November 2013 - Thread 3 - The Loo Huggers and Crisp Lickers!

[MummaPanda]

Thread 3 already? We talk too much!!

vix that's really positive. Take care if yourself and rest if you can.

onelittletoddlerterror I think the tone of voice and facial expression made it clear in this case that there was judginess going on sadly, including the shaking of head and muttering as she left me (no idea who said woman was btw, just a random stranger )...This was when I was pregnant with dc4 btw.
vix Mw comments re: scan do sound encouraging. She must see it a lot and your hormone levels are obviously increasing.

vix thats brilliant , keep thise feet up .
with dc4 it was more the 'again' comments that got to me . I think that once you get past 3 dc people do look shocked at any more , my mil is the worst never spoke to us for 4 weeks when we announced dc4 ! Tried to give her a warning of ttc this time and reminded her of her reaction last time , still can't bring myself to tell her though

I have three siblings, and the people down the road wouldn't let their kids play with us as they thought we must be some weird religion. I guess judgey people exist in all generations.

Hey RJM welcome & congrats!! Its sounds like things are progressing and everything is where and as it should be so far so I hope you can focus on that and relax

Vix that's great news, I hope that was a big weight off for you.

DP has started with the bump photo's, hence my 2 week weigh gain shock before (not that dramatic but I didn't expect any difference). We're using belly booth. I imagine it will become a source of arguments as I get him to retake the photo 10 times a go lol.

Was determined to have a productive day but that is falling by the wayside. Tidied up some clothes and now I want to lie down, who am I?!

Great that you had an encouraging appointment vix

I am starting to feel a bit more nauseous now. Debating whether to give work the heads up so they can plan in case I am off, but I am an intensely private person and would find it hard if they knew and then something went wrong. Hmmmm

She didn't look at hormone levels or anything. Just said that bleeding is really common, and that as long as it isn't heavy and there's no pain then the likelihood is that I will be fine.

Still bleeding a bit this pm, still very worried but I do have hope.

I recommend telling work tired but only who needs to know. I felt the same but had to tell my boss in the end and it was a good move. He is the only person who knows for now.

Think I might check with dh and then tell tomorrow. I have a heavy workload and don't want them to be taken unawares if I end up needing time off for hyperemesis again.

If I tell my boss I'm pregnant how confidential does he have to keep my news? Does he have a responsibility to tell HR and Area managers?

HR don't need to know until 15 weeks before so its unlikely he has an obligation there, though it could always be worth checking. If you request a private meeting to discuss a personal matter then whatever the subject it should remain just that - private. Maybe call Acas for advice first if you're concerned (08457 47 47 47)

That's it tired I have a good relationship with work and wanted to keep it that way by being honest, but I wasn't well so it would have been a case of lying rather than not telling for me.

My graze box has arrived and I've already eaten 2/4 of the little packs inside. The lemon and poppy slice is so yummy, and so is the herby bread basket. I'm drinking them down with a can of coke. I've found coke is my new craving, along with icecream. I'm sure I can't be the only one craving junk here.

I think it really depends on what your relationship with work and your boss is, and also on the nature of your work, whether you go and tell them sooner or later.
As far as I know, this sort of information should be treated very confidentially, but what extent, I'm not sure... I'd have thought that HR would have to treat it confidentially.

However, I once worked at a company where, if you told the HR manager about being pg, the whole senior management team would find out, she was a terrible blabbermouth.
When I fell pg last year, I didn't tell anyone at work here, apart from our Health & Safety person (I work in a lab with lots of chemicals) and one colleague, who was covering for me, doing the things I wasn't comfortable with. When I then had the mc, I still didn't tell anyone, to this day my boss doesn't know why I was off for over 4 weeks at the beginning of the year.

This time, I'm not planning on telling anyone until I have all the results from the 12-week scan, bloods, nuchal measurements etc.
But I am very lucky that I work at university, where no one really pays any attention to when you come in or leave, or what you do during the day, so I'm not too worried about people noticing, everyone is so wrapped up in their own project.
However, if I do get that new job, it might be a whole different matter...

Vix - really pleased that things are looking better now.

i had a small amount of brown discharge at lunch time (tmi? Soz!) and am very paranoid but I am going to take your midwives advice and not panic just yet! Does going to the loo every 30 mins to check count as panic? Doesn't help that I am still waiting for an appointment at the high risk pregnancy clinic so don't know when am going to have my first scan (for a control freak like me this is a major issue. I like to have a plan god dammit!).

JBrd if you are going to a new job, have you thought about the maternity leave implication? Because as far as I can remember, you have to have worked 26 weeks up to the 15th week before birth. That would mean 41 weeks before birth isnt' it?

But I'm with you JBrd on the nuchal test, blood test etc. Are you a bit more worried because of age? (I'm not sure what age you are but you were supposedly on the oldie board)? I'm 38 and Dr Google told me the risk is 1 in 189 (or 1 in 146 if it's age at birth). It's definitely not very reassuring

Alwaystheaunty I have friction marks on my hips from all the checking I've done over the weekend

One Oh, yes, I have - I would most likely not qualify for mat pay, only maternity allowance. Which is not great (certainly not compared with the package I would get in my current job!), and I will not be able to take as much time off as I had with DS, as well as use some of my savings...
In the worst case, I might have to reduce DS's time at childcare, although I hope it won't have to come to that because he's really well settled now - all in all, not the optimal situation.

But at the moment, everything is still so much in the air! For my own personal happiness (and sanity), I do need to change - life is too short, and I cannot put my life on hold 'just' because I'm pg, who knows what will happen... I was resigned to stay when I fel pg last year, but then had a mc - which made me realise even more how much I really need to find something else. I didn't think I'd fall pg again so quickly, so I went ahead with the job applications. Right now, I'm thinking, one step at a time...

One cross post! Yes, I'm one of the oldies, I'm 41! The stats are not in our favour, aren't they... They frightened me when I had DS at 38/39, and they are even worse now!

Vix That is good news! Try and take it easy, put your feet up and have a

I am saving worrying about whether there is something wrong with the bean until I know that there is a bean there! Am 37 so I guess I also fall into the older category. And to put the stats into perspective a 1/146 chance is 0.68% and 1/189 is 0.529%. I think. Considering I work in finance my maths is rubbish!!!

AlwaystheAuntie - I would give your GP a call. After my spotting last night, I've only been allowing myself toilet checks every hour (and so far so good fx).

The doc finally called me back though and they want me to have a blood test (although I think that's because I had a MC previously - albeit 10 years ago). They've left a form in reception, although I didn't really ask the right questions - will the blood test be at the docs surgery or at the hospital?! My booking in didn't have any blood tests, they're going to be at my 12 week scan at the hospital!

I genuinely thought this pregnancy stuff would be a doddle, how wrong was I!?

No idea on when to tell work, but if I start needing more time off it will be sooner rather than later.

I had full blood count taken as part of my booking in appt this morning.

berrybomb I can't have my bloods taken at the GP because they don't have that service! The only place I could get it done is the hospital. So I was ordered to go and have my bloods taken before 11 weeks, ie before my 12 week scan. I'm going to tomorrow at lunch tomorrow. I think it all depends on the services available in your area.

I went to my booking in as a late lunch too. I will be taking annual leave for the scan. I think if you are tight with annual leave, or that it is hard to sneak off during lunch, you will have to tell your line manager early.