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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

if you have a 7 year old....tell me their worst, recent behaviour!

73 replies

sleepingsowell · 03/05/2010 22:05

I have a DS who is 8 very soon. He has for the first time ever been really 'challenging' at home recently. I have never felt before that I couldn't deal with him, but lately....it's just rudeness, etc but it's out of character

I would love to know if this is something 'normal', could anyone post examples of their 7 or 8 year old's 'worst'?

I really don't know whether to be worried or not! Or whether this is something more usual.

TIA

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

stealthsquiggle · 04/05/2010 09:49

SoMuchToBits - we have had the "no-one likes me, no-one will play with me" (translation: no-one would, on this particular day, put up with me dictating the game and the (endless) rules yet again) and he seems to have come out of that one somewhat - only to go straight into Mr Angry/Paranoid/Martyred.

If anyone is looking for me I will the one in a dark corner with Gin and Chocolate, muttering over and over "it's a phase, it's a phase"

Francagoestohollywood · 04/05/2010 09:53

@ having a massive toddler with me... It feels the same here too... It looks as if ds is having the tantrums he's never had as a toddler...

He also pretends to run away from home. The other day he got out of our flat in his pj

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 09:54

Yes, stealth, there were days when ds rather resembled Bossy Ross (the Playmobil lifeboat coxswain who goes round with a megaphone bossing everyone around). Of course he didn't see it that way - it was just unfair of all his friends not to play his games with his rules, as obviously his ideas were much better than theirs!

He does seem to have calmed down a bit this year though, and not be as bossy (although he still gets very excited about all the ideas he has and can't quite understand if his friends don't share his excitement).

Francagoestohollywood · 04/05/2010 09:55

Yes. I'm looking forwards to the latency years

kormachameleon · 04/05/2010 09:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

stealthsquiggle · 04/05/2010 09:58

SoMuch - I would say that we should get our DS's together - but unless they happened to share an obsession brilliant idea (building a robotic dragon that he can fly on, complete with business plan ?) then they would just find each other intensely annoying and not see the similarity at all

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 09:59

Lol @ Mr.Angry

I will remember this thread next time he starts up with the drama and outrage, which will no doubt be at 3.45 this afternoon when he gets home from school, if not before...

oh got ABit, and the SMELLS start at 12...at least our little boys are not smelly yet!

I have heard from a friend that her ds now aged 18 just stopped talking, grunted and disappeared into (filthy) room from age 13. I have to say that sounds like a blessing compared to the current overgrown toddler drama.

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 10:03

steath and Somuch, shall we have a ds summit?

They can fight for dominance of the known universe and maybe we can get a bit of peace. (unlikely I know)

Ds1 even has to dominate playground games with children he has never met. He climbs to the top of the frame and starts shouting ' right, this is my pirate ship that I bought on the internet! You are the oarsmen! I am going to look out for sea monsters and Romans! ROW!!'

He is then rather surprised by lack of conformity. Recently had a mother say to me 'future headmaster you've got there' :S

unlike some of your sons he's pretty much always been like this but the sheer verbal onslaught has been a lot worse recently.

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 10:05

Actually the robotic dragon with business plan sounds quite good - ds likes designing and building things! He might go for that! Does your ds like Playmobil a lot? If so they might get on.

Ds likes Playmobil, Lego, playing cricket,singing and music, lifeboats, aeroplanes, fire engines, trains, drawing (especially designs for things) and cars.

Most of his friends are into football, Nintendo ds games, Pokemon etc. He does have one friend who likes Palymobil and Lego though, and last year he got to know some friends who like cricket, at the cricket club. This really helped him to settle down I think - having friends with similar interests.

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 10:06

somuch, my ds is lego obsessed (though prefers his PSP) and builds massive battle robots at great speed....

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 10:08

Lol, allegra, my ds will often have ideas for games and can be heard saying to his friends "So A, you can do this and J you can do that and V you'll have to do the other". How not to win friends..... The trouble is, he is convinced that his ideas are so wonderful everyone will want to go along with them. And they are usually quite interesting and inventive - but not what all the other kids want to do!

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 10:09

Mine usually makes specially adapted lifeboats/rescue vehicles with his Lego!

BigBadMummy · 04/05/2010 10:15

I had a 7 year old who decided to take a screwdriver and draw a nice swirly pattern all over the bonnet of my dad's beautiful Mercedes. "Because I thought it would look cool".

That same 7 year old is now a 14 year old who is top of his class in various subjects. And an active member of various debating groups at school.

As other people have said, children push the boundaries. "I know mum has said no eight times but if I ask a ninth time she might say yes".

Stand your ground and be consistent with your views.

And if there is talk of "nobody likes me" about school, have a word with his teacher? Or maybe go up there at lunchtime and see if you can see them all in the playground?

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 10:16

hehe they are still so cute (at times) at this age despite being power-mad.

I reckon if we got them together it would be like a mini Tony Blair, Jeffrey Archer and Alan Sugar trying to play pretend games.....

ds1 actually seems to end up playing a lot with girls and younger boys who will accept his imperialism....

stealthsquiggle · 04/05/2010 10:17

DS thinks he likes sports, but currently spends so much time worrying about the rules and whether everyone is playing to them that he doesn't actually play much . DH was hugely relieved when he took him to a professional rugby match that DS went from "Daddy, is he allowed to do that?" to "HIT HIM!" within one half

DS has loads of Playmobil, and loves it but doesn't play all that much any more (largely for lack of anyone to play with). He loves drawing (annotated designs for things), playing piano, golf and wants to watch TV a lot of the time right now . When he emerges from his grump he loves all things science-related and is absolutely determined to be a research scientist/entrepreneur.

Allegra - I love "this is my pirate ship that I bought on the internet" I think the battle for world domination might be quite an amusing spectator sport.

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 10:24

Lol stealth, my ds does lots of annotated designs too - perhaps we should get them together as a design team! Ds also does the thing about making sure everyone does stuff by the rules in cricket - at his school some of them play cricket on the field at breaktimes, but ds tries to make them do it all properly when most of them just want to swish the ball around and don't care! That's why joining the cricket club was such a success as they all have to follow the rules there .

Ds plays on his own with his Playmobil a lot - he gets ideas from real life things he sees or from the television. E.g. at the weekend there was a local fun run, and the police were out marshalling it. The next day ds set up a Playmobil fun run, complete with police, paramedics etc.

What programmes does your ds like on television?

stealthsquiggle · 04/05/2010 10:32

Put it this way - Professor Brian Cox is DS's hero

lilmissmummy · 04/05/2010 10:35

When my DS hit 8 was convinced someone had swopped him, he went from an easy going gentle sensitive little boy to a growling, whinging, complaining child.

If he didnt get his own way he would burst into tears even in the school playground or at friends houses. He refused to go to school clubs and gave up all his after school activities at Rugby he threw himself on the ground in hysterics because he decided that he didnt want to go (we werent forcing him, he was fine on the way there!) And OMG the talking he talks about rubbish (a computer game or a boy at school or a dream he had etc.) constantly all day without taking a breath. He rubbed me up the wrong way and I started to wonder if it was me and I was being over sensitive.

Then he hit 9 and my loving, sweet boy came back, he still has his moments but we can do things again together and he wants to try new things and go to his friends houses.

There is light at the end of the tunnel!

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 10:40

Ds likes the following:-

Any cricket, Mythbusters, Air Crash Investigation, Traffic Cops, Smash Lab, Scrapheap Challenge, Top Gear, How do they do it? and some odd programme about railways he was watching the other day. Oh, and odd programmes about things like space launches, how aeroplanes are made etc......

Lilmiss, sound like your ds is the same as all the others on this thread!

Original poster

sleepingsowell · 04/05/2010 10:55

wow - this thread has got bigger since I was on last night!

D'you know, I feel a bit over-emotional myself ladies - I love you all and feel you are all my sisters in suffering

This is so, so helpful and I'm saving this thread to re-read

And am still laughing at 'ruining my childhood'! I think that sums up the problem in a way; these are like toddler tantrums in their complete lack of any logic, but now they are much more articulate and can speak in these terms instead of just crying till they throw up

Seriously, I love this thread!

OP posts:

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 11:01

think your ds is a lot more technical than mine SoMuch- mine is Dr. Who and internet geek. Hence 'my pirate ship that I bought on the internet- it was part of a Lego Wishlist that the little monster sent TO ME having got on my laptop with the guest login!!

I received an email saying 'your friend ds1 would like you to see the following list' - costing a total of £300 odd.

I was so impressed at the cheek I bought him something off it actually- some elaborate transforming robot thing as usual.

Francagoestohollywood · 04/05/2010 11:06

Gosh your dc do sound like soooo much more sophisticated than my ds, who at the moment is only interested in playing football (and throwing toddlers tantrums)

SoMuchToBits · 04/05/2010 11:10

Ah, but Franca sometimes I wish ds was just into football etc - then he would probably have heaps of friends who were all also into football. Although actually I don't like football myself and I love him somuchtobits even when he is being a Bossy Ross and complaining he has no friends!

allegrageller · 04/05/2010 11:15

yeah I think life's a bit harder for the nerds who are not into football, especially if they have dominating personalities!

I expect they will have Nerd Revenge later on- when they learn to build own robotic dragons/ hack into the Pentagon etc

Francagoestohollywood · 04/05/2010 11:16

Awwwww .
I loathe football too, so boring and ethically wrong with all that money involved. At least I found this football practice where they teach them fair play, respect for other teams etc etc. As when he plays with his friends at the park they seem to waste lots of time arguing over the rules

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