July 2013 - Thread 6: cankles, bumps, strangely placed lumps, the glamours of pregnancy go on and on

[dinkystinky]

New thread to natter away on.

Link to waddlers and riders and stats list here

Well, that was an interesting day I don't wish to repeat. DH and I were going to Asda (a five minute drive) to get some tobacco (for him, not me). Driving down our road (main road) when some lunatic taxi driver in a minibus pulled out of a side road at speed, heading straight for our car (which was on the crossroads). He was literally heading straight for the passenger side (with me in it) til DH accelerated and swerved (because he wasn't stopping). He hit the back third of our car and made us spin.

He stopped, came over, and then offered to pay us for the damage and not go through the insurance....very dodgy. tried to suggest not much wrong with our car til I got out and said it may well be damaged underneath and that at 5 1/2 months pregnant I didn't need this shit.... He gave DH his details (but not insurance details), and ran off quickly (he had passengers in his taxi...)

Tried to ring the Police (who didn't answer) so we had to go to the Police station to report it. Annoyed because they could have told whether he was drunk or not, etc. When we went to the station, they weren't bothered.

DH was worried sick about effect on me and bump.....

Went to the hospital, first had to get bump checked out at the Maternity Unit (all was OK), and then spent 3 more hours in A & E getting the whiplash sorted. By sorted, I mean no-one even looked at it, they gave me a leaflet about neck exercises....even though I already have neck problems.

What a great day....

BadMissM what a lucky escape! I hope you're not feeling too stiff & shaken up this morning.

BadMissM hope you are ok this morning!

Dinky your comments about enjoying your DCs concerts made me smile. It is so nice when parents say they have enjoyed concerts- I don't expect it but it is always uplifting I was almost teary at the end of my kiddies concert- It is so funny to think that I'll be watching little bean in a few years- I bet I'll be crying then!

Guava good to know there are others who are not having huge movement. Sorry you are uncomfortable at the moment. Your comment about the doctor made me laugh and think about when I tried to make light of a couple of situations. When I went to tell the Dr I was pregnant they asked about my general health and I said I didn't smoke but drank about a bottle a week was being slightly conservative , Dr asked if this was shared with DH and I said no we probably over the week drank about a bottle each. Then she looked concerns and asked 'a bottle of what?' I replied wine (I don't tend to drink bottles of spirits a week...) then she started to write things down and I realised she meant since I realised I was pregnant! So I laughed and said since finding out I was pregnant I hadn't been drinking... She didn't laugh but did cross out the notes she had been making. She still gave me a leaflet on drinking in pregnancy Then came the time the midwife was reporting back on my blood tests and said I didn't have HIV or what ever else they test you for and a smiled and went "phew! " in a jokey way... No smile then either... I must learn to be more serious.

Phie I felt so tired yesterday too and had to have a lie down while DH was working in the garden... Felt a bit guilty still drank tea and ate chocolate though

Might buy some curtains for bean's room today- eeeeeek!!

23+1

BadMissM glad you escaped that incident without too much harm, just hope you don't feel too shaken & worried today.

Oh heck BadMissM! What a day. Glad you're ok. The police are shit a lot of the time...I feel worried to have to rely on their support when EXH makes his 6 week appearance in June/July.

Still snowing here!!! Anyone else?

Well, not a lot going on here. All seems to have gone quiet with Ex (but I know that's just the quiet before the storm) so I'm on tenterhooks. The local Domestic Violence unit is coming out in a couple of weeks time to assess me and see how they can help with extra protection while he's in the country. I have to say it's so nice to hear from the professionals that i'm not imagining things and that I'm not being unreasonable - I'm so used to being told I am, on both counts.

Bump has been very quiet this morning so I got a bit scared (god, all the old anxiety and paranoia and restlessness is just rearing it's ugly head - I hope I don't start with the insomnia too) but she's in there - I used the Doppler.

DS is loving the snow - he built a snow bunny yesterday - I wish I could be out thre with him - used to love building snow-men with him when we were in the states.

We ordered a new bed for him last week - one of those ones with a desk, wardrobe and drawers - so at least we can get his bedroom sorted and then concentrate on ours in May/June ready for the nugget to arrive.

24+3

Oh Badmiss so awful! Hope you are feeling okay today sounds like an awful experience.

Hope you're ok now badmiss, what a horrible experience. Feet up and relax all day!

Oh BadMissM - hope you're ok today. What a rubbish thing to happen at any time let alone now.

DS1 was awake from 1-3am. I brought him into bed to settle him but he spent 2 hours pulling my hair. Starting to get worried about how I'll cope if he does this when new baby arrives & I'm up at odd hours feeding him. DS1 usually sleeps fine but once a fortnight or so he does just wake in the early hours and want to play. Anyone with 2/more kids already dealt with something similar? Any tips?

Hope you're all staying warm & toasty.

Afternoon all. Hope everyone is keeping warm and dry today.

BadmissM - what a day! I see your local hospital are continuing to provide sub-optimum care: hope your neck isn't too bad. We had a similar accident happen to us when I was pregnant with ds2 - it really shakes you doesn't it. Thank goodness your dh had his wits about him at the time of the accident.

Trust - so sorry you are going through all this stress. Great that the local DVU is proving supportive. Ah at ds's snow bunny - cold with snow flurries here but not right kind of snow to make stuff with.

Ouch Citizen - how old is ds1? dS1 was a great sleeper (apart from when he had nightmares) but Ds2 was a bugger till around 18 months and did the wake up for a few hours thing. We ended up just ignoring him (only going in if he was crying and just keeping it dark and quiet and saying it is night time and time to sleep) and it passed. Both he and ds1 had bunny clocks from 2 - bunny asleep means its night time, bunny awake means you can get up to play - seemed to help too. He has been a goospd sleeper since, though that said last night he woke us at 1 worried we'd lost his orange Mike the knight pants. God knows where that came from!!

badmissm hope you are feeling ok today, remember the aches and pains might get a little worse in the first few days so try to keep mobile. Sounds scary

phie we will have to start a discussion on all the best bits of labour to help you feel a bit better about it. There is no feeling in the world that compares with seeing and holding your baby for the first time. All the pain and discomfort disappears when you see the tiny squashed face and perfect little fingers and toes. Its all worth it really, this is my 4th time and there's others on this thread with even more than me.
Definitely get going with the relaxation, natal hypnotherapy etc fron about 30 weeks I think. Stay away from childbirth topics meantime!!

Another cold day here but we went out for a forest walk and it was beautiful with all the snow, boys loved it too. Dh is now making tea, a roast with all the trimmings!! Lucky me!

OK today, but a bit achey and shaken from yesterday's fun and games.... Thank heaven DH moved quickly, or it would have been so much worse....

trustissues75 Have been through all that fun with ex-H (not British either and violent). The DVU/PPU are usually the best out of all of them. had to fight my ex through courts here and in France for custody...it's hard work xxx

Thinking you've brought tears to my eyes in a nice way, ooo I cannot wait to see her little squishy face!! Yes will definitely take all of your advice & look into natal hypnotherapy.
Would love to hear some of your birth stories possibly if anyone is willing to share? As nice & traumatic as they are I need to get myself used to the idea of giving birth.

Hi everyone, glad you are ok badmiss sounds scary though.

We have no snow here just completely freezing!
I'm off work this week so planning on cleaning and clearing (and probably sleeping!) went shopping yesterday and ended up getting nursery furniture and pushchair...all seems very real now, can't wait to decorate the nursery and get it all set up. My mum did tell me I'm not allowed to have the pushchair indoors until bubba arrives, anyone else got family superstitions they have to follow?
24+3 (viability dance!)

Phie...my birth story

Started contracting during the worst snowstorm of 2004/2005 so went straight to hospital as we were worried about getting snowed in. Managed for 20ish hours with nothing but breathing through it (no G&A in the states) then had waters broken because was only at 3 cm (wasn't even actually in active labour) Contractions ramped up - had a shot of fentanyl....zoned out for a while...2 hours later no progress, decided on epidural...went from 3 - 10 in less than 15 minutes, could feel everything but the pain so pushing was a doddle and DS was out in 5 pushes (approx.). Not even a graze, just slightly sore once epi wore off. DS was 6lb 9oz. Went home 2 days later (was in amazing birth unit where they let you stay in your own private ensuite room) and no lasting problems. Not what I had planned (homebirth with no drugs) but it all went swimmingly anyway and was a very very very positive experience. Cant' wait to do it again!!!!!

Hi everyone

BadMiss sorry to hear about your accident yesterday - that is one of my worst fears whilst pg, and the fact is no matter how careful you are on the roads there are always other idiots out there who are anything but. Glad your baby is fine though and hope there's no lasting damage from the whiplash.

Well, little bump got to go on her first hen do last night (well I woosed out after the meal - although not drinking isn't generally bothering me I couldn't quite face clubbing sober!) It was fun to have a night out, but I did end up with serious bump envy when I discovered the other pg member of the party, sporting a neat yet impressive and very obvious bump was 5 whole weeks behind me, whilst I was subjected to yet more exclamations of "you're pregnant? Really? 23 weeks? I don't believe it!" . Sorry I must sound like a broken record with the small bump thing but it is a serious preoccupation at the moment. Thankfully I've had a fair bit of movement the past few days so I know there is life in there, even if it's a very tiny one!

Went for a stomp in the snow this morning, which was unbelievably tiring but good to get out for a proper walk. I pleaded pregnancy as a reason to stay out of the snowball fights but enjoyed watching DH and his mate pelt each other!

Hope people's journeys to work are not too disrupted by the weather tomorrow. The main roads seem OK round here so fingers crossed it won't be too bad. Strange considering this is going to be a summer baby that one of the abiding memories of the pregnancy is going to be snow, snow and yet more snow!

23 weeks today (just realised that all being well I'll be doing the viability jig on Easter Day - there's an excuse to eat chocolate if ever there was one!)

Thanks for the support ladies - and sorry BadMissM you've had to go through it too. I'm terrified he's going to go through with his threats and take me to court and is going to prove me unfit or the judge is going to frown upon me refusing direct unsupervised contact for the past 2 years without a court order and various other safeguards in place and just change my residence order over to him and DS will just disappear off into the USA sunset....

TrustIssues75 You will also need a really good international solicitor/barrister. Rules begin to get odd when overseas jurisdictions are involved. How old is DS? What is his opinion? They do take this into consideration.... PM me if you like, I'll tell you what I know also depends where you are as to how easy it is to find one... Take him to court first, then you kind of get the upper hand.... I literally came so close to losing DD....

Phie Is all worth it to see their little squishy faces! I had a hideous labour, 14 hours, at 31 weeks, with placental abruption and enormous blood loss...all worth it. Mind you, am now looking over at the stroppy teenager in question!

Beginning You sound very organised!

Ama It was damn scary....glad it's all over! Lucky you with the little bump, I look like I've swallowed a bus! I'm 23 weeks tomorrow, so viability jog on Easter Monday!

Beginning - I have to go for my Shaad in early May - basically when family and friends feed the mother to be till shes ready to burst and bless her and the baby. That and the rice ceremony when baby is 6 months or so - first taste of rice so v important to Indians - are the only traditions/rituals and superstitions I have decided to take on board. There are millions more - Hindus are super superstitious - but fortunately my parents are among the more sane members of my extended family and so don't drive me mad with them. Dh's mum told him the pram one - I think he laughed...

Wintry walks sound fun Thinking and Ama - has been less active in the dinky household!

Trust and BadmissM - so sorry you have been/are going through such awful custody issues. Sounds truly awful.

badmiss turns out I'm a bit OCD about baby stuff, usually very disorganised but can't wait to get everything sorted and organised! Seem to have lots of busy weekends coming up as well and everyone keeps saying its not long until July!
dinky your post made me lol with the sane members, think every family must have some of each. Shaad sounds interesting, I've been to some Hindu birthday party's, the food if always good

Hope everyone's having a slightly better morning than me. Couldn't sleep last night and then rumbled about late this morning and ripped a huge runner in my tights. Poor DH woke up to me panicking and rushing about. Only two more months of commuting :)

Week 24 today! MW appointment Wednesday.

Beginning - my mum wasn't keen on us having the pram in the house either...but there was nowhere else to put it. OH's grandmother is frowning on my homebirth choice because in her day women over 35 weren't "allowed" to have a home birth...that's about it really though.

Photographerlady - think to yourself that that's the only mishap today - I don't know how you're managing it to be honest.

Sorry I'm on the train nso can't look back to namecheck stuff, or indeed remember most of the conversation!

baddmiss and trust your experiences sound really awful, trust I hope it all gets resolved for you soon.

dinky I like the idea of keeping a few important traditions, but not getting overwhelmed with superstition. If one more person tells me my cat will be jealous and suffocate the baby, I actually will murder them!

I woke up feeling dreadful today, really dizzy and I could barely stand up. Am feeling a bit better now, and on the commute to work, but thought I might be dying this morning. Think I must have slept funny, and squashed all my important blood vessels, especially as I also seem to have pulled a muscle in my lower back. Oh the joys of pregnancy! Chip is kicking away in there though to remind me she's worth it

Hope your day continues to improve Photographer.

Persuasion - there are so many bugs going around you could be coming down with a virus (especially if achy combined with dizzy). Keep well hydrated and take things easy today. If you feel ill again, go home and rest. I'm a great believer in sleeping bugs off!

Re picking and choosing traditions - I think it helps that most of my crazy family are over in India, Bangladesh or the US so its just mum and dad and me and my sister over here - and it also helps that DH is english and, while happy to embrace my culture (especially the eating aspect of it), has his own cultural identity (and fair share of crazy english relatives - though fortunately all in Sussex).

DS2's nursery is meant to have an easter egg hunt today in the greenspace at their school. At least all the snow will make finding the eggs easy to find...

Hey Persuasion - thanks for the well wishes.

On the subject of the cat - silly isn't it saying a cat will purposely suffocate a baby!?!! However, cat's do like warm snuggly things to cuddle up to and it has happened - they like to get in the crib and cuddle up (not all obviously, depends on the cat's temperament too) so if you do have a snuggly cat and nothing phases it, it's only purpose in life is to eat and sleep in the warmest place it can find - then it's probably a good idea to get a net to put over the crib. Yes, you can shut the door etc, but people get tired/distracted etc and doors can get left open.

subject of cats - I have been banning my cats from certain rooms the last month. Mainly our bedroom and the spare (soon to be 6 month old baby's room). Its tough, had to get a spray (smells weird but not harmful) so that they are meowing outside the door, spray makes them back away from the carpets under the door too which is helpful. They are also getting used to sleeping downstairs at night which is the time they run around about like mad.

I have one gentle plump one (would probably cosy up to the baby if she could) and one who is so clumsy, I am more worried about him knocking things over in the night trying to see the baby more than anything else.

All is not too bad for them as they are loving the mornings in the garden after being indoor cats they now get a few hours a day to roll in the grass.