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Original poster

Dad passed away last night

53 replies

mummydoit · 22/11/2007 10:01

Dad lost his five year battle with cancer last night. He's been deteriorating since June and really suffered in the past few weeks. I'm feeling quite calm about it because we've been expecting it and it's a relief that he's not suffering any more and the end was very peaceful. It just seems so hard to believe I'll never see or speak to him again. He was only 65, still young really.

OP posts:
ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 22/11/2007 10:02

(((((Mummydoit))))) I hope you are ok. I'm sure you will be. Thinking of you all xxxx

DrJuliusStrangepork · 22/11/2007 10:03

Thinking of you x

allgonebellyup · 22/11/2007 10:04

oh god

hope you are ok

thoughts are with you

Tiggiwinkle · 22/11/2007 10:05

Very sorry, mummydoit.

frostythesnowmum · 22/11/2007 10:05

I lost my dad 13 years ago and it does get easier your probably in shock right now so be kind to yourself and take everything one step at a time.

65 is young try to think of his life as a full life and not one cut short. My dad was 55 and I found comfort in the fact that I lost a friend at 15 and my dad had a lot longer than that iykwim.

snooks · 22/11/2007 10:06

My thoughts are with you. I hope you find some peace soon and come to terms with your loss xxx Am so sorry.

policywonk · 22/11/2007 10:08

Sorry to hear this mummydoit

onlyjoking9329 · 22/11/2007 10:08

Mummydoit, so sorry to hear this i know he has been struggling for a while and i know you were "expecting" it but i don't think that lessens the shock & pain.
take care.
oj

Original poster
mummydoit · 22/11/2007 10:12

Thanks, everyone. It just seems so unreal at the moment. My parents live 250 miles away so I don't see them on a daily basis and life here is just carrying on as normal. I guess it will hit me more when I go up for the funeral. It will be odd to be at their house and he won't be there. It's hit DH very hard too. He has the same type of cancer and it's hard not to think 'is this how it will be for him?'.

OP posts:
Carmenere · 22/11/2007 10:15

I'm so sorry for you Mummydoit.

Orchide · 22/11/2007 10:20

Mummydoit,
My dad passed away last year , just reading the title of your post made me pause and remember. LAast september in the days following i walked around in a daze, the rest of the world carried on around me whilst i was in pieces.

My dad was a huge part of my life and there remains, now a year later, a huge void where he should be. i still miss him, massively and am sad but i can look back and remember with a smile. that old cliche of time being a great healer, despite being a cliche, is actually very true.
but for me too one of th hardest things is not being able to talk to him, i still even now sometimes go to pick up th phone to call him...then remember.

Original poster
mummydoit · 22/11/2007 11:44

I'm just trying to focus on the fact that he was given six months to live in 2002 so we've had five years more with him than we expected. He lived to give me and my sister away at our weddings, he lived to meet my two children. One sadness is that my DSs might not remember him. They are three and four. My grandad died when I was four and I only have very vague memories of him. It saddens me that my boys won't remember how much their grandad loved them.

OP posts:
ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 22/11/2007 11:46

Thinking of you all xx

LedodgyDickinson · 22/11/2007 11:47

Thinking of you.

bozza · 22/11/2007 11:48

Sorry

Buda · 22/11/2007 11:50

Am so sorry mummydoit.

MNHQ
CarrieMumsnet · 22/11/2007 11:51

Sending love, sympathy and virtual hugs from all at MNHQ

Hassled · 22/11/2007 11:53

I'm so sorry.

TigerFeet · 22/11/2007 11:54

So sorry Mummydoit

Your children may only grow up with vague memories of your Dad, but he will live on in your memories of him and they will know he loved them as I'm sure you will let them know.

Take care of yourself.

eli70 · 22/11/2007 22:00

I feel so much for you. I lost my dad too exactly one month ago because of cancer...it is tough...

DaisyNightingale · 22/11/2007 22:13

again, so sorry for your loss mummydoit. My dad died suddenly two years ago when DS was only three. He talks about his grandad a lot and remembers much more than I thought he would. We try to keep his memory alive as much as possible and he says that grandad is a star in heaven looking out for him. We also scattered his ashes in a favourite family place, and DS asks quite often if we can go to "see" grandad.

I had just got married and had moved away two weeks before he died and remember the numbness and rawness of it all. It was very strange going home for the first few times after the funeral, seeing his empty chair. I remember thinking how odd it was the way my sisters and mum had seemed to adjust better, but they were dealing with that empty chair every day so I suppose they got used to it sooner.

Thinking of you at this time.

daisy xx

Beauregard · 22/11/2007 22:31

So Sorry

jezzemx · 22/11/2007 22:34

Thinking of you x

colditz · 22/11/2007 22:35

Oh I am sorry, 65 is not age really.

dd666 · 22/11/2007 22:41

so sorry
my nan also died (6yrs ago) at young age of 64 from cancer, the sad thing is if her gp had been better trained in cancer her lung cancer would have been found earlier and she would still be alive seeing her great grandaughters!