May 2013 - roll on 12 weeks!

[DizziDoll]

Thread n2 for those due in May 2013

crunchy nut they are selling the large 750g boxes in Tesco at the moment for £2! Another one eating a lot of tuna!

wild oh I do love rag rugs soulemama style so that is an idea. No it's probably just going to be a large knitted blanket, calling it a rug was a bit grand of me.

pickleP my family aren't unsupportive but they do think me mad. Think their is also a bit of eye rolling too, thinking I run screaming to the hospital with the first contraction.

But they will be massively unsupportive ( possibily even a little emotional blackmailing too) if they find out I intend to co-sleep.
A newborn baby in our family died and has been termed a co-sleeping incident. It wasn't IMO the father fell asleep on the sofa with the baby and was a heavy smoker. So nothing like safe co-sleeping. Regardless I will be doing what I feel is right for the baby and I.

LittleB - are you planning on co-sleeping in your bed or using a cosleeping cot? I totally intend on cosleeping, but I am going to use either a babynest or an armsreach, and then probably go on to a bedside cot at 6 months. I did partially cosleep with DD until about 9 months (i.e. she would come into my bed at some point in the night, but start off in her cot) but I found sharing the bed really uncomfortable. I totally want to make it easy for myself and keep this little one as close as possible for as long as possible!

littlepickle I'm a bit undecided. I am buying a Moses basket for daytime sleeps and somewhere safe to put down baby. I'm thinking of going without a side cot, just sleeping with the baby in my bed but I may use the Moses basket for the very early days.
DH will be sleeping in the spare room so it will just be the two of us.

Still spotting and trying not to worry. :(

All I want is junk too...yesterday I was still in the hospital w/my friend and actually felt like fruit and veg...had lots at the hospital salad bar and some lovely berries. Then today it's been right back to wanting toast and french fries!

cheerful oh no that must be worrying. I know when I was spotting it felt very far from normal no matter what others say.

I've got my first appointment with GP tomorrow, am stupidly excited for it to start feeling real!

We've only told a few close friends so far, putting off the whole interfering parents thing til the first scan. MIL has been buying baby stuff and nagging us about having a baby for yeeeears. No doubt she will be trying to palm her tat off on us when we tell her, which wiL be annoying as we live in a postage stamp!

I haven't had any MS so far either pear, apart from gagging out half a mouthful on way to work this morning. A passing runner gave me a funny look! [Blush]

laura is gagging not ms? I don't think you have to be actually sick to have ms. It sounds embarrassingly delightful!

Please don't make me have one more prune :-( yuk!!

laura at your MIL buying stuff years in advance! I would insist everything she buys you keep at her house for when you visit.

pear I include gagging and general nausea in MS.

I seem incapable of eating a meal lately I can't eat anything more than snack food. I'm worried about my complete lack of nutrition at the moment. Yet I am food obsessed, right now I'm thinking of yummy tuna sandwiches I'll have for dinner tonight it's not even 8am!

cheerful hope you are okay. Sure it is just normal.

laura my mam has a pile of knitting all done and just waiting for a new baby has done since I was about 19. But I do think it is sort of sweet.

Can't get my head around some of you thinking about sleeping arrangements yet. But then I'm slightly preoccupied with working out what non-man and me are going to do immediately after birth. And trying to get the courage to ask if he wants to be at the birth - which I'm not I feel about.
And then there is the thing about baby's surname.

Still no MS does this mean I wont get any ? I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

I'm exactly 10 weeks today

tuna! yuk!

hope you are ok cheerful how are things with you?

I co slept wioth DS, we had a side cot so we could put him in that if we were feeling squished but tobh he never ever used it as he could just TELL it was a different bed. Different mattress, different smell. I slept cushed around him and BFed that way too. Am so sorry to hear that there was a newborn baby death in your family littlebairn. Cosleeping stats against cosleeping often incorporate deaths from smokers, obesity (fat people squashing their babies in bed/on sofa, it is true and not safe to cosleep if you are obese) and falling asleep on the settee. I had a battle on my hands trying to convince MIL and SIL that BFing in bed lying down while colseeping safely was SAFER than trying to keep doing in by sitting up numerous times a night, relegating yourself to the settee and then falling asleep :(

anyways.

laura your MIL has been buying stuff already?! 'eck.

Am shattered but child free today, I think DS is pox-free enought o go back to childcare. I am going to buy DH a fancy coffee maker online for his b'day and then slope upstairs to do some work...

is it too early to be crving some maccy dees fries?! thank goodness there isn't one within walking distance!

Re: co-sleeping, have bought a book but not read yet. For those that have done it or know more about it, is it not very difficult to introduce baby to their own bed eventually? Because they've got so used to having you there and on-tap so to speak? Just curious as i like the idea of co-sleeping but that's my only concern. My SILs all co-slept and they were much less sleep-deprived then some mothers i know who didn't.

Morning all.I just ate a whole bag of fruit pastilles really craving anything sweet.

I will definitely not be co sleeping.In fact ive never had my ds's in my bed which suits me fine.Its the one place i feel i can escape from it all.I won't be breast feeding either.I'm sure the midwifes will love me.

9+4

ha beaut! Actually the MWs might have something to say but the health visitors will be on your side more than the BFing cosleepers (in my experience, and I am in quite a hippy area!)

pickle all babies are different so don't worry. Mine didn't sleep in his own room until he was 18 months but I BFed him until he was two anyway and he was a terrible sleeper, and actually he didn't even have a room to go to until then! At 18 mths we moved house and he had his own room, a proper single bed (mattress on the floor so he couldn't fall out) and was chuffed to bits. still slept dreadfully but this was his personality, not anything to do with where he slept.

ah, babies... sleeping... they do what they do.

and also 'cosleeping' doesn't have to be 'we all sleep in a family bed all the time till they are 14', but just you know, can be a bit here and there. most women end up taking the bubs into their bed even if just for a morning snuggle. I don't like the black and white cosleeping/not/'who is doing it best' arguments, they make my foot itch

wild the stats infuriate me because I know they don't separate what was an accidental co-sleeping accident and those who properly co-sleep. The baby could well be alive today if his parents didn't follow the guide lines of never sleeping in bed with a baby so his dad go up with him.
I just hate the way it's forced as the ONLY way rather than give people safe sleeping advice and let them make up their own minds.

Umm I've been thinking about McDs fries since I got up, might have to pop out later for them. That said the idea of food makes me queasy....

milk regarding the birth I would wait awhile and see how you feel. I know it's his child too but it's you giving birth and it's a very personal experience, personally I don't believe in anyone's right to be present at the birth.
My DH will be close by and will be there as soon as the placenta is done with or he may stay at home in another room at home but he won't be present for the actual moment of birth.

I think im hoping for a baby that sleeps like my last two.I bet i get the opposite this time though.Ds1 was bf for 2 weeks and Ds2 12 days.I found it painful and produce so much milk i just didnt seem to ever get relief even after expressing.Both ds slept through from 6 weeks old although i had them in my room for a year each.

milk sounds like you might have been let off ms! lucky! though I can't complain really either tbh.

don't worry about the birth yet lady! and definitely don't feel obliged to share the birth with him if you don't want to but then again, it sounds like you guys are quite sweet on each other in your distant on-off way?! (sorry if misinterpreted posts :))

fuck I'm tired. self motivation is NOT working today!

Milk ? I second what others have said, only have non-man in the birthing room if you are really comfortable with it. Birth is an intensely personal experience, anyone in that room will see you at your most vulnerable and little will be left to their imagination. The most important thing is that you are supported by someone who you are totally relaxed with. No advice on surnames (I never changed my name after marriage, but when I was pregnant with DC1 we were not married. During that pregnancy I told my other half that if I did not have a big sparkly diamond on my finger before my waters broke then the baby would have my last name. He proposed at 38 weeks...)

Re co-sleeping: DCs1 and 2 were by my side but in a moses basket. I would lift them into bed and BF them while lying down. Often I would fall asleep so they co-slept my default for part of each night. For the first few weeks I loved it but after a while I realised I was not sleeping deeply with them in the beds and a half asleep baby still partially latched on to your boob can really hurt. One time I dreamt my nipple was being stung by a wasp and I swiped the ?wasp? away, only to wake up to find myself swiping tiny DD2 . With DCs 1 and 2 I BF exclusively until they were over a year. With this one I intend to give one bottle of formula from week 2 (once my milk is in and established). That bottle will be the middle of the night bottle and will be administered by DH. That way I will be able to get a few uninterrupted hours in before having to wake to feed the baby. By the time my feed comes up it will hopefully be the early hours and I will be refreshed enough to feed sitting up and return the baby to the moses basket so I can sleep deeply again. This is my plan, we will see whether it works. I hope it does because last time I got really ill from exhaustion and I need an alternative approach to avoid that happening again.

beautician I'll be joining you in not co-sleeping or BFing. Both DS and DD were a month premature and hadn't developed a strong enough suck reflex, both times I tried by best to BF and felt like I'd failed and let them down, I don't want to feel like that again, for me it wasn't worth it.

I may be going to McD for my dinner now - thank you ladies :(

I wont be attempting to co-sleep but I'm sure baby will end up in my bed. I was at a lecture once and it is very unlikely that you can accidentally kill your baby while sleeping. (unless you are very very over weight, drunk etc) your natural instinct is always engaged. Even with people who don't co-sleep they fall asleep with their children on them or on the sofa and things. Your subconsciously aware of it. Plenty of other societies and culture co-sleep until children are a lot older. There was a midwife on that BBC midwife programme a few weeks back who told a couple that cot-death happens when people co-sleep. I felt like screaming at the telly.
Will be bf though (not sure how it will work with DC going to non-mans) but cross that bridge when we come to.

I know I shouldn't be thinking about birth yet - but can't help it. Thanks for the advice though RT, wild and little I get that it's personal and no ones right. But lets say he wants to be there I wouldn't be comfortable just saying no to him - at least I don't think.
:D RT about your DH. Very sweet. We both come from large families where name is important. So I don't know might ask what he wants (even though he will say his surname)

wild oh he is lovely and and so fit he is just a nice guy and I do fancy the pants of him. I think the feeling is mutual. but we aren't on or off at the moment somewhere in between.

awwww milk! fingers crossed for you two :) And I was actually shouting at the tele about the cot death BS on the midwives programme - she also said another 'fact' that was bs too but I can't remember now :( bloody 'health professionals'.

sorry about the McD thing. I lust every day but have managed to resist. you know why?! because it gives me tummy ache with all this 'slow digestive transit' malarky! otherwise I would be all over it, like, well, a pregnant woman on McDs!

brain is in a seive today. Anyone else have days like that. Just completely forgetful. And my boobs hurt so much. SO much, like proper growing pains. they have grown a cup size already.

Hurry up shopping delivery! I need me hash browns!

8+4

littlepickle I LOVED that Guardian article, brilliant.

www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/jan/23/pregnancy-first-trimester-symptoms

9 +3

Hi ladies - just sat at work eating lunch (mmm hosin duck flatbread from itsu - helping my meat fetish at the moment) catching up with all the news. For those MCing/spotting etc my thoughts are with you all x

I had a lovely w/e with my closest girlfriends and came clean with them (too much talk about what diets we were on etc and decided I didnt want to spend the w/e lying) - all over the moon as they all have 2+children each and knew I was dying for our second

seven beatician - I will be with you too on the no BFing and no co-sleeping debate ... my DD was a month premature and like you seven everytime I tried to BF her bloodsugar levels headed south and they threatened her with the special care unit - so I moved over to formula - and given thats all i know and liked the flexibility of it - its what Im going to stick to (also v easy for husband and our nanny to join in the feeding fun!) ...also co-sleeping DD was only in our room for about 10 days before her piggy snuffling noises got too much and I booted her out to her own room (so harsh) ...

Got my early scan this friday and feel like I am holding my breath all week until then ... the usual concerns of will there be a heartbeat and will there only be one!

Oh I remember that program too I was very but even though the mother couldn't understand English well you could tells she was doing an inwards eye roll and would ignore her.

milk I'm of the opinion it's never to early to think about birth it's a major life experience I wouldn't risk being under prepared.
If you don't feel you can say no then maybe sit down together and discuse boundaries like where you want him to sit, don't be second guessing your decisions. Maybe show him some YouTube birth videos to make sure he's a aware what real birth is like the good calms ones and the more intense ones.

In regards to overnight contact you are well within your rights legally to refuse any for at least the first year and are protected fairly strongly in law if still breastfeeding.

I'm a bit feminist about the whole surname thing and feel unless your married and changed your name the baby should have its mothers name. I hated having a different surname from my mum, even thought my parents have been together all my life!

uh-oh...I NEED scotch pancakes!