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How the hell do you get a 3 yo to give up her dummy??

39 replies

rickman · 16/07/2005 14:17

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Nbg · 16/07/2005 14:18

Buy a toy horse.

Yorkiegirl · 16/07/2005 14:18

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GetOrlaithOut · 16/07/2005 14:27

Does she have it all day or just for sleeping? If it's just for sleeping, I'd say leave her with it.

In the day, hmm, I don't know - could you use a timer to say she can have half an hour at certain times in the day and then reduce it over time?

rickman · 16/07/2005 14:29

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JOSIE3 · 16/07/2005 14:36

How about using a timer chart?
Make a chart divided into half hour slots for the whole time shes awake, take her shopping for special stickers and then explain that for every half hour she remains "dummy free" she can have a aticker. You can then further reward her with a treat at the end of the day depending on how many stickers she has - if you felt it was appropriate.

In my experience it would be easier for you in the long run if she goes "cold turkey". No more dummies during the day or night - otherwise you are just going to have to do it all again at night.

I've done this one myself!! Good luck

KBear · 16/07/2005 15:11

Is she at nursery yet? Could you use the "none of the big girls at the nursery have dummies, they gave them to the babies" line? My DD adored her dummies and had one in her mouth and one in each hand until she was 3.5! Luckily for us, she got a hair on it once, gagged, was sick and then I said "aaah, that's because you're too big for it now, it's made you sick". Worked like a charm! Good luck with it.

pippi123 · 16/07/2005 20:40

dummy fairy worked for us - she only got a packet of milky bar stars though!! More interested in little glittery footsteps that we put down near window where she threw dummy. (We had to be quite well synchronised)
She shouted it really is magic - it was lovely really. Then whenever she asked for dummy we reminded her about the fairy and she never really bothered again.
I didn't think she would ever give it up so don't despair!!!

expatinscotland · 16/07/2005 20:41

Soak them in white vinegar. Let them air dry.

Then give her it when she asks. When she asks why it tastes so badly, tell her dummy starts to taste badly when you get too old to have one.

geogteach · 16/07/2005 21:05

We told DS1 the cleaner had thrown it in the bin (it was her last day, so she didn't know anything about it)worked a dream!
DH's cousins (in Spain) were taken to the top of their appartment block and threw them to the dogs?!

wysiwyg · 16/07/2005 21:12

Oh god..... just trying to get my 5 year old to give up hers!!!!!!!!!! She has two - have just got her down to one.
With DS I will be taking it away when he is 1, before he has any say in the matter.

(Still better than thumb sucking though IMO)

Toothache · 16/07/2005 21:16

Riskman - I need to start a "How to get a 4 yr old to give up a dummy" thread!

It was made worse when dd came along coz he can't understand why she can have one but he can't. I'm going to watch the advice ehre very closely.

Toothache · 16/07/2005 21:16

Riskman??????

expatkat · 16/07/2005 21:32

This is a good time to get rid of it, and your biggest obstaclebelieve it or notis your own fear. I've done this twice (alas): Ds at 3, and dd at 2.5. Is there not something a bit more affordable that your dd wants ? I found that both kids got such pride from chucking their dummies into the bin. I praised them again & again, suggesting that we tell everyone: grannies, grandpas, teachers, aunties, uncles, etc. The present, thus, became secondary in importance--which pleased me, so I didn't feel it was all about bribery.

LookI won't lie. The first 2 nights are difficult (which is pretty standard, evidently) but soon their sense of identity shifts and they don't even see themselves as a child who needs/desires a dummy. They get a bit been-there-done-thatdummies are for babies.

I do think, though, it would be helpful first to limit dummies to nightime only (be committed about it; hide dummies in high places, for example, so none can be found during the day). It will go more easily that way.

KiwiKate · 17/07/2005 08:41

I agree with EIS about the vinager idea. She won't want it if it tastes horrid.

My MIL "lost" my SIL's dummy. SIL apparently spent a few days mooning around looking for the lost dummy, and then forgot about it.

LOL at "throwing the dummy to the dogs!" FANTASTIC IDEA.

bigdonna · 18/07/2005 13:57

my nieces gave their dummys to the birthday fairies,in exchange for a present.Have you read the Noo Noo tree,its about a monster who will not gave up his dummy.

bigdonna · 18/07/2005 14:23

sorry the book is called the last noo noo by jill murphy ,i must have read this book at least 50 times.

bambi06 · 18/07/2005 14:28

o.k and how do you get them to stop sucking their thumbs.! my dd of 4yrs old knows its time but i feel awful when she`s sobbing in bed because she cant suck her thumb, we put a plaster onit and then she took it off after sobbing for ages .plus i know how good it tastes as i sucked mine until i was 11!!! so i can truly sympathise but i dont want her to damage her teeth. what can i do?

NannyL · 23/07/2005 01:02

when a child is 3 and YOU dont want them to have something YOU dont give it to them....

yes tyhey will whinge and whine for a few days, maybe even a week, but once they realise you ARE seriuse about it and you WONT give in it WILL stop.

You just have to decide 'no more dummy' and MEAN no more dummy (in your head) and then get rid of dummy....

And think of in 1 weeks time it wont be as bad as today!

things like dummy fairy, / exchnaging dunny for a new toy at toy shop etc will rpobably help as well!

godd luck!

beep · 23/07/2005 08:12

my 11 year old dd was just talking the other day about when she gave up her beloved dummy, I think she was 3 at the time and I told her that a friends baby needed them so she let me give them to him. I confessed last week that I had really thrown them in the bin, i hadn't realised she still believed we'd given them away!With ds2 we went to a shop and bought him a cuddly toy and swopped the dummies for it(need a helpful shop assistant!).As everyone says the first 2 nights are the worst. good luck.

GillLevey · 24/07/2005 09:38

My sister told my nephew that they needed all his dummies so they could be melted down to make the fire engine he wanted for his birthday. He never asked for it again.

helsi · 24/07/2005 09:48

Thats a good idea Gill.

We have never had that problem as dd doesn't have a dummy. Sje sucks her thumb instead now thats a challenge!

girrafey · 24/07/2005 11:22

my mumcamein when i was 3.5 in the middel of the night on xmas ve and told me father christmas was confused he thought i was a big girl but i had a dummy like a baby. so unless i gave hime my dummy i was going to have tohave baby presents of nappies and bottles. i apparently spat it out and went back to sleep. i had the presents next day to distarct me, i asked for it that night and mum said i can call father christmas if you want and get it back but he will take your new big girl toys away. i never asked for it again. i guess it would work over xmas, birthday and maybe easter? hth

girrafey · 24/07/2005 11:23

so sorry for bad typing, feeding dd. sorry x

mishmash · 24/07/2005 11:30

We got out of the dummy thing very easily - DH was ill and his boss came to visit - DD had her dummy in and his boss just went over and jokingly took it out of her mouth and told her it was dirty and he was taking it home to put it in his bin - I encouraged him to keep going and that was it. She never asked for or missed it. But I guess that we were just lucky that the end of it came so easily.

Good luck Rickman!

alison222 · 24/07/2005 11:32

Don't buy new ones. Let the old ones decay to the point they have holes and don't such then they don't work properly.
Ds was told by the dentist that they were pulling his teeth out of shape and he wouldn't be able to eat his food properly if he din't stop. He came home and threw them in the bin and never looked back.