Charters Anonymous Graduates Volume 2! – No more temping!

[Iwish]

A nice cosy place to accommodate our growing bumps and little wrigglers.

Excuse the french but fuck me my BH contractions have been painful tonight. I think it's made worse by some trapped wind I have plus the fact that I had a flat tyre on the motorway and had to stand on the hard shoulder for an hour waiting for the aa. Baby's head pressing very hard on my pelvis too.

Hope feeding is getting there iwish

nix I remember DD being very unsettled and colicky until 12 weeks when we nervously put her to sleep on her tummy. Bliss. It worked,she started going 12 hrs and even now at 3 she sleeps on her front.

Lol at the nappies split! I love the thought and the look of reusables but I'm using disposables.

at man boobs nix. He must be enjoying his grub!
Feeding is going ok but Omg my nipples are sore! They are sore when my clothes scratch against them and have a tingling pains but when he is feeding I get a strange pain as if it's hurting dragging the milk through my boobs. It makes my eyes water! will this go away? I have been putting nipple cream on in hope that it helps.

Sorry the BH have been so bad mrsa have they calmed down now?

DS is being a pain in the arse! He doesn't want to be put down. Last night he had a feed at 4:30am and I changed him and put him in his Moses basket and he moaned, cried and whinged until I picked up, he kept doing this until 6am!! I did try to ignore him but I couldn't. In the end DP cuddled him until he fell asleep then I put him in Moses basket. He is getting worse every day/night. How can I just make him go down without moaning to be picked up?

Iwish great news that feeding is going well. bf will be strange at first while you get used to it but it shouldn't hurt long term so keep at it.

Re settling - at that age, no tips I'm afraid, DS just needs you. If it were me, I wouldn't change his nappy unless he was dirty or very very wet and I would feed him to sleep or have him sleep on me. It won't last forever. Or maybe try co-sleeping? DH may have to sleep elsewhere while you get used to it perhaps...

Above all - this will pass.

Iwish ours is a bit like that too re. moaning when you put him back in the basket. It's so demanding. There really is no solution I don't think, until the stage passes. I am determined not to let him sleep in our bed though. We have given in and resorted to a dummy, as it seems to help. Have you tried a dummy? Re. the breastfeeding - well done for persevering! I find it is a lot less painful now, 3 weeks in. The first week was excrutiating and the second week was sore but bearable. It's now much better, but I have to make sure he gets a full mouth-full of boob otherwise he sucks on the nipple which is sore, and not effective at getting the milk either. Have you got a breastfeeding drop in clinic locally? Our one runs once a week at the local children's centre, and is really friendly and welcoming.

We are getting on really well with our washable nappies. They are not much extra effort than disposables, they don't leak, and I'm really chuffed at not making so much waste this time, not to mention the £££ we are saving. Also really love my washable wipes, which are loads better at getting poo off little bottoms than packet wipes

MrsA hope your contractions have settled down. When my braxton hicks started getting painful it was early labour So keep an eye on them

Well I'm slowly trying to get DS to feed from me without the nipple shields. He has so far managed it twice today for a couple of minutes each time! Yey Joshua

mrsa I'd be a bit scared with him sleeping with us, I held him last night and fell asleep for a hour accidentally and totally freaked out when I woke up. The Moses basket is right up to the bed tho.

getdown we have tried a dummy but he just spits it out after a couple of minutes then cries again so I end up spending ages giving him the dummy back lol.
Yeh we have a bf group on a Monday which I think I'll go to, I only found out about it today. I'm feeling good about it at the moment but the last few hours he has fallen asleep while feeding so is hungry again 1 hour later. Hope he's not like that through the night!
That's fab about your nappies, my little mans nappy had a lovely leakage today - poop all up his back!

Hv came today too and weighed him, he now weighs 8lb 3oz. Last week he was 7lb 6oz.

How's it going now iwish?

And how are our pg ladies doing?

yes, hope it's going ok iwish

Hello spilt I'm 35 weeks tomorrow. My IM has done a HB at 35 weeks, so I'm cautiously getting my hopes up we will succeed! The hospital swears it hasn't been informed of my IM (despite 1 letter and 2 calls) so keeps trying to set up consultant appts that I have to cancel (or not turn up to if I forget to cancel, oops!). But apart from that, all is well and I feel good.
Just want to finish work so i can nest a bit. Not for anothetr 3 weeks!

How goes it with all the new/not so new anymore borns?!

Hello all, glad to hear your updates. :)

Got my first scan on Friday and am very impatient to see if there is an actual baby in there! .

Oh wow MrsA, hats off to you for working until 38 weeks, and with a young DD as well! I was cream crackered by about 34 weeks and very glad I'd stopped early.

I'm definitely finding the baby stage easier than late pregnancy. The bone sapping tiredness is gone and I can walk fast again, hurrah! Back to my old tricks of over taking everyone, even with the pram, compared to ny pregnant hobble where even old ladies with sticks and shopping trollies sped past
The last week or so has (in general) got a lot easier too as I get to know DD better. I'm getting better at spotting her tired cues and getting her down for naps, which makes her a lot better tempered. And she has started putting herself to sleep sometimes if I put her down drowsy which reduces the amount of incessant bobbing, swaying and rocking.

As far as settling babies goes though, I gave up with that at night couldn't be arsed and have just been co sleeping for the last few weeks which has been so much easier as I can feed her to sleep and doze off myself. And I love it and am secretly disappointed when DH manages to settle her in her moses at the start of the night.

GetDown, how often do you have to change your Flips? I am having to switch the pads about every 1-1.5 hours!

Ooh jaggy good luck for Friday! Is this the dating scan?

Yup, dating scan for me. I am kiond of fed up having a big secret too tbh, hope it goes well and I can finally tell people!

Hello spilt (and everybody else).

I'm 38 weeks today and feeling pretty uncomfortable now. In my second week of maternity leave and extreme tiredness has hit, so making the most of being able to sit with my feet up. I am looking forward to being able to walk fast again!

Good luck for scan jaggy!

The feeding is going ok. He has only managed to feed strait from the breast a few times. Otherwise he feeds fine using a nipple sheild. He does seem to be permanently attached to my boob tho lol. For the past few days he has been feeding sometimes every hour! How can I get him to take more so feed less frequently?

mrsa well done for working so late! I finished at 35+4 which was a Friday and my waters went etc at 37+4. Got a whole 2 weeks off work and didn't do any nesting lol.

split it sounds like you are doing fab with your little girl. How many weeks is she now?

mrsp cant believe you are 38 weeks already!! That has gone so fast. The tiredness is awful isn't it, it's hard to sleep at the end too.

Good luck for your scan jaggy. Let us know how u get on xx

iwish he will be feeding so much to build up your supply which is good early on. it's normal to feel permanently attached i think, so try not to worry about it if you can!

i remember feeling like i was going a bit nuts with the constant feed, Nappy, feed the first few weeks but it does settle down! honest!

scan appointment isn't till lunch time, so I'll be on later in the afternoon with update...

I feel like a milk machine jaggy lol. I don't mind during the day tbh but he is such a pain at night.
We go up to bed at 10pm. Try and put him down after a feed at 10pm but he's up till 2:30am fighting sleep, wanting more milk or generally crying because he doesn't want to be put back down. So 2:30 I drift off and he is awake again between 4:30 and 5:00am, feed him and change etc, put him down, fights sleep, cries, wants more food/ cuddles and drops off at 6:30am then up again at 8:15. I'm absolutely shattered because he's practically the same during the day :(

Roll on lunch time, can't wait for you to report back :)

iwish firstly, huge well done from us all for getting bf established after such a difficult start. I gave up with DD so good for you.

Even if he is using nipple shields, well it's not the end of the world - still mummy's milk.
On the plus side, once you've got things established he may well easily take a bottle of expressed milk to give you a break.

In the evening - are you trying to cluster feed? I ask cos whilst DD was ff, she was very like a bf baby in her habits and tended to feeed feed and feed from about 7pm but then did sleep longer at night.
In the evening, try to settle on the sofa with him and the tv remote and just feed for as long as he wants, even if it's hours - you may find he settles easier perhaps? Or you may already be trying that so please ignore me!
You may have the dreaded colic - DD had this from about 3 weeks to 12 weeks (once of the reasons we tried to cluster feed at night). From 8pm to midnight she would not settle, except if I put her in a sling.

Ultimately we solved it by putting her to sleep on her tummy and watched her like a hawk.

With this one, I intend to carry him in a wrap sling in the evening if he shows any signs of colic and feed all evening, assuming I can bf (fingers crossed I will).

But, keep remembering, this will pass and will not be like this forever. Keep going, you are doing brilliantly.

spilt I change DS's flips every feed, about every 3hrs. They are usually soaked, but I don't get any leaks (usually!) . Am that you have to change yours every 1.5hrs!! Your DD is a little widdler!! Shows she is getting lots of milk though

Can't write much as in a rush (as usual!) but DS is doing well, he went 6.5hrs last night which is a record! Probably just a fluke though. Iwish I TOTALLY sympathise re. the feeding every hour!! DS was like that too, but trust me IT WILL GET BETTER!! Hard to believe when yuo are so knackered but it will. And WELL done for breastfeeding, you are doing so well!! My HV did say I could express some in the morning and give it to him in the evening. This helps them go longer at night. Ask your HV and see what she says.

Good luck with scan jaggy

Waves to MrsA, MrsP and everyone else.

Friday lunch time just seems so far away!

at work so will catch up later once I have actually done some work...

Thanks mrsa I am really proud that we are BFing. We are slowly making progress and yesterday and today he has even had part of a feed without the shield
I just tend to feed him when he's hungry. Maybe I will just keep offering him the boob tonight and see If I can get him to settle tonight. He does seem to suffer from wind so we have been giving him infacol for about a week. Trying to get him to part with wind is hard.
How are you feeling?

Wow getdown 6.5 hours is fab, hope it's not just a fluke and your little man sleeps as well tonight. I wouldn't mind feeding every hour If it was earlier in the evening instead of until 2:30am .
It is only a few days he has been this bad, when we first brought him home he used to go down after his feeds and sleep 3-4 hours between feeds. He's going the wrong way lol.

iwish how old is your DS now? It's possible that switching to the boob has coincided with a growth spurt, in which case the frequent feeding is normal but will calm down soon. Otherwise, are you using both breasts when you feed him? Try to keep offering him the breast for as long as he'll take it at a feed. If he falls asleep after a short feed then you can try changing nappy/winding etc to wake him up so that you can then try feeding off of the other side. Good luck, it's very tiring! As he gets more practiced at the BFing then each individual feed will speed up as he'll be more efficient at getting the milk out so you will get more rest. You're doing really well, be proud of yourself

GetDown thanks, useful to know your frequency for nappy changes - I was starting to think the nappies were rubbish, but it appears its just DD's overactive bladder!! Fantastic that you got your 6.5 hours last night. Fingers crossed for tonight.

Not too long now MrsP (though I know it doesn't feel like that!) Enjoy some hot cups of tea while you still can. Infact, my top tip for baby purchases is an insulated mug with a lid. I wouldn't have had any hot drinks in the first month without it, but DH could make a mug of tea for me when I started a feed in the night, and an hour or so later I could drink it, piping hot

spilt thanks for reminding me about the insulated mug - must dig mine out again - was very handy with DD.

iwish if DS is very windy, could it be to do with your diet? the say avoid onions, cabbage etc - basically anything that makes you windy as it can cause windiness in babies.
spilt is most likely right - he's having a growth spurt and your supply needs to adjust. Come xmas, you'll be plain sailing! By xmas, I'll have a 4-6 week old... gulp)

Joined my local bf group today - going to pop along before baby arrives I think.

Good idea re. insulated mug (drinking luke warm coffee as I type).

Grrrr. I am getting frustrated. All my plans just seem to go down the toilet. Really really wanted to get to a local mums group this morning, but plans scuppered. Raced out the door this morning at 8:55 to get DD to school - DS literally scooped out of bed still wrapped in blanket - half out the door and realised all down his back was wet! No time to change him, so just had to go anyway, plus he really needed a feed, boobs were exploding I really really needed the toilet too . Realised pram still folded up in the car. Car parked too far away to be bothered to go and get it. Arrrgh.

So it turns out 6.5 hrs the previous night was a fluke. Up every 3 hrs last night. So sat at home feeling sorry for myself.

Hope your nights are getting a bit better iwish.

split he is 3 1/2 weeks now, growing fast. I hope it is a growth spurt and he will calm down now. I offered him the breast more yesterday and he did take some more- yippee! How is your little princess sleeping?

Thanks mrsa I will have to keep an eye on my diet. The hv told me that caffiene can make babies windy too so I've completely avoided that too. Bet you can't wait till Christmas, it will be so lovely with both children.

getdown getting out of the house is awful isn't it! We try to go out and he needs changing then he wee's all over himself so change of clothes then he needs feeding etc, can't get anywhere lol. Hope you get to go to your group next time.

Well Joshua was an absolute angel last night (didnt think I'd be saying that a few days ago). Fed at 9:30pm, awake at 1:30am fed and changed. Awake at 6:45am fed and changed and still asleep now at 10:30am!! We kept him awake a bit more during the day and when we put him to bed instead of just putting the blanket over him I swaddled him which I'm guessing worked a treat

Iwish yaya Joshua! See, it will get better. He probably will take one step forward, two steps back but you will slowly see progress.

It's easy for me to say as I'm not sleep deprived atm, but try to accept this stage for what it is - he is learning about the world and you are getting to know him. Before you know it, he'll be a tantrumming 3 year old (like my DD) who refuses to cuddle you as she's too busy getting Peppa and George (her stuffed toys) to sleep or who would rather watch tv than talk to you. I still look at her and think where the bloody hell did my newborn baby go??!

Getdown sorry you've had a crap start to the day. Is DD at school properly ie you can't miss it? That must be hard. I have a feeling DD may miss nursery some days when I just won't get going but by lunchtime I'll be tearing my hair out no doubt.

One question for you, as you were similar to me with feeding DD I think, now you have bf established, how are you finding feeding when out and about? The privacy thing doesn't concern me (my boobs, tough if you don;t like to see) but the sheer practicalities overwhelm me. Do you go out when DS doesn't need a feed or do you just find the bearest cafe/bench and what is getting them latched on is tricky?
Sorry, I'm probably thinking ahead waaay too much but with DD we were out and about when she was just over a week old and I'm worried I'll be housebound for weeks whilst we get bf going.

Hi MrsA DD's at nursery so it's not compulsory, but I kind of feel like it is IYSWIM. It's 9-12, and getting out for 9am is such a killer. DS usually sleeps soundly all morning and it's frustrating that I have to be up and dressed and not be able to sleep in a bit in the mornings. SIGH.

Re. the feeding, I'm not that confident out and about yet TBH, but am getting there. I fed in Costa the other day, but DH was with me and that helped. It was quite busy and a man came and sat at the table next to us and I didn't feel that comfortable, but I've got one of those breastfeeding covers which is like an apron with a semi rigid neckline and that helps a lot. Also I got to the breastfeeding clinic this afternoon (hurrah, my one achievement of the day!) and every one had their boobs out, and it gave me more confidence just being around other breastfeeding mums.

I think in some ways it is more convenient than bottles, because you don't have to make up feeds, sterilise, warm it up etc. So when we get more confident I think it will be easier to feed wherever, whenever. I do kind of try to time my going out when DS has just finished a feed, to maximise my chances of not needing to feed out though I don't think I'd be able to get him to latch sitting on a park bench, I certainly wouldn't feel relaxed enough. And so much about breastfeeding is about how YOU the mum feel - if you are not relaxed the feed rarely goes well as I am discovering! I don't think you need to be worried about being housebound though. It really does you good to get out, and there's no reason why you should be stuck indoors just because you're breastfeedng. Is there a breastfeeding support group near you?

Iwish so glad to hear you had a better night. Makes such a difference doesn't it. Here's to more and more better nights for all of us!!

Hope MrsP is doing well, all quiet from her today???

Where's pippa? pippa you were quoted in the MN swears by email this week. I was proud

Public BFing... I still find it quite stressful, but it is definitely easier if you aren't the only one. When I go out for lunch with my NCT ladies and their babies there are boobs galore and it feels like safety in numbers. Like GetDown I usually try to give her a bit of a feed before going out because the feeds just go much better at home as we are more relaxed, but if she's hungry when I'm out then I just need somewhere to sit and a trusty muslin for mopping up the absurb leakage and I get on with it. She's quite good at latching herself on now which helps a lot. Have to admit the practicalities of bottle feeding out and about overwhelm me. It sounds hugely complicated and hassley so I am very impressed at those of you who have/are managing to do that! All the rules about temperatures, sterilising, I am sure I would poison her!

GetDown I am in awe of you out and about before 9. I count it a good day if I am dressed and able to go out by 11. I'm sure this will improve, but everything seems to take forever just now. I love you FB pics btw. He looks so snuggly in the wrap.

Hope you have a good night again iwish Info here on growth spurts by the way. Advance notice is always nice