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Original poster

My friend died I don’t know how - I’m so so sad

55 replies

losssohard · 02/08/2025 23:29

My friend died, she was in her late 40s it’s been around 9 days. I don’t know how, I found out through a mutual friend. Nothing has been said by the family yet I believe. I am devastated. I posted a card through to her husband. I do not expect a reply, I don’t need one.

She was a friend who listened, we didn’t see each other often but we had a strong connection. I can’t describe it - she thought so much of me and I thought so much of her.

I feel so exhausted, I don’t have anyone to grieve with although my DH did know her, we had gone for dinner with her and her husband, we’d been to their wedding, we did talk to them but we never had time to do lots together. I miss her and I feel so bad I haven’t seen her more. Because I don’t know life got busy, I just can’t believe it, I feel so heavy.

I just wanted to say here cos I have no one else to talk to.

OP posts:
ForeverTipsy · 18/08/2025 22:30

CharSiu · 18/08/2025 21:03

I had a lovely friend who died at 41, it was out of the blue from a DVT. I felt very helpless and it affected me deeply. What I did do was visit her Father and stay in touch with him. We had been work colleagues and I had not met him before. He was already a Widower and she had been his only child that’s how I thought I could carry on being a decent friend.

You sound so lovely, I'm so sorry you've been through this too. It's so hard to know what to do to help and support. The crematorium was absolutely packed today - lots of people standing. So I know the family have lots of support and I was a relatively new friend on the periphery. My friend's kindness, love, gratitude and humour really shone through today. Cliché but the family did her proud, and her legacy lives on in her children now.

Original poster
losssohard · 28/08/2025 22:15

Today was the funeral. It was beyond devastating the children were amazing how they spoke about their mummy. I did have a point where I could not keep it together but my DH rubbed my back and that grounded me.

the cause of death is unknown, it’s been deeply traumatic for the family.

i am utterly exhausted.

OP posts:
Treesnbirds · 03/09/2025 22:18

CharSiu · 18/08/2025 21:03

I had a lovely friend who died at 41, it was out of the blue from a DVT. I felt very helpless and it affected me deeply. What I did do was visit her Father and stay in touch with him. We had been work colleagues and I had not met him before. He was already a Widower and she had been his only child that’s how I thought I could carry on being a decent friend.

This is such a lovely thing, I think it’s lovely you have found something positive to do in the aftermath of such tragedy. So sorry for your loss and I would imagine your friend would appreciate your contact with her Dad so much. 💕

Original poster
losssohard · 04/09/2025 06:57

@CharSiuit’s my intention to visit her mum who lives alone. I spoke very briefly to her at the funeral and said I promise to visit.

OP posts:
Original poster
losssohard · 04/09/2025 09:11

Cause of death remains unknown.

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