaching about the benefits. Our bf counsellor refused to cover expressing in the antenatal class because she didn't think newborns should be bottle fed, and even once it was apparent that dd just couldn't do it, she still insisted that bathing together and plenty of skin to skin would solve it (while dd got hungrier and hungrier and I got more and more stressed!). Thankfully I found a much better bf counsellor who realised there was a problem and gave me some practical help!

Ah ok, was worried I'd caused offence or hurt feeling through poor wording - it's such a sensitive subject.

Wonder how receptive the family centre would be to feedback on the session? Has anyone done this?

me23 Thanks for nappy tip!

:( :( well that's me off the Colin Caterpillars for labour! GD diagnosed. Not caught up with the days news yet. Just wanted to report before I went to supermarket to buy porridge & fish & veg! Any diabetes diet tips, not seeing specialist until next week.

Can I ask question of those suffering from SPD? I've got quite far (36 weeks now) without too much pain but the last few days have left me in agony and I'm finding walking even a short distance really difficult. My commute isn't too far, 5 mins walking to train, 10 min train journey, 8 mins walking to next station, 5 mins train journey and then less than 5 mins walk to work. However I'm finding even this very hard now.

I finish work on 12th September and only have four days between now and then - tomorrow then next Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Have Tues and Thursday off as annual leave. I'm now trying to work out if it would be better to swap days and finish on Wednesday instead or better to have the days off in between to rest. So... question is do those experiencing SPD find that resting helps significantly and therefore would benefit from the two rest days or that it doesn't make much different in long term and better bet is to just finish work earlier? Thanks!

Sorry to hear that excited. No tips from me I'm afraid but feeling for you (and others with GD - sounds just just another horrible thing to deal with when you least need it).

Oh no sorry to hear that excited. I'm afraid I can't give you any food tips but at least they've picked it up and it can be controlled x

Sorry to hear that excited hopefully we don't have long to go.

me I bought 2 boxes of the size 2 this morning. They were around a £1 more but I'm not expecting a small baby given ds weight.

captain i do find my spd is at its worst when im on my feet for more than 20 minz, so i deffo need rest days as much as i can with a 4 year old ... Which consists of watching lots of dvds in bed & me pretending im a patient and she is the doctor... Any excuse to lie on the bed whilst keeping DD entertained

pinkfizz everything was ok thanks for asking

Still loosing greeny yuk which I now think is plug but as it's been coming out for weeks I'm not seeing it as any kind of sign.

I breastfed all mine and will this one to it is very hard work to start with but so worth it if you are able to and have the support.

Welcome aboard the GD train excited it sucks but you soon get used to meat n veg constantly did they tell you your readings?

Diabetic midwife told me if it's white it's bad no white bread no rice only small amounts of pots you can eat lots meat and eggs
Cheese has no effect on me to. It effects everyone differently so just test different foods out. Do you have your testing kit?

I'm sorry to hear that Excited - I'm sorry if I missed this, but was it just a routine referral/test or were you having symptoms of some kind?

I second the rest days captain - this time next week you'll nearly be done and every day becomes a rest day (for a while, anyhow....)

That's annoyed CJ, but at least it's not for long.. thinking positive and all that.