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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

May 2013 - we've seen our babies and our trousers are tighter as we enter the second trimester!

995 replies

SevenElvesAndAReindeer · 16/11/2012 17:53

Shiny new thread. Come and grab a Brew and a Biscuit.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
BeauticianNotMagician · 09/12/2012 18:10

Seven Thank you.Ive never heard of that before. I'm not going for my c section appointment now have just decided to go with the flow.

We haven't really chosen any names yet.A few ideas but we haven't really had much of a discussion about it. I have always found boys names easier although it did take a while to pick ds2s.

GeordieCherry · 09/12/2012 18:35

Went for a bra fitting today. I've been wearing 2 cup sizes too small Blush
The relief!! Bought a 2 pack & a pack of low rise shorts. Going to go back in 6 weeks. Stairs are no longer the enemy!! Smile

wilderumpus · 09/12/2012 18:37

just posting quickly to reply to beaut - YES your bleeding is from the placenta! Not your baby. everything is fine, don't worry! I have started spotting this evening because I have been waaay too busy the past two days (and I know this because I have bump ache too!) Is lovely to know the spotting is not heralding mc, but is a warning sign to take it easy for a bit. I won't go out at all tomorrow and wait for it to clear up... I have learnt how much I can get away with over the past couple of weeks!

So when you have spotting it is your body's warning sign that you are overdoing it. If you keep being active it might turn into red blood and this is a big warning sign to rest up. The placenta has so much blood pumping round it that if it starts to bleed heavily we could get into difficulties BUT we must listen to our bodies and just take it easy and then it won't get that far.

For most women the placenta will move away from the cervix as the uterus grows and takes it along. Then we can be a bit more active I guess. I was told to be active but take it easy, no brisk walking, no proper swimming, just really, really chilled. In general though they really weren't worried about it :)

It's a pain, bvut very manageable and nothing to do with your baby's health

hth - pm me if you have any more q's! :)

wilderumpus · 09/12/2012 18:54

ps beaut I also need the loo all the time still! Is that a low-lying placenta (LLP from now on, please!! Grin) thing?! I also feel the baby on my bladder a lot too, cheeky beggar :)

BeauticianNotMagician · 09/12/2012 19:43

wilde Thank you.I was going to google but resisted as I always end up finding some scare story. I don't know if llp is causing my needing the loo all the time but I just thought it maybe as I didn't have a llp in my first two pregnancies and I definitely didn't still keep needing the loo at this stage it was only really at the very end if my pregnancies.

I'm having a chilled day today and watching Christmas movies as someone suggested up thread. I'm going to try sleep sitting up tonight as I haven't slept in ages. DP is out anyway so ill just grab a duvet and try to snooze on sofa Grin

17+ 3

wilderumpus · 09/12/2012 19:51

glad to be of help, chilling in front of tv sounds like a great plan, I shall follow suite! :) Why do you have to sleep sitting up, hope you are ok.

BeauticianNotMagician · 09/12/2012 19:57

Wilde Just because of this awful virus.I can't breathe well at all and I just cough non stop lying down.Sorry forgot to add that it's nothing bad.

wilderumpus · 09/12/2012 20:26

aw poor you :( have you stuck your head over a bowl of hot water with olbas oil in it? that wouldn't help your cough tho. get well soon, and everyone else who is poorly atm Thanks

Ellypoo · 09/12/2012 21:09

Sorry you are still struggling with the cold beaut, it took me a good few weeks before I started to feel a bit better.

Have had a great weekend - did some Christmas shopping with my sister yesterday, the visited pil in their new house. Today we have put christmas decs up, had friends round for lunch, and watched a couple of Christmas films, just come to bed with horlicks!! I can barely walk now though Xmas Sad Got another 18 weeks - its not going to be easy Xmas Hmm
Back to work tomorrow - cant wait for a break at Christmas!

Sparklyboots · 09/12/2012 21:43

I'm 18+4 and still unable to keep up with this thread, but please be assured I am similarly unspectacular in RL

Still having periods of sickness in the day, which I am complaining about a lot though feel slightly shamed about doing so so vociferously when clearly I don't have hyperemeisis. No bump ache here and can feel baby from the outside (just!) from today, if I am very still and baby is very active. Felt first movements in wk 15, which is more or less form for me as I felt DS1 the first time at 13 weeks, though I was sitting very awkwardly at the time and didn't feel him again for a couple of weeks. Feel very lucky about that, know many don't feel til wk 21/22... DS1 still quite big on kicking, as it goes, don't feel so lucky about that as we cosleep...

Slightly glum about BFing as it is really unpleasant at the moment and am looking forward to the day where I get to declare my boobs private property again... Did love that aspect of my relationship with DS until pg so wracked with guilt about it - poor DS gets delatched quite a lot at the moment. Hoping that as supply reestablishes it will be nice for us both again, and had had lots of rosey dreams about tandem feeding. I hear colostrum starts at 26 wks so am hoping that might start the process of improvement...

Hadn't really planned to come on and complain, sorry ladies, and just want to reaffirm that BFing DS as a newborn/baby was truly lovely (after a shakey start!) and it's only the pg that is making the whole thing so hard at the moment.

Am also on the can't-wait-for-Christmas-well-time-off-work wagon.

SevenElvesAndAReindeer · 10/12/2012 10:04

I had an awful time trying to BF with DD. With her being prem she was too sleepy and didnt have a strong enough sucking reflex, DS was the same. I tried my best expressing, but with trying her on the breast, then bottle-feeding, then expressing it was just too much. The entire routine took nearly 2 hours, and needed repeating every 3 hours. I had no time for myself and even less time for DS, and still feel guilty about my 'failure' to BF now. Though I realise I put far too much pressure on myself, unless I somehow go full-term this time I won't be attempting to BF, I never want to feel like that again. I did express for 6 weeks but looking back I'm not convinced it was worth it.

Sorry, I just wanted to share my experience, I'm not trying to put anyone off BFing, just remember that sometimes it doesn't come naturally and can be bloody hard work. I think if she'd been full-term it would have been a lot easier, for some reason though my body decides to kick them out at 8 months!

OP posts:
beaver33 · 10/12/2012 10:56

Eek, breastfeeding...I have this lovely, wholesome picture of me offering up my engorged tit and DC latching on to it like a pro and being surrounded by smiling family. That's what my desperate brain is telling me it will be like....

Beaut sorry to hear about your LLP. Good they picked it up early and can monitor it, though. You'll be carefully managed, hopefully, which should reassure you. Must've been scary to bleed though, bless you. Any excuse for a duvet day, I say.

We're trying to buy our first property at the moment which is stressing me out and we haven't even made an offer yet! Our mortgage potential is limited because my maternity pay is awful (big private company, NO incentive to go and have kiddies) so we're having to calculate what we can afford based on me earning SMP only. And given I earn substantially more than my DH, things will not be easy.

Anyone with experience of doing this? I'm determined to move by Feb/March so I'm not overwhelmingly pregnant (IYSWIM). Am I in cloud cuckoo land??

18 weeks today! Grin

10storeylovesong · 10/12/2012 13:07

This reply has been withdrawn

Withdrawn at poster's request

Sparklyboots · 10/12/2012 13:13

Re bfing, I think it is a tricky thing for most women to establish especially if you aren't surrounded by experienced bfers and have no idea what a good latch looks like. If you add in complications like Seven's, it's can be very hard to maintain, specially as - and I was totally unprepared for this - the slightest hint that your baby isn't rolling off your boob having gorged themselves on the finest quality hind milk and just about everyone is waving a bottle in your face, midwives and health visitors included (I know! those people who sort of hint that you will go to prison if you don't breast feed are first in line to intervene with formula!). Also, IME people who love you and see you struggle try to help by suggesting a bottle or even saying you're making it hard for yourself if you don't. It is quite complicated.

I would say that for us it really worked out in the end (recent soreness notwithstanding), though it took me and DS fully 8 weeks to get it going properly and he went from the 75th centile to the 0.4th in that time, so the pressure to 'top him up' was huge. I didn't and his weight bounced back (very hard actually - he hit the 90th at 6 months) so retrospectively I'm very happy that we stuck it out. For me, it is worthwhile in the sense that it felt symbolic of the way that (often but not always well meaning) people - family, medical professionals, writers of baby books (fuck the baby whisperer, is all I have to say about them) strangers in the street, try to intervene in your relationship with your children and have you full of doubt about your understanding of your child. So sticking it out felt like a defence against that process, and forms a core of self-belief I have about me and DS, about our relationship and the way it is unshakeable. I should say that breastfeeding itself didn't cause this - but my feelings about it and my experience of it have become tied up in those beliefs I have about the relationship. I feel sure that if I had been in a position where bfing was untenable for us, as long as I made the decision about introducing formula rather than being pressured into it, then I would probably feel the same about feeding formula. I've met several mothers whose own decision to introduce formula was a core part of them empowering themselves as mothers, just as I see bfing in our circumstances as a core part of how I found my own power as a mother.

Anyway, sorry for the essay. Re property buying etc. - I moved from Yorkshire to London the week before I had DS. It was fine, but I have planned a more relaxed pre-birth period this time... Do you have to disclose you're pg Beaver on your mortgage application? If you are sure you are going back and your credit is good and you can handle it, I can recommend an unsecured personal loan as a mat-pay supplement. You have to take the amount that would allow you to make monthly reps on the mortgage plus the loan amount, and either have a pay-off-at-or-by-end-of-mat leave strategy or be able to cope with payments on your reinstated wage.

ng1412 · 10/12/2012 17:03

Hello all, checking I again after a long while. Have read all the posts but have no memory so apologies. I will say though LittleB my heart goes out to you x

I have been baking today, well making veggie pasties. This was done more out of desperation than anything else as my 19 month old DD has gone on dinner hunger strike which I suspect is caused by the same boring food. So I am trying a new approach. I am not hopeful that it will work though. She is a particularly fussy eater these days.

Breast feeding for me was tough at the beginning, probably took a month or so to get the hang of it and for the pain to alleviate, but it was such a lovely experience that I am so glad I did it. It isn't for everyone and sometimes it just doesn't happen. My DD self weaned at about 12 months when I became pregnant (unfort ended in a mc). The self weaning was actually the best result for me as I didn't have to make any decisions about when to stop.

Anyway, got an amnio booked between Christmas and NY, nice! Am keeping my fingers crossed it goes ok...

17+1

GeordieCherry · 10/12/2012 17:13

Beaver do you have to move? Sounds stressful. Totally understand all the nesting instincts & all the reasons to be in a bought place (sorry if I've missed a dead obvious bit in your post; on my phone with a weeny screen & rather tired). Boo to your company & its crappy MP Hmm

Re: BF. I really hope it works for me too. Got such intentions (& bucolic soft focused romantic visions) & I know it doesn't work for everyone. Community MW are being v encouraging about it but at least one of the pg friends I have here in my adopted city isn't intending to & apparently that has an impact...

beaver33 · 11/12/2012 09:31

Geordie yes, unfortunately. We won't be able to afford our current rent once I'm on maternity leave based on DH's salary alone, and being in London means the only way to really reduce that is to buy. Rent is astonishingly high - but it's really hard to get the deposit together for a house because prices are so high for property. So it's a vicious circle. Fingers crossed we're in somewhere by March, otherwise I'll cry...

Bunnychan · 11/12/2012 10:53

beaver I kinda know how you feel as my dp and I live with my parents so we've been looking at housing options too. We've just been accepted for a shared ownership scheme (part rent part buy) but our house will not be ready until next spring/summer. Meanwhile, we need to get another £4800 together for our deposit! Eep! But this was more cost effective than renting and meant a smaller deposit x

SantasWildeRumpus · 11/12/2012 12:01

Helllooooo

Am very happy today because I am 18 weeks! that sounds proper pregnant doesn't it :)

Arf I read a LOT about BFing before DS was born and asked friends for advice and sort of got the 'theory' down (latch and position), and luckily for us it worked a charm. The first few weeks are hard though even if the baby latches and feeds wonderfully - spraying milk everywhere at 2am, 4am, 6am was not fun! At 6 weeks though I sincerely believe everything just settles down, if you can just hang on till then! Personally I loathed the night feeds and envy FF peeps whose partners can get up in the night too. I was so tired! I look forward to doing it all again though! Xmas Confused And DS LOVED being on the boob! whatever was upsetting him I could just bang him on the boob and he would chill out and snuggle and I would watch tonnes of boxsets and eat cake He still tries for a grope now when he is ill/tired!

seven ds wouldn't wake for feeds either (tho sucking etc fine, osrry you had complications) I did not know that babies might not wake to be fed! There is so much you just don't know until the baby (and boob!) is there Xmas Grin

oh moving beaver. I shall be moving too then from yorks to cornwall so we can hold each others hands through the stress and conflict! Not buying yet tho.

GeordieCherry · 11/12/2012 13:53

Oh bloody hell Beaver stress Hmm
You poor thing. You'll find somewhere to be by March defo

MaybeAMayBaby · 11/12/2012 17:24

Re moving. My very good friend did it the WEEK after her first DC wa born. The mad woman. She still has nightmares I think. Definitely do it before if you can ladies.

My liver bile results came back normal after the itching thing last week. But, my blood pressure is rising. There is talk of meds. Got to see midwife every two weeks for testing (on top of clinic appts every other two weeks!). Anyone ever had blood pressure meds while preg?

ng1412 · 11/12/2012 18:21

Yes we moved overseas when my DD was 5 weeks old. Definitely move beforehand if you can, our experience was very traumatic!

Ellypoo · 11/12/2012 19:52

Moving can be stressful enough without having a little one to sort.

Seen MW again today, and listened to the heartbeat which was great - starting to have massive paranoia that there's something wrong - scan next fri, can't wait! We aren't going to find out what we are having if we can help it, although one of DHs clients is a MW and has looked at our 12 wk scan pic and thinks its a boy, so we'll see!

frankienoodles · 11/12/2012 23:59

Hi everyone, haven't posted again for a while it's all been quiet recently for me between appts. But I've been lurking

just got back from a lovely birthday in Budapest and it's a case of back to reality with a crash. The mice who have taken over our under kitchen sink have returned with a vengeance after all ready claiming one dishwasher and God knows how much piping.

we have blocked holes, covered vents, laid poison and emptied cupboards to no avail and they keep causing damage. I got back from the airport today shattered, found another leak and promptly burst into uncontrolled tears! I know. ridiculously melodramatic!

Its probably hormones too but they're costing us so much and causing damage, and I worry constantly about fire etc.

it's sending me loopy!

does anyone aftershave any advice? maybe I should be posting this somewhere else but I needed to share the crazy pregnant woman side of this!

sorry for horrible rant... do you ever have a day that just finishes you off?

xxx

17+4

frankienoodles · 12/12/2012 00:01

aftershave any advice??? I meant have any advice. don't know what autocorrect was going for there