Our beautiful baby boy

[Cakebaker35]

was born on 21st October and died on 29th October in our arms. I don't know how I will ever feel ok again. I miss him so so much, he was just beautiful. How do you ever learn to live with something like this? Our dd is the only reason for getting out of bed at the moment but I'm worried our sadness will take its toll on her but I just can't be 'normal'. I feel so so empty.

[Didactylos]

op, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful baby boy

[theclockticksslowly]

So so very sorry for your loss. x

[ashtrayheart]

I'm so sorry cakebaker, rest in peace little William x

[MyGhostIsFlummoxed]

So sorry cakebaker. I'm sure William knew he was loved deeply. I don't know if you will ever fill the hole that his passing has left, but hopefully you will learn to live with it.

[BettyFriedansLoveChild]

Cake, thank you for sharing William's story with us. I will be thinking of you for the funeral tomorrow. We also chose to send our DC1 to preschool on the day of DC2's funeral, and for us it was the right decision - we needed to focus all our attention on DC2 on that day. We gained a lot of peace from the funeral, but also found it exhausting. Wishing you strength for tomorrow x

[Ellisisland]

Wishing you lots of strength for the funeral Cake xx

[KoalaDownUnder]

Oh, life is so cruel sometimes. I can't tell you how sorry I am about your beautiful baby boy.

[SilverShins]

Cake for you and your family. Just so very sad for you. William will live on in the hearts of everyone you are close to xxxx

[ipswichwitch]

I'm so sorry this has happened
DS1's twin brother was born sleeping 3 years ago - DS1 is now a happy, bouncy 3yo. I still miss him terribly, and it took me some time before I felt anywhere near normal again. Life did however, start getting easier - I had some counselling during which I said things I could never bring myself to tell anyone else. It helped.

I know what you mean about dreading today but needing it to be done. I felt the same way, it's all very surreal.

For us, life goes on. We have another wonderful DS and are able to enjoy life with them - something I never thought I'd be able to do. I will always have a special place in my heart for our beautiful A though.

Massive (((hugs))) for you and your beautiful William.

[ChippingInAutumnLover]

Your post about William was lovely, and heartbreaking. I hope today went as well as it could have. Lots of love & strength to you all xx

[FavaBeanPyramidScheme]

[AcrossthePond55]

Bless you cake and bless your little William. Of course he knows how much he was loved. Your arms and your words told him how much.

I wish you peace, strength, and love.

[TwuntingCrow]

Wishing you strength and peace x
So sorry for your loss of baby William
X

[fedupofrainydays]

Oh cake my lovely. I was just thinking about you today and checked back on the old thread to find you and can say I'm absolutely devastated to see your news. im crying as I read your story - it's just every mothers worst nightmare. I also know what you went through on the ttc and also MC threads after losing the twins. I can not even begin to imagine your pain. No words of mine will help but I'm thinking of you and saying prayers for you, your DH and DD and of course little William.

[CatWitch]

Cake baker, I wish I could gather you into a huge hug. I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sweet son. Words cannot begin to soothe the hurt you must be feeling but please know many of us here are holding you and your family in our hearts. Your lovely boy will be in our thoughts...xxoo

[Tranquilitybaby]

cakebaker no words are enough but I just wanted you to know i'm think of you. All your little boy knew was love in his all too short life x

[Cakebaker35]

Thank you all for your kindness, it really is appreciated. We managed to get through the funeral on Monday, the sun shined, it was a short but very personal service and we were surrounded by family and friends. The love and support we've experienced has been overwhelming and gies to show during the darkest days all you can do us cling to one another and hope for brighter ones ahead. The days range from utter heartbreak to feeling numb and almost as if it's a slightly out of body experience. We've seen a psychologist who is attached to the neonatal unit and so far have found it very helpful to have someone to just talk to and that brings some independent insight into coping with loss. It's a very very long and frightening road ahead but we are taking it one day at a time and I think that's all we can do for now. X

[PacificDogwood]

I am glad the sun shone for William and that you found yourself surrounded by love and support.

Strength and light sent your way for the road ahead

[LittleBairn]

Cake I'm so sorry about Williams passing.

I lost my daughter at an earlier stage so not quite the same expereince but I recognise some of the feelings.
One day at a time is defintely the best way to go, for me I found breaking the day down I to chunks and focusing on something during each part even if it was just cleaning the kitchen. It helped me not get overwhelmed by the huge expanse of time ahead without DD.

[Cakebaker35]

Shone not shined! Can't even use language properly it seems! Thank you again, and I'm so sorry for your loss too little. Good advice about taking the day in chunks, I will try to remember that xx

[ZingOfSeven]

I'm so sorry for your loss and the unimaginable pain you are going through missing beautiful baby William.

[MiddletonPink]

An hour at a time
Don't expect too much of yourselves in the early days.
Take all the help that is offered.
Talk, talk and talk about William and what has happened.
It's one step forward then twenty back so try to remember that.
The pain your are in right now will lessen very gradually but your love for William will grow stronger every day and you will never lose that.

[Travelledtheworld]

My baby son died when he was 3 weeks old. I cried every day for 3 months. The first year was terribly hard but you to learn to live with the loss.
Be kind to yourself and his Daddy too. Things will,get better eventually.

[Annaelisabeth]

Hi Cakebaker, I'm so sorry for your loss. I haven't read through this entire thread but I can very much relate to what you are feeling. Me and my husband lost our son due to Placental Abruption at 40 weeks in August. The pain and sorrow we are now going through cannot be described in words. The only thing that has kept me going these past few months is our daughter who is 2,5. How are you feeling now? Lots of love, a.

[needinganswers]

Cakebaker35, I am so sorry for you and your families loss. It's such a hard thing to go through, I lost my son Cody, he was born at 25 weeks and managed to live 2 whole days. My partner at the time was not so supportive and visited once before I gave birth and when I gave birth he was too busy at work. He never got to meet his son so it's his loss! it has been 3 years since Cody went with the Angels but I know he's looking down on me and taking care of my family. You will never get over the loss of your baby, you just learn to cope with it, my parents never knew I was pregnant either as I was young so moved in with a friend to hide it, I was pretty much on my own. You have your family there by your side, you are truly blessed and you know your son is safe up there, he was too good for this world!
Take care x