October 2013 - Are we neary *there* yet?!

[MrsHoratioNelson]

Welcome, welcome, sit down, put your feet up.

Spreadsheet here

thank you flyer xx
umlauf thats awful! although your post did make me laugh about your bum swelling. I put on 4 stone with DS and at the time no one mentioned anything. I have eaten the same this time and have so far only put on 1 1/2. I think it must just be pregnancy dependant unless having a different sex of baby has changed my weight gain.
in other news have just treated myself to a gym ball. Desperately hoping its more comfortable than the sofa which leads to feet in the ribs at the moment

Umlauf another one with 3 stone weight gain. I've never been weighed by the mw though. Is the gynae a bloke by any chance?

pink sorry to head what your dh has been up to! I second what others have said an emotional affair would seem worse to me too as not only is he complimenting said woman he is also saying horrible things about what u and him already have together, god knows how u have kept cool all day I would have smashed the iPad over his head by now never mind out the window!

I'm feeling rediculously emotional today like I'm gunna burst into tears at any second! I asked dh the other day if he could take me out for an Indian this evening and to ask his nan to babysit dd as he always goes on we never get out on our own bla bla bla.... So when I just asked when were going turns out he never asked his nan to babysit and when he called to ask she already has plans for this evening so now not only has he let me down but I'm not going out tonight and I now have to cook and I feel like a 90 year old cripple who can't take another 6 weeks 5 days if this

Sorry for the selfish post I just needed a rant at someone lol

One more for you flyer and pink and hope you manage to resolve everything soon. Hope we've been only helpful and empathetic here. My last words would be - don't let anyone push you into any decisions, not even your family and no matter how much you respect them. People may mean really well but noone knows ins and outs of your relationships and what makes you or your partner tick as much as you. We all have different insecurities and consider different things critical. So, cliche as it sounds, listen to your heart and don't ignore your gut instinct. The biggest mistakes I've made in my life were when I ignored my instincts and felt I should take someone's advice because they were wise or they loved me, or they knew the situation better than me etc. Noone knows better than you xx

On the weight front, I haven't weighed myself since 10 weeks midwife booking and don't intend to. I may do on my due date (if I get there...) just for the fun of it I really don't give a damn. I put on 3 stones with DS1 and lost it very quickly. I think it's similar or even more with this baby. I don't care. Will start caring later, if it doesn't go.

And I've also ben feeling a bit nauseous the last week or so - thought it was just me! Nothing major but washing teeth became a nightmare again and made me throw up this morning (was it roxvox who shared this strange toothbrush / toothpaste phobia with me?) I still find it very weird!

I've added another sheet in our spreadsheet (a few people suggested we do) - so we now have one "due dates" sheet and one "births" sheet with pinklady's Josie already there I seem to remember Josie was born on 14th August, two days before pink told us about it... or did she say it was the Wednesday before - on the 7th? Does anyone remember? Not sure she is lurking right now...

Ok - another working day gone. 12 to go... see you later ladies - going to pick up what I expect to be one filthy boy from the holiday club now!

Pink - just thought I'd copy something over from the relationships board for you:

"Do not blame yourself or your sex life. Partners cheat whether they are 'getting it' at home or not and even if they aren't 'getting it' at home or are in anyway unhappy the mature and adult thing to do is talk about the problem, not screw whoever is offering - so no matter which way you look at it, if he is cheating it is HIM that has caused this, HIM that is in the wrong, no matter what."

Just got back from 32 week check up with the gp and I have sugar in my urine which I have never had before. She didn't seem too concerned but I have to bring another sample tomorrow.

My diet has not been great this weekend as we stayed with DHs parents and as they find vegan cooking tricky I take lactase enzyme tablets to help me digest the lactose in dairy. I wonder if the milk sugar I can't process is still in my urine. Also I have eaten a bag of jelly beans and a bag of dairy free fudge over the last week or two so and I don't usually eat sweets at all. I would have thought sugar doesn't stay in the system that long though and today I had a healthy muesli breakfast and stir fry lunch. Hoping it is all clear tomorrow.

flyer and pinkbuttons so sorry you're going through this esp during pregnancy. I think clapham, tucking, pseudo and the other ladies have said it better than I could. for both of you.

Also to p.buttons and flyer I second all the advice the others have given.

First day of mat leave has been ok, been working for my dad today tho which consisted of four hours driving picking up and dropping off motorbike parts. So not the relaxing day I planned but he pays well

Off our tonight to all you can eat with work then its my bday tomorrow so a meal out with family. Think I may burst by the end of the week! Getting my hair done off my parents as their present as wouldn't know what else to spend money on. Definitely by clothes!

Sending and hugs to pink and flyer. I'm so cross with your DPs! Men can be so stupid sometimes. (and women too, but that's beside the point). I think you've been given some really good advice. I also had to do pre-marriage counselling and would recommend couples counselling if you want to try to work stuff through. One thing I took from mine was that marriage wasn't about 50:50, but about both people trying to put in 100% all of the time. It seemed a bit naf at the time, but it was definitely helpful to remember when we had a new baby and were tempted to start getting into the 'who's the most tired' competitions.

I think being totally clear that this is unacceptable behaviour and what you plan to do if it doesn't stop might help. Sometimes people really need stuff spelled out to them.

I'm so sorry that you've had so much stress to go through.

Tarlia sorry you're feeling so miserable. Not too much longer to go now!

I hope you manage to work things out Flyer but don't stay just because you're worried about being a single parent. Linah was only 2 weeks old when I kicked her Dad out and I wish I'd had the strength to do it sooner.

pink and flyer - so sorry to hear about your current situations. Not going to offer any advice because only you know what's best for you xx

Had a bit of a shitty day today, very limited movements and very upset when I got home from work but must have just been a lazy day for baby as he's back to normal now, thank god!

Glad all is better now you have some time to rest untitled.

Ooh hayle careful with the all you can eat, I am certain it was the all you can eat Chinese I had t'other night that is responsible for my stretchmark!!!! Have a great time!!

untitled sorry you had a shitty day, my baby often does that, I like to think its a good sign that they may sleep well when born! Glad you're feeling better now.

Evening All, just placed my Tens machine hire order and feeling like I'm finally on the home-stretch. I had a good session with the Dr this morning who was reassuring all round. Madam is still breach, but again Doc wasn't bothered, plenty of time for her to lock down. She took some swabs to work out what I've been 'leaking' which was also reassuring.

I'm meeting an old (male) friend for lunch tomorrow. In light of all this discussion today I'm going to be very mindful of my behaviour!

Wishing you all good air-clearing chats and peaceful sleeps tonight. xx

I had a swab today, to check for streptococcus in my vagine, apparently if its present they give you a penicillin drip during the birth. Anyone else had this or is it just a weird Spanish thing along with trying to provoke crash dieting ??!

I have heard of strep b being an issue umlauf, not a weird spanish thing, but I haven't been tested for it, I am not sure if they do it routinely or not in the uk.

Pink for boys which tens machine did you go for and where did you rent it from?

Hi ladies, just wanted to thank you all for your support today it has meant so much to me and kept me sane and (mostly calm) Have now had it out with OH and he has apologised a lot and I think realised what he could have lost. He admitted straight away it was for attention. I still cant understand it but am glad hes at least admitted to how stupid it was and feeling awful about it. So were still here, have told him we will have to see how the trust issues resolve, don't want him to get off too lightly and have asked him to text this other woman and apologise to her for being such an arse. He agreed to this straight away and offered to show me so actually feel like he is sorry. Also wanted to thank you all for pointing out the relationship threads, definitely not brave enough to post but puts it all into perspective reading some of the things over there. So although not resolved just wanted to say thankyou and let the thread get back to baby chat :)

Ooh thankyou for reminding me about Tens pink who have you got yours through? I didn't use one last time until got to the hospital but would really like to try it at home this time.

Also sorry you've had a rubbish day untitled glad baby has picked up a bit, umlauf I ended up in hospital pretty much quickly due to no movts with DS, he slept through from 6 weeks and now at age 2 1/2 has 12 hrs each night and 2-3 hr naps, so you might be on to something! I am slightly concerned hes still going to be needing a nap when he starts school though.

Sorry your meal plans didn't work out Natalie surely hell at least get you a takeaway so you don't have to cook?! xx

Umlauf - this isn't routine on the NHS but should be!!! I am many people I know paid for a private strep B swab test (they post it to you, you send it back) and I kept the results with my notes. My consultant (for DD) said that he shouldn't say so but he was so pleased I and many other women got if done privately (I was negative). If it is undiagnosed, it can be v v serious for the baby! Ideal is to also swab the ants, but vagina is key!!!

For anyone else... Please google if you haven't already sent off for the swab test / didn't know about it...

Google gbss.org.uk ...... I used this site last time for links to ordering home testing kit. Not relevant for me thus time as babies aren't exiting via the birth canal!!!!

Swab the ants?!

Oh wow. I'm vair impressed now :-) Makes up for being called a lard-arse again. How frustrating it isn't routine, I wonder how much it costs the NHS to set up little tests like these.

Anus... iPhone doesn't like it! There is serious campaigning but far the NHS or NICE or whoever it is have ignored the hundreds of infections a year....

Oh god, so far...

Umlauf I carry group b strep it was picked up on a routine smear years ago. I was told if I ever got pregnant I was to inform my mw.

I have lots of lovely big ALERT STREB B CARRIER stickers plastered all over my pregnancy notes. And yes in labour I have to have iv anti biotics to avoid my baby becoming exposed to it whilst in the birth canal.

It can cause meningitis, pneumonia bad other serious illness if a baby becomes infected with it.

They indeed don't test for it in the uk, I've no idea why, and so many people have informed me they should, so it's a great thing you have been swabbed.

I also have to stay in hospital for a min of 12 hrs after giving birth to check that the baby is ok and hasn't picked anything up.

Pink and Flyer - lots has been said, so just sending hugs. Trust how you feel. It may be that you know that actually this is a blip and you love the guy(s), in which case trust that. You may actually in your heart think this and the relationship is too wrong, in which case trust that and try to act without fear. Pregnancy and (sorry!) having young children is v v tough on relationships - every lady one of us has gone through or will go through a rocky patch, probably bad enough to think "is this worth it?"... Pink - glad you had a good chat and Flyer worry not about the baby - this stress won't be affecting then x

Thanks for bringing this to my attention umlauf and legally and for the link to information.
I just ordered a free strep b home testing kit here with a vaginal and anal swab and you then pay £35 if you decide to send it off.