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Original poster

Talk to me about late talkers

41 replies

BlueberryPancake · 26/02/2009 22:00

I'm really worried, although everyone is telling me not to... please share your experiences if you have a child who started talking late.

DS2 will be 2 in April and he doesn't say anything. No mummy, no daddy, nothing at all. He sometimes (rarely) says woof if he sees a dog and wraaa if he sees the image of a lion, but that's it.

I have tried signing, and he doesn't get it even if I repeat the signs often and am consistent.

He seems to play well for his age, he is active and happy, has good coordination, likes toys that 'fit in' with his age. He knows a number of nursery rhymes gestures and he can hum many of them.

The thing is that I remember him saying a few words in around September - he was saying Duck, Ready Steady (well kind of) and mama dada in the right context and has now stopped saying those words.

Another detail is that he started dribbling lately. He rarely babbles (exept if he sees a dog in the park or a cat) but he often makes a nnnn sound. He is on a waiting list for a hearing test.

Sorry this is long. I don't think I'm looking for reassurance from people whose children spoke at a normal age and are going to say 'he'll be fine, don't worry, bla bla bla' I really don't need that.

I would like practical experience from people whose children spoke later, to see if there's anything I should raise already with GP, how to work my way through the sytem, what to ask for, tips on how to improve my communications with DS and how to improve his communications with us.

Thank you.

OP posts:
ingles2 · 26/02/2009 22:05

ds2 was a late talker, due to glue ear... he didn't really speak at all until he was 2+ . It is slightly worrying that he had some speech but seems to have lost it.... Did the GP refer for a hearing test? How long is the waiting list?...
Ds2 developed a very distinct sign language which definitely helped... I know you are trying that but has your ds2 attempted any signs of his own?

ingles2 · 26/02/2009 22:09

meant to say does he attempt communication with his db? peers?

LittleWeePickle · 26/02/2009 22:09

My DS is 19 months and speaks very little. Just started saying Dada, although he also says Up (for going up the stairs) and Ug (for hug).

I feel I've been sooooooo sodding exhausted that I've just neglected to speak to him and play with him enough.

Also, I lived alone for 12 years, so am just not used to chatting when I'm on my own (which I'm not anymore am I?) with a wee one.

I realise now that I haven't done enough nursery rhymes etc which seem to make him "click" into a sort of zone. Am trying harder now, but 39 weeks preg and am just knackered. House is dirty etc etc...

DS is very good with mechanical toys, gears etc, and is very easy going in every way. Maybe he's just an engineer who isn't very talkative?

I'll keep an eye on your thread tho - good luck.

Original poster
BlueberryPancake · 26/02/2009 22:09

There was an 18 weeks waiting list for hearing test (!!!!!) luckily I have managed to brag my way up and he has appointment on 1st April. The GP refered him 'just to be sure'. DS has one sign, he basically lifts his hands up to say 'I'm finished' or 'I want to get out' (highchair, swing,...) but that's it. I've been trying for weeks to get him to rub his tummy or point at his mouth when eating, so that he can tell me if he's hungry, but he doens't get it at all...

OP posts:
Shells · 26/02/2009 22:09

Hi Blueberrypancake.
My DS didn't talk at all til 2.6. By then it had been picked up by the Health Visitor and he was referred to SALTs etc.

There are a lot of people on MN who have had similar situations and I know that pretty much all of them would agree - DON'T leave it. I don't want to alarm you, as he may be fine. But if he needs some help then you're much much better off getting intervention now.

You can ask your GP or your HV for a referral to SALT services, and I have a feeling you can refer yourself too. You will probably want to see a developmental Paediatrician too which i think you have to do through the GP. Don't be fobbed off - it is really important to get into the system.

As for tips - there are loads and loads out there. Talk slowly. Get down to his level. Give him lots of time to respond. Use predictable phrases that he can finish (we used 'ready, steady....' and he eventually said 'go'!).

There are lots of people on here to give you advice on Makaton and other techniques should you wish to use them. Might be an idea to post on SN.

All the best.

Shells · 26/02/2009 22:11

Also, littleweepickle - just read your post. Don't blame yourself for your DS's delayed talking. There can be hundreds of reasons. And 19 months is still young.

Original poster
BlueberryPancake · 26/02/2009 22:12

yes he does communicate with other kids, he loves looking at babies, he points at them, does a little wave of the hand, looks at me and points at the baby again as if saying 'look mummy it's a baby'... he walks up to other children easily at playgroup, gives them toys. If he really likes someone (another child, or one of my friends) he will bring them toys over and over and over again. He does look at people in the eyes and is very cheaky, he laughs a lot.

He's never had a ear infection or anything serious like asma.

OP posts:
Lizzylou · 26/02/2009 22:13

DS1 didn't say anything (apart from a few random words, only ever once) until he was 2. When DS2 came along, coincidentally.

My Neighbour's son was referred to SALT etc at his 2 yr assessment, before the appt came round he was extremely verbal. So much so thta my neighbour agreed that she wished she could turn back time to when he wasn't asking "Why?" etc

Both my boys have had massive dribbbling phases.

Please don't worry, he sounds very normal.

LittleWeePickle · 26/02/2009 22:14

My DS is forgetting words too - I took him to GP a couple of weeks ago, who said that this is normal and nothing to worry about at all.

I am of course very worried, esp when I hear stories of other people's toddlers starting sentences etc...

ingles2 · 26/02/2009 22:14

does his db talk for him?

Original poster
BlueberryPancake · 26/02/2009 22:17

yes, sometimes DS1 speaks for him, so much so that he has invented a voice for his little brother (DS1 is 3.5).

OP posts:
TotalChaos · 26/02/2009 22:20

DS had a severe language delay at 3 - is much improved now but still IMO a year behind in his conversational skills.

Blueberry - definitely worth getting a SALT referral asap - but very positive that your DS is pointing and looking for your reactions to things.

In the meantime, useful websites:-
www.teachmetotalk.com
www.hanen.org
www.ican.org.uk

useful books
Baby talk by Sally Ward
The Parents' Guide to Speech and Language Problems by Debbie Feit
You make the difference or It Takes Two to Talk by Ayola Manolson.

If you are anywhere near a surestart centre, they often run brief courses to help you help your child communicate.

Also - use gestures, repetition, visual clues (photos/pictures), and give your child time to respond to what you are saying - even if it's a sound or gesture rather than a word.

castlesintheair · 26/02/2009 22:21

There are some playgroups that help with language development - Talking Tots being one. As much social activity as possible with peers (playgroups etc) can encourage speech. Also leaving them somewhere for a few hours (nursery) without you can encourage them to speak if they are just a bit lazy. The latter is an idea to rule out a problem iyswim.

isittooearlyforgin · 26/02/2009 22:24

little wee pickle - agree completely with shells

ingles2 · 26/02/2009 22:31

Ah...there is 17 months between my ds1 and 2... ds1 was so busy talking for ds2 that I didn't even notice he had no hearing until his test. DH and I were completely shocked at how poor his hearing was.
Shells has given great advice as has Total Chaos. I suggest you wait for the results of the test and take it from there. If his hearing seems fine insist on a referral to SALT

Lizzylou · 26/02/2009 22:38

Sorry, I misread and thought this was your DS1.
My DS1 spoke when DS2 came (when he was 2).

BUT, my DS1 really didn't say anything when he was your DS2's age, nothing really. He suddenly sprang into life when he had competition from his new younger brother at the age of 2. No hearing problems, I used to read to him for hours/talk to him etc, I think he just didn't need to speak, he got what he wanted when he wanted anyway.

Sorry I got confused

Bubbaloo · 26/02/2009 23:47

My ds2 will also be 2 in April and doesn't talk.He says cat,go,duck,book and ta.
However,he understands everything,also does the actions to nursery rhymes,waves hello and goodbye and spends alot of time making alot of noise.
He had 2 hearing tests just before December and they both came back fine and tbh I'm not overly worried about his lack of talking yet.However,I think if he doesn't start talking by the summer,I may mention it to my hv.

BlackLetterDay · 27/02/2009 01:13

My Ds (2.4) until recently has had few recognisable words, he makes a kind of odd grunty type sound instead of actual words (with the right intonation for words etc iyswim). I did get a referal to salt a few weeks ago but haven't heard back yet. Funny actually in the last 3 weeks his talking has seemed to take off, his pronunciation is improving and he puts about 5 words together (I was talking to his dad about naps and he heard me and said "No nap mummy I'm awright" so cute) , still need a keen ear to understand him mind.

No advice but wanted to say I am in the same boat, ds also went through phases of saying words. At 20 months everything was "oh no" or "oh dear" but then he seemed to forget about it. So it can just seem to suddenly improve from nowhere

MrsSeanBean · 27/02/2009 01:23

DS is 20 months, will be 2 in June. He says:

Buh (Bus)
Bada (Banana)
Mah (man)
Wee-wee (when pointing at the loo!)
Baby - when sees a baby
Ba-ba (Bye bye)
Eye-eye (Hi)

He understands a lot more than he says, for example if you ask him where his cheeks are he will point to them, likewise his chin, mouth, hair, toes etc. He will also poin t out family members - if asked where's Grandma he points to her.

I always understood that as long as they gave signals of undersatanding, there was no cause for concern. I certainly had not thought of involving HV. But am now concerned that perhaps I should just to be 'on the safe side'....?

Sorry, this is probably not very helpful to you BlueberryPancake, but we are possibly in similar sitiations, give or take a few months, so may be useful to compare notes.

cyberseraphim · 27/02/2009 06:34

Does he understand simple instructions like 'Get your shoes?' How would he let you know he was desperate to get a favourite toy? Would he point and make eye contact with you ? I would push for a referral to have all these issues checked.

bigdonna · 27/02/2009 09:15

my dd could babble but no one except me could understand her until she was 5ish she had salt but now speaks very clearly,i have a mindee who did not talk until after 2 then she resited all the books i read to her so she took it all in.i have a liitle boy at the moment who is 2 and can just about say maybe 10 words but not clearly but i know what he means.so they are all different.my dd had a hearing test at 10 days o0ld due to a pin prick mark on her ear,she has had about another 6 tests since then there was nothing wrong with her hearing.

Original poster
BlueberryPancake · 27/02/2009 09:43

yes he points, knows body parts, gets his favorite toys when asked. He (not bragging here) knows his numbers from 1 to 9 (if a selection of numbers are in front of him and I ask him to point at number two, he points at number 2, and can do all the numbers except 1 and 7 which he gets confused) he knows his colors (can point at red car, blue car, etc). He will not 'play' the piano if there isn't a music sheet in front of him (don't ask) and will take me by the hand and point at the fridge if he wants milk, point at the sink if he wants water, etc.

I know he is very clever, and I am confident that he doesn't have a serious behaviour or developmental problem. But he still doesn't speak, or repeat sounds, or imitate sound or intonations, or even pretend to babble there is so little sounds coming out of his mouth.

People tell me I shouldn't be worried but I am, and sorry guys who don't agree but I think I should be worried. Because a- he doesn't say anything at all, and b- he is so quiet. and c- it freaks me out that there's an 18 week wait for a hearing test, how long is it oging to be when he is refered to a speach therapist????

OP posts:
Lizzylou · 27/02/2009 09:46

If he can get what he wants by pointing/taking you there, why does he need to speak?
He may well have hearing/speech problems, I don't know, but I do know that with my DS1 he didn't need to speak as he got what he wanted anyway.
Hope you can push for someone to see him sooner.

ilovesprouts · 27/02/2009 09:56

my ds 26months does not talk at all he omly says mmm ddd,found out hes got gdd does not walk by his self but can holding on sofa etc speak to your hv if u have any worries i did

cyberseraphim · 27/02/2009 09:57

Does he enjoy listening to stories - something like 'The GingerBread Man' ? Does he laugh at all the right bits? Does he usually copy what you do (apart from speech) ? There's a lot you report that sounds very positive esp. sharing attention about the baby (pointing/making eye contact). I still think you need a proper assessment to get some ideas on how to develop all the positive stuff.