May 2013- boys , girls or the unknown? Over half way there!

[scooby26]

Hi all, new had for may 2013!

10 glad you're home and all's settled for the moment, fingers crossed for good growth next Tuesday.

I'm 24weeks today, feels like a little milestone looking forward to getting some stuff bought and organised but holding off til we're settled after the house move next Friday.

Good news 10 - 25 weeks almost!

I'm counting down to 24 weeks as my next milestone; I'm only 22+6.
I have the worst backache in the world tonight- it started as rib pain but now it's moved to my back. My baby's kicks are getting stronger now and I'm starting to see my belly move now too lol. Had enough of the stupid snow now; how are you all coping? X

Bunny Im sick of the snow.I know I'm being a right girl about it but I don't want to go to work the rest of the week.I don't drive and its do depressing looking at my car on the drive.I really hope i pass my test before baby arrives.I hate walking then having a sudden skid and panicking the rest of the walk.This evening I had to walk from work to boys after school club when I got there I was covered in snow as its coming down heavy here.Then I had to walk home with the boys.I wanted to cry when I got home.

Sorry moan over

beaut this is the list that I have from before with a few of the ones I coudl remember added - but I'm probably missing a few (sorry!)

Boys:19 (picklep, cuppa, beaut, 10, wilde, chottie, betsy, frankie, mwncigirl, secretcervix, artigene, wirrawoo, tas, flaming, seasalt, goldmaple, frustrated, auntydiluvian, jojo020780)

Girls:15 (roast, babygeek, reeny, berri, jenpen, shelly, sparkly, mamabrussels, moll, lolly?, aberjen, beaver, maybe, seven, ukfirestorm)

Surprise:12 (bunny, twinkling, littlespade, terracotta, Geordie, ellypoo, boodstress, geordie, rachy, Scooby, ng, milk)

All is going well here. At my last scan they picked up a strange measurement on the doppler, suggesting that my placenta was starting to struggle. But I went into hospital for monitoring yesterday and now everything is measuring normally - so hopefully it was just a weird measurement. The baby certainly seems to be moving a lot!

Re. surnames - there is no perfect solution. Even when you try to apply feminist principles it still doesn't resolve things. I think we will probably go for my surname as a middle name and DH surname as a surname. I didn't change my name when we got married so it feels like the baby should have at least some link with me in their passport etc so that people know that she is my child when we are traveling etc! I wish there was a good way to sort the problem but double barreling doesn't work so well in our case and then it's just one name or the other.

10 so pleased that you are home and able to get some rest now - enjoy taking it very easy! I just bought the Homeland boxset because I thought it might be good to get into something and spend some time chilling on the sofa - I've heard it's meant to be good.

Take it easy in the snow everyone - I've taken to wearing wellies to work - perhaps not a great look but better than slipping and sliding.

I am so excited! Has anyone else had a 3D scan? DD volunteered to be scanned as a 'practice bump' for training radiologists. She was there for an hour while the students and consultant scanned her bump from all angles. Then the consultant connected the 3D scanner up and it was incredible. We could really see the baby's features so clearly. I really feel we have met him (and it's spurred me to finish knitting his baby blanket :))

Ahhh chottie that's lovely! Yes, I'm in a research study where they scan you every 6 wks so I've had a couple of 3D scans. It's so amazing to see the baby so clearly - really brings it home what is inside there!

Sparkly I have thought about doing the same re names. DS has DPs surname. Have since decided against using mine for this one for a few reasons- We do plan to marry one day and I would change my name. I would also like the chn to have a collective 'family' identity that is not as easy to achieve with different surnames. Finally my surname, though I actually see it as an important part of my identity, is not the best to be stuck with. Not sure it's fair to knowingly force it on my DC when it's not necessary.

I'd consider my surname as a middle name for a boy but it would be quite unfair to blight a girl with it! It's bad enough as my surname!

As for the snow bunny, no I am not coping. I blubbed down the phone yesterday about how I couldn't get DS to his Grandma's (for childcare) as she lives at the top of a snowy/icy hill that I'd have to walk up with DS with my dodgy hips. He could hardly understand a word I was saying through my sobs, poor bloke. Emotional pregnant lady alert!

I am crying at everything right now. I hope I don't do it at the doctor's later when I tell her about my pelvic pain.

23+0

I should have said I blubbed down the phone to my boss just do you know why I was embarrassed about it in the first place.

lolly so sorry you are struggling with your pelvis, mine is really established now and it is like my pelvis is suddenly made of concrete and all the poor ligaments and muscles around it are straining with the weight. One thing I've learnt - heat and specifically baths help at the time but makes it worse afterwards, most physios will advise against many which was my only relief after bending down 350 times a day to pick up cars and Lego. I'm not surprised you were sobbing, it's so blinkin debilitating.

Morning all

Just fancied a wee straw poll. Am having to give HR a date for the start of my maternity leave and, as it's my first, I literally have no idea how I'll feel in a few months time.

I'm aware that first babies can be late, so don't want to spend too much of my (badly-paid) mat leave just kicking around waiting.

So I was thinking about trying to make it to 37/38 weeks. I have a mainly office-based job with some UK travel and my boss has, to be fair to him, been very good so far at listening to me when I say I can't suddenly take up another task at 7pm on a Friday night.

I think therefore it will be ok. But am I being a bit ambitious? What's everyone else planning?

24+3

Hi all. Glad to hear things are going well 10.

Here it's the same old story. Colds and coughs and constantly run down. Blah! Now officially off sick for 2 weeks in an attempt to get over it all. Starting to get a bit worried about delivery and the first weeks as I have no energy reserves at the moment. But it's just a cough/cold thing for goodness sack! Hard to justify being slack. Still, am trying to make myself take the time off and not go back too soon... Decided I probably really did need to take it and stop struggling to deliver after I burst into tears on my boss, so Lolly, you are not alone!

Beaver I left with DS at 37/38. I was exhausted and quite ready to leave, yet bored stupid sitting waiting for him to arrive (he was about 4 days overdue). So I think that was about right. This time I'm tempted to take from Easter, which will be about 35, but not sure yet.

Re names we've started a vague discussion. DH's favourite is a big NO from me, so much so that I'm wondering if he put it there to use as leverage for something else he actually likes. don't have any strong contenders for myslef yet, but don't want to decide too soon, as don't want to tell others until after LO is here.

Beaver I am finishing on the 15th April.Which works out at 4weeks before due date.With Ds1 I worked until 38+5 I really regret not leaving sooner.More so as he was my first and I didn't leave enough time to enjoy my last bit of me time.Plus it was a rush getting everything ready.Ds2 I started maternity leave four weeks before.

This time I plan to make the most of maternity and go to the cinema and do all the things I won't be able to do once baby gets here.

24+0 So pleased to have reached this milestone yay

Hi Beaver I think it very much depends on how your pregnancy is going and how you feel. I know people that felt like they could build houses when they were pregnant and others who were in bed by 8pm every night shattered. If you've had a trouble free pregnancy so far and a reasonable amount of energy then I think 37/38 very doable. I work for myself as a copywriter so I have to take the work when it comes in and I have no commute so its easier. Maybe negotiate a day a week at home working in the last couple of weeks.

Hi Beaver, I'm planning to work as late as I possibly can - right up to the last few days before my due date I think, i.e. 39 weeks plus a few days (though I haven't given the date to my employer yet). I am in a very unusual work situation and feel as though I need to get as much experience as possible before going on maternity leave. I wish things were different but they aren't...

Beaver-

Completely get the not wanting to waste maternity leave- I'm with you and would rather be off with the baby!

With DS I planned to leave at 39 weeks- he came one week early but I ended up being off 10 days before hand as I took some leave unstead as u got a feeling he was gonna come early!

This time I start annual leave 23 April- apprpx 35.5 weeks- that's because I HAVE to take it all before I start maternity ( whole years worth as won't be back before Xmas) and I'd rather take then than now... My actual maternity starts at 39 weeks again.... I'm quite happy with that ad I'll be at home with DS but lot wasting my maternity pay!

Taking a brief break from packing- van due very soon- taking half into storage today and back tomorrow am for other half!

I was intending to start my mat leave on 8th April, will be 35+6, taking the previous week off as annual leave, which means that I would only have 1 1/2 weeks off if baby is born on 10th April (latest I think that they will do the c-section). The way I'm feeling now, I think I'll bring it forward a week, so have w/c 25th March off as leave and then start mat leave immediately after Easter. I have also got a few odd days booked off between now & then so not too many full weeks, but then saving most of my leave until I return on 11th November, taking 2 days off/week until Christmas, then 1 day off/wk in Jan & Feb.

37/38 weeks is def do-able, but it totally depends how you are feeling - could you plan to do that, then use some annual leave to either finish earlier or to have shorter weeks in the run up? Gets them used to you not being there all the time too! Also helpful if you can arrange to work from home some days - I have only been in the office 2 days this week, and I really value being able to work from home - I'm still struggling, but it's not quite as hard.

Hope your packing is going ok so far scooby!! Very exciting, bet you can't wait until tomorrow eve/weekend when you are in & it's over!!

Am also being a total wimp with the snow, normally I absolutely love it, but I'm just so anxious at the moment, I can't cope with the risk.

Hope you are all ok & getting rest and keeping warm etc xx

Beaver - with DD1 I worked to 37 weeks but found it hard (it was a very hot summer and the commute on a hot tube was hellish), with DD2 I intended to work to 38 weeks but begged to leave at 36. This time I plan to take two weeks of leave from 36 weeks and start ML at 38 weeks.

So pleased to hear you're home 10 :)

The surname thing is a funny one. With DC1 and 2 I was married and we all had the same surname. Got divorced and changed back to my maiden name ASAP. Having DC3 with DP ended with lots of discussion about surnames. Double barrelling or putting mine as a middle name just sounded utterly ridiculous (and vice versa). In the end it seemed to mean more to DP than me so I let him use his surname. I think also it would have been hard for my older DC to wonder why one of my children had my surname but they didn't.

We did choose a middle name that represented my surname though. We had looked at what it literally meant and then tried to find a name that meant that too but it was harder than it seemed. So I went with my grandfather's name which I love as a middle name.

It is a bit rubbish having to take a deed poll and/or birth certificates to prove I'm the mother of any of my kids when we travel though. Only been asked once but it felt like once too often. I've even been asked if my older 2 are adopted once :( (although that wasn't when travelling or solely down to different surnames).

The snow and my pelvis and hips don't mix either lolly. Well, nothing mixes well with my pelvis right now really!

I've put in my maternity leave to start at 37 weeks with a week of A/L before that. I'm sure I'll be more than ready by then and I'm also sure that I'll go overdue again. I don't really feel like its a waste of leave though. I know by that point work is horrible so being able to have rubbish sleep and not have work to contend with as well is so much better. With DC3 I think I'd been off 7 weeks including A/L before he came!

Ellypoo- I wish it was all over soon but stuff into storage for two weeks before we get the new house- gotta do it all again! X

Ds3 will be having Dps surname.We will be getting married in 2014.Only thing I'm worried about but not much I can do is my other two ds having a different surname.They have mine and my exps.At school they requested to have mine and Dps so we have done that.They have already got upset on numerous occasions at wanting Dps surname.Ds2 is especially worried that he won't have the same name as DP,baby and I.But no way would Exp agree to the change

Sorry to hear so many of us with pelvic pain, though it makes me feel a bit less worried about it- dr suggested that as it's started 'rather early' so it could be a considerable problem later on. Perhaps it's not so early after all if lots of you have trouble too. Anyway, been referred to physio so hopefully I can prevent it getting worse.

beaver I'm planning to leave at 37 weeks. Whether I get that far, we'll have to see.

Managed to sort a maternity swim suit so got my first aqua natal class tonight. That should cheer me up

Don't forget to tell the instructor about your pelvis Lolly. I am only allowed to wade through the water as exercise, which apart from anything else looks ridiculous in a pool full of people.

lolly not too make you feel rubbish but I started with SPD way earlier this time than any of my other pregnancies.

Think it's been from around 16 weeks this time. DC3 was from around 30w and that was crap enough. DC2 was from 37w (DC1 thankfully there was none).

I'm dreading the last few weeks before baby comes as I know what state I was in last time. I'm being as good as I can be this time though.

Hopefully you'll have a good physio that doesn't just give you an exercise sheet. You need that too but there are other things they can do.