October 2013: Almost halfway!

[cherrycherry41]

Thread 8 of 1,000

No, it's a mixed group, one woman was 40weeks

I'll give it a go for 6 weeks, and then see if I want to do another run of 6.

I'm currently the main earner, too. But we're keeping our options open as to what we'll do next year.

Oh sorry falcon
mrso I've got to wait until 4th June for my scan - feels ages away. We did nct last time but not nhs so can't compare for you. I thought the nct were good, we had a good teacher who wasn't too preachy about breastfeeding or anti pain relief which some are and I liked the small class size. Still see my other nct mums now.

Our NHS classes with dc1 were an eye opener and an education. Midwifed and physios were super but the people attending were, erm... unique in there own way. We had a mum and daughter being each other birth partners, both younger than me and DH and we were under 30. Anyway daughter was on dc1 and mum was on dc2 and were due on same day. Had seemingly been to a party together. We also had 3 14yr olds due on same week who went to school together and 3 mums who didn't know who the dads were so were on their own.

Hope not upset anybody by describing our class mates as unique, was just a bit of a shock to me that only me and DH were together in any way

Lots of lovely scan news today. Hope the cheeky monkeys who were lying in the wrong position turn round for the next scan!

I have another work tale of woe/discrimination. When I announced my pregnancy my CEO called me in and after the congrats etc, said it was really bad timing as he was going to make me head of dept but as I was pregnant he wasn't going to do that now and was. Going to give the position to someone else instead. I was slightly gob smacked and didn't say much at the time but then got really mad afterwards and went back to see him again. Asked him what he would have done if I had announced my pregnancy after he had made me HOD. Would he have demoted me and put the other person in my place? He said 'oh no, I wouldn't have done that' so I said 'well how is this any different then?' He then said he would have to think some more.
At the moment it looks like I will get the position but until it is announced I won't be celebrating! And if I don't get given it I won't be going back. And will be citing illegal discrimination against pregnant women as the reason.

Re: NCT we did the course and it did give me confidence to ask questions during the birth. I still meet up with the ladies and toddlers every Friday and my DS is 2-8. I also went to a free 'first time parents' course at my sure start centre and met some lovely ladies there too.

18+4 so scan not for a couple of weeks.

wow - so many of us in similar situations workwise... I'm so happy I posted my grief earlier today. Was worried it was a bit too heavy but I'm really glad I did. It helped me so much to chat with all of you today - so easy to take things personally and lose perspective... hope it helped others too - to know how many women go through the same stresses and motions!

mrso yes, lets get out of what we do while we can :) far too much form over substance... one of my friends retrained to be a personal trainer and one became a gardener - can't go more extreme!

I did NCT classes when I was pregnant with DS and loved them. Met some great local ladies and am still in touch with some of them. The group was small, somehow we were all similar ages and had similar ideas about babies. Yes, they brainwash you a bit into no pain relief and breastfeeding but my lady did it in a really nice and sensible way. I would really recommend them. Didn't do NHS classes so can't compare I'm afraid...

shooting you are my scan buddy - I'm also on 4th June! Feels so far away... can't wait.

well done on your first pregnancy yoga shire :-)

Big congrats soup, mon and jelly on your results. What a relief.
We had our 20 week scan yesterday and all was well. Didn't find out the sex but went in thinking it was a girl and came out thinking boy!
With dd, I left 3 weeks before due date and she arrived a week late so I had a whole month off. Planning to do the same this time.
Can't remember who mentioned Nct classes. Personally I would recommend them but mainly for the friends I made. We still meet every week
Just in case anyone missed it or for newbies too - there is a 'secret' Facebook group which has been set up for people to share pics etc.
happy to add people if I can - pm me if you're interested.

Sanji - that behaviour from your boss is terrible, not to mention discrimination. I'm aghast they even said that to you.

Congrats char1eston! Although slightly gutted we don't know what you have :-)

sanji just read your post... shocking and I have all my fingers crossed for you. Really hope you get it! Sadly... I believe they can say something like this... exactly 4 weeks after giving birth to DS my director called me to let me know that they were going to appoint someone else above me, someone I would be reporting to, who would effectively end up doing my job (ie. demote me without using this word). He ended the phone call saying "you still have a job here and we hope you come back". It felt like he was really saying "we have to have a job for you here but we hope you choose not to come back". I emailed them asking for reasons, my new job description etc. but they would just ignore my emails and always call me back - so there was nothing from them in writing, at any point. They obviously knew what they were doing was illegal. It was 4 weeks after birth and all I could do then was cry and get depressed for 3 months. I also had to go back after 7 months as was then the main breadwinner. I won the battle only by getting a completely different role in exchange which was OK longterm but I felt cheated. And I supposedly work for "one of the best employers in the UK"...

Congrats to today's scanners.

My back has been sore so I've decided to try some if this exercise I keep hearing good about. I found some Pilates videos on YouTube and I've ordered a mat. Pilates had been good for me in the past so I'm hoping for good things!

I accidentally tapped post before I was ready. I wanted to say that I really feel for you ladies having a hard time at work. In this day and age you would think things were better, and I really do hope you fight this, sanji.

Congrats to today's scanners hopefully the two ladies who have to go back for final checks can enjoy getting an extra peak their little darlings when they get the all clear

Sorry to hear some of you are having a hard time! It's so horrible that I have to decide between family and work and that ppl without families get chosen over u - even though they may not technically be best for the job!

Anterior placenta over here at 18+3 I've felt movements about 5 times id say if that, certainly nothing to write home about!

Midwife tommorow I didn't get a 16 week appt as I saw her at 6 and 13+5 so was pointless seeing her at 16 weeks so hoping to hear the heart beat and show off my 3d scans to her I have the same midwife as last time and she visits me at home for every appt (except consultant and scan appts) then she is there for u for the duration of labour providing there are no complications that require extra intervention

Wrt ante natal classes I didn't attend them with dd and don't have any attention of doing so this time round eithe

Think I've covered everything lol sorry if I've missed something out its hard to look back and type on my phone at the same Time!!

Just wondered what everyone's tiredness levels are like? My tiredness has gone back to being the same as it was at like 7-8 weeks pregnant if not worse

P.s thanks to those who advised me on my new glasses the other day I now feel I can wear them without walking into door frames Etc xx lol

Ugh I wish I could edit posts I meant to put

It's so horrible that u have to decide between family and work

I am absolutely worn out Natalie! Not helped by the competitive tiredness of my childless, non pregnant colleague today, who I nearly kicked up the arse :o

Sanjifair - that's awful, but your boss is an arse. What a thing to say to you - his HR dept will be furious with him as it's a clear path to a tribunal. Good luck x

Haven't caught up on today's news.

But I keep thinking this but forget to put it in a post.

Random tip. In hospital the bounty lady takes photographs of your LO. Love them or loath them its worth knowing they are expensive. Starting from £50 from what I remember (ha only 7 months n I can't remember). I love my pics. And life was so hecktik that we didn't get any other professional pictures taken. N fact he is almost exactly 24hours old in the pic makes them brilliant.
But it is worth keeping in mind the cost as I didn't expect it!

Right lets catch up on today's chat.

Just checking in after a stupidly busy day. I have read all of the posts - but sorry if I miss anything;

Congrats to all those who had scans today! Pleased to hear about healthy scans. To those who didn't get to check everything; like Natalieand said, it will be another chance to see your baby on the screen, and hopefully you'll then get the all clear.

Sanji I cannot believe that your manager said that! Based on what claphammama said about not having anything in writing, I would be tempted to take a hidden recorder (or your mobile, but recording) into his office next time you go to see him, otherwise I assume you'll have no evidence of it.

natalieand at just over 20 weeks I have spent the last few days coming home from work and having a nap. I thought I was over that (haven't had to have naps for a good few weeks now) so it's quite frustrating that the tiredness has come back! I still consider myself fortunate to not have had MS/be having it now like someone said they were (sorry, I have forgotten who!) ... I find it best if I set an alarm for 40 minutes, otherwise I will sleep for hours, wake up starving at 9.30ish, eat, and then not be able to get back to sleep because I am too full/bloated and haven't long got up!

Back to being constantly exhausted here too Natalie I just can't stay awake and end up eating a lot of rubbish for a quick energy boost to get me through then ofcourse come crashing straight back down again a while later.
I'm desperate to get to bed but got to wait for the washing machine to finish its cycle or I'll have nothing to wear tomorrow. Dp said he'll wait up but he's a bit tipsy so he'd probably fall asleep leaving it all in the machine.

I am exhausted too, Natalie, at 17 weeks. I haven't gotten any more energetic with time.

Restless legs tonight again, how the hell can I get them to calm down so I can sleep? Supposed to be up at 4.30 for work but its 11pm and I can't get my legs and feet to stop wanting to move. Is this a crazy pregnancy symptom that I have avoided till now of am I losing the plot completely

I get that too jelly It always starts just as I'm drifting off.

Shocked at the work stories! It is so tough. Particularly in some jobs. I'm sure my work are not happy at my situation. But it's tough for them. As I've progressed as far as I can, no further up for me anyway. N I went through my pay scale review before having ds1.

DH actually mentioned DC3 today. As in "how about we start trying for dc3 in January" so there is an even gap between all of them was my reply. "When we have a full time nanny AND cleaner, then I will discuss it" that will never happen! Lol

Quick tip on restless legs - apparently it is caused by a lack of potassium (I get them too & it drives me insane). A quick way to boost your potassium levels so you can get to sleep is to eat a banana. I think it would be worth mentioning to midwife to see if she can suggest a supplement,can't imagine having to deal with another 22 weeks of stupid twitching legs. And there are only so many bananas a person can eat.

Oh n I'm sure I read that restless leg is an actual thing. N can occur in pregnancy.

I keep clenching my jaw. N it makes my jaw, cheeks, teeth and tongue hurt. Sucks.

Opps tucking. Didn't read before posting.

Hi all, thanks for your comments. It was completely outrageous of him, but behind closed doors and verbally so nothing I could do legally even if I wanted. It's now been implied to me by both him and HR that I will get the position, but no announcement yet. Unfortunately the timing may not work in my favour as I have a new boss who starts in August. They make wait and let him decide who gets the position, and I'll be leaving mid September, so not exactly long to make an impression...wouldn't surprise me at all if what happened would be essentially what clapham described, and they make an announcement that the other person got the job after I leave.

It was a massive shock to me, they were fine about my previous pregnancy. Has definitely changed how I feel about re company/CEO.