I miss my dad so much

[Bloom15]

My dad died last Tuesday (a week tomorrow). I feel so bereft and heartbroken. He was the best dad - watched me make up endless dances as child, and a wonderful Gaga to my son. Every day I wake up thinking I won't cry but always do.

I miss him so much

Sorry for your loss op. Grief is so painful. I lost my dad last year and found this comforting at the time

Thank you @KurtShirty - will give this a watch. So sorry for your loss

❤️ I'm so sorry

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's not even been a week - treat yourself gently and give yourself time ♥️

Just a week, please be kind to yourself. My dad died six years ago I still miss him beyond belief.

So sorry

I miss my dad too. Many years ago. Missing them is honouring them.

It's early days. Take care and allow yourself to grieve xxx

Thanks all - some people I know seemed to get over it so quickly but I love him so much. He always allowed me to by myself and supported me. I remember him buying me sanitary pads when I was a teen!

I am so sorry that PPs have been through the same - sorry for your losses

It's my dad's funeral tomorrow and I am dreading it - it feels so final

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad - I lost mine very suddenly two years ago and I still think about him and miss him every day. It does get easier with time but you're still in the very early days, be kind to yourself!

I’m so very sorry for your loss. Grief is a long, long journey but your destination is never your starting place. Over time the intense pain fades only to unexpectedly return. In time we learn to become accustomed to our new situation. One day you will think of your dad and smile, laugh even. I promise. Xx

Thanks both - every day I say I will try not to cry but always do. I am just dreading tomorrow as I know it will be awful.

I hope it went OK today, @Bloom15

Don't worry about crying every day, totally normal! No point trying to rush into feeling better though I know it's tempting. Just be gentle to yourself.

@DaveWatts it was a lively service, the celebrant did a lovely job. And people from his old work came and said such lovely things.

Still crying daily

Lovely not lively!

@Bloom15 I'm so glad it went off OK. The time after the funeral can be really difficult so crying all the time is still totally normal! Try and be gentle to yourself.

Sorry for your loss op, it must be awful to loose a loved parent. It’s ok to cry everyday, I imagine it’s very upsetting and to a degree, life changing.

Time helps to heal and navigate ways in which it still hurts but your coping management gets better, however it will always be sore I imagine.

Thank you both.

Yeah - I've not really heard from friends since the funeral. I suppose life goes on for them

Sorry for your loss OP. Grief is hard. My mum died in early May. The rawness does ease and it does get easier to bear. I'm having a bad day today but I've had lots of good and okay days too.

I'm sorry about your dad. Losing parents is so tough.

Some of them might just be trying to give you space and allow you to come to them. Or they might not appreciate how you're feeling if they've not experienced it yet. It's okay to ask people for what you need.

Also, don't try to stop yourself crying. Crying is a really useful way for your body to release some of the stress of grieving and help you process your feelings. (You might notice that you feel a little calmer for a while after crying because it's released some of your emotions.) Giving yourself a butterfly hug when you cry can also be soothing.

As long as you're taking care of yourself in between crying that's the main thing - stay hydrated, eat well, sleep and rest when you need it. Try to do at least one nice thing for yourself each day, even if it's little like listening to your favourite song.

It won't always hurt as much as it does right now 💐

So sorry for your loss.

That is good to hear. I have been supporting my mum so I think a lot of grief for me is starting really and it is hard

Thanks @gapattachment

I do feel a bit better after a cry - must be cathartic.
I keep talking to my dad and hope he can hear me

So sorry, I lost my Dad 2 months ago. I’m only in my twenties I feel robbed of all the memories I thought I’d have with him still.

Be kind to yourself, you are still in the very very early stages. Just focus on somehow getting through each day.

2 months on and I’m still heartbroken and I feel like the grief hits me in tidal waves instead of the full ache and constantly thinking about him every minute. Not sure what is worse to be honest :(

@Poppyrose22 so sorry for your loss. I am lucky to have had my dad for a longer period of time.

It is my DS' birthday today and it is extra hard today as my dad wouldn't have missed it. It is bittersweet although DS said his Gaga is here as loved him and, apparently, never missed a party

I'm so sorry for your loss @Bloom15 (and for others on this thread who have the same experience). I lost my DF 3.5 years ago during the second lockdown and like your dad he was a really great dad and grandfather and life isn't the same anymore.

The fact your dad was a wonderful father makes his loss more painful now but those happy memories and his positive influence will become a comfort in time. I think now is a difficult time when others not quite so close to your DF have got used to the fact he has died and you are just beginning to contemplate it.

Don't be afraid to ask for support as sometimes people distance themselves because they are not sure how to respond. Some people minimise it meaning to try and comfort you but it is the wrong thing to say to a grieving person. My best friend ignored me completely and has never been in touch since. Some people just can't put themselves in your shoes. You may also be finding people are clumsy in what they say even if they mean well. The cliche that you find out who your friends are is true and often some of the people you least expect are the most helpful.

In time you learn to live alongside your loss. I liken it to a cut; at first it is sore and angry, others can see it, but it starts to heal slowly, occasionally opening up but healing quicker each time. It leaves a scar and that fades over time but never goes. Others don't notice it. You know you've got the scar, it's always there but you live with its mark. It does get better 💐

Thanks @YouOKHun - so sorry for your loss too.

It does seem worse because they are so loved