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48 replies

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 17:37

Hi all. I’m in a dilemma. I have a photo of our expected Little one at 12 weeks from our 12 week scan. My husband is really happy for me but really wants a boy as it’s our first. (Must be a male thing) can anyone help to distinguish what we might be having before our 20 week scan due soon x.

Cannot add photo yet.

OP posts:
MoralBeryl · 25/01/2018 17:45

OP, what is it that you actually need here?

Nobody can make any kind of guess without a photo. They may also be wrong.

Are you worried about your husband’s reaction if it’s a girl?

EsmeeMerlin · 25/01/2018 17:53

There are different theories about determining the sex from the 12 week scan but these are often guessing. You will find out soon enough.

Are you worried about your husband's reaction. It's not normal for men to want a boy that much they would be upset with a girl.
It's 50/50 and it sounds as if your husband needs reminding of that.

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 18:21

'm not sure I think he will be happy for a girl but he seems a bit down that it could potentially be a girl. I know deep down he would be happy though even if it was a girl. That's my dilemma if he was to find out it to be a girl he wouldn't be angry or anything crazy like that at all. But it's our first x

OP posts:
MoralBeryl · 25/01/2018 18:23

I don’t understand what you mean by dilemma. What difficult choice do you have to make?

Fekko · 25/01/2018 18:23

Wants a boy? Are you 18th century royalty?

PotteringAlong · 25/01/2018 18:24

What dilemma? It’s either a boy or a girl and it’s pretty much 50/50 either way...

NapQueen · 25/01/2018 18:25

If your dh doesnt want a daughter then he shouldnt have tried fot a baby.

And no one can guarantee anything til the 20 week scan and even then it may be wrong.

Maybe if its causing him this much distress he should arrange some counselling.

BIWI · 25/01/2018 18:25

Tell him not to be so ridiculous. You're having your first child together, which is a reason for celebration, regardless if it's a boy or a girl.

autumncountryrose · 25/01/2018 18:25

I don't understand the dilemma here either.

It's either a boy, or a girl. Both lovely!

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 18:25

Maybe dilemma was not the best choice of words. I just don't want my husband to be upset when our 20 week scan comes around. He's not a nasty or and angry person or anything obscured like that. I just think he'll be a bit down with the outcome. I know it's a 50/50 chance. And well both be happy with a healthy baby.

OP posts:
StupidMcStupidFace · 25/01/2018 18:25

I don’t understand what you want. Are you saying you’re considering a termination if you discover it’s a girl? Have you spoken to your husband about the fact there’s a 50% chance it could be a girl?

Callamia · 25/01/2018 18:26

It’s not a male thing. Most men aren’t weird.

He’s happy for you? (Not both of you?) I’m not sure if this is just written oddly, or your husband is really odd.

Tell him to wait until you find out. It’s not going to change.

PotteringAlong · 25/01/2018 18:26

Well if you’ll both be happy with a healthy baby then what’s the issue?

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 25/01/2018 18:26

You have a real prize there OP. Stop pandering to him. My friend was relieved to find out her first was a boy as she was concerned how her misogynistic part of a boyfriend would react if the baby were a girl. I felt so sad for her and her future children.

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 25/01/2018 18:27

That should read PRAT!!!

Fekko · 25/01/2018 18:29

Gently remind him that he’s being an idiot and not to say or do anything worth regard to the gender of your baby that will bite him in the backside later.

If he’s like this now, what will he be like the the child is - not good at football, not interested in fishing/dancing, doesn’t do well at school... whatever the ‘prefect package child’ is in his books.

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 25/01/2018 18:30

And it isn't a male husband was over the moon when our first was a girl, so much so he didn't want anymore.

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 18:30

I know we need to wait. (Maybe was a bit oddly wrote looking back now) I just want him to see that anything is a gift.

No definitely not 18th century royalty or anything extravagant like that fekko.

No no abortion that's not a decision we want to take.

I was really seeking some advice as to try and lift his spirits should it be a girl. I'm just worried he will be upset. I know how that sounds.

OP posts:
Thelampshadelady · 25/01/2018 18:31

He really needs to get a grip and be happy he’s hopefully going to have a healthy baby.
I sure as hell know that it’s all I want!

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 25/01/2018 18:32

Who cares if he is upset? If he is upset that his child is a girl his feelings don't matter.

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 18:32

Thanks women of the world. I have taken something positive from this.

Thank you

OP posts:
userabcname · 25/01/2018 18:32

OP your husband is hugely unreasonable if he is going to be 'down' or 'upset' if the outcome of your 20w scan is that you have a healthy baby. Is he aware what that scan is for? And that sometimes people end up having very bad news - not simply that their baby is not their preferred sex?? I think he needs to put things in perspective here - all he should be hoping for is a healthy pregnancy for you and a healthy baby at the end of it. That should be more than enough to make him happy!

NapQueen · 25/01/2018 18:33

You need to stop worrying about how he will feel because you cant do anything about that. He may be overjoyed. He may be sad. Its out of your control. Please dont let this overshaddow the enjoymeny of your pregnancy. Its wasted thought and effort for something that isnt your problem and isnt under your control.

Bubba1357 · 25/01/2018 18:33

Thank you all for your comments. I will speak to him this evening.

OP posts:
BrutusMcDogface · 25/01/2018 18:33

"He's happy for me?" Just for you?

"Must be a male thing?"


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