March 2013 Mk V: Lumpy bumpy witty knitters (patiently) await the bloom!

[Chefette]

New one marchers sorry on phone and can't link! Will post title in our old thread x

Sundae, I think that some maternity clothes make you look much more pregnant than you are. My denim mini skirt does as I wear the bump band turned over because my bump isn't big enough yet to warrant having it over my tummy, but of course that doubles the material around my belly. If I wear that with a tight top I look proper pg. But I generally don't - for exampe today I am wearing my pre-preg straight jeans with a bump band (well open, I might add), with a lovely Mary Portas jumper that is big and baggy and will deff see me through the third trimester. My denim miniskirt won't. It's alreadya bit tight by the end of the day - but that's mostly because it's a 10 and I'm a 12.

Hope everyone's doing well this morning.

Weehee, just had my 16 week local midwife appt and, after much perseverance on her part, I got to hear both heartbeats! One is a noticeably slower than the other but both within normal range. Also have put on two kilos, so I'm back to my 6-week pregnancy weight! Ridiculously elated by all this.

Three my DH is the same, but definitely getting better over the 3.5 years we've been together! Occasionally he will spontaneously sweep the kitchen floor and I try to accept this as normal and not faint in amazement

Ood poor chuck. Hope you get some idea of what is causing the knackeredness from the blood results today.

Sundae glad you're taking it easy and looking after yourself.

Sheldon, hope hospital appt goes well!

Tramp interesting to hear what you say about faith schools. I think I'm a bit 'itchy' about religious schools not just because of my own schooling but also because both DH and I grew up in two of the Lancashire towns which featured in the 2001 race riots where a lot of schools are still segregated (the school my mum works in is 99% Bangladeshi because white parents locally refuse to send their kids there, despite the fact it's a really good school - yep, they are still stuck in the 1970s re race relations?). This is to confuse issues of religion and ethnicity, I know, but I just wish all schools were little microcosms of ideal societies. (I know this makes me sound really dim, but my Catholic school was so anti-other forms of Christianity, especially CoE, that I had it in my head for a loooong time Catholics weren't Christians!) Anyway, Oxford is a v. different place from my hometown so shall stop worrying about it for now.

Of more immediate concern is the cost of childcare! DH seems to have been living in some kind of la-la land in which childcare costs £5 a day. Last night I showed him how much, for example, local nurseries will cost for two babies full-time (not that we'll do that for a while, I think) and went very pale about it all. But accepts the logic of childcare being short-term investment for my future earning potential and sanity. Fingers crossed we will luck out with finding a good nanny first, as I think that's the cheaper option.

Oh also thank you to everyone for your congrats on my team blue. I must admit to having a slight pang for the girl I'll never have; I'm a very crafty/arty person and my son just isn't; I was hoping I'd get a girl this time as my horrible gender-sterotyping-inner-Daily-Mail-reader insists that she would be more likely to 'get' crafty stuff. Believe me, I tried with my son - he had a pink tea set and dolls and art kits as well as tractors and lego. But as I'm sure almost everyone who has kids will attest, the pressures on them to conform are huge and it's tough to resist the tide of gender-specific toys and 'stuff'. He does like cooking and baking though, which is my other great love (I can change a plug and hike through a rainforest too, promise!) so I'll settle for that. And yes, I know my new boy might be completely different. It still hasn't sunk in. I think once the 20 week scan is done I'll start to believe it. And am also counting the weeks to viability, as that's a big one for me (my son was born at 26 weeks, viability's 24). Eight weeks to go!

Manda, have you looked into au pairs? I know it sounds a bit 1970s but if you have a spare room it's even cheaper than a nanny and at the moment there are some amazing Spanish ones looking for work because of the terrible economic situation in Spain. A friend of mine has a fully qualified teacher working as an au pair for her. Sad for the teacher, but at least she is working, which she wouldn't be in Spain.

That's a good idea, Sarah, thanks. I hadn't looked into this much because of the accommodation issue. We've notionally got a 3-bed 1930s house with two big rooms roughly equal size and a smaller (towards a box-)room. Babies will go in the small room whilst they are wee, mainly because I work from home / don't have an office on campus so the other room will remain my study (floor to ceiling books and filing cabinets, a third of which I will pack up and store so I can make space for DH's desk and books and geekery).

We have been looking into getting a loft extension, which could be perfect for an au pair, but we had a loft company come over and a mate who's a surveyor and because the roof comes over the walls of the house so much there is v. little space up there and they both said it's basically not worth doing, dammit (unless we were prepared to lose the back roof and build a box on, as one house has done, but we don't want to lose the original shape of the roof).

Re new boy, hope you can enjoy those early crafting years with him before he gets 'boyified' and - who knows - older one may get back into it seeing how much fun you're having? I think (based on zero experience, of course) if you introduce a range of stuff earlier then they can always come back to it at a later stage. Nice that DS is so into cooking - that's a lovely thing to share (and his future life-mate will thank you for it!) Eight weeks to go is a pretty good place to be, I think! Rooting for you.

It is very hot in my office and being hot makes me feel sick. My colleagues keep turning the aircon off!! Argh!!! I have a desk fan but when I have it on they put coats on. I don't see how anyone could possibly be cold in here!
Ugh, how long until I can start maternity leave?

Congratulations on team blue Sarah - you never know, you precious LO might turn out to love crafts . If we have a little boy, I'll be trying to encourage his creative side as much as possible too.

I can't wait to find out the sex of our little bean. Am seriously considering going for a private scan (for reassurance that it's still there and as an added bonus to get the sex) in a few weeks time. I initially thought we were having a girl but now I think our bean is a little boy. For no reason other than a 'feeling'. Does anyone else have a 'feeling'?! Maybe we should do a poll and then see how many of us were right once we've found out/had the babies?!

Sheldonella I have a similar issue at work, in that all the other girls in our office are always cold (come in wearing several layers when I'm still wearing short sleeves!). As a result the office is hot (and if the sun is out then it's even worse)! I guess I'll still be wearing short sleeves in the winter too. Do they know that you are pregnant and that it's making you feel sick?

Trouser update: so having got my trousers closed for the past two days, today is a different matter and I'm back to wondering around fly checking every two minutes. Also feel a bit sickly (haven't felt sick for a few days - lucky me!). I have been getting sharp stabbing pains on my left side (low down) today whilst sitting at my desk so I'm hopeful that is ligament pains which is a good sign that things are progressing as they should be .

Will be before you know it shel honest, sympathies though.

Erm so i'm having a moment at work, got a bit physically weak and shaky. Am sat down now on a comfy chair in the networking corner and my friends have fetched me some tea and some cake from the cafe. Maybe I used up my whole weeks ration of energy on the housework, oops.

I would love to live in the £5 a day childcare land manda! I'd be able to come down and get theTramp to take me on a spree!

Emus is that what the pain is? Been having pains on and off on one side today, sometimes sharp and sometimes scratchy.

Pretty sure I have felt bean several times today, in bed this morning I was rubbing where my fundus is and then felt a squiggle.

I really want a girl, so we shall be having a boy! My sister had a boy, he is a gorgeous one year old (nearly!) so I wouldn't mind a boy, but would feel a bit lost with boy parts and things!

Three, poor you, hope the cake helps!

Thanks ladies. I've been outside for a bit and feel better now. Three I hope you are ok, work stress seems so much worse at the moment doesn't it.
Exciting new though - I think I might have just felt a flutter! Quite low down on the left. Might not be but exciting anyway :)
Just off to the hospital.

Sundae are you 14 weeks today are we due date buddies, apparently our beans are the size of lemons

I've been getting stretchy like pains and can't get up too quickly

Manda wonder if the Bpm theory is true and you're having one of each

I love all the guessing but don't think I'll find out this time

Ted loved the dress

Oh and good luck Sheldonella

Sarah I get what you mean about the girl thing. I was really happy to find out that I was having another boy but had a kind of sad moment thinking about the daughter I will never have. My ds1 is very crafty by the way and loves drawing and making things so boys can be like that. Maybe your new boy will be too?

Manda we have an Au Pair and she's amazing. I have an Australian girl who is 26 and so a bit older than normal but I wanted someone who could cope with the chaos of 3 boys. The boys love her and ds2 is always asking when she is coming back downstairs to play with him. I was very unsure of having someone living in our house but it has been totally fine. When she isn't working we hardly see her. She is also very tidy which was important to me! I love the flexible hours. She does 25 hours a week spread over the morning & afternoon (school run times) & we pay £90 p/w.

Tramp I hope you feel better soon. I am 17 weeks tomorrow and honestly feel amazing compared to how I felt in the first trimester. I have energy (I have even stopped taking the Floradix) and have spent the last week doing all the jobs I didn't have the energy for in the 1st 14 weeks! I am really appreciating it, especially because I found the end of ds3's pregnancy really hard and so I know this feeling might not be for long!

Three Cake sounds like just what you need. I hope it helps.

Mmm coconut cake with creamy frosting, yum yum :)

I'm lucky with CC as my mum looks after dd3 when dh/I are both at work. Usually 1-2 days a week. Rest of the time it's one of us.

No answers yet as I've spent most of the day going to & from the garage (1/2 hour each way) and dh work (1/2 hour further on) as we had mot and dh forgot his lunch and is on 10am-11pm so was a chance to see him. Then wiper motor broke on way home so returned to the garage

So tired of the tiredness. Am in bed every night by 8.30-9, asleep by 9.30. Sleep through to 6.30-7. Still had to have a kip this lunchtime in the medical room. When will it STOP?!

Back from hospital. It was about my blood pressure but I've been discharged as it was 114/82 today. I also mentioned the horizontal nail ridges and they said it sometimes means vitamin deficiency. Does anyone know anything about this? Surely vitamin deficiency in pg is bad?
sarah I feel for you. I'm not tired every day anymore but the days I am it is awful. I'm still going to bed by 9 too.

Phone call to antenatal clinic today:
Me: hi I'm trying to chase up a surgery date.
Clerk: is it in relation to your pregnancy?
Me: yes.
Clerk: okay, are you pregnant?
Me: erm, yes?
Clerk: and you're due to have surgery whilst pregnant?
Me: yes.
Clerk: what is the surgery in relation to?
Me: the removal of a cyst on my right ovary.
Clerk: you're having that done whilst pregnant? (in a VERY judgemental tone)
Me: yes.
Clerk: have you had A discussion with the consultant?
Me: yes, I saw him on 13th and he called me on Tuesday.
Clerk: what did he say?
Me: that he would book the theatre and contact me by the end of the week.
Clerk: well he's finished for the week now. There are notes on the system.

End phone call and burst into tears for two hours!
So, someone somewhere must be having a good day?

jojo the lady soldier who gave birth in afganistan without knowing she was pg maybe?
War v AN stress, what d y reckon?
Clerk sounds awful though :(

joJo I can't believe how terminally and consistently hopeless your hospital are! Sympathies to you having to deal with it on top of everything else. You might feel it a whimpy idea, but would it be worth getting your OH to call on your behalf? Sometimes if I know i'd be prone to being emotional about it, it's just easier for him to call as he's better then me at just keeping going, politely, till we get what we need instead of me giving up in an emtional heap sort of a way. I suppose they might only speak to you though!

Sarah I'm 16+1 now and still utterly exhausted. Flagging by about lunch time and in bed before 9pm most nights (unless I'm asleep on the sofa and DH doesn't wake me to send me to bed till later!). Often fall asleep on the sofa as soon as I've finished putti DS to bed, so that'd be about 8pm.

Today we have a poorly DS. He was apprently fine until just after lunch but then rapidly got very high temperature and childminders called us to pick him up as he'd got very unwell. He has said his right ear hurts and it feels hot so I'm guessing ear infaction. Our problem will be that so far he's not managed to fight one off on his own, but has had an allergic reation to all 3 types of antibiots he's tried so far so I excpet he'll be poorly for a good few days whilst we try to avoid the antibiotics and then if we try another set who knows! Fortunately his reactions haven't been worryingly severe, not affecting breathing, but still not plesant. His eyes particularly and face generally have got very puffy (which worries me that if we don't catch it early enough it could start affecting breathing) and he's been covered in a fairly severe urtacaria rash. Still, with experience we've caught it earlier each time and not allowed the rash to become as bad even when docs have initially insisted the rash is a viral rash not reaction like last time and we must continue the medication, proved him wrong the next day, nor did we continue as per his advice!

Still, after my 7am start at work today I got a little afternoon nap with DS! I opted to come back from work today since it will be harder for me to be off tomorrow so DH will be off tomorrow whilst I work late. Urgh

Jojo - how terribly helpful, what an idiot. Good job you have a good consultant who actually knows what they are talking about. I hope you were frosty with the Clerk.

Pinky - thank you. I was feeling rough as old boots today but decided sod it, so answered emails, then went upstairs & baked a ginger cake which I then took round to a friends for tea, cake & a natter. Now feel refreshed, albeit still a bit ropey and the ginger cake was lovely - although next time I will increase the ginger quotient I think. Not bad seeing as I experiemneted by playing about with a trad recipe.

3fortea - hey, if you are in London and fancy a shopping trip, even if its just a fantasty one (try stuff on, experiment with new image, actually just get free make up done in department store) just shout.

Shel - I am one of those ladies who is always cold. I can happily sit in an office wearing fingerless gloves & a scarf whilst a colleague is in a tshirt & sweating. So on this one I'm afraid I will side with the cold women. You're clearly abnormally hot! :)

I'm v interested in the au-pair, nanny chat. I'm looking into nannies and we're talking about a nanny share with our friends who are due in November, as I'll need one in April/May and she's meant to be back from maternity leave in June/July. It looks like London prices are £10-£15 an hour for a nanny, live in's are cheaper and au-pairs cheaper again, although I had thought au-pairs were better for older kids.
My thinking is if I am to keep working then I'll need someone who can look after Socs between say 8am and 6pm, but as either I or MrM will be in the office, which is downstairs (but seperate) to the house we can oversee if needed and pop in at lunch time etc. For friends, who have a longer commute, this is more flexible for them in terms of picking up their little one and dropping them off, and it works out at about the same cost or cheaper than a nursery, which seems to be about £1,500-£2,000 a month for under 2's.
Live in was something I looked at but had discounted on basis of whilst we have a nice big house we only have 2 bedrooms, 2 very large bedrooms but only 2 bedrooms. Also, I would rely too much on someone else if they were here all the time and I would like the routine of work time - home/life time for evenings and weekends.
It's all in research stage at the mo' though.

Now to persuade MrM to make me the tea he didn't make me yesterday so that I can finish the document that I ditched earlier today.

For anyone who needs cheering up - and apologies to anyone who has one, but this has had me in stitches. www.asos.com/ASOS-Maternity/ASOS-Maternity-Fur-Hooded-Coat-With-Pom-Poms/Prod/pgeproduct.aspx?iid=2410406&cid=5813&sh=0&pge=0&pgesize=200&sort=-1&clr=Tan

Evening everyone - have been so poorly last few days I haven't even been awake long enough to post its been awful! Starting to feel a bit more human now but am in bed!

Glad everyone is well and feeling for all u that gets hot- I am the oppersite right now and am always freezing - I don't think I have been warm in days!

Well went for my scan today and baby once again had hands over face, consultant tried to sneak a peak at babies sex but it kept its legs together and refused to move them so got to wait till next thursday now!

Zoey - sorry to hear you have been feeling rough, but how nice to know baby is a ok and so modest too.