Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Will people judge me for having a 5 year old in a push chair ?

50 replies

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 19:29

Hi, my daughter will be 5 in march and is very tall for her age.
She also has some SEN's. I need to go christmas shopping in the city soon, but she hates shopping. She runs off in shops, and is generally a pain in the arse.
I was thinking of taking a push chair, if we can find one that still fits her. That way, she can relax and look at some books or have a sleep while I shop in peace. I did this a year ago and an old woman said to me "She's too big for a pushchair, no wonder children these days are lazy". I must admit, I feel that people do look at her funny, if she's in a push chair. She is in age 6-7 clothes, although she does have a baby face.
I think it wold be the easiest option, but don't want to feel judged.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

shinyshoes · 13/12/2009 19:32

can someone look after her for a couple of hours while you shop instead.

Why do you care what others think? if it works for you do it. Do worry what the judgeys think. Say something witty if people stare or pass comment

Doodlez · 13/12/2009 19:32

It only matters if you give a flying toss what anyone else thinks.

If it were me and since I don't give a crappola what anyone else thinks because they don't live my life, I'd take the push chair and be chuffed to bits I'd found a good solution to a tricky problem.

MavisEnderby · 13/12/2009 19:34

Nah,I wouldn't judge you but then I have a sn dd age 4 who is also quite tall.

She can walk short distances but tires.

(Luckily she has a wheelchair for distances so people are less judgey judgey.)

I would ignore any batty old nosey people and go for it.

Your child your decision and it isd no business of theirs

jobhuntersrus · 13/12/2009 19:35

Best solution would be to find someone to look after her so you can zip round on your own. However if that isn't an option for whatever reason then ignore the looks and just get on with it. Will she fit though? Be heavy to push?

mistletoeandjuan · 13/12/2009 19:36

Do what you need to do and try not to worry about what other people think. It's nothing to do with them.

You'd probably worry that people were judging you if she was running off - at least this way you'll both be relaxed and enjoy it.

I must admit that I automatically get a bit judgy if I see an older child in a buggy but I make myself consider the reasons why and even if I can't see any obvious reason I remind myself that it's none of my business anyway - walk a mile in another mans shoes and all that...

Happyneverafter · 13/12/2009 19:37

Why don't you judge these idiots for being such tossers. You need to develop a thick skin as there are endless moments of parenthood when people judge you rather than minding their Ps and Qs as my mum used to say. No idea what Ps and Qs stands for.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 19:38

We do live a lond way from the city, so we would be gon all day. I can't let her Grandma have her all day, as I don't think it's fair. She tends to mess herself more when we're not there too.
I know I shouldn't care what people think, but I'm one of those who does. Since that old woman said that to me, it's made me more aware of what others think.

OP posts:

stillenacht · 13/12/2009 19:38

Major McClaren
Tell them she has SN
Hold your held up high and be proud of yourself and your daughter.

You go girl!

Thats what I do!

corriefan · 13/12/2009 19:38

I think some people probably will I'm afraid, but sod what they think! Don't let what some stranger may or may not think change what works best for you and your dd, they don't matter. But if you are prepared some idiot might something at least you can be ready to have a well-phrased retort to shut them up! Another thing is you sometimes see older kids in bigger special push chairs but I reckon they'd probably be really expensive.

stillenacht · 13/12/2009 19:39

My DS is 6 and a half and goes in his McClaren all the time - I don't care what people think- usually he squals at them so loudly they run away lol!

sarah293 · 13/12/2009 19:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

skidoodle · 13/12/2009 19:41

Some people will judge you. I've had to point out to a few people I know that you can't assume that an older child in a pushchair is lazy or their parents can't be bothered to get them to walk.

The advice to ignore people is right, but it's not necessarily easy, especially as that particular judginess gets an extra shrillness from the childhood obesity hoo ha.

stillenacht · 13/12/2009 19:41

squeal i meant to say

PlonkerTeatowelOnTheirHeads · 13/12/2009 19:43

People will judge. I think that's inevitable.

Just be ready with a sharp retort and then turn your back and walk away.

At the end of the day, it's fuck all to do with anyone else what you do.

MollieO · 13/12/2009 19:46

I thought she had speech delay rather than a physical disability. I think you would struggle to find an ordinary pushchair large enough for a 5 yr old that is the size of a 6 or 7 yr old.

If she doesn't have a physical disability and you are intending to do it for your own convenience then I think you will be making a rod for your own back. I would take her shopping with a wrist strap that would stop her running off or leave her at home whilst you shop.

Ime all 5 yr olds are a pita to take shopping, I know ds is .

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 19:48

Thanks everyone, I don't think we have a push chair big enough thinking about it. Last year, we took her 3 wheeler mountain buggy. Her legs had to sit on a cussion to stop them falling off the sides.
She is quite slim, so it wouldn't be hard to push. I'll check to see if it still fits her.

OP posts:

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 20:02

She does have a speech disorder and is delayed in all areas of development by one year.
She has poor co-ordination, but she is very fit. She can walk long distances, if she wants too.
The push chair would be to keep her calm and contained and stop her running off.
She does have reigns, but she's not very well at the moment.
I might try to get it all on-line actually.

OP posts:

MollieO · 13/12/2009 20:14

I did all mine on line as it is hard shopping on your own with that age child. Ds has hypermobility so gets tired easily and physically is not as strong as his peers but I reckon if I said I was taking the pushchair he'd refuse to leave the house .

cece · 13/12/2009 20:22

I would just assume your DD has some sort of SEN that meant she couldn't walk far. Is that judgey?

scottishmummy · 13/12/2009 20:30

you dont have to justify your needs to strangers.if they stare - ignore em

Pannacotta · 13/12/2009 20:31

I'd go for on-line shopping would be easier for you both IMO.
Thats what I do as I cant do Xmas shopping with DS2 (age 2) as he screams whenever I try and go shopping with him...

ellokitty · 13/12/2009 20:33

I did it yesterday and my 6 year old hasn't got special needs!

I was ill so missed my Christmas shopping weekend (where I can put the children in the creche, whilst I shop ), so had to go to a local town with no creche facilities. Therefore, my daughter had to spend 6 hours wandering round the shops. Even a normal 6 year old can't manage that, so I took the push chair. Made it much more tolerable for everyone involved.

rasputin · 13/12/2009 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 20:46

Good point Rasputin. She tends to sleep if she's bored, but it could go either way.

OP posts:

Original poster

mummyloveslucy · 13/12/2009 20:48

cece- no that's not judgy, that's being kind.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2