September mums-to-be - the bumps get bigger and we all get more excited!

[HettySunshine]

Here we are ladies. A shiny new thread for us all. Let the chatting continue!

I also suffered from stress in a previous job and it led to depression. Fortunately I've changed companies now, and although my job is much more high pressure I have an amazing support network & it really has made the difference...I just don't suffer from the same physical symptoms and i think its because I have a boss I can ring & vent to any time like (who backs me 100%).

Have u got people who u can share the load with?

Thanks everyone, especially needed to hear a couple of days of stress isn't going to hurt the baby. The issue is that I've been working on a huge change project - mass redundancies etc which has been a massive challenge but really good experience and most of the time I (I know this sounds odd) but enjoy my job and thrive on the pressure.

Since Fri when the pressure's stepped up another gear. I've been feeling (on and off) strangely tearful, which is completely out of character. I've never ever cried because of work before, but I've had a couple of meltdowns (at home)... My manager called me yesterday and kept telling me to take time back (but soo hard when you're being inundated) but think they're recognising that its too much and they need to support me more.

Also not slept well at all for a couple of nights, want to nip this in the bud and stop it before it develops into something more serious or damages the baby. Going to mention it this morning, but feel like an idiot to let all this get on top of me, which I know is daft! Need to put myself first for once!!

Thanks Jo I'm going to see if my work medical insurance will cover any physio and if not I'll book it anyway - having googled, it looks like there are a couple of really good physios in my local area that specialize in pregnancy. I'll also mention it to the midwife when I next see her - which isn't for another 2 week's as she is fully booked.

Fozzie I can definitely sympathise - I have a really stressful job but have had to consciously step back - which is really hard for me as I have been known to live to work in the past and I do love my job. I was even asked last week by my boss when the last time was I could fly as he wanted me to go over to the US - if only he had asked me at 16 weeks when I had loads of energy - there's absolutely no chance now! I eoukd definitely say something at work as everyone will understand - it sounds like they are already concerned if they are telling you to take time back. Though I have to agree that I don't think I could top herewego s day for stress - you must have been mentally as Dallas physically exhausted here!

well as and not Dallas! ruddy predictive text

Re: Stress

I suffered from stress related depression a few years ago and what really helped me was getting a dog. When you have a dog you have to leave work at a sensible time; you have something infinitely more interesting to talk/think about; you have get out and do things. I sort of wonder if having a baby might have a similar effect.

I've been a hundred times more productive at work since becoming pregnant partly, I think, because I know I have to go home and do a bunch of sleeping and I haven't got time to waste . Women I know at work who have babies all seem to be much better at drawing a line at doing stupid, meaningless tasks and getting on with much more useful things.

We're all really guilty of thinking that work is the be all and end all but actually we're all a lot less essential than we think and the work will continue to be done without us.

That said I am freaking out slightly at the prospect of being at home with a just a baby for months on end. Will my brain turn to mush? Will I forget how to speak to grown ups?

kips hope everything is ok

re stress, I probably have a very unstressful job in the grand scheme of things, but recently I've been totally unable to cope with what should be straight forward things, i seem to have to much in my head to be able to concentrate on anything, which has been really getting me down and led to a couple of tearful meltdowns. i had a good chat with my manager though and have rearranged my work and leave so now I only have three full weeks of work left - yippeee!!! i then have to spend 5 weeks full time on my phd then think about the baby/labour stuff, but i am hoping that just dealing with one thing at a time will help.

work related stress shouldn't harm the baby, i think long term serious stress like war, tsunami/hurricane-esque devastation and major earthquakes are the levels of stress that impact unborn babies. having said that, any level of stress during pregnancy is rubbish when you're hormonally less able to cope with it, so do talk to someone about reducing or rearranging work loads if you can. most people are sympathetic, or at least don't want a pregnanty lady crying in the office!

on that note, i probably shouldn't be here and should do some work ...

Oh no kips feel your pain. I had a DVT, well a pulmonary embolism, years ago following an injury. Was bad enough when not pregnant, I hope those Teg stockings have improved, they were sooooo hot. Get better soon, once you're on the blood thinners they seem to be less concerned from memory.
On a very minor note, in comparison, I am having a very disappointing morning, been so unecessarily excited about the cheese scone I got
Last nightin morrisons. Imagine my horror, just bitten into one, obviously been a mix up in bakery, as it is a cherry scone with cheese on....bleurgh

Kips I hope you are ok! It's just really good that they are incredibly on the ball with things like that these days- lucky to have it diagnosed early on!

frog that woman is a total dick. Feeling sorry for the fact that she is obviously just jealous of your bump however is just not gonna cut the mustard! You should say something to her! She's no right to make herself feel better at your expense.

Eating- well, eating... Literally can't stop. DH was browsing my preggo app the other day and burst out laughing when he read that as baby gets bigger, space inside diminishes and I evidently should only be managing much smaller meals. Apparently this does in no way apply to me!

It was my birthday yesterday, so went for a preggo massage at the spa in the afternoon- it was heaven. So so good but ended far too quickly! I wasn't so sure about the rubbing of the bump, but everything else was amazing. Also I are cake for all three meals yesterday, which was grand.

Poor you kips. Do they think you'll need to stay in for long?

Oooh Jammy, very jealous of your preggo massage. We're still without a bath (and many other essential bits of the house), so this is beyond my wildest dreams.

Kips thinking of you!
Jammy glad to know I'm not the only one who can't stop eating. I bought some food on the way to work and realised a)my arm was sore from carrying it and b)I was going to put that entire weight of food inside me (including 5 nectarines). Oops. Ps, was at an all day meeting tues and people actually saw me eat three desserts. They were tiny (lemon mousse in an expresso cup) but still... the shame! Happy birthday too- hope you enjoyed the massage!

I keep forgetting what I'm going to say. Luckily work not as stressful as herewego (what do you do?) but been very busy. Been on trains all over the SE the last two weeks (baby loves trains and dances in my insides happily for the journey length! (not so fun if it's 2 1/2 hours)). Had lots of friendly conversations with people over the bump though :) But it's been mad here and I'm shattered. Thankfully today is my friday and I'm off to visit family for a christening this weekend. Just hope the in-laws are bareable.

Was going to say- at Yoga this week we were asked at the start what we wanted from our birth experience. I said"to be myself, to stay as rational as possible, to not become a cliche and to know that my birth plan is "birth preferences" and that I will go with whatever is necessary to get my baby out safely. Yoga teacher gave me a bit of a weird look- is that a weird request?"
I could say "soft music, warm water, massage, visualisation and breathing, minimal pain (and therefore minimal pain relief), active labour, baby popping out in an hour flat" but that's a bit unrealistic! (isn't it?)

It's good to have ideals but I'm a pragmatist! I've always been!

Jammy...she's too old for babies now, she's late 50's.... She just doesn't like me. Fat cow.
I'd love a preggo massage..sounds lovely.

fl0b0t I think your birth plan sounds good!

Eeeknumber3 An abomination! How disappointing.

jammy Happy birthday! Much more envious of the cake than the massage. As it was your birthday yesterday I feel I will celebrate it with some cake of my own.

kips I hope your doing ok.

I wanted to ask a question, I was reading another section on mm ans they were discussing the most embarrassing things your parents did when you were a kid. Loads of people said 'being older than everyone else's parents'. It made me think what would be considered old at the school gates? I'm 30 but my dh is 8 years older than me. What's your opinion?

kips.

EmmaDee I'm really surprised to read that. I don't remember being particularly embarrassed by my parents and they were a little older than most of my peers' parents (Ma was 34 when she had me). Teenagers in my experience (I'm a high school teacher) seem to be more embarrassed by their parents thinking they're being "cool" and trying to be their "mate".

Emma dee, I don't consider 30 to be an old parent. I've taught kids whose parents were in their mid forties when they had them- that's an older parent, in my eyes. An adopted child's parents are well into their 50s.

My parents were 34/33 when they had me and at the time were the older parents but don't expect it's the case now.

Well work was much better today. Told my manager, and second line mgr I hit a wall yesterday and needed to step back but they'd already realised and everyone has been really supportive and I have another couple of people to help me. So feeling much happier! Also baby's been booting me all day

Mw apt tomorrow again - seem to have loads

Read back my message about my weird day at work and realise it sounded a bit like 'nobody could be as stressed as me' message. I didn't mean it like that, it was a very unusual day that made me feel quite surreal. I'm a manager / teacher in an adult education college.
Fozzie - I'm so glad you have nipped it in the bud, starting to lose sleep over work is horrid.
Joskar and others' messages about stress were fabulous. XXXX

The teary, 'I've hit a wall' stress is definitely linked to your lack of sleep as well, Fozzie - last night I waited up for DH to get in from a works do (which was a mistake as he thought midnight was a suitable time to get in from Wednesday night drinks), went to sleep at 12.30 then DD (who is a sleep angel, usually) randomly woke up 4 times between 1.30am and 4.30am... I then had to get up at 6.30am after a total of 3 hours sleep, and spent the day alternating between being a zombie and tearing up at random thoughts, such as I haven't been to the cinema in over a year!!!! Bonkers, but totally normal for a sleep deprived, hormonal pregnatron.
Glad you're feeling better today and have such a supportive team.

herewego2 it didn't come across like that at all - I did wonder what your job was though - I think to work in any kind of education must be stressful.

I had a meeting today and one of the managers said to me 'how many weeks you' so I said 28 weeks and she went 'oh my God you're massive! you could easily be 35 weeks - just think how big you're going to be then!' he cowbut of course I just laughed it off.

the cow

So true! Every time someone asked me if I was ok and showed concern I welled up...was soo pleased to be working from home so no-one could see! Feeling far better now and hoping for better nights sleep- your msgs were great so nice to hear Im not the only slightly bonkers one

What an awful person Charl1

She was prob massive without carrying another person! Meow...

People are unbelievably rude!

Weirdly though someone said to me the other day how lovely I looked, they were prob lying through their teeth but I happily took the compliment, far better than the usual -look at your massive stomach comments

Charl1 - how dreadful!! I have a theory that certain people really enjoy watching pregnant people put on weight, forgetting there is actually a baby in there and it is not just lager and pies. It makes them feel smug about themselves. The medical people are the only ones who can decide if our tummies are too big!! I bet you look lovely...
Anyone else feeling horrible but looking at the bump pics on facebook and thinking 'wow they look really attractive / suiting them / carrying well / nice frock' etc?

crap, just realised ive not done any bloody Pelvic Floor execises in weeks/months. Please tell me im not the only one....