SouthSea's All American Baby thread

[duchesse]

New thread for well-wishers to leave messages! And for Southsea to leave links to photos of the Pebble (hint hint) [you don't have to Southsea)

It's ironic on our different experiences with breast pumps I found the isis didn't work very well for me and I couldn't get anything out with a manual pump Even more conflicting advice

Hope things are a bit better today.

I don't envy you, Southsea; I couldn't get anywhere with a pump, even without a meddling well-intentioned DH. So no helpful advice from me on this subject!

But keep soldiering on....and let us know if you have managed to untie any of the red tape that's keeping you from home.

Not seen updates for a few days.

I'm angry and frustrated for you Southea with DP throwing away the expressed milk. I can imagine how long it took you to get 2oz.
Keep your chin up....I'm sure it will get easier the more you do it....just practice and the flow will get faster

Did you get anywhere with phone calls today? Hope you get sorted soon.
I'm guessing your family here are eager to get you all home so they can cuddle and spoil little Thomas. I presume you are Skyping all the time.

Gaaaaaah. exH did the same and I could have murdered him. It was expressed so the babysitter could feed DS while we were at a child-free wedding [grrrrr]. So we went home after the church.

southsea - is dh still living???????

Oh my goodness, why can't they think????? . I'm sure you H A D W O R D S

I remember having to pump and throw milk away as i was at the Albert Hall seeing a show. Used the first aid room to express and then poured it straight down the sink. Very galling not to get to use it but i couldn't carry it around all evening.

I also agree with Saggy - the Avent Isis was great for me. If you want to try it when you get home i will more than happily post it to you to try . It is nice also because it is quiet, unlike some of the Medela's

Hope you have got somewhere with phonecalls?

Noooo, I can't believe he would do that!

Actually I can. Because my dh did it too , ah, men, don't you love them.

Persevere with the pump, it's still early days.

When dd was born, I could bf ok but wanted to express so we could go out for more than an hour or so without dd (she bf on demand and she DID demand, every couple of hours!).

It took me ages to get the hang of pumping, at first the best results were with her on one boob and the pump on the other and I'd struggle to get 2oz.

By the time she was six weeks old I could have fed the entire bloody hospital on the milk! I could pump both at the same time and get a full bottle from each. My party trick was to put the pump on one side and hold a bottle under the other, I could fill them BOTH cos once one boob got going the other would follow.

Poor dd had to suck with a huge towel over her to catch the let-down from the other boob.

It eased off when dd was about 3 months old. I lost count of how many bottles I had to pour away. What a shame they didn't take breastmilk donations back then.

Ah, poor DP. He's forgiven, especially as I've since knocked one bottle over into the sink myself! (Didn't tell him that ).

I'm using the Medela symphony, which I think the NCT rents out too. The NICU nurses were adamant I should have a hospital grade pump, it led to lots of chasing around and lots of stress. One was quite bossy about it. But it is worthwhile. I only get about 20 mls out of one breast and anything from 1 - 3 oz out the other. Usually less than 2oz. I don't know if that is normal or low? I think it's gradually improved and I bought some special tea today to try to boost it a bit.

I went to Babies R Us earlier with SIL and spent more money on things I might not need but you never know. I also bought a stroller for the car seat, just a metal frame really but since we're likely to be here for yonks I wanted to get out the house a bit.

We've got an appointment with the immigration Dept in Philadelphia on Friday to plead our case for extending the tourist visa. God knows if it will be the right way to go about it or if we'll even be successful. The Pebble will need to come with us so that was another reason to get the stroller.

The birth certificate fiasco continues. It's so bad it's funny. You simply cannot just ask one person if the paperwork has been received. I spoke to five different people in a row this morning. Each directed me to the next. Eventually I got put back through to the voice message I got when I called the other day. I just hung up. It's crazy!

We had a better night last night ( I did anyway, DP often sleeps through) with Thomas going straight off to sleep after his feeds. He's waking every two to three hours - it's a killer! Must be harder on my 40 year old body though . I try to catch up in the day but find I'm wide awake. It's the morning when I'm most tired and want to hide under the duvet.

Still, I'm loving him more and more every day! I think he's getting a bit bigger too......

New pics please?

Thinking of you. Am at work so can only steal a minute or two... xoxoxox

Good grief, I just can't believe it about the birth certificate. I must live somewhere really efficient in the States then. I think I have lots of milk, but only express 2oz off either side, unless it's first thing. You are doing really well and of course he's getting bigger. I hope the appointment goes well and immigration can help you get the birth certificate sorted for you, as you can't get a passport without one. Good luck!

Aww Southsea..must be so frustrating that things are taking so long to get sorted out.
Hope the appt goes in your favour on Friday....I'm sure under the circumstances they will give a little more time for you to stay there. Maybe try and ask if they can push the paperwork along faster.

Have the doctors said when Thomas is safe to fly back home? Or are you just waiting for paperwork then you can go?

Lack of sleep is annoying isn't it....it will get easier to handle and your body adjusts. Persevere with the BF but don't stress yourself out about it...doesn't work for everyone

Your experience reminds me of trying to get hold of Immigration back in the late 80s. I eventually found a route through the voicemail and spoke to a real person when I got a tip from someone else who had 'been there'. It was a labyrinth.

I would be tempted to go to the nearest state office and speak directly to a person, bring all your own documents, baby Thomas and all his gear...

Or call the hospital and see if the hospital office that registers births and deaths can give you any help, direct phone numbers that bypass the public phone number for instance.

Though it may not be the most enjoyable experience for you , the fact that Thomas is waking and looking for food frequently round the clock is actually a great sign -- and you're going through the worst part now. It gets better and better once you've passed the 10 to 12 lb mark.

Target is a great place to find all sorts of lovely baby paraphernalia and sweet little clothes btw.

Grizzle grizzle grizzle. It's been a night of grizzling. I'm ready to kill someone . DP is aware and hiding behind his laptop.

Poor Thomas, I don't know what's wrong at the moment. He was fine in the day yesterday and then last night he just kept crying and whining. He's still at it.

I tried Infacol, Saline drops in his nosey, and gripe water (not all the same time!) but nothing worked. So didn't sleep until 4am and then awake again before 6. DP was kicked out of bed got up to feed him then went to do some work upstairs (we're in the basement) so I put little man in bed with me and we both slept for a couple of hours. He doesn't feel hot at all. I'm guessing from what everyone has been saying that this is pretty much par for the course! Hopefully tonight will be better.

The Mother's Milk Tea seems to have worked. I woke up with a big wet patch on the front of my jimjam top and have just expressed over 3oz. I'm so proud . That's two feeds sorted for today. I am starting to get into the the timelessness of the day, you know, where I'm not checking the clock or being concerned if I'm not dressed by midday. I've been so used to running on a schedule with working full time for many years. You have to lose that sense of order to some extent and just do what needs to be done as it happens. Now I understand why people say it takes them an hour or two to just get out the door with young babies.

I've been out a couple of times to get essentials. Target is a great shop for getting everything you need in one swoop! I wish I had more time and a bit more independence here but DP's gammy leg means we can't go far. The number of people who have asked if we are going to "the wedding"! They are mad for it over here . I don't know that we'll even be back in time at this rate...

I'll stick some more photos on my profile today. There are some funny ones!

Good morning sweetie!
I feel your pain re days and nights mixed up. It's painful until they figure out that when it's dark, we sleep. Yes, you do have to throw routine out the window, and yes, life does seem like a great big blur for weeks at a time. I have no other advice, I'm sorry... the only thing I'd tell you is to try to get out of the house once a day, even just for a walk around the block. My goals for every day were: a shower every day, no matter when I finally got around to it - even if I showered at noon, that was ok. And I told myself that I would not wear PJs all day (yoga bottoms and a T-shirt were ok though, not sure what the difference is, LOL), and I had to leave the house once every day.
I didn't always manage :o but the goal was important to me.
(((((HUGS)))))

Huzzah for the Mother's Milk Tea! Hang in there with the sleep (lack of sleep). Sleeping with Thomas is a great way to sneak some half sleep. Some mums find you don't sleep with the weather ear alert so much when the baby is close, and actually find yourself relaxing a bit more.

I always slept better with JB in the bed with me .

Sounds lovely & normal if you don't mind me saying so :)

By the way, Infacol can take quite a few doses to actually kick in so persevere if you think he needs it.

Lol re wedding questions!

Sounds normal here too. As another first-timer at 40 I can also relate to the sudden removal of all time references! DS used to wake early, and after feeding, DH would take him and the Moses basket downstairs, leaving me to sleep for an extra couple of hours. It made all the difference and so I found night wake-ups fairly easy. Most of them I'd lie there propped on a huge pillow with baby feeding away, while I was reading one-handed or writing a little diary.
I am now glad I have this record of his early days and also my feelings.

It goes so fast - you've had a rough ride so far; I hope you get chance to enjoy the first weeks!

Sounds normal to me. Slings helped me to keep my hands free in the early days a little, co sleeping rocks, as does baby massage with wind. I found gripe water worked better for my boy but infacol was good with my girl.

You're doing so well, so glad the tea is working

Southsea, don't forget that you were also pushed into a massive routine based environment in the hospital - doctors rounds, meal times, shift changes, lights out etc that i expect it is hitting you harder. Most people have a few weeks of ML where time starts to blur a bit before the bedlam of night time reversal

Sounds like you are doing great though and so pleased that the Mothers Milk tea is working .

FIngers x'd once more for the passport and i agree with asking them to chase up the relevant paperwork/departments for you. However having said that, when i was interrogated about going to do some work in the US (why couldn't a US citizen do it?) and i said i had no intention AT ALL of staying beyond a week, they then got upset as to why i wouldn't want to stay in their wonderful country for longer

Many many congratulations! You and baby are probably the most popular members on MN. So many people rooting for you. Your journey has been epic and will be a story and a half to tell Thomas. Beautiful pics of you both. x

Just to let you know that I'm still here reading your updates. Glad you are all well and progressing through the paperwork (slowly)! xx

Hope all still going ok Southsea and you are making some steps forward into getting home. x

Hi,

It's still so reassuring to read your posts and makes me feel so much better. It's so hard to get up at night but this morning DP did just what you said moonbells and took Thomas upstairs to watch footie (live, bizzarly) while I carried on sleeping. He forgot to feed him mind you but the thought was there . I will ask him to do this again, it made a huge difference to have an extra couple of hours sleep. Little man was up every two hours last night and after the 5am feed was full of mucus and couldn't settle. I tried aspirating him through his little nose but it seemed to be well stuck in there.

Today he has had two washes in the sink. The first he was due, and the second came a couple of hours later after he did a giant poo and was sick on his head (it dribbled out while he was lying on his back). I didn't know which end to deal with first and consequently chose the wrong end, so he ended up with runny poo all over his feet and all over me. Ah, the joys of motherhood!

I'm a bit worried about him this afternoon. He looks a bit yellow. He had jaundice in the hospital but I thought it had cleared up but now he's got that yellow hue about him again and the whites of his eyes area bit off-white. I will probably call the doctor tomorrow. I wonder if I'm not feeding him enough or regularly enough? One of the problems with time flying by is he's not always getting a feed every three hours, and I know that pooing helps to get rid of the terrible 'Billy Rubins' from the body. I think as well he may not be getting enough when I bf. I was giving him a top up afterwards but have stopped that as he seems content enough afterwards.

I need to see the doc anyway because there is a good chance we will get the birth certificate this week! I was finally able to talk to a human bean on Thursday, after DAYS of trying. I spoke to a very friendly man at Vital Records who told me someone who deals with these things would call me back, and she did! She said she could send out a birth certificate the next day but it wouldn't have DP's name on it, although Thomas's surname will be the same as his. She assured me it won't be a problem when we go to get the passport . I just have to have a bit of faith...

So if it does come the travel company will want the paediatrician to give the go ahead for Thomas to fly, and we'll need some evidence that we will be flying in two weeks from the travel company in order to get a passport in a day, which you can do by going to the Philadelphia office. This week is going to be stressful I think! We still don't know for sure that Thomas is insured by Medicaid and need to call the hospital to find out, which I'm scared to do. We need to give the number to the community paediatrician as they have been asking for it. A trip to the paediatrician costs $170 (we got the first bill) and I bought him some medicine for reflux (ranitadine)and that was over $30... He's put on 7oz by the way! He's now 4lb 10oz.

We did venture into Philadelphia on Friday to the Immigration office to enquire about extending our tourist visas. It was Thomas's and my first proper trip out! The staff there made a big fuss of him - I was so proud . But the outcome was a big, fat "No". It can't be done for electronic visas, so if it comes to it we just have to outstay our welcome and hope we can get back into the country at a later date. It's worse for DP because he has to work here sometimes. I'm hoping the discharge summary from the hospital will be enough to pursuade immigration officials at the airport.

So there is suddenly lots going on. We still have to take the British hamper in to the staff at the hopital to say thanks! I'm hoping I can cope this week, my mood is still pretty erratic (tears on Skype on Friday talking to parents). Poor DP is getting it in the neck a lot, but then again, he gets to sleep at night! Oh how I miss my sleep.....

Bizarre, isn't it? You are doing your level best to get out of the country, and they're telling you they won't extend your visa to stay!