Due in October 2012 - Part 5

[Kyyria]

Just starting us off on a new thread

Hello - I haven't been on it ages and have so much to catch up on. Congratulations to everyone who has had good scan news and sorry to everyone who has not, or is having work/parental/in law etc problems.

We had our second scan this week and everything was fine. We didn't find out the sex, but the gynae said: "You can rest assured it definitely has a sex, it's not a snail." So that's good?!

We have managed to find the Phil & Teds pram/buggy/travel system thingy we wanted second hand for £250, which is really good as they are rare and not at all well known in France. Picked it up last night and suddenly felt very grown up pushing it home and negotiating the Metro with it.

I have just discovered the reason so many women have epidurals over here - apparently they don't do gas and air in French hospitals/clinics. This has come as quite a shock. I am now terribly nervous about the birth as I really, really want to avoid an epidural/C-section at all costs. I know this is naive, but I at least want to try on gas and air only. The fact that I know it's not even an option has actually really freaked me out.

This, combined with the fact that we have to move flat and finding a new rental place is proving to be a complete nightmare, has conspired to flatten my mood a tad.

Oh, and the pesky doctor stuffed her fingers up my fanjo again today to check my cervix... this time with a student watching too, grrrrr!

Hi Ladies, had my first ante-natal class today! Someone here had a question about alternating sides to sleep on at night - we were advised that 1) no sleeping on the back 2) left side is best but 3)alternating sides between going to the loo is good as well.

Smorgs - also found out that the epidural rate in Belgium is 95% so we were really advised to ask what the rate is at the hospital where we will be giving birth so we have an idea what their particular approach is. I'm also a bit worried about the statistic because I at least want to feel that I have a choice.

For those of you suffering from back-ache etc we were given some advice on exercises and the like (no slouching on the sofa) - so all in all, a good couple of hours.

Writing & running due to hectic couple of days...

MrsConfusion - Happy Birthday! My DP's also desperate to feel a kick. I keep telling him when baby has hiccups (has happened 3 times now :) and is visible and feelable) but he keeps missing the boat.

I've read all your posts and have lots more to comment on but will have to wait until tomorrow, after all morning errands done if I have time before afternoon SC/MIL birthday duties.

Happy Birthday also Velo .

Evening ladies :o Hello to everyone, I just can't keep up anymore!

Squid don't feel bad about taking as much time off work as you can - you'll be glad of it when the bean arrives :) Especially if your back is sore now - mine twinges some mornings too and I keep thinking "I'm not quite 24 weeks ... what will 34 weeks be like?!"

Smiley it's funny with the section the way you kind of nearly know the date isn't it?! Think mine will be 16 weeks ago yesterday, 1st Oct. Either that or the Friday before - assuming of course bean doesn't put in an early show!

Bella the job worries suck, don't they? It all feels totally medieval having to worry about this stuff in frigging 2012 :( Try not to worry - at least they are involving you in the process so hopefully you will return to semi-order rather than chaos! :)

Happy birthday MrsC Mine in a few days, lots of chatty Geminis on this thread :o

Please everyone stop talking about luscious rare steaks, oh god getting all dribbly and Homer Simpson here, rarrgh! :o With red of course!

Cushions wise I have a few - wedge ones for under bump which usually escape, big MC one which is v comfy but can't be arsed using yet as it's a PITA to roll over with and a cheap ass Argos 'boomerang' shape one for between legs which does help, especially if I tuck the end under the bump. Saw a very groovy one on NCT website which is apparently graded as a medical device or some such fabulousness so might be worth checking.

Definitely getting the odd back / hip twinge some mornings now, maybe 3 out of 7, worse at weekend when I lie in. First few steps across to the ensuite I hobble like an old woman . Also (TMI alert) in last few days bean seems to have taken up permanent residence on my bladder so CONSTANTLY running to loo, desperate, only for a thimble full of pee to emerge . She also seems to like dancing and / or lying on my fanjo and kicking me in the bladder which gives an odd drum-like sensation

If I'm honest I can't say I madly enjoy pregnancy - apart from the movements. I love the little kicks and punches when not on my bladder :o

Oh and Squid I am loving the quote "most women couldn't do a shit under the conditions we expect them to give birth" :o So true!

velo that's great advice about asking each hospital/clinic what their epidural rate it, I hadn't thought of that thanks. I can't wait to start anti-natal classes...

Woohoo!! Just a quick pop to share my excitement! Mega moving baba last night and delighted ecstatic DH got a feel!! Woke up at 6 this mornign to him hand on tummy AGAIN going, I can feel it!! Also got an acrobatic show of it moving across my tummy, pushing as it went!! Hello baba!!

Will check in and catch up later, just had to share! Mega long day ahead, roll on 6.30.....

Morning all

Gosh we can talk

Congrats to all those scanees, newbies & happy sleepers!

CWest My scan is also at 22 weeks but oddly just because that?s the way the local hospital do things!

I know lots of people have bought things alreddy but we?re waiting until after our 2nd (officially, 4th unofficially!) ultrasound to do the mass purchasing but we do have a very long list of crap essentials to get. We?re also still paying for the decorating, carpet & furniture for the living/dining room & landing that we had done a few months ago so really don?t have any spare £££ any way!

smileyhappymummy also a BIG believer in knowledge & feeling in as much control as poss is the way forward. Yes, childbirth can be massively unpredicatble - I read all the childbirth stories on Mumsnet, I find them oddly fascinating weirdo - BUT there?s no reason for us not to prepare (where we can) for the event.

MrsConfusion your post re: DH cuddling you and feeling the baby for the first time was so cute!! Made me And belated birthday greetings also

squid I second what Angelico says about being a brilliant quote - absolutely spot on! And makes me think all the more in favour for a homebirth, where I?m likely to be far more relaxed than trekking to a hospital, fighting for 45 minutes just for a parking space, rushing to the labour unit, just to be (likely) abandoned (no offence to all MWs out there, I'm generalising & exaggerating massively for effect and have no knowledge of what will actually happen obviously!!) until the midwife & I have an argument over whether I am actually dilated or not and whether I should be pushing? see, I haven?t even had a child yet and I can imagine all the scenarios!!

I'll probably substitute pasta for Ben & Jerrys ice cream though or a huge slab of cake

Have good Wednesdays everyone!! We've broken the back of the week, yay!!

Hurrah for hufflepuffle's wriggly baba saying hello to DH, how exciting!

Many thanks for all the birthday wishes, much appreciated (especially as usual more of DH's family remembered my birthday than my family.... oh dear that makes me sounds really whingy, sorry). After stressful day at work I escaped to try my first aquanatal class. I was a little sceptical but actually it was really good! An hour in the pool doing various exercises (baby pool so nice and warm) followed by an hour's tea and chat with the midwife who runs it (very good to be able to ask questions as my midwife is not very forthcoming, and NCT doesn't start until Sept). Then out to dinner with DH (trying to make the most of just-us time), then collapsed into bed. Very tired this morning, really should know better than to have a late night during the working week, but definitely worth it.

It's days like this I miss being able to glug a strong coffee to kick-start the brain.

Waves to all the other Geminis lurking on the thread!

velo the class sounds really helpful, do keep feeding in information you find out. I'm alternating sides (luckily this is how I usually sleep) but turning over in the night is becoming increasingly complicated with sore back/hips and the huge sleep pillow to content with. I'm sure I'm going to fall out of bed one night soon!

Who was is who recommended the Caesarian book? Got mine today, on the basis that if it happens to me (e.g. Emergency) I want to know what the hell is going on.

Thanks very much, just as you said it is an excellent book - sensible, and (oh thank God, at last) full of references to proper peer reviewed journal articles. Top stuff as a general-purpose birth book IMO.

I must get that book too. Have the option this time round of whichever birth I fancy so feel I need to know more about ELCS. Currently thinking I'd rather go the traditional route but if I end up needing to go for a section i would like to suck up as much info as possible. (waves at everyone)

Evening all! :)

Zoe glad you liked the book and Midget definitely recommend it :) I really liked the CS hospital bag list as it makes you think ahead - I am going to get one of those clip on bed water bottles for example as they have a long tube so you can drink easily without constantly reaching / asking for water. Also good to know to get big knickers that come up above scar! :) Thought it was useful too the section on 'preparing your nest' e.g. have everything you need on a table beside you to avoid getting up and down loads, have things raised to waist height to avoid bending etc.

MrsConfusion that aquanatal class is a great idea, must see if there's one near us! :) Know what you mean about pillow. Squid I can report that I tried the giant MC slug one last night and while v comfy I didn't sleep that well with it and back killed this morning :( The cheap Argos boomerang between the knees still works best for me and kind of turns with me IYSWIM.

Huffle the movements are cute and glad your DH liked them :) Can't remember who it was before (Beeble or Lisbeth maybe?) but someone's DH wasn't that keen to feel them - and now I am finding mine the same! The thing is, he is quite a squeamish type so probably shouldn't be surprised - but did tell him off the other night. It's his bean too ffs!!! This bean will arrive needing therapy at this rate - he shrieked like a woman the other night when she gave him a right hook through my tum :o :o :o Was actually hilarious but I hope he comes round to it all. He just isn't madly keen on discussing bodily functions etc whereas I come from the bawdy female tradition of talking about everything.

Did have a strange one today - in work at lunchtime between some very hilarious stuff about birth etc 2 girls I'm friendly with (know I'm having section) tried to out-do themselves with horror stories about sections. Thing is both of them had emergency sections where they were basically ripped open to get their beans out asap - and one did admit that her ELCS was much better. Bit like those of you getting freaked by awful VB stories - I was like, "Well no point telling me this stuff really because there's a bean in there and she's coming out one way or another..."

Saw lovely consultant man again, my BP is up a bit, probably because I wrote about 8000 reports today, also trace of sugar in urine He said not to worry as apparently most of the time it doesn't mean diabetes, just your bladder is more likely to release sugar in urine when you're pregnant because of some hormone thing. Getting seen again in 2 weeks though to check the BP isn't on the creep. My sister's BP has been very high in her pregnancy - we have loads of family history of high BP so probably a bit doomed to it tbh :(

Jeebus, this is an essay even by my standards! Enjoy your evening ladies x

God I'm tired - just popping on to say hi. Centenary week at school so lots of stress and late nights as we are putting on a quite a show. Then next week is test week, week after is sports day, olympic week and more trips then an InSET day which as year leader I will be expected to get fully involved in, then it's puberty week (always a bit stressful), then I can maybe start to relax a bit at work.

Something someone told me about nappies - it's worth avoiding buying too many in advance as not all nappies fit all babies well. Apparently Asda own brand are good though.

Squid, your bump is tiny, it's lovely, but fuck, it makes me look huge :( I daren't post a pic of mine :(

Paris was gorgeous but boy is it tiring walking around, and up and down Metro stairs, for 4 days. A big thumbs up for the bump support band sold by Babies R Us though, it made a huge difference to how comfortable I felt.

Glad to hear about lovely stories about feeling kicks, sorry about work woes, and what is it with people telling you horror stories about birth? I'm starting to get quite cross when people do that. C-section book looks good. I ordered a homebirth book which arrived last week but no time to even look at it yet to see if it's any good - will report back.

Saw Prometheus last night. Don't bother! Only good thing about it (spoiler) - it appears you can run around a lot after an emergency C-section!

Off for tea (pizza) and a QI DVD. Hope everyone is well.

Hello again all,
I'm absolutely knackered this evening - sat on the sofa doing not a lot while poor dh cleans the kitchen in preparation for the estate agents coming to take photos tomorrow morning. He is very nice to me!
Squid, if you can afford the annual leave time then definitely go on mat leave sooner rather than later, can totally see what you mean about not wanting to get used to a new job when really you're never going to have a chane to settle I there. And don't feel bad about it either - you work v v hard and deserve a chance to have some time off and enjoy pregnancy.
What's everyone planning to do about starting mat leave? I'm going down to 2 days a week from 29 weeks though partly that's so I can look after dd during school holidays but was thinking I might have a go at working a couple of days a week up till 38 - 39 weeks - could probably find some locum work within 20 mins drive of home for that time so wouldn't be toooo bad... But am I just being a bit ambitious?
Bump is looking massive and wiggling lots. Love the feeling of baby moving while I'm at work, makes me feel like Ive got company . Friday is the repeat anomaly scan, hoping baby is a bit more cooperative this time around!

TMI entry:

So, I guess third trimester is well and truly looming for squid! Just had acrobatic sex session with boyfriend where for a while I was quite happy on top revelling in my sexy bump, but then when we shifted I refused to be on my back, or front, and then had sex knelt up hugging pregnancy pillow, then had sat-up sex against the wall where I at least managed to wait until it all finished before wailing "ahhh ow ow my hips" -boyfriend is all, what what, are you ok -and I jump out of bed to limp off and stretch out cramp in the back of my left knee (!??!) for about 20 minutes before saying "er sorry we can go back to bed to snog more now, sorry it was all great until I felt like my pelvis was DISLOCATING"

In happy news, was chatting to a girl in my yoga class last night who is 38 and a half weeks, looks great, feels great, and is out socialising with her friends every day. Maybe I won't be doomed to the sofa after all!! Have been having cabin fever at the thought of what everyone tells me to do with maternity leave, sit there eating and watch box sets, my boyfriend's idea of heaven, but not mine.

ps. have 95% decided to finish at 32 weeks and despite pregnancy weight am suddenly feeling light as air. I want to learn to oil paint (pictures of squid! for baby squid!) and grow herbs on my huge windowsill and hike and swim and take train journeys to see all my friends everywhere who get a bit neglected with this bloody doctor thing.

Yay! Good for you squid (the finishing work at 32 weeks thing as opposed to the pelvis dislocating during sex feeling...)

Yay! Good for you squid (the finishing work at 32 weeks thing as opposed to the pelvis dislocating during sex feeling...)

Wow, three people posted whilst I was needlessly describing my sex life...

Angelico Good tips on the section thing... will bear in mind. And at all the people who feel the need to gloat about their horror stories. No bloody need!! Repeat mantra: fear and stress make labour harder. I'd rather listen to good stories thanks! That is the majority of women after all. Not saying I'm not sympathetic or interested if someone had a hard time (my sister-in-law had a rubbish 3-day labour ending in a section... then again my other sister-in-law had a 4 hour labour and went home the same day!)... I just don't get why people feel the need to be so doom and gloom. My boyfriend's mum is the same, but not with birth, with cancer/illness. She's forever calling us up to tell us about some unfortunate person she barely knows with some horrible disease. I'd be sympathetic if these were friends of hers, but she just loves the morbidity of it all. Wow, that was a tangent.

Yomping your upcoming month sounds mental! Wishing you loads of strength. What on EARTH is puberty week, that sounds horrific. I guess you finish late July though?! Will you restart in September, I hope not. I am buying reusable nappies and totally confused by the whole thing. Think I'm going to buy a cheap batch of ebay, dayglo colours too! I hate waste. I'll prob buy disposable newborn ones though, just as apparently they are often too small for reusables, and also to save me getting the hang of the bucket/washing machine/nappy system for the first week or two.
(ps I think my bump is a bit small too, but midwife was happy enough with it)

Smileyhappymummy thanks for your wise words. Almost everyone is telling me the same. Though the very pregnant registrar I know did tell me today that she once started a new job at 35 weeks and not to let ANYONE tell me to stop work. Er... thanks for that. She looks like she's dying rather than pregnant. Go lie down, lady! Stop guilt tripping me!
Anyway, your plan of going to 2 days a week at 29 weeks sounds great. Are you a GP partner, are you normally full-time? The thing about working till 38/39 weeks is that you can just play it by ear, can't you... I think I'm right in saying if you take sick days late in pregnancy it just triggers your maternity leave. So if you want to, why not, if it's too hard... you can go off sick and start maternity leave anyway, and what have you lost? Good luck with your scan. xxx

I currently do 2 days a week of hospice work - which is employed work - so will be going on proper mat leave from that and getting maternity pay (though unfortunately just smp as hospice is not nhs but charitable organisation). Then the rest of the work I do is GP locum so self employed and completely under my control... So I can pick nice places to work which are close by and where I like people when I'm more pregnant... Think I probably just need to warn them of how pregnant I will be then when they book sessions so that they are aware i might end up letting them down, that's the only bit I'd feel bad about. As for v pregnant registrar doctors do like to compete for who can be the biggest martyr to the job sometimes, but there aren't any prizes and I don't think anyone really ends up wishing theyd spent more time at work in the end! So ignore her and enjoy your plans!

Yomping, glad Paris was good, am tempted by bump band too now. And good luck with surviving your hectic time, sounds utterly mental!

The sun shone this morning and I was super cheery, cycled to work feeling awesome and feeling v.encouraged about second trimester bloomingness. But at lunchtime I then had a sudden wave of nausea. I've then spent the whole afternoon feeling hot then cold then dizzy then coughing then nauseous and came home (on the train), had a sit down on the platform feeling horrid and have now come home to sit on the sofa and mostly feel sorry for myself.

AND I somehow screwed up the sainsburys order and it didn't go through - so we're totally bare cupboards and I feel horrid and WOE IS ME.

Sorry for the moan folks. I now feel guilty cos I'm a useless fiancee who can't even order food, I haven't done any studying and oh MAN.

Can't wait til Monday and the scan so I can find out whether all's good with pepe - I haven't felt ANYTHING yet and though I think I know (intellectually) that that's not significant, it still worries me a bit.

Right. off to bed with this moaning minnie. Hope everyone else's day has been better. sounds like yours definitely was, squid ;-)

londonlivvy how far gone are u?

I'm growing increasingly worried every day as this is baby no 2, I'm 19 and a half wks pregnant, and I've barely felt anything yet. I get the odd evening of "bubbles", sometimes I get this sort of "shifting" fringe in my tummy, but I would say 95% of the time there is just.....nothing.
Like I said, my scan isn't until the 2 July which feels like an age away. I do see the obstetrician next week, so I shoud get to at least hear the heartbeat, but I even worry with that, how do they KNOW its the babys heartbeat and not mine?
I'm sure with my first I was beginning to feel proper kicks about now so just can't understand it.....I'm just petrified something is wrong, Ive been really stressed out throughout this pregnancy, what with High bp, constantly feeling ill, temp job worries, trying to sell flat and buy house and bloody in laws I've really had enough. Any reassurance ladies?

Sorry that shod say sometimes a get a sort of "shifting" THING in my tummy lol x

Cwest I felt movements from very early, but my midwife still said to me she wouldn't worry about any variation or pattern or even if I felt them at all until 25 weeks. One of my best friends is pregnant now too and she didn't feel anything until well after her 20 week scan. Even at 25 weeks the position of some women's placentas means they never feel hardly anything. They will know it's the baby's heartbeat because yours goes at about 70 and baby's at about 160! If there's any query they will check your pulse to ensure the two are different.

I hope that's some reassurance... it's really hard not to worry... I do about all sorts of things.

I'm 20 weeks tomorrow cwest so I guess too early to be a concern (as squid says, it can be some weeks yet) but worrying nevertheless, particularly as I've got stomach cramps that feel like period pains. :-(

Ouch. Boo. Etc.

I totally relate on the stress front too, cwest, It's been quite a year.