had 12 week scan today, it had died around 8 weeks, no heartbeat, how long before bleeding starts?

[Gemzooks]

Immediately realised there was no heartbeat and wondered if it was the machine, but the doctor said no, there's no heartbeat, and that it must have died around 8 weeks. It looked fine but the placenta was too small to nourish it, which he said probably meant a chromosomal abnormality. So gutted. Have 15 month DS and this was a bit soon to get pg, but had had an early mc the month before so was happy to be pg again..

Has anyone else had similar and did the bleeding start soon after? There's no way I'm having a D and C, would have to have the medical (prostaglandin) thing instead to expel it..
any advice much appreciated... thanks!

am very sorry to hear this i wouldn't have thought there were any hard and fast rules about when bleeding might be expected to start, i'm sorry. what did they advise you today?

I had a medical miscarriage, as I couldnt deal with waiting for the bleeding to happen natuarally.

It was not a pleasant experiance, although the receover was much quicker. I had a 2.8 year old and a 15 month old at the time and wanted to be able to pick them up etc

Gemzooks, I'm so sorry for your news. Usually the bleeding starts within two to three weeks. If you haven't had any sign within two weeks I'm afraid you do need to have a manual recovery. Sorry.

They should have told you what to expect really. They also should have offered you the medical management in case you didn't want to wait, I'm sure you can ask for that whenever if you don't fancy waiting. Do you have a number for an Early Preg Unit or similar to talk to? So sorry about your loss, I hope it is over for you as soon as possible.

Sorry to hear about your loss .

My dp and I had a scan recently where we there was a sac but no fetal pole. We had had a small amount of bleeding (brown) but within 24 hours, I was bleeding significantly and went on to have a complete miscarriage (my 2nd).

A friend of mine given exact the same prognosis experienced no bleeding and required medical management.

I think it simply is a case of wait and see

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I also had no heartbeat discovered at the 12-week scan and know how terribly shocking it can be.

I had the D&C as I wanted to get over it and move on as soon as possible. I was told it could be weeks and even months before the bleeding started. I have heard from other sources that a significant proportion of people end up having a D&C anyway having tried the medical route, so I hope this is not the case for you.

Take care of yourself and all the best for the future.

Gemzooks - I'm so sorry for both your losses.
My first mc was discovered at the 12 week scan - probably died around 6 weeks, but was hard to tell due to reabsorption.
Its very hard to tell how long it will take, but I was advised that the longer that it had been with no bleeding, the longer it might take. Personally I wasn't prepared to wait for weeks and had an ERPC the next day,

So sorry, gemzooks x

Sorry to hear this Gemzooks. I had the same thing in August 2005. Like the others I opted for ERPC, although because we were away on holiday at the time they asked me to wait a week. As it happened I started to bleed heavily the day after we got home (a BH of course). There was so much blood I went to A&E and was admitted and the op performed the next day. I just wanted it over.

When it happened again in Feb 2006 I had to wait a while for the ERPC because the hospital ward was full.

(Happy ending was I conceived again in June 2006 and had my beautiful DD in March 2007)

thanks everyone.. the doc said to just wait a week, then I could have the medical pill thing. will see how long I can hang on and go for a mammoth jog, and try and feel premenstrual, hoping that now I 'know' my body might start it off..

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your baby. I also found out that I had a missed miscarriage at my 11 week dating scan. The baby had stopped growing around 6 weeks. I opted to go for medical management as I felt I had already waited long enough and nothing had happened yet. It sounds like you are keen to avoid taking the pills. I don't want to alarm you, but it might be helpful to know that know is that losing a pregnancy at 12 weeks is physically completely different to losing a pregnancy early - at least it was for me. I have also miscarried at 6 or 7 weeks. I was 12 weeks when I took the pills. The foetus was tiny but the placental sac had kept on growing and the blood loss was quite shocking. I know everyone is different, but I felt huge relief that the miscarriage actually happened in hospital. I was also offered heavy duty pain killers which I was lucky enough not to have to use. Also, and this is a bit yukky, so sorry, but the nurses were able to check if the foetus had come out. In my case, it didn't completely and had to be helped along. I won't go into details. But I think if they hadn't done this then I might have kept on bleeding.

It's a horrible time for you. It does get better. I was lucky enough to get pregnant fairly quickly afterwards and now have a one year old DS.

Ogh Gemzooks, So soory to hear about this.

I am going through the same thing (ish), I started bleeding at almost 11 weeks, went for a scan at 11+3 and they told me the baby had stopped growing at about 7 weeks.

I was obviously already bleeding by then, but only like a light period.

The sonographer told me that up until 12 weeks your overies provide the hormone telling your body you are pg. After that the placenta is supposed to take over. Of course, in both yours and my case the placenta will not take over. So if you haven't m/c before 12 weeks, then this is about the time you will.

I am still going through this at the moment as I only found out on fri 11th. I started to bleed heavier, but nothing scary.

Like you I couldn't go for the d + c or even have the pills.

I hope that helps. Any more questions just ask. I'm here if you need to talk.

Big Hugs

Pink

Sorry about all the typos, have found that I am so exhuasted, am finding it difficult to focus properly.

hi pink, and sorry you're going through the same thing! You expect it in the early weeks, I m/c at 5 weeks just the month before this pregnancy, but you don't expect it later on.. feel so stupid having to tell everyone..

I feel crampy and premenstrual but no bleeding yet, did 100 sit ups yesterday and will go for a long run tomorrow in the hope of starting it off. If nothing within 2 weeks or so I will probably go for the pill option, although have heard it is very painful. Well I hope we just both have effective miscarriages and go on to conceive soon. I hope you already have a LO to comfort you! let's keep in touch!

i also had a missed miscarriage. it had dies at 7 weeks at my 12 week scan. funnily enough i thought something was wrong as i had had severe cramping all throughout. i kind of knew deep down that it was not going to happen. that afternoon afte the scan i started to bleed. i think once you understand it has died it triggers yuor body to expel it, that is my theory anyway! i wanted the baby so much. luckily i conceived several months after and now have a beautiful baby boy.

neolara- that happened ot me, i heamoraghed and had to go to hospital, the placenta was huge. it was like labour, the intense back pain and nausea.
it may be better to actually have d&c or the pill to be honest now i think about it!

gemzooks, try not to push yourself too hard. You might find you need all your strength to get over this. I'm not trying to be defeatist, but after another day spent in bed coz i'm so shattered, I just cant believe how much this has drained me.

I think the emotional ups and down's plus whats happening physically is really taking it's toll on me.

However, if you can do that many sit-ups your obviously in better shape then I am. You might find you cope fine. I hope you do.

I have 3 LO's keeping me company at the moment. All girls, aged 5,4 and 18 months.

TBH I was a bit scared about how I cope having a 4th. dd3 is so clingy, but still, I would rather be scared about coping knowing that my baby is alright. Then sitting here like this.

Sorry, I guess i'm still all over the place.

I hope you have support around you for when things get going and that it's not too painful. As for me I've had very little pain. I found the worst part was the waiting.

Sending you my love, and remember, try not to push yourself to hard.

take care

pink

Gemzooks, I too had a 12 week scan this Wed and learnt that there was no heartbeat. Baby was the size of an 8 week baby and they said it had either died at 8 weeks, or at 10 and shrunk a bit or at 12 and just had never reached the proper size. I had a D & C yesterday and physically feel absolutely fine today.

I think it died at about 9 cos I was 9 weeks at Christmas and 10 at New Year (as you must have been) and I felt rough at Christmas but have felt fine since New Year. I know why now...

Was not expecting this at all as I have a 4 year old DD and had no probs with her. Feel really gutted - I have lost something which in some ways I never really had. But I have lots of support which I hope you have too. I didn't tell most people until 12 weeks, thinking I'd be fine once I reached that milestone. Had no idea baby could die but could stay inside you without bleeding for so long...

Thinking of you and hope you get sorted physically very soon and without too much hassle or pain. X

oh gemzooks, i am so sorry...

and bluecornflower...

Gemzooks sorry to hear about this - I have been through similar and am sending you best wishes (and hugs if you like hugs - ignore if not)

Bethoo your experience was incredibly similar to mine from what you describe, but it was 8 years ago and with a different dp. I have since gone on to meet a wonderful dh and we have 2 beautiful dds and they have eased the pain massively.

Gemzooks, pinkdolly and cornflower - all such sad stories

Gem - please don't feel silly telling people, this is a legitimate bereavement like any other and you have done nothing wrong, nothing silly. xx

Gemzooks- How are you feeling today? I hope the pain is better and that you are coping alright.

Can your dh take a few days off work so you can have a rest?

Thinking of you.

Pink xx

Hi Gemzooks - just seeing how you are doing.
My first mc was a missed one and I waited the 3 weeks but nothing happened. I opted for an Evac so it was over very quickly without much bleeding after. (1 hour op under GA) Is there a reason you really don't want to go for this option? For me personally I wanted in sorted in a day, not have to wait for the pills to take effect but it is a very individual thing. Also, it is supposedly a good clearout to give you a good base for concieving again. (Which I did the following month, but unfortunately lost naturally in Nov)
Anyway - if you want to ask any questions about it, feel free. I hope you are ok as you can be.