Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Original poster

Toddler 'playing with himself'

31 replies

MrDrool · 08/01/2010 18:56

Hi.

DS is 14 months old and has a tendency to play with himself every opportunity he gets. Literally every time his nappy is off (nappy changes, baths etc) he is constantly playing with himself.

All jokes about boys and their toys aside - is this common?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
MadameMoe · 08/01/2010 18:57

Normal, normal, normal

Batteryhuman · 08/01/2010 18:57

Absolutely normal. Please ignore or distract until he is old enough for you to explain that this is not something boys do in public!

clayre · 08/01/2010 18:58

its the start of a long and happy friendship, if you draw attention to it they do it more!

Bleatblurt · 08/01/2010 18:58

They don't stop btw. My 5 year old had a sore willy, a few days ago, from all the fiddling.

SolidGoldBloodyJanuaryUrgh · 08/01/2010 19:01

Yup, nothing wrong with it at all. Ignore it at home, gently distract in public and when he gets older, gently remind him that it's fine to do that in private but not in Sainsburys or in front of MIL.
(I had to add an additional note to the instructions I gave my DS, about being allowed to fiddle at home BUT NOT WHEN THERE@S VISITORS after a friend of his dad's got an unexpected eyeful.)

Batteryhuman · 08/01/2010 19:03

And girls are fiddlers too

Original poster
MrDrool · 08/01/2010 19:26

Wow - thanks for all the speedy feedback. None of the books I read mentioned any of this so your advice is greatly appreciated.

I'll take charge of talking to DS when the time is right. DW can take care of any DDs that come along...

OP posts:
TheDevilWearsPrimark · 08/01/2010 19:28

Normal!

Though I'll never forget the look of horror on my teen sisters face when she was changing DS and he did it. haha

Feelingsensitive · 08/01/2010 20:42

My DD is 4 and still does this! Normal. I have taught her over time that she can touch herself in as its her body but she must do so in private.

PurpleLostPrincess · 08/01/2010 21:17

I echo the 'normal' comments - I was always telling DS to leave his willy alone, obviously moreso if we were in company!

Now he's 15, I sometimes catch him 'holding' on to it - he says he is warming his hands up lol! This is in the company of his girlfriend by the way . I tell him there's a time and a place for everything and I'd rather not witness the time he spends with his special friend lol! He was circumcised six months ago so maybe he's just trying to be reassuring pmsl

PurpleLostPrincess · 08/01/2010 21:23

When I say I was always telling him to leave his willy alone, I did have to be careful not to draw attention to it or he'd just do it more. Also agree that children should know that they can touch their own bodies, as long as it's in private - it's just part of growing up and learning the do's and don'ts of society...

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 21:25

My 2 sons just do it absentmindedly while they're watching the telly. They're now 3 and 6 and before I was a mum I knew that boys tended to fiddle with their willies from a young age but I had no IDEA they could get erections from a tiny age too. I was very shocked the first time I noticed THAT, I can tell you!

DS2 is terrible some mornings when he's first woken up - sits on the sofa watching telly and it's only when I stand him up to get his undies on that I look and think OMG!!!! That could have somebody's eye out! LOL Thank god for this cold weather I say.

At least I know it's all in good working order, but jeez, I wish the books would tell you these things!

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 21:26

Oh yeah, and they especially like to do it when they're not feeling well, I've noticed. Must be a comfort thing or something I suppose.

madmissy · 08/01/2010 21:30

oh no i have just had a ds and im such a prude!
im now scared for when the moment comes

Wigglesworth · 08/01/2010 21:38

My friends DS used to get her make up brush out and stroked his willy with proclaiming "it tickles". She didn't feel she could use it after that incident.

nannynobnobs · 08/01/2010 21:51

my DD2 was just fresh out of the bath earlier and sat, legs flopped open, having a poke about whilst watching Tom and Jerry she is 3 and honestly it's just from reading threads on here that I just said 'gently!' and left her to it! Otherwise I may well have made some big thing of it. I don't remember DD1 doing it at all. Gawd bless MN

lambanana · 08/01/2010 22:00

My Ds used to do it a lot and I have got 2 dd's 3 and 2 who both have a fiddle sporadically.

No biggie really

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 22:13

Madmissy, you'd better get practising your "I'm acting un-horrified but inside I'm dying" type of comments and faces!

madmissy · 08/01/2010 22:27

i have 2 dds so a changing ds nappy is all new experience let alone putting in a 1st erection

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 22:30

See, I wouldn't know what to do with all the crevices on a little girl - must be a nightmare to clean their bum when it's an up-their-back runny poo. Too many nooks and crannies - at least with a boy you can see where you're cleaning!

DollyMessiter · 08/01/2010 22:32

If it feels good, humans will feel it.

Completely normal and natural.

fruitstick · 08/01/2010 22:32

curly - I had exactly same reaction as you. DS1 went through stage when he was about 2 of watching tv with his hands down his pants. DH said we all would if we had the chance.

I was equally horrified when reading Raising Boys that 14 year olds masturbate at least once a day .

madmissy · 08/01/2010 22:35

have to say that ds is much quicker to change than the girls ever were!

fruitstick; i read that behind my hands

phew

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 22:36

Re: boys and their beloved willy - it IS quite amusing when they can talk and start saying in a giggly way "Tee hee, look at my willy, it's gone all big!"

We're having to stifle a laugh now when our two have a bath together. The youngest might brush his foot against his brother's willy area by accident, and then I catch the eldest encouraging him "Curlyboy, Curlyboy, do it again - that tickles, it's nice!" "Tee hee" says the little one "Do it to me!"

What on earth do you say go that?!?!? We've just been saying "Don't go near each other's private parts, boys - it's not for anyone else to touch them, just yourself. In private."

Is that about right?

CurlyhairedAssassin · 08/01/2010 22:40

Fruitstick!! I am not looking forward to even entering my teenage boys' probably fetid bedroom - never mind discovering sticky tissues and sheets on the bed!!!

How often do wet dreams happen anyway? I have visions of the washing machine being on every morning! Or do they not have many because er, they've already done the job themselves when they've been awake, into a tissue. [big prude]