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Bereavement

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My 12 week ols nephew died on Friday night....

49 replies

babybuttercup · 24/09/2008 15:59

He was born with a heart condition. He was missing a heart artery, had a hole in the heart and other problems. He had major open heart surgery last Tuesday. He came out of theatre and was doing fantastic for the first 24 hours and then it all just went down hill. Wedneday night his heart stopped and they massaged his heart for 58mins and put him on a ventilator. They had to shock his heart 27 times that night and i can still see his poor body jump. Over the next couple of days his kidneys went on strike, his lungs filled with fluid and his heart was struggling. Myself, my brother, his partner and a family friend all stayed with my nephew day and night, we took it in turns to never let him be alone and to hold his hand and talk to him. We never thought he would leave us, he kept fighting until the end. His pupils became fixed on Friday morning so a CT scan was done in the afternoon. He was brain dead and had already died but the machines were keeping him alive. He was gone. I didn't want to say goodbye but i had to. Before they took all the machines away i told him i was sorry. That mummy, daddy and the rest of the family tried. We done everything we could. I was sorry. When we had all said our peace they asked us to leave whilst they sorted him out. Then his mum and dad held him and had time alone with him. I also held him, he looked so peaceful,i wanted to make him come alive again. I didnt want to let him go.

I have to be strong to support my family but i just had to tell someone else.

Please pray for him i just want him to be in peace.

I post morton is being done Thursday, why cant they just leave him alone, his body has been through enough.

OP posts:
AnAngelWithin · 24/09/2008 16:01

so sorry for your familys loss. thinking of you xx

smugmumofboys · 24/09/2008 16:03

That's really sad. I'm so sorry for your family's loss.

MrsWeasley · 24/09/2008 16:03

so sorry

lizandlulu · 24/09/2008 16:05

such an awful thng to go through

mrsruffallo · 24/09/2008 16:05

So soorry for your loss bbc

FiveGoMadInDorset · 24/09/2008 16:05

What an awful thing to go through but so eloquently wriiten.

mamadiva · 24/09/2008 16:06

I'm so sorry for your loss. Atleast you had that special 12 weeks with him, got to love him and give him as happy a life as you could in the short time he was with you all.

Sympathies to you and your family x

moodlumthehoodlum · 24/09/2008 16:06

I'm so sorry buttercup. I'm sure you will find support on MN.

babybuttercup · 24/09/2008 16:09

He could light up a room with his smile. He was jsut starting to smile, gurgle, become stronger and look around. He was so loved. Life is so unfair

OP posts:
cali · 24/09/2008 16:10

Sorry to hear this, - to survive surgery and do well for the first 24 hours, you think that the hardest part is over, and then something awful like this happens.

I know it is hard to think about a post mortem just now but they can and do, give parents/families answers and this can be helpful for any future pregnancies.
I realise that this will be the last thing on peoples minds at the present time but it may be something for the future.

take care and make sure you can be supported too,

x

babybuttercup · 24/09/2008 16:14

He was in the best childrens hospital in the country. We never thought he would be gone. I'm so proud of him, his poor body just couldn't take any more. He was such a fighter. I just want him back. I cant bare to think of him being alone. He loved to be with people.

OP posts:
ClairePO · 24/09/2008 16:16

I'm very sorry babybuttercup

psychomum5 · 24/09/2008 16:20

much sympathy at this sad time

Kat172 · 24/09/2008 19:03

i am so very sorry for the loss of your darling nepwhew , sending all my love.
xxxxxxx

LIZS · 24/09/2008 19:08

I'm so sorry A relative's dc also had complex open heart surgery at a very young age, his deformity was detected relatively late in pg, but fortunately with a more positive outcome, however I believe it is a very fine line and he was incredibly lucky. Heartbreaking for you all.

heartmummy · 24/09/2008 19:46

im so sorry for your familes loss x x

heartmummy · 24/09/2008 19:46

im so sorry for your familes loss x x

Cocolepew · 24/09/2008 19:47

Sorry for your loss

Dropdeadfred · 24/09/2008 19:49

So sorry that you have to bear this pain.

LilRedWG · 24/09/2008 19:50

I'm so sorry for you loss. I understand that you want to be strong for you family, but please do allow yourself to grieve too.

bubblerock · 24/09/2008 19:51

Awww, bless him, sorry for your loss

Nappyzoneneedssleep · 24/09/2008 19:52

I am so sorry for the loss of your newphew - i have gone and sobbed all over my keyboard

lardybump · 24/09/2008 19:52

so sorry for your loss

gingerninja · 24/09/2008 19:55

What a sad story. Much love to you and his family.

Nemoandthefishes · 24/09/2008 19:55

sorry for your families loss
hope his mummy and daddy are finding strength from those around him
god bless his little soul

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