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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

How many times a day does your 2-3 year old cry?

76 replies

mummylonglegs · 16/06/2005 22:00

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toothyboy · 16/06/2005 22:05

Ds gets upset over things like that too. I try naming and accepting his emotions "Oh you're upset because...." and he sniffs "Yes". So I offer to help or distract him into something else. He often comes to me saying "Upset" or "Cross". I don't think this sort of crying/frustration should be ignored, they need to know it's OK to sometimes be upset/cross.

Mum2Ela · 16/06/2005 22:09

omg DD cries all the time and I mean all the time atm! Its sooooo wearing

mummylonglegs · 16/06/2005 22:11

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mummylonglegs · 16/06/2005 22:51

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Melpomene · 16/06/2005 22:53

My dd1 (25 months) cries a lot too - most often if she doesn't get her own way over something or if we can't give her as much attention as she'd like. I also have dd2 who is 8 weeks old and I reckon dd1 cries more than dd2 does

I second what toothyboy said about naming emotions. And how about cuddles and distraction? If dd1 is upset a cuddle often helps. If she's having a tantrum or crying in a whiny way I tell her "when you're ready to calm down you can have a cuddle", which often works.

Also if she's frustrated about not being able to do something (eg build the bus) you could empathise that it is tricky and frustrating, and maybe remind her of previous occasions when she has succeeded in doing something tricky or learnt to do something by practising it.

mummylonglegs · 16/06/2005 22:56

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mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 09:18

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aloha · 17/06/2005 09:23

Well, my son doesn't cry as much as this, but everyone's different and some people are more sensitive/emotional/highly strung than others. I also agree with saying, "oh, it is difficult to do this isn't it, and I expect you feel cross and frustrated don't you?" or "You don't want to have your bath because you are having such fun playing and now you feel a bit sad' and suchlike and then distract, distract, distract as energetically as you can. The other day I got my three year old out of the house when he wanted to watch a video and was about to start to cry and shout by literally putting him over my shoulders in a fireman's lift, running out of the room and shouting, "Fire, fire, everybody out of the house!!" By the time we go to the front door he was so started/giggly that he forgot he was going to cry.

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 10:20

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Enid · 17/06/2005 10:22

how does she sleep? She sounds tired.

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 10:26

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Lonelymum · 17/06/2005 10:29

I think this is the age of frustration MLL. If your dd cries because she can't build something with stickle bricks, it is just showing you that she is setting herself targets that are a bit beyond her ability right now. It is perfectly natural and shows that she is developing properly. It doesn't mean she is going to be an unhappy child. Without the tears there would be no determination to try again. Not all children cry as much as yours of course: some are less motivated, some are less ambitious, some (like my ds3, aged 2.4) throw massive tantrums. He is the first of my children to have real 2 yo tantrums and I must say I would prefer the crying myself!

Enid · 17/06/2005 10:33

ok. well, dd1 has two friends (twins) who are 5 and yet still cry on average three times when they come round for tea (if they dont like the food, if they cant watch tv, if they fall over even a tiny bit). They sound spoilt but really they just...well...cry. That is their personality. So maybe that is the way she is.

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 10:58

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Lonelymum · 17/06/2005 11:04

MLL, I forgot to say that my dd (now aged 5) was and still is prone to huge crying scenes if she doesn't get her way (now) or was frustrated about something (when she was younger). It is quite a performance - if her name is not up in lights in the West End in the next 20 years I shall be surprised! She puts her hand to her brow and cries as though she has heard her entire family has been killed in a freak accident - totally over the top.

Does your dd recover quite quickly - I mean, go from crying one minute to playing happily again the next - even if the crying stage lasts a long time?

Lonelymum · 17/06/2005 11:06

Also, are you quite an emotional person? My parents used to think I would be an actress too when I was little because of my abilityn to turn on the emotions. Now as an adult, I am very volatile - easily angry but equally quick to laugh, cry, forgive, forget. Perhaps your dd is the same - emotions taken to their extremes.

Enid · 17/06/2005 11:09

sorry mummylonglegs I didn't mean to imply your dd was spoilt .

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 11:23

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mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 14:35

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TheVillageIdiot · 17/06/2005 15:07

Of she's in a good mood none, other days all-day over the slightest little thing (sorry if the convo has moved on just dived in quickly!)

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 15:16

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Aragon · 17/06/2005 15:28

Whenever he falls over/bangs into something/doesn't get his own way. That accounts for several annoying times a day!

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 15:37

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mandyc66 · 17/06/2005 17:08

my ds3 cries when he is tired. gets a bit frustrated over things that he tries to do but cant. I try to solve the problem and usually does the trick!!
Think girls want to be more independant from a much earlier age than boys so get frustrated when they cant do things! boys/men ..dont mind having things done for them!!!!!!!

mummylonglegs · 17/06/2005 18:37

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