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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

March 2014 - Thread 4 - awaiting our dating scans

999 replies

MTBMummy · 13/08/2013 09:40

Stats thread here Here

OP posts:
PramQueen1971 · 16/08/2013 17:16

Liberuna, have you had a name change or summat?

Welcome, Spring.

Imeg · 16/08/2013 17:22

Springbells, I have my scan on Monday too.

Sorry to hear that some of you are having a tough time, I hope things get better.

I am wary of private medical care in general. My two grandmothers had hip replacements at a similar time, one private and one NHS. The NHS one had a much much better experience, with much more support and aftercare.

Beccadugs · 16/08/2013 17:33

Oh pram I'm sorry things are stressful for you. We're all here to listen, hope your Mum is looking after you.

Welcome Springbells!

Sorry you're feeling crap mummypig

I have been feeling terrible for the last couple of days. 12 weeks in Tuesday so hoping it'll start to get better after that.

MummyPig24 · 16/08/2013 17:44

Thank guys you have cheered me up! I've eaten toast and peanut butter, had a snooze and a bath and I'm feeling a whole lot better. I'm going out tonight to meet my friends at the Chinese, as a last supper before M begins her treatment for breast cancer. Hope I don't puke on the prawn crackers!

apprenticemamma · 16/08/2013 17:52

hot cross...I have these and had last time I think..stretching pains. Mummypig hope you get some respite. Got huge respect for sahm but I know just how knackered it can be and i am only part time sahming. DVD and auntie ceebeeb all the way Wink Wink

PiratesMam · 16/08/2013 18:02

Holy crap Pram that's a real shitter. Really glad you've got your mum to go to, having some space is crucial to get some clarity on the sitch. This is the last thing you need, hope you work out what to do for the best. Like Becca said, we are here for support too.

SAHMs I too have been a snappy arsey bint this week. Particularly as have been stuck indoors shovelling DD's shit! I do love being a SAHM but I was always nervous what pregnancy would do to my energy levels; fair to say it's mashed them and there has been a LOT of telly this week. DH often works until 9pm so it's a long bloody day.

Spring welcome! I'm not a fan of private midwives either; I think the main bonus is that you get the same person throughout your pregnancy and also to deliver your baby, but I know someone who had a HB with an independent midwife and it didn't sound like they were amazingly attentive, leading to something going slightly wrong at the end. Everyone was ok but I just thought for £3K it wasn't really worth it! And also pretty sure they can't practise from later in the year as the insurance issue if you're transferred into an NHS hospital from private healthcare is a total minefield.

Rockchick1984 · 16/08/2013 18:18

Pram that sounds like a nightmare! Do you think its linked to all the stress of the IVF (not saying that's any sort of an excuse, but I know my DH freaked a bit when I was expecting DS, it took a lot of hard work but we came out stronger after it all) or is he just behaving like a nob? That link I sent you on FB means you can have a play with different financial scenarios, just to give you something to do if you want to focus on practical options.

apprenticemamma · 16/08/2013 18:24

I think having a baby no matter how planned can put your relationship into a total tailspin. We planned and were happy fora second but dh and I have been freaking out and getting on worse than ever in 8years bc of all the stress. I've even found myself late at night doing some emergency single mum financial projections. Nuts. Things are improving with counselling and a little space apart has helped. Take care pram x

IceNoSlice · 16/08/2013 18:36

Alcohol free Wine and Flowers for those with relationship stresses. Vent away, if you need to. After all we don't actually know your OHs so won't ever lay into them in a misguided protective mate type way.

In other news... Can't stop trumping today (TMI!). Obv I will be blaming PG, but can that really be the cause? I've heard of preg- related heartburn but not, ahem, wind.

PramQueen1971 · 16/08/2013 18:37

I've unearthed a deception that has been going on forever, basically. The IVF did not drive him to it. What drove him to it was being a selfish and cavalier twat. I'm going to rip his throat out and consider whether I have any a) forgiveness in me and b) respect left. The one thing that brings me comfort is knowing that this is categorically not something that will break me as a human being. I have been broken in the past and nothing will ever have power over me like that did. I wish I could stop being surprised and hurt by others' weakness of spirit. When will I learn that humans are fallible and even those who worship us and would never wish us harm are capable of deception and weakness?

Dabarai · 16/08/2013 18:41

Goodness me, loads of stuff going on here at the moment!
Lamb - I totally panicked when my symptoms went suddenly away around 7 weeks, booked an early scan. they came back with the vengeance. This is my first one, so I have no idea what is really going on. I am with you! Now starting week 12, scan on Tuesday trying to will the days to hurry up.
Mummy - can't really help much, as no experience with bored kids, but I have heard that occasional TV does wonders?
Pram ? hope things will improve. Betrayal is a huge issue and it doesn?t matter if it?s physical or not, hurts the same, as I have learned from my own experience. For all it helps, I am here to offer a sympathetic ear. Hugs and virtual vodka also available.
Liberuna ? I went to my hospital to the Early Pregnancy Unit and they do free scans. Maybe you could do something similar?
Hi Spring!
To everyone else feeling rubbish ? sending positive online vibrations your way.

Wuxiapian · 16/08/2013 18:41

Sorry to hear some of you are having a rough ride.

Glad you're feel a bit better, Mummy. I can (kinda) relate re kid stresses. I have a 6 month old - demanding as it is - and a 15 year old with Aspergers who is like 5 kids (and needs constant entertaining). Towards the end of the day and ontop of the awful morning sickness, I'm a wreck - physically and mentally.

PramQueen1971 · 16/08/2013 18:48

Apprentice, I'm sorry you, too, have been laid low, but counselling is such a healthy way to move forward. Best of luck.

Ice, I am more than a little disappointed you will not be laying into my other half in a misguided-protective-mate-type way. Won't you reconsider?

Dabarai, thanks for the voddy but I'm teetotal. I'll raise you a Brew though.

FrankelInFoal · 16/08/2013 18:52

Pram I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this, crappy at the best of times but when pregnant - sheesh. You come across as a very strong woman, hang on in there.

My symptoms also seem to come and go. I feel at my best when I first wake up but within half an hour the background nausea kicks in. The only thing that is consistent is the extreme tiredness! I haven't slept so well in years!

Welcome to all the newbies (crap at keeping track of names!)

Dabarai · 16/08/2013 18:57

Ah Pram, we have a whole cupboard of different teas, you choose! :) I can also sneak on Th'usband and kick him in a balls.

IceNoSlice · 16/08/2013 19:35

Ok, you asked for it...

Oi! MrPram! What on earth are you playing at you loser? Don't you realise you are lucky to have such a wonderful lass as Prambo and you ought to be pampering her and respecting her, not playing silly buggers! Ooooh I could slap you!

So there. Don't mess. Ner.

Coolhand · 16/08/2013 19:41

That's crap Pram and a lot to deal with when ordinary life is tricky at the best of times in early pregnancy. So glad you have your mum's as a refuge. Issues of trust and betrayal really go deep. Thinking of you.

Ice how have you got this far without problems with wind! It's a nightmare in pregnancy. To all the SAHMs believe me when I say I think you have the hardest job out there - was glad to return to work after mat leave last time just to get my head showered for a bit!

Edamame · 16/08/2013 19:46

liberuna have you considered hiring a doula instead of a private midwife? A doula doesn't give medical advice but would get to know you before the birth, could be your birth partner if you wish and some provide support afterwards as well. A good friend recently hired one as a first time (single) mum and swears it was the best thing ever, described her as a sort of fantasy older, wiser sister, if that doesn't sound too hippyish. If it's the continuity you want, that might be the way to go - much cheaper than a private midwife too...

PramQueen1971 · 16/08/2013 20:09

Ice, thank you for making me smile x

..and thank you, too, Coolhand and Frank.

littleABI · 16/08/2013 20:09

Oh pram I hope you have all the support you need, and lots here from the Martians too!! Feel emotional for you :-( and just been a bit teary for a few days anyway.
This thread moves like lightening, but its so good to chat and read advice.

Back to symptoms:
One thing I've noticed is burping a lot more, never mind wind from other body bits! and noonday that hurt on and off, nausea that has waves... and lots of sneezing (no idea why)!

lyra so glad to hear about the scan :-)

Slippersandacuppa · 16/08/2013 20:10

Pram That's crap - as if you need that now. You sound like a tough ol' bird but we're here when you need us. Hope you get things sorted out at your mum's - s'just rubbish when you want things sorted in your head and the only person who can help is the bloody problem.

Liberuna I had two independent midwives for my last one's birth. They were AMAZING (sorry, bit shouty, I know). We paid less than £5k (although they would have been worth that) - I know it depends where you are. They became my friends and signed me off about a month late because we all enjoyed the cups and chats so much! All pre- and post-natal appointments at home, really good advice and continuity of care. They got to know me so well that they ignored me when I told them I was in labour but not to come. They came anyway - good job as one only just made it and the other one arrived as we were having a post birth slice of toast and a chat about names. There was a big problem with insurance so they stopped practising but the independent midwives website has a new announcement on its website advising midwives to carry on practising for babies due after October this year as the government really wants to support them and our right to choose. I'm going to get in touch with mine and find out what their situation is. I'd have no hesitation in recommending them. We had a payment plan and when I checked with DH, he said he was happy paying that as it's one of the most important things ever.

Lambchops You sound like me with DH in real life. Exact sentence uttered today by me, "Why don't you ever listen to me??!!"

littleABI · 16/08/2013 20:11

Sorry, auto correct wants noonday rather than plain old boobs!!

Slippersandacuppa · 16/08/2013 20:12

Good grief, can't keep up - congrats all with lovely scan results!

Edamame · 16/08/2013 20:13

Oh shit Prambo, that sounds serious.

commsgirl · 16/08/2013 21:18

prammy sounds horrid. Thinking of you Flowers

Massive respect to all you SAHMs - I'm struggling to deal with DP and the dog, can't imagine kids as well!

Everyone be kind to themselves x